Using distraction. Day 802

I see statements about the state coming up in my world on a local level and within the internet world. It is interesting how patterns begin to emerge in the flow of information. In my world when a question is asked that appears to not have an answer there is deferment to the state. It is the state this and the state that coming forward as a math as a response. Yet, what is the state? What is this determiner? Of what is this “ state “ composed? The state is composed of people. 

For example, if a school committee member defers to the state, to whom are they deferring? They are deferring to other people. It is actually a way to not take responsibility, especially in the state of Massachusetts because the first statement in the state statutes ( state of beingness can it be distracted into limited information?) is that the people can do what they believe is best. This means that the state is there, as a guideline, but it is not what the people must follow. The rule is given that the people follow what is best, even when it moves against accepting something offered by the state ( people who are not in one’s immediate environment).  It is a construct that must allow choice, because ultimately each is responsible for their actions, and each one’s actions must be in consideration of all things. And, each one’s actions have choice. So, no matter what, what one chooses cannot be the fault of another, even what is offered by the state. If one chooses what is offered by the state it is the fault of the person making the choice, because the guiding and first principle is to choose what is best, no matter what. This allows the state to turn around and say, “ but you choose it, no one forced you to choose it - that is made clear in the state constitution.” 

This is why a state income tax cannot be allowed, because it allows money to flow to a body of people who then determine from a distance what may be something to use, but may not be what is best for the local environments, because environments can have subtle biologically configured differences. And the “ state” - that body of people forming things - is not there on the ground in reality. They are more in ideological pictures about something, which is never the real thing. I see this on a local level. My own conservation person has not come out to the field in my direct experience. She had no idea that moss growing on a stem indicates a high water mark. She looks at a field and has no idea about that. She cannot read the environment, yet this conservation person takes courses at the taxpayers expense, to learn how to do paper work. This conservation person is learning the construct of the state, one that has no real practice in reality. 

I also understand this from locals. The state supposedly monitors local species. Local people, local human bodies, out on the flats, working every day for years, have noticed that they have never seen a “ state” person monitoring the local wildlife. When they called the state about it, the state person, as the story was told to me, came back with the response of “ they monitor at night.”  How does that make any sense? I get a sense that each person, each body in a position is more terrified of losing their job than opening what does not make sense. This is not a presence of choosing what does no harm and considers all things. And perhaps it is why there are fewer horseshoe crabs. Everyone is so locked in their “ jobs” with a response that it is the “ state” that the symbiotic fabric of the living reality around us is placed second, which is a spiting of life, because the real “ box” of information is the natural and physical environment around us. What has happened with all the boxes we accept, of which our inter-net of information flow is and does, is not in synch with reality, with the living breathing fabric of life that is what and who we really are as men. 

Last night I met a woman who realized this over the course of her life. She had worked for a government entity as a tax person. She had sat, in her words, and moved paper work around most of her adult life. She said it got to the point where her body was falling apart, and she had to quit or she was only going to get sicker. She had used her natural capacity to sense much more dimensions of physical realty, on ONLY processing symbols forming ideas about things, but never being the real living thing, all day, day in and day out. This is a mis-use of the physical capacity of men. I have seen this in the schools here as well. It is difficult to find aids for some of the special needs students, with consistency, because sitting and redirecting and redirecting and redirecting a child that is a consequence of this distraction from real capacity, that then needs another person to direct them in their resonant chaos, is also a difficult thing for any sentient multi sensory living breathing physical body to do. It is similar to placing an animal in a cage. It is placing a sentient animal in a cage. It is unacceptable. And for what? So someone can play being superior, based on an idea of “ my INFORMation is more than your INFORMation”?  If we humans realize we can become distracted into focusing on very limited set bodies of information ONLY, without cross referencing the physical reality, of which we are the most perfect of forms to be and do, it will cause dis-ease and our bodies will rebel, and we will lose a sense of reality.  And, it is the most perfect means of control. Yet, we cannot blame anyone, because we allow it when we participate in it. When we believe that the state is an authority, the real authority is our ability to sense what is best, as what does no harm. Being present enough to slow down and choose what does no harm, none, is something each and everyone of us can do. 

