A natural ability to be PRESENT Day 768

I have moments from the past where I looked at something and had a noses that something was out of whack. It usually was a focus where I could not explain why I thought something was out of whack, or, as another way to say this is, ‘ not in synch.”

This is something I think is innate to all of us, as what we are. This is something that each one of us can realize. If anything we get caught up in the details of expressing ourselves as we cannot line up the words that paint the picture of the math that we see, or sense, being not in synch, somehow, in the world around us. 

I can think of numerous instances in my life where this has happened. And I can compare this to performing to realize, as I had over the years, of what was happening that was the cause of both being able to sense something being out of synch and an ability to not quite be able to call out by name the math, the movement, the sense of the whole not being in balance. It is all around us, and we are the perfect mechanisms to understand this. We have all sensed this at some point in our lives. It has to be because of what we are, as forms, in totality. The statement that the veil is thin, is around and has been around for a reason, because it is a description of what is happening. It sticks , it holds, it cannot be denied.

I remember an instance where I really looked at my nephew, who is autistic.  I mean, I stood there and really LOOKED. Meaning, I sensed him, in calm, just stood there and sensed him. Instead of being in fear of his erratic and unconventional movements, in relation to comparison ONLY, based on comparison within standard expectations, I LOOKED at him. I was not in a state of resistance, I just LOOKED. What came to me was a sense that he was completely out of synch within himself.  It appeared that all the anxieties I knew from my family where swirling around ‘ in there’ and that this being was simply not able to synchronize with presence, his body and presence in a stable way, in a focus without an interference causing a huge effort to get himself to focus here. 

Having such a ‘ thought’ about this, and this was before desteni , is overall telling. Why do I not trust such a thing? And why can I not see my own details that yet lack details? And why not stand up and say this! Why not trust myself enough to speak up as this? In all common sense we are physical BIO- LOGICal forms, and within my sense of a LACK of an ability to FOCUS as what I see, I am basically telling myself, revealing to myself, what is actually happening to the being in space and time. How is it that what is so obvious is ignored? I mean, if I can sense water getting hot to make tea, for example, or if I can sense a change in barometric pressure, or if I can feel the bite of a tick, why the fuck can I not sense the movement and flow and focus of another human being? Of course I can, as the very nature of what and who I am as the same physical information as this world around me. The only thing that would stop this, is information counter to this, said again ad again and again, that I would begin to FOLLOW that would be counter to what the FUCK I AM! What do we think the whole “ Plato’s wall” and  the Machiavellian construct of voicing blame and spite as dis- SENT as information is and does? The math of separation is VISIBLE and all around us!  In so many ways, it is actually not a rocket science, or, one could say we are the most perfect of mechanisms to sense the science of the physical around us. And why? Because we are of the same stuff! 

An act of seeing ONLY the lack, and not also realizing the means of change out of that lack, in tandem with the behavior of calling out that lack ONLY, is a distraction of looking at the self - that self that has an innate ability to realize when something in this physical realm is out of synch, is out of harmony, is out of real presence, as out of FOCUS HERE.  To ignore, or reject, or not use this sensibility as who and what we are, and to ONLY point out that lack - is that same sensibility being used, which means a sensibility exists! It is an admission of what we are, it is only that it is being MISS-used. 

If one focuses ONLY on a resonant belief that was accepted and recited or used again and again, and FOLLOWED as that resonant belief within,  which is a practice of and as following something instead of using an innate sense, which is a rejection of the self as life - life being a natural sensibility - then one becomes out of synch with this reality. This is something that no one can blame on any one or thing around them. And it can only be self corrected. This is a resonant entity, it is a MINED CON-SCIENCE. One has become and practices a consciousness of separation.  The subconscious being the foundation of the parents being the same, and the unconscious this of the overall system, all accumulations as ideas, beliefs and opinions, composed in separation as a focus on LIMITED information accepted and allowed. This is, in other words, not a rocket science. The degree to which one cannot realize this, is the degree of one’s separation. It is visible in how much one projects the limited storied information onto objects around one, instead of standing within what is natural and innate, which is the ability to sense the whole and the parts, that ‘ nagging ‘ sense that something is out of whack, that each and every one of us has as who and what we really are. 

