Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Day 617 The measure of myself here.

The measure of myself

In dealing with people and presenting the measure of my understanding, I react. It is as though the patience to follow through, to let go and to move with the measure of what is here is not fluent. This means I am getting stuck on beliefs, opinions and ideas in and as the measure of my experience, the measure of my awareness. The gift of life is placed right in front of us, as this actual physical world, and I have abdicated that life in believing that what I think, as the composition of my thoughts as the measure of my experiences is more real. Really astounding- which is an interesting word, because it has the word sound imbedded within it, and the letters a and t . Like the alpha and the omega, where the a is the starting point as the alphabet, where I use the letters to create words to bet with others, to win, when the gift is already given, as the physical as life which is the value. And, the t is the choice, the crossroads of my choice, the apple of my eye, where I decide to respect the tree of life as the physical, or a belief in a good and or a bad in and as value judgements in and as the process of believing that one thing is bad and another is good which is creating a relationship to myself as my idea of myself as an accumulation of my experiences that I allow to begin to define me, as direct me, and then I, if I do not realize this, begin to blame the outside world because it is not moving as my experience manifest as my thoughts, created from comparison. Comparison is not necessarily a bad. When comparison is used in self interest and not realized as such, what is moved into is value judgements in defense of one’s experience instead of for what the qualities as the characteristics of what something is which is evident in the utility of the form. Thus, it is astounding that I sound my inner experience turned value judgement over remaining in equality to and with life, as the physical to sound in accord with this physical which is the means of life, the gift placed right here in front of us, as life would be and do, because this is how it would work in all practical common sense.

Thus, when I worry about rejection, or what someone might or might not say, I am separating myself from being here. I am not realizing the very gift of myself as life in practice in measure, in awareness of using this sense that reads/senses my experiential memory and directing this to practical physical reality and realizing that I can as this that can move from mind memory to here awareness is always right here in all ways, it is fluid, it is mutable, it can sense time and space, here, it can move with limitation, accept it, speak up, cross reference, double check, slow down and ground me back here, to as myself as life, realize the volume of practical reality - and the divisions and limited information of our present accepted and allowed system that dis-regards this in self interest, as this system is simply a reflection of the separation from using self as life to common sense physical reality as the formation of life. I am not going to go into this here, one can investigate this systemic form that is a smoke and mirrors show bullied through a media ( my god)  using the quality of human nature that takes in information and utilizes it- like being programmed- until it defines self, or, one could say, is believed to be a truth, and then the physical is forced into the limited construct, which overall is very destructive and cannot and will not work. Just think about how unpure the very air is in our world, and our waters, and realize that ripping apart the physical to fit into an idea about  what is more and what is less, is an abdication of self as life. Period. Can’t work. The sooner we realize this, the sooner we can change and equalize to life and work together to get this destruction cleaned up.  We have essentially allowed the majority of humans to serve the building of a pyramid. The moment a laborer is no longer useful they are turned out, and, as we can see, the laws are geared towards criminalizing the homeless- those who have been turned out. So, basically, if you as a human serve no purpose in the building of this pyramid, you are compost. lol Yes, that is basically what you are useful for. That idea of yourself as your mind, it is a sitcom that has become a program that is no longer wanted. Can you blame the pyramid? No, they are just another program, one that is in separation from life.  
Thus if I take the measure as another television, program, personally, I am fearing to not have my program, my television, my experience accepted. Yet, in understanding that I can change, because what I am within is only a measure of what I belief, I can reformat this and cross reference what might be the understanding of another and become a relationship to practical physical reality as my starting point and ground myself within all this to direct, with investigation of that which is good and does no harm, because nothing can define me unless I accept and allow it, and the physical is always right here, standing with me, always was, and always will be, as the physical is life information, it is the sound of what can withstand the test of time, it is the technology of life in formation.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to respect life.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize the value is myself as life equal and one to and as the physical here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that what I am within as a personification of my experience of reality as the physical need not define who and what I am here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not let go, with every breath, in every moment, what I have accepted and allowed to define me, as value judgements of one thing being more than another, an act of comparison and competition which is ultimately an illusion, and myself in separation from myself as life, and for this I forgive myself for allowing myself to believe that what exists as myself within as a reflection which is a shadow of reality, defines who and what I am here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to move into self pity, when and as I have no agreement with another in thought word and deed.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to slow down and ground myself here in practical reality, and to allow myself to not resist what is here, as what is here can change and move into understanding form and function as the practice of living in a physical manifestation of life as life would.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become inferior to life, believing that what I construct as my experience as my inner selective value system, to be greater than life itself as life is physical and here, where I can live in the moment and become equal and one to and as it, to express myself life here, to focus here and direct myself in ways that do no harm.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear losing my experience as though in losing this I would not have any memory, like photo albums to show off my experiences to tout as what I  am, in fear that I would not survive in this system, when in all practical reality the value is being here, equal and one with and as life as the physical, because this is creation information, here.
When and as I find myself beginning to move into protection and self defense, which is myself constructing myself with in, as though I am grabbing onto my experience, memory that I have allowed to define me,  I stop and I breath, I slow myself down and I asses what measure I have accepted and allowed that is of energy, and I forgive that which I fear to lose, and I see, realize and understand that I am here, that the value is being physical as life, that what is within me can change and ground here, into and as what is of sound mind and as such can withstand the test of time, and become equal and one to the measure of space as the physical as life in expression that is eternal, and to then not fear change, as change is the process of transformation only, which is actually fun.

When and as I find myself moving into a stagnant self protective act of blame and spite, I stop and I breath and I slow myself down, and I cross reference my accepted and allowed measure as belief, that has embedded into the physical through repetition, and I forgive and change as direct in common sense of practical reality, to and towards that which is good and does no harm and becomes an expression of respect for all life as me in another life form here.



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