If we look, we can realize that one of the first boxes of information flow, was probably rituals done with flying feathers and waving bones around a fire. Then perhaps traveling story tellers, those dishing out stories with dramatic flare of knights protecting the castle which is already a state of loss, and perhaps the initial development of the “ state” we were allowing. Then, that grew into a greater technology as a cathedral, with colored stain-class windows, and music, and robed men in richly colored fabrics, with shiny bits of gold, all polished up, and dialogues that held a truth, and yet were of exciting stories of seemingly magical abilities ( ourselves telling ourselves what we had lost? ). Today, we have public schools, and television. We have become masters of mis-information from a box, from a closed environment in separation from the living physical reality around us. And yet, we still defer to a “ state.” Interesting that the word is the word “ state.” This is so appropriate! We are in a hypnotic “ STATE.” Our words reveal us to ourselves. We always know what we are doing. Yet, the shield of illusion has become a norm, and is a comfort zone, one that is not bringing out our real haptic ability, that place where we would be most happy. Words as sounds are an incredible tool, yet they are so easily manipulated.  Our words are not in synch with our self-honesty, our natural sentient natures. This begs the question as to whether one programmed by the elephant in the room ( hyperinflation as a means of distraction that is what value judgement is and does, polarizing sight ) as stories of information, would in thought, word and deed, be out of synch with reality, and find an inability to answer to certain questions, to the extent that there is deferment to the state? This place is the border of one’s awareness, an inner resonant script that should one step beyond that, and deconstruct, one would feel like a kind of death were happening with accompanying feelings within the various and already-drawn-out stages of grief, which is a lack of vocabulary, or proper use of sound, that would move into defense, or resistance, and fear, because the boundaries of the inFORMation had reached a limit and that state of being is so habituated that a sense of realizing all things, appears to be a loss, when it is the opposite. All of one’s words no longer fit, as they are mis-aligned into a false construct one could call a limited morality.  If one moves into a verbal configuration of blame, one is in that state of grief of and as anger, because one is angry at one’s self, because one’s self does not want it exposed that one was not paying attention.This is a state of fear, which if we look has a quality of slow motion, of thick soup, of vertigo, of great resistance, of a lack of presence, which is a form of improper use of a tool and yet, a gift to show us where we have lost touch with understanding. And, just as the cycles of grief,  next stage is a form of self pity, or dejection, or giving up. So many times, there are humans that get to this stage of giving up and find themselves in a state of nothing. A place where there is silence. And, here, there are those who suddenly realize, that change as possibility exists. It is that place where absolute potential exists, that realization that we create our lives. Therefor our  “ state” is only an illusion as a body of humans doing the same the rest of us are doing and that it is only information that is being manipulated, and that the real box, the real information is the physical reality. And yes, it is never all bad. Yet, when the state begins to move in protection of itself, it can no longer be accepted and must change, in this the state is only a reflection of ourselves within. Also, it means that people on the ground must restore what is natural which is common sense. It is always there, one’s words are simply not in synch with it, yet it is there as it is the essence of self as life. 

It is your responsibility Humpty Dumpty, to realize the wall of separation is done with a discipline of mis-aligned information, of and as limitation, of and as an ignorance, a lack of real focus on the living physical reality around us, in plain sight and that which one is accepting of or not and instead rather a form of distraction that is of limited resonant information. The human body is the most perfect of technologies to read, and then to reed the music of and as life, to be in synch with creation.  Falling off the wall, is realizing, metaphorically, that the wall was not what was of real self support, as it was a false construct, and that when one hits the ground, one realizes how scattered one is within, and yet, that the fabric of life allows the pieces to remain, to be realigned to that which focuses one back onto the forest in awareness of all the trees. The tree, being what orders the physical reality to flow nutrients and water to reach all parts of this reality to maintain a balance that allows greater understanding of who and what we are as life manifest, which is physical.  The real and primary information.  Deferring to a state, as a thought, word and consequential actions as deeds, without cross reference to this living, breathing, physical reality is a state of resonant separation.  One was born with presence, with a natural absorbent ability, that allowed one to learn to crawl and to walk and to talk, without micro-management, before a distractive use of sound as language and pictures from a box that can be manipulated, programmed a resonant story of partial truths, that are a form of limitation, separating one into a consciousness composed of resonant pictures and words, that have a tension of uncertainty, as fear, which causes a state of stagnation, because one is like a child in a classroom who feels they are in a foreign country because they have no real reference within the language painting pictures ABOUT reality, to the extent they move into fear as they are not grounded in reality. That child, so much wants to participate in life, because that child is life before a resonant set body of information informed the child in separation from reality. And this to the extent, that a child cannot read the environment and take a moment to UNDERSTAND that the moss on the stem of a plant indicates how water gathers and collects, and seeps away, in this one particular area, of which a story is left behind, as that moss growing on that stem, indicating a high water mark. This is the living reality, telling a story of and as how things really work, of which a paper world is a STATE of separation. 

Real happiness is a state of full employment of the senses that is the self as a living being, that sentience that is that absorbent ability, that has the capacity as presence to read the environment that is the real story of creation. It is in plain sight.  The boxes on the landscape are a form of distraction from that natural presence. Nothing is all bad, and these boxes of information flow are not something to fear, they do move into details at times that is also important, though it is a mis-use of focus.  Even distraction as refocus can be used as a means of practicing the difference between being focused on a resonant construct and the living reality. And even here, in ways that use distraction to rebuild, to refocus and purify using words, those smallest of notes that delineate with specificity. 