If one does a discipline, such as performing with an instrument, in a group, it begins, over time, to become obvious when one is not in synch with the group and begs the question as to what is causing this out-of-synchness. The only thing that can block this, is within the self. One must ask the question as to what is blocking the focus ? One must listen to the body to realize what it is that is blocking the focus. What I noticed was that a part of me was focusing on, my children, when they were  younger- for example. I had to learn to let one thing go, in the space for the moment that I was in, and focus on where I was. A consequence of this, after I had realized this, was that then chancing from the one to the other, was in itself challenging. This revealed to me that I was sluggish within myself, but in common sense I should be able to do this, as this was actually being mature ( as the terms I used and learned within this discipline).  This, overall, is being a master of self, and creating a self. Yet, overall, this begged another question as to why any resistance to something was not realized for what it was, and why our system did not take this into consideration and even used this for gain, through forcing beliefs, and dis-allowing this to live in synch with this reality and how this all works! How many times has one realized that past actions were not what was best, and has shame for such actions, not wanting to go back and correct them? How many times have we wallowed in such, defining ourselves as such, using this very limited piece of a movement, to define ourselves to make ourselves ‘ better’ within a bubble of realization, instead of moving beyond this into realizing the moving parts within the whole, in relation to all of this? It is an indication of having lost a focus on the whole, which means one has an embedded resonance that has become larger than reality, that is what is distracting the self from being who and what we are by capacity, into sensing mis-takes of and as our state of being, in relation to an innate ability to SENSE, to be in COMMON SENSE of the overall movement and expression of this LIVING REALITY around us that is the same as us. This reality, as the physical is a beautiful design. We are the means to understand and create.  We need only recognize the resonant ghost of mis-information through limited story accepted and allowed as reality, yet not ourselves standing within ourselves as who and what we really are. And, in a sense, all of our actions are us wanting to ultimately be in synch with this reality, because it is who and what we really are as this is the means of us being in living expression. 

Just look at all the dogmas of self definition, based on environment and culture, the dogmas of religion and politics, ask yourself if these things lend life expression. Hold your breath, focus on those values and see if they can ultimately sustain you, or if what sustains you is BREATHING.  This means that the PHYSICAL trees are necessary, or supersede any inner BELIEF system. Thus, what is ultimately real? 

An interesting thing happened those years I was performing with small groups. As I started to sort this out within myself, to realize what I was doing within myself, I had people come up to me and say to me that I had a lot of PRESENCE on stage.  I looked at this, with surprise and self interest, as I did that of which I speak, and did not relate this to what I was sorting out and realizing within myself. Yet, as I become more a master of myself, within my self, in relation to what I was doing, that focus improved and people noticed it. 

What also happened, is nasty comments also came to me. It appeared as an  out-of-context statement. I would react, yet also, had experienced a sense of myself knowing when I was in synch and present, meaning I knew when I was in focus, what I had not rehearsed enough etc. to know that no one could really know what I was being but myself. This was enough to begin to know the difference between supportive criticism and just simple nasty criticism. 

Supportive criticism opens doors, as though it defines what one already senses, and is very clear- meaning one sees it immediately and is thankful. Nasty criticism usually makes no sense, and confuses. And yet, I know very good players who have a hard time between the two, which is an indication of not being in synch in itself- but that is within the individual. 

If I can sense this, and this is something that is known, it means that that same sense in the self, is alive and present. The ability to sense the different colors of this, overall substantiates what is innate within all of us, as who and what we are, as living beings that are physical, and can sense the most subtle of things, down to seeing, realizing and understanding when we face an autistic person, that what is happening with that person, is a serious state of being out of synch with reality, with this physical reality. 

This means that it is probably a cause of a number of things, that we have allowed pollutants in our environment from NOT LOOKING, and we have allowed a resonance of NOT LOOKING, that is causing what we are to be out of synch. We are therefor creating physical discord with reality within and as what we are placing as a math of separation, as a measure of separation as what we hold within us, that is of limited information, to inform the physical. It is , if we LOOK , as what is natural to what and who we are,  the cause of so much out-of-synchness in our world today. We are moving against life. Yet we are, as the very nature of ourselves and the physical, as what is natural, the ability to move in synch with creation, as the physical reality that is life that is all around us. 

