We are the manufacturers of our own separation from life. Where does our health insurance money go? Day 718

Sometimes an article comes up that I find so astounding, I can hardly believe I have accepted this, or rather, not researched it and looked at the numbers. Numbers do not lie.

This article about the payouts from insurance companies for the number of vaccines a doctor gives to children is unacceptable. Yet, it begs the question as to why we are allowing this overall. This means that we support incentives for vaccination with our insurance programs. This means that the companies producing the vaccines are not even paying the doctors, or rather, motivating the doctors to vaccinate children without investigation. We are allowing this when we do not investigate the monetary structures. We allow this when we do not follow the money- a statement that is ubiquitous. So many have said that one must follow the money. One must read, one must use a natural capacity to do the math, and investigate to realize that it is the web of all of us that maintains the present system. 

The idea of a superman is the opposite of what is real, as it is the web of men that build and allow negligent resource extraction, a mis-use of resources that effect all the life that is here on this earth. Again, it is the numbers of men, that build what exists or, as in the case of this article, hold in place, based on ideas and beliefs and opinions that have no real follow through into the forms and mechanisms of money flow. That money flow is your labor moving into allowing others to make decisions for you. It is the consequence of a lack of investigation, it is  a lack of the self sensing practical reality, what is right here, visible, known and written out in an article.

With a doctor potentially getting 80,000$ for fulfilling a quota of vaccination, paid for with your labor via insurance policies,  would that doctor really want to investigate anything about vaccines? Would you want to give up 80,000$ a year? Would you want to give up the comforts that kind of money would allow? Would you become irritable if someone threatened to take that from you? Would you turn a blind eye to patterns around you?  Just look at the math, a vaccine in itself does not cost 400$. Yet, you are paying this incentive to not look, to not investigate through your insurance policies.  This whole form, as this action, also begs the question as to why such incentives must be used, to buy obedience!

We are programmed to live a false story, a false and limited set body of information. This is why we are held in a school that only teaches through abstraction of information. This is the means for that limited inform of information. It denies one’s natural ability to sense qualities in space and time. This is so visible all around us in our loss of spatial ability. We have, for eons, believed that what we create with our imagination is greater than what is around us. It is as simple as that. The solution is to realize the mis-use of our imaginations and become living words, words that respect this world around us. We can use words to investigate this travesty of life, as this present system, and remove the veil of our separation into this busy work composed of limited values, made huge, and step into what has always been here, right in front of us, this manifestation of creation, a symbiotic and functional creation that reveals itself with the potential of a balance that can flow with ease and grace. This is the real nature of life, and it is always here.

An exanple is using our tongues. We can taste bitter, we can taste sour, we can taste something savory, or tart. These flavors reveal qualities. Something that is sour is usually more acidic. We can then investigate what acids do and how they work. The information is here, as we are in the age of information.  if we place a piece of copper in water and let it sit, we can then drink the water and realize a slight taste of copper. We can rub a piece of garlic on the soles of out feet and sense a taste of garlic on our tongues.  This is natural, and yet it has somehow become novel! How did that happen? Obviously, it happened because we allowed something else to overshadow these innate sensibilities. 

As yourself why the media is so ubiquitous? Ask yourself why there are systemic forms that pay doctors incentives to not LOOK HERE? Your capacity to live is go great, that to deny that capacity a film of information that is not the real story must be constantly imposed, and with systemic layers that are not fully disclosed yet must exist somewhere because it can then be construed that we accepted it. In effect, we did, because we dod not investigate. 

Life, by nature, is forgiving, it need only be accepted. This is one’s self. Either that self continues within a false use of the imagination or makes the choice to stand with steadfastness to redefine one’s presence back into all things, which includes the physical world.  How does one cause chaos? Through creating a belief in another world, with a god, to separate one from the real ‘ god’ which is this creation, this physical reality, this means to understand life, to sense it, to taste the nature of it and how it works in balance, in ways that do no harm and consider all things, taking that which is good. 