It is time to get the very sounds you make as the words you speak, in synch with your presence, and to focus on the living physical reality in plain sight, and to realize the constructs of a state of separation that one is not required to follow as the real law, the real mandate, that must always be given into a state of realizing that a group of people can do whatever they want as long as it causes no harm and is what is best for all.  This is even in the American constitution, that men must sometimes rebuild because what has been built is not in synch with the best use of freely given resources to ensure the fundamental basic needs to the living machine are in effective order to do what we can all do so well if we look, which is to understand how the physical reality is a symbiotic reality of many parts moving in tandem to express what lends real creation of and as things that can withstand the test of time, and express in  balanced and sustainable harmonic practices, which is being in respect of the physical reality, as this is life manifest. 

Progressive separation Day 776

A sense of rushing, where rushing is racing towards something. Rushing to where, for what, when I am here. Why would there be any where but here? Then one becomes tired of the rushing, rush -hing rustle hinge, What is the sound, how colored is this sound with hindrance’s of my own acceptance and allowance, interference with direct seeing. 

Am I  by nature someone who rushes? or do I by nature process? remaining here? Sound creates things, some eternal, some by nature lacking in longevity. This must be tangible, just as a tree is tangible, yet of form, present. 

It is within and as presence, as in placing myself into a sense of realizing the whole, as the physical around me, without effort, or drive, as a form of projection, that I can hear, that I can listen, as list, the colored movings and undulations of value judgements that have no real focus here- as presence of the physical.  What is a piece of music after all? And what does it really mean to know a piece of music so well one can, like a hologram, see the whole in each part. if one hears one tiny part, one recognizes the piece. I have had this happen with songs I have performed, as a tiny part coming forward on a radio- for example. Practical. We are the means to absorb, as that is the means to learn, to understand. What is the proverbial “ eye of the needle.’? It is all practical after all. 

This appears novel, because for so long my habit has been to move in protection and defense, with imaginations of doom and gloom,  within a belief that I must survive that what is missed is in plain sight  as the physical here. That sound warping as fear can invert one’s focus. Again, practical. 

I have to breath in the form and shape of the physical, as a thing, of space and form, around me, realize my ideas about it, self projected and what it is that I have allowed to define me, that has protected what is natural, which is to be present here.  In a way, at this point it is to realize I can realize this reality as forms and movements, as shapes and things, just as I do within my own accepted lack of presence, into energy, a personification of limited values creating a glitch from reality that places me into a bubble of separation where a busy work of comparison based on ideas, is a mis-use of and as who and what I am, as the living word and respectful word of  and towards creation, it is indeed, a balance. My lower back and the physical hyper imposed tensions, show me where I disconnect from reality, as reality being the inclusion of all things presence and separated - yet still here. Still means visible. 

If I look at every person, each is unique, when I am in a situation with other people, or even animals. I recognize this, as do we all. I also realize I can focus on the cultural manners- those things that I call out, defining a person, as their names, their manners, the way they dress etc. I can focus on that ONLY, and avoid looking at what is unique about them. I have to ask myself if focusing on what is unique causes me to move into fear. It would do such, as what is unique does not follow the limited patterns of cultural definitions, as rituals based  on‘ ancient’ environmental practices as ordering of this reality. It is easier to ONLY look at the accepted and allowed divisions, instead of realizing the uniqueness in all things, as that which is unique demands more definition, which means I must realize my own ignorance of all things, as this reality.

I would have to realize that there are 22,000 children dying each day. Which means I would have to question the very order of the world around me, as all the roles composing the order of this world in regard to whether that order was doing everything possible to realize its own order in relation to cause and effect on the greater stage of this physical reality. This would mean looking here, being present in everything around us, which would mean expanding one’s awareness to more than one’s self interest. It would mean ending the game of blame and spite, emitting from the self. It would mean calling this out, and asking someone, for example, ‘ What if this were you, as you are of the same stuff, physically, as all the rest on this planet.” 

How was such ignorance accepted and allowed? 

It was created by the self.  It was allowed by the self, and it is the means of a narrow focus, into a lesser state of being, called polarizing matter ( which validates matter as what is real) , a divided focus into not being who and what one is, as living self responsibility in common sense of practical living reality. 

Within this, what I can practice, is to be here, to hear, to listen, to speak up. To use who and what I am to hear without fear of calling things out by name. When things are called out by name, they are made real-eized for what they are, and reality comes rushing forward, in