On the world stage, it appears to me, that the bully of the media and certain institutions we have collectively allowed and as men, because the power is in the numbers, as men composing the system - it appears to me, that just as a nasty person realizing in contrast to a noticeable presence, attack and try and force a limitation to hide a reality. This behavior in itself screaming a separation from self, not wanting anyone to see that that self has rejected itself as life, and moving to attack anything that exposes its separation, and/or in many ways, a crying out of separation, as the practice of separation is all that is known, and all the expression of the entity knows how to be. So is it with some of our present systems, such as the CDC and the whole vaccine scenario. it is like it is screaming its demise, trying to hold onto something that is being exposed, and instead of LOOKING, does everything in its capacity to continue a false narrative. Thus, the movement of lack, in the overall system, behaves the same as what I experienced in my life in relation to movements and expressions around me. Thus, it is  a pattern, recognizable, and of a measure, or math in this reality, visible and understandable within its accepted and allowed state of being. We individuals are no different. Such patterns can only exist within small measure, as a separation is a loss of presence, and only able to hold a chaos of no real self directive capacity- which is visible in its lack. If we take the time to look, can we not see the actions of institutions being that scared accusatory voice that uses hyperbole as limited value judgements that have no real clear description and directive practical measurable steps that open awareness, that point out where one is, with clarity and then give a measure that appears to voice just what one was seeing but was only on the cusp of calling out by name with clarity in the moment and therefor incredibly thankful of the clarity that defines effective practice that is a joy in and as self discovery into real self creation? The difference between the two is HUGE, and visible, if one takes the time to really LOOK.  This ability is the capacity of who and what each and everyone of us is as life. It is time that we create ourselves as life, which means to stand in the image and likeness of this practical and physical and visible reality. We all have moments where we realize this. We need only LOOK here. Breathe. 

We are the manufacturers of our own separation from life. Where does our health insurance money go? Day 718

Sometimes an article comes up that I find so astounding, I can hardly believe I have accepted this, or rather, not researched it and looked at the numbers. Numbers do not lie.

This article about the payouts from insurance companies for the number of vaccines a doctor gives to children is unacceptable. Yet, it begs the question as to why we are allowing this overall. This means that we support incentives for vaccination with our insurance programs. This means that the companies producing the vaccines are not even paying the doctors, or rather, motivating the doctors to vaccinate children without investigation. We are allowing this when we do not investigate the monetary structures. We allow this when we do not follow the money- a statement that is ubiquitous. So many have said that one must follow the money. One must read, one must use a natural capacity to do the math, and investigate to realize that it is the web of all of us that maintains the present system. 

The idea of a superman is the opposite of what is real, as it is the web of men that build and allow negligent resource extraction, a mis-use of resources that effect all the life that is here on this earth. Again, it is the numbers of men, that build what exists or, as in the case of this article, hold in place, based on ideas and beliefs and opinions that have no real follow through into the forms and mechanisms of money flow. That money flow is your labor moving into allowing others to make decisions for you. It is the consequence of a lack of investigation, it is  a lack of the self sensing practical reality, what is right here, visible, known and written out in an article.

With a doctor potentially getting 80,000$ for fulfilling a quota of vaccination, paid for with your labor via insurance policies,  would that doctor really want to investigate anything about vaccines? Would you want to give up 80,000$ a year? Would you want to give up the comforts that kind of money would allow? Would you become irritable if someone threatened to take that from you? Would you turn a blind eye to patterns around you?  Just look at the math, a vaccine in itself does not cost 400$. Yet, you are paying this incentive to not look, to not investigate through your insurance policies.  This whole form, as this action, also begs the question as to why such incentives must be used, to buy obedience!

We are programmed to live a false story, a false and limited set body of information. This is why we are held in a school that only teaches through abstraction of information. This is the means for that limited inform of information. It denies one’s natural ability to sense qualities in space and time. This is so visible all around us in our loss of spatial ability. We have, for eons, believed that what we create with our imagination is greater than what is around us. It is as simple as that. The solution is to realize the mis-use of our imaginations and become living words, words that respect this world around us. We can use words to investigate this travesty of life, as this present system, and remove the veil of our separation into this busy work composed of limited values, made huge, and step into what has always been here, right in front of us, this manifestation of creation, a symbiotic and functional creation that reveals itself with the potential of a balance that can flow with ease and grace. This is the real nature of life, and it is always here.

An exanple is using our tongues. We can taste bitter, we can taste sour, we can taste something savory, or tart. These flavors reveal qualities. Something that is sour is usually more acidic. We can then investigate what acids do and how they work. The information is here, as we are in the age of information.  if we place a piece of copper in water and let it sit, we can then drink the water and realize a slight taste of copper. We can rub a piece of garlic on the soles of out feet and sense a taste of garlic on our tongues.  This is natural, and yet it has somehow become novel! How did that happen? Obviously, it happened because we allowed something else to overshadow these innate sensibilities. 