If these incentives for vaccinating children were removed, ( and our health insurance payments lowered- thereby freeing up our individual economies to have a greater ability to choose!) what would happen with the whole vaccine debate? Would greater numbers of doctors stand in understanding what is happening or not happening? Do we have the courage to ask doctors about these payments? Do we have the courage to face the storm of what is emotional resistance, that we all know very well, which is a persona of irritation and anger and name calling and blame? Can we realize in a moment, were we to ask questions directly in a doctor’s office that reactive behaviors towards such questions are a form of protection and defense in self interest? Can we stand without reaction ourselves and realize that what we face is a construct of misinformation cluttered with a limited set body of information causing a dissonance from practical reality? Can we step beyond our fears of being defined as being ‘ difficult’ and remain with making a statement that we need to investigate what is offered by this system without taking threats and name calling personally? It really only takes one time to not give in, after that it gets easier. We can do this, we can stand. Together. This is the real power, the web of men making the choice to relate words to real life, this life around us, and no longer accepting a limited story that has an outcome of separating us from life, from reality - so visible in a loss of a natural spatial ability, and an ability to taste the sweet and the sour, the bitter and the savory. Why not forgive the chaos of limitation and become what is natural?

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/270216046372259268/

Day 183 Reactions within interactions

So, yesterday I had a young man show up at my house to help me with something. He is a friend of one of my sons. I noticed that I was careful with him, in that I had the thought to not be too friendly, to keep a distance. This being the role of myself being the friend’s mother.
It is moments like these where I stop and I breath and I simply become what is needed to complete what is being done without any idea about what I am supposed to be, when all there is is doing what needs to be done.
Within this, this “idea” of what I am supposed to be popped up. And within it came memories of being a child at home, as I slowed down and concentrated on what needed to be done, myself just trying to be there and be myself in common sense.
That I would actually spend time considering how I should “present” myself to this young man opens up a whole belief system in terms of fears of judgements. Fear that my behaviors will be taken incorrectly, fears that I might scare this young man away, fears of what neighbors will think.
One prominent persona that popped up was the this worry of making this male uncomfortable. So, I kept a distance. Like I said I had to stop and simply use common sense.
I noted this and later looked at it after the work had been done.
This “persona “ is like a cast around me, like a film, and it is a personality that worries about upsetting the man- so to speak. I realize within this that when I am with a man in my home, I worry about his state of mind. And this comes from childhood, this is programmed in during childhood. If advertising didn’t work it would not exist, but the fact that it exists and is very repetitive means that we are programable and that programming us focuses us onto what the one that has the means to place what is wanted as the “program to be.”
Religion is really no different. It developed before modern technology. And it demanded that people attend church and learn prayers and then repeat the prayers. Again there is repetition.
None of this is actually teaching an understanding of what it means to focus, what the actual common sense of focus is, they are more a “taking of focus” a “forcing of focus” onto a construct of a set of ideas and belief and opinions without any actual understanding of the initial act of self as what self is as self directing in the act of being and focusing, where a sense is developed in actual physical reality. I mean, in common sense, learning prayers to something that is not seen is ridiculous, and it bypasses what is actually physically here.
Advertising does the same thing. It promotes food items that do not reveal what is the substance of the food items. So, one learns to follow and desire something without any awareness of what the thing actually is, of what is actually here, of what are the parts of the things used in the food item. Here, dietitians and doctors become the invisible god as so many endorse these things, and we follow. Do we ever really look? Or are we too tired at the end of the day after flipping endless paper work? This cannot be an excuse.

In all this kind of programming happened in childhood, and on many levels, as the whole structure of our society is like a web upholding all of these programs. Meanwhile there is no longer any common sense in relation to what is actually physically here.
In a system of profit this can be used to allow some to have more than others. This allows things to be placed that take control, if we allow them. Obviously, what is needed is to direct focus within common sense of what is actually here, physically here. And obviously this can be developed as the human is very capable of this, of developing into and as “something” because of the fact that we are programmable! Which is to say that we are able to be developed!
Since this earth is such a mess, the current program is not one that is supportive of life. and obviously it allows some to live lives of excess and others extreme lack. And obviously, some have nothing to even sustain themselves and thus focus on mere survival, as this is what is presented.
It takes a moment of stopping and breathing, coming here to what is real, actually physically here, and seeing how there are ideas, and opinions and beliefs learned in the past as a persona directing instead of self being in direct actual physical common sense of what is actually physically here.
Take the time to slow down, and breath, and look at what is actually here. Take the time to stop and breath to see the actual personifications as directives based on non-investigated equal and one physical common sense awareness of what is actually here.
Then begin self forgiveness to bring yourself back to what is actually supporting you as life, this physical actual real world.
Join Desteni, time to birth life equal and one to what is actually physically real. Stop abdicating to ideas presented within a system of inequality.