As yourself why the media is so ubiquitous? Ask yourself why there are systemic forms that pay doctors incentives to not LOOK HERE? Your capacity to live is go great, that to deny that capacity a film of information that is not the real story must be constantly imposed, and with systemic layers that are not fully disclosed yet must exist somewhere because it can then be construed that we accepted it. In effect, we did, because we dod not investigate. 

Life, by nature, is forgiving, it need only be accepted. This is one’s self. Either that self continues within a false use of the imagination or makes the choice to stand with steadfastness to redefine one’s presence back into all things, which includes the physical world.  How does one cause chaos? Through creating a belief in another world, with a god, to separate one from the real ‘ god’ which is this creation, this physical reality, this means to understand life, to sense it, to taste the nature of it and how it works in balance, in ways that do no harm and consider all things, taking that which is good. 

If these incentives for vaccinating children were removed, ( and our health insurance payments lowered- thereby freeing up our individual economies to have a greater ability to choose!) what would happen with the whole vaccine debate? Would greater numbers of doctors stand in understanding what is happening or not happening? Do we have the courage to ask doctors about these payments? Do we have the courage to face the storm of what is emotional resistance, that we all know very well, which is a persona of irritation and anger and name calling and blame? Can we realize in a moment, were we to ask questions directly in a doctor’s office that reactive behaviors towards such questions are a form of protection and defense in self interest? Can we stand without reaction ourselves and realize that what we face is a construct of misinformation cluttered with a limited set body of information causing a dissonance from practical reality? Can we step beyond our fears of being defined as being ‘ difficult’ and remain with making a statement that we need to investigate what is offered by this system without taking threats and name calling personally? It really only takes one time to not give in, after that it gets easier. We can do this, we can stand. Together. This is the real power, the web of men making the choice to relate words to real life, this life around us, and no longer accepting a limited story that has an outcome of separating us from life, from reality - so visible in a loss of a natural spatial ability, and an ability to taste the sweet and the sour, the bitter and the savory. Why not forgive the chaos of limitation and become what is natural?

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/270216046372259268/

Day 478 A hangover as data of knowledge and inFORMation.

I have been writing every day, but unable to post. Somehow the words just don’t fit what I want to say. 

I have had so much knowledge and information passing by that it all seems to be the same to me, the same limitations, the same wars, the same things being said again and again.

When I go to take a test that I am prepared for, I am calm.  I just walk it, do it. 

But, right now it is like I am at war with myself. Like I keep wanting to react, in short bursts of rapid gun fire, but I have to pull myself back. Like, NO! and then in a more gentle voice, come back, like that reaction serves no purpose.

It is an idea based on no real thing and as such is devoid of purpose. Lack of purpose misses the mark, and as such becomes frustration. Frustration is simply not being here, right here, equal and one in common sense to what is here. So used to racing that this can be missed.

In may ways it is like having a hangover. I feel like I am in a state where I want this hangover out of me, I want it gone, it is heavy, it is so tricky, so clingy. I find myself suddenly imagining something, usually a gloom and doom scenario, and or suddenly a magical fairy tale that appears to promise something. I realize this is more dream than reality. And yet underneath it all, there is what we all want, and that is to get along with one another, to actually enjoy one another. This happening in a state of ease, a state of calm, like when one is ready to take a test, and even looks forward to it. 

In so many ways this should be what happens as we as men enter this earth, a looking forward to understanding this actual real physical world. 

And yet, what happens to us? We become combatants in a war zone. It is the consequence of hierarchy, the consequence of judgement, the consequence of measuring one thing against another without looking at what is the same, which is the breath of life, the movement that is creation. And that creation is like an eternal ocean underneath all of it, so huge, so willing to just be. Instead we are all moving within very limited, selected popisms, pop ups as ideas, as pictures, as skips in sequences of what is real in total. And there is a machine within us, that holds this, as wired as any television set. It is just that we are so consumed by the imagery that we cannot see the mechanisms of it.  And we keep looking with the mechanism, instead of looking at the physical. I mean, why is the anecdotal considered insubstantial? Why is data considered to hold more value? And why is data now considered private?

Data is now being moved into any number of justification : trade secrets, privacy laws,  professional requirements to be able to decipher ( which means properly programmed to the limitation). All of this means that each of us has an innate capacity to realize the limitations being the justifications for choices made as the forms of description ( encryption)  filed away to support the directives based on an idea. This is each of us supporting this, we are the web accepting the limitations, the beliefs, the manipulations, despite the evidence of the harm anecdotally all around us. 

One example of how we take parts to justify a means is a recent vaccine justification I heard.

The doctor, supposed doctor, said that polio is breaking out in Syria, and then relates this to vaccines in general, saying we need vaccines in America. THis a movement from one point to a collective point within this platform of vaccines in total. Tying all to one. Also, taking a war torn country, where the infrastructure has been droned to rubble, thus all water and shelter is severely diminished causing a lack of basic human physical needs, which lead to disease. So to compare, as in pointing out only that polio is appearing in Syria within the state of Syria without clarifying this, and as this relating this to justify a need in America makes no sense, even if it were true, the basis of this. THis is misinformation, it builds no understanding of the total picture, and as such this is a limited story presented to justify an end, and force that end on others, using a threat that is not disclosed, presupposing an outcome without any real investigation. I can see here where this can become a spin, a snake eating its own tail, if we allow it.  In essence this is using a war zone, an extreme to determine a mean to be imposed on all equally. That is just criminal.

In another way, this is using taxpayer dollars to create an extreme environment and then to use the consequences to decide that what counters the disease in such a situation needs to be given to all, just in case such comes out way. This is fear mongering. THis is what if? And all the while, what is causing the disease, self created, is not looked at. How the environment on which we live as this physical earth, when shredded, causes all manner of a diseased life. 

THis is running after consequence of destruction, ignoring the act that caused the dis-ease and deciding that the bandaids are a solution.

And this is also done by not clarifying the sequences. For example, the whole vaccine debate revolves around word play, parents believe that vaccines are causing Autism. The industry and our so called administrations are saying that vaccines do not cause autism. ( meanwhile “ royalities/revenues are all tied into this, like the music industry asking rap to sing words that impulse criminality to fill prisons and if they do not, then the prisons won’t be filled and their investments will not make them any money - which over all must be a configuration done internally because a few own everything, they own the puzzle pieces and can move them in ways that enslave, meaning it is all bullshit and criminal over all)  Here a step has been skipped, a detail not mentioned. It is that vaccines cause inflammation of the brain and this leads to Autism, which as I understand is accepted by the government/taxpayer revenue - who, monetarily,  carry the ill effects of vaccines. The industry  reaps the profits, to then have the means to manipulate the pieces of what builds revenue to force outcomes in self interest( the one wanting the impulsing “ rap” to create revenue from prisons). The walls of the castle hide behind detail not being mentioned to maintain inequality, which again, leads to the hiding of data. And the need to hide this, means that we are all capable of understanding here, this actual physical world. Use “ speed” to hide this, as in “ not having the time” and the villian cannot be pinned down. So word play and timing are used to hide reality.

Another aspect within the timing, is in education. It is known that to master something, such a music skill, takes about 10,000 hours. If schools divide this time, and ensure such number of ours as direct interaction are not met than skills are not moved into a level of mastery. And as we can see, if we have mot mastered words, then we cannot catch the manipulations of ourselves within beyond the 1. the amount of limited story impulsed, and 2. the use of words to hide and limit disclosure, and all the laws built around the maintenance of this. I mean it is known that giving children an hour of recess will improve the overall child’s ability, because within recess, there is a direct interaction with words being used, and perceptions being lived out, exposing a child to a broader range of movement and thus developing depth perception.

I mean the instances I site above reveal the importance of the physical above and beyond and data, information touted through media and those educated to the programming that is voiced in maintaining the status quo of inequality and paychecks. 

We are abdicating our compassion towards physical existence. We are abdicating our community, as humans, as men, to be impassioned with and as ourselves as physical beings, here. Such a subtle difference causing a massive disconnect. But this shows the way out of this mess. That we all realize the capacity of ourselves as life to understand life. And that what we have allowed as mind is the dominance of idea in separation from practical physical reality. THis is why the physical is the gift of life, because it is stable, it is here, more real than any ideological heaven. Thus, the physical is for the human to self realize through becoming equal to what is creation manifest within what works and does no harm and physical interplay of sound into form and thus the joy of expression.