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Day 163 Reactions within Confusion

Day 163 Reactions within confusion
A memory coming up of having a fever. I must have been in 4th or 5th grade. I was placed in an air-conditioned room to, I guess, keep me cool. My fever was so high there were people coming out of the air conditioner. Ugly, screaming people, clawing and attempting to get me, or so this was my perception. I woke up today with a sense of distortion as myself. Like one want/desire/need being some kind of a distortion, where a sense of myself had all manner of shapes, like I was one major distortion as the character of myself, this was like things coming out of the air conditioner. The mind is like a visual air conditioner, a condition of distortion. Anger and righteousness more reaction, a protest only, in a bubble, no solution- and we are trained to be this, we accept this. Fear and anger being distortion of reality, reactive within protection and defense, ignoring direction, blinded by having judgement from a photograph of limited detail/awareness as what a photo would be in separation from actual physical reality, it is how we anthropomorphize what is here, and create cartoon characters of exaggeration, bringing out selective characteristics, making some bigger than others and thus distorting reality. Our Rumpelstiltskins are the ones left behind, attempting to survive, to be remembered within society, and they are never going to go away, as they are aspects of our behavior as the distortion. Avoidance is ignorance, and what is ignored does not suddenly disappear, it cannot, it is nature ignored within the distortion made in anthropomorphism, in selecting limited qualities and trying to force them into singular expressions. Thus avoidance is resistance, and resistance persists, as the division is a whole, no happy face, as positive facade, can hide a value diminished as less than, ignored, judged.
In becoming behaviors in and as reactions, energetically, protection and defense of survival build walls of separation, it is like a self anthropomorphism, a distortion, a fantasy escape of justification from reality. Protection and defense as borders around limited qualities that ignore the physical gift of life, a composite of the whole energetic separation, layers of separation individualized and made huge, understood to be what is real, when it is not, it is like self in a fever, the fever being energy, burning and consuming the body, all the while the life within self simply wanting a state of ease, this “state” that is believed must be achieved through rape and pillage, when it is what self is, as self as life, the nature of self as life, right here, with the actual physical world as guide.
Meanwhile, I have fallen, these last days, in worries, in morality. I have lead myself, as a single mother, through stopping and telling myself that the answer is right here in front of me, and usually I have to calm down to see the answer, slow way down. This is always here, and must be modeled. The nature of life must be modeled, perhaps it is the only way, as this is the way to learn. Those violin teachers that directed and never judged, modeled, they would pick up their instruments and play, model, physically show. And the ones that did this were the ones that had mastered playing.
Slowing down and breathing is stopping the distortion.
In confusion, I am fused with the distortion and I can no longer see what is actually physically here, as I am looking for answers within the distortion; a distortion difficult to name as it morphes what is real, and perpetually changes, like a mirage on the horizon in hot weather.
we, the human are like walking anthropomorphized ideas, beliefs and opinions, totally separate from reality, from the physical, naturally there can be no answers here. This is limited, and separate from reality, the actual physical.
That child is a child and not a sex object.
As a child I was being taught distortion, and not equality and oneness with what was physically real, here, given freely to express life.
I was looking for answers and means to support myself within the distortion, as the behaviors as words surrounding me were one and the same as myself as my behavior of confusion, words supporting the distortion that were what was taught to my parents and their parents, this the continuation of the fever as mind as energy in separation from this physical, actual world of support.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to desire to win something, as in having an understanding with my parents as a child, ignoring the actual physical world.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that my confusion was just as I called it, named it, telling me what i was, as what I was accepting and allowing, attempting to be and become the very distortion, meaning separation from common sense of this actual physical world, where this sense of the physical world, as common sense I had come to believe was something dirty, as this was another reprimand given with the choice of friends, and involvements made and then judged and denigrated by the mind of distortion as I learned to accept the characters as values that fit into the persona of my family, as what held a believed point of survival within a system of separation into more than and less than, that divides and conquers what is freely given by this earth to support life, manifest as a hierarchy of a few having more than what is needed to support themselves as life, ignoring the suffering of other life forms as on this earth, not realizing that no one will become life on this one organism called earth until all are equally supported as life, as who would want parts of an organism that have not considered the whole?
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand my own distortion of reality, as a survival suit of characters and personas that is a mirage placed on the horizon of this earth, consuming my human physical body, as this distortion is a virus of destruction of what is not one and equal to life, and thus is an act of life protecting itself, removing what is not supportive of the whole, removing what is not one and equal to life as life, and thus what is not aware as life, will not exist as it is in separation from life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to “suck in” myself like a constriction, like a vacuum inward into and as fear, separating myself from here, from this actual physical world, like I am becoming a build of protection and defense as justification to protect what? It really seems that there is nothing there within this action, as it is not directive but myself getting ready to “push back” in defense, based on an idea that is what i have been taught that bears no witness to what is actually real here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand how much I do this all the time, as this is all that I have been, this has become habit and the only way to stop this is to breath and forgive myself in common sense of what is physically actually here, where breath is a kind of reading of what is actually physically here as reality.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become a behavior of protection and defense, bracing myself to protect myself whether passively or actively, two sides of the same coin, where I take on a distorted facade as what has been taught, where if my presentation is not accepted I become confusion and look for answers in the shields taught and within this searching, look for a holy grail to shield myself, and end up in an empty, blank place of no common sense and lose my ground, so removed from what is physically real that I become a blank, and feel confused, the confusion, being blank and feeling like there is no place to go because I am going no where, as I am ignoring the actual physical world and am not breathing and being in common sense of this physical world, the very support and substance of life here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that even one thought that this cannot be done, is an illusion, is the mind.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting the behavior as what I am being and allowing as having, be a voice as the habit of what I have accepted and allowed as this searching for answers within and as the shields of protection and defense as what I am supposed to do as what was taught, looking to and towards this and believing that common sense is impossible, difficult, irritating, as this does not maintain the mirage as the distortion and the fantasy as mind as the separation from life in common sense of this physical world.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that knowledge and information is just this, and as this cannot have any sense of this actual physical world, where knowledge and information is no sounding, physical substantive sounding, sensing of what is actually here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to ignore the layers of facade as energy masking acceptance of the physical, as energetic highs hiding a low, as the low is resistance of the whole, is ignorance of what is actually physically here, as limited values are what is accepted.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that there will be no life until all humans realize common sense, until all that is of this earth is cared for as life, as this is the value, and that the mind of separation will be reactive and protest, ignore and blame, avoid and deny as it clings to a happy face, as supposed positive energy even until the last ounce of energy is burned off with no more support as this is the nature of clinging to an idolized value as being more than something else, a delusion ignoring what is actually here in totality.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that there is no real pretty “happy face way” to face reality here, where I realize that my fear, as what I am within standing within and as confusion, is wanting to find some polite/happy/easy/ pleasant way to reveal that reality is not what is being respected and treated as life, the forgiving of self in gratefulness and thanks for the value that is here which is life, that which must be what is realized for all that exists on this earth, a life of dignity, where there is absolutely no excuse, non what so ever that any form of neglect and abuse of any single one thing on this planet is justifiable, as that is insanity in self interested gain with out equal consideration of all life. Period.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that my confusion is simply an escape from reality, a “not wanting to look”, a wanting to be “nice “ about what has been accepted and allowed as ignorance of what is in fact real, which is this physical world.

I commit myself to speaking up about how the “positive - supposed “happy face” is the crime of ignorance against life,
I commit myself to asking the question as to what a happy face will do for the children who suffer from lack of food, lack of education, lack, as a with-holding of freely given resources on earth, of shelter just so some can cover the rot of their bodies under make-up and opulence unnecessary and unexpressive of any kind of equal communication with all the life that is of this earth.
I commit myself to realize that the ONLY thing a truth will hurt is a self interested ego, as this is what ego is in fact, set of limited values clung to in a limited belief that one thing is more than another, when this is the illusion, an illusion that cannot even communicate with all that is here that is life, having no understanding of life, as, if such an understanding of life exist, then no abuse in any form would be what is here on earth, that this indicates the presence of separation and lack of self awareness as life, in oneness and equality with life as the very substance of what all that is here consists of and exists as. Period.
I commit myself to no longer fearing the avoidance tactics of ego, the resistance of what persists and compounds as abuse, as what is ignored on this earth, blatant abusive ignorance, hiding behind -, avoiding what is negative as though this is going to make this world a better place, which is total irresponsibility and ignorance, contained within all self pitying statements as “I do the best I can”.
I commit myself to realizing that when I become confused and blank within seeking a response, where I physically feel like I am condensing in some way, I am in fact looking for some pretty way of speaking up, as facing telling the truth is what I fear, looking at what is actually physically here, as I might be called more of the same as what an ego would answer, the very same words I heard as a child, that i am impossible, difficult and irritating, because in the end, being in common sense of life here, is extremely irritating to the limited self interests of the idols as values distorted and made more than other values, when what is not one and equal as what is realized is that the value is life.

The creation of the mind.

Life Review series, to realize separation and the consequences thereof.

The Consciousness of the Fly and much more!

Quantum Mind

The practical solution Equal Money

Creation's Journey to Life

Heaven's Journey To Life

Earth's Journey To Life

A playlist of documentaries

Pinterest list of articles  and videos on out current environment

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