The solution is to give everyone a Living Income Guarantee. To ensure that all have a basic income to support themselves as physical beings. This will allow all of us to slow down for a moment and really look at what we are doing. Even if we all remain where we are, to keep the system going for a moment, the relieving of economic stress will open up our innate spatial capacity to see what we have done, to forgive this, and to realize step by step how to reorder all of this into a system that respect all life, and does what causes no harm. A Living Income Guarantee will remove the speeding time frame that is part of what is used to cause a cognitive dissonance of misinformation, that is composed of limited disclosure, this all being a legerdemain, a slight of hand. And this is created by how each of us move as mind within. If we had economic stability, we would realize this in short order. It is that simple.

Day 119 The solution is an Equal Money System

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that there is some one person, some god, some”entity” out there some where that is going to come and solve all my problems which are actually just self inflicted and imposed through the acceptance and allowance of a debt based system where money is given value as what determines who lives and who dies by the hands of a few.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that the present system exists through the acceptance and allowance of the collective, where responsibility has been given to systems that are controlled by a few, as this has been accepted and allowed by the collective, and thus I as myself have no awareness of what and who I am, as I have allowed myself to be indebted through money printed by a few at their own discretion, where the amount of money within the system can be pulled out to force loss and thus gain for the few, where the desire for control by the few characters whose character is a desire for power and power alone and thus can no longer see, realize and understand that the value is life, as they are possessed and obsessed with power.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that interest lending is a game of monopoly, where the outcome is as the name suggests, the mono against the poly, where the end game is for the mono to force their means and ways of control as a sport in and as a belief that they must compete for power, to become more than another, when the real “more “ is the value of life as what is real and equal in each and every one of us, within this, this real value that is life, the earth provides and gives freely as this earth is the gift of life and thus exists without signature of ownership, as what is value is life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that in creating a system of economic enslavement, as debt, controlled by a few, the same few who sign their names to what is here - an illusion we all accept and allow- the collective are allowing and accepting a monopoly where the mono/few will direct the poly/many and thus will I have abdicated my self as life to the one, and not realized the gift of life as myself as life here, one and equal to all that exists.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that the gift of life is here in and as the physical, the substance of life, giving myself the ability to realize myself as life, as being one and equal to all that is here, where there is no ascension coming to some other planet, no rescuing angel coming to take me away to some supposed greater existence, as what is real is life, here in and as the physical world here, a gift, as the value as what is real, where the only real supposed “ascension” is to become life, right here, in realizing that I am a being in a human physical body, a tool to realize myself as life, this gift given in and as this physical world, as I am a creator as life, yet I have handed this over in and as an abdication of myself as life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that my self as the mind is my separation and my fear in standing up and taking responsibility as my self as life, the gift that need not be feared as it is life, here.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the system of debt is what I have done within and as myself as life, where I have given myself over to a directive, a shadow, an image, an idea that is self created, that is a reflection of my fear where I allow and exist indentured to a secondary directive instead of being one and equal to myself as life here, as this is what I am, as this is what supports all, as what is here cannot exist without itself as life, thus I am abdicating myself as life, and allowing and accepting a system of more than and less than, in and as money, as I have allowed myself to judge myself as being more than and less than in abdicating myself as life, as what is the substance of myself here.

I forgive myself for not seeing, realizing and understanding, through breathing, to stop within and as myself and to see how the mind is like a spinning picture/feeling/recording movie/book of images and past memories of what I have judged as not one and equal to me as life here, not realizing that what I am as mind, as this spinning halo of stories, is my separation and thus un-acceptance of myself as life, myself denying myself as life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that in common sense life would gift life, as that is the value.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I as the human have accepted and allowed the abuse that exists to animal, plant and earth as I can no longer sense the life that is here, as all I have become is a broken record of my fears in abdication of myself as life, in and as what the mind consists and exists as through the projection of thoughts, emotions and feelings, where i have not actually stopped and looked in common sense of what is physically here and have instead allowed and accepted systems to define myself here, and the definition as what is on this earth is unacceptable, as all it is is the very manifestation of the human abdicating itself as life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that all the me=more-ies are myself wanting to be more, wanting to actually be life, yet I have allowed myself to be directed through separation and not realize that I am life and thus I am able to be self directed in and as, one and equal to, this physical world.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I have lost my ability to actually see, realize and understand this physical world and only exist in and as fear for my own survival where I am accepting and allowing a system that cares only for profit and not life, in and as money determining who lives and who dies.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that there are many people standing up and realizing this system of inequality, and enslavement, there are soldiers who will not shoot, the are health practitioners who realize that vaccines are in fact not about health, there are ex money traders where I live who have personally told me that the money system was all about making as much money as possible without any consideration for life, there are local fire departments sending out letters asking for a fireman;s relief fund where it is not realized that in sending out letters to the people, they are in fact stating that the systems that exist are not supporting life, yet what is believed within this is that this entity as the fireman, must just support themselves, not realizing and understanding, standing back and looking at the whole, and asking the question as to why they must ask the people outside of the system for financial support as being a clear indication that this system is in fact NOT supporting life, where even the firemen realize that a widow of a fireman lost in a fire, is in fact life an therefor needs to be supported, where the solution is to stand for a system that in fact takes what is here, and organizes it to be what it is, life supporting life and not something that can be owned by a few to make themselves me-more-I-es, an illusion that is in separation from what is one and equal within and as all of us here, as life , the value.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that stepping out of my accepted and allowed thought structures will cause a sense of fear, as I deconstruct the limitations as what I have accepted and allowed to be what is real, that this will seem like I am falling and thus I will react in fear, will have a feeling - which I will believe to be real- that something about changing myself is somehow “not right” when all it is is that I am having to reconstruct myself and consider my own accepted and allowed  beliefs, opinions and ideas, where I was taught these  ideas, beliefs and opinions by those who came before me, those who also grew up within a system of inequality and self abdication in and as life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that when I am in fear, I am within friction in and as my human physical body, as this is myself in separation of myself as life, as separation from life would create a feeling of friction, as separation, as it is not whole, as self as life is one and equal to what it is that is the substance of what is here that is the support as what we are in fact, life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand the common sense of this.

I commit myself to breathing, to seeing, realizing and understanding that I am life, and my mind , as the memories in and as my past were developed as what i am, as images, within a system of inequality to life, and thus I have never known myself as life, yet I can see that something has been lost as I age and find it harder to remember things, harder to move my human physical body, as what I have accepted and allowed as the personality and character in and as myself is my survival suit within a system that does not develop myself as life, one and equal as what I am in fact, thus must I decompose what I have accepted and allowed and reform myself as what I am, one and equal to myself as this human physical body, bring myself back from all the separated parts as myself as character and realign myself to what is real, this physical world which is life, where the opposite of ascension - so to speak - must take place, I must descend back into the physical to birth myself as life, to accept this gift of life, this physical world, the one thing being controlled is the thing that is what is real, that is the value, that is life, that is the gift, here.

I commit myself to realizing myself here as life, to bring myself back to what is real, this physical world, and to realize that there is no ascension, that the gift is here, right in front of me, where a system of inequality would promote an idea that life is somewhere else, as this allows control and that will create a separation and thus a mono and a poly, where a few have comfort and the poly struggle to survive.

I commit myself to seeing, realizing and understanding that the entertainment presented by the mono is not interested in myself discovering myself as life, even though it is obvious as nothing cannot exist without life and that what entertainment shows is what I am accepting and allowing myself to spin around within and as , as the very separations I accept and allow, as though I am trying to validate my own separations, and as they are not real, I need a constant “fix” of them to keep them going and thus I am never at ease, one and equal as myself here, as what i am which is life.

I commit myself to realizing that the health care system is not about health, as this would end the game of the mono and the poly.

I commit myself to realizing that the present education system is not about developing awareness of this physical world as this would end the game of the mono and the poly.

I commit myself to see, realize and understand that small collectives of like activity, such as the fireman’s relief fund, though supportive of life, will not end and solve the problems of no support, as they are not standing up and looking at the totality of the system and the nature of the system of debt and economic slavery ( this that needs those to fall off the board to maintain a fear of loss to keep the rest from changing) and realize that it is this system of money that is what does not support life here and thus must be what is changed, and that sending out letters begging for support is in the interest of a select few and will not solve the problem, and does not consider others who are in similar situations where they have no support, thus to ask the individuals within the community for support as a small entity, is not supportive of life and will not change what needs to be changed which is this system in totality.

I commit myself to supporting a change to a system of equality, as an equal money system, where no letters need to be sent out begging for money for survival on and earth of plenty, as an Equal Money System.

Equal Money System stand up and vote and support life as this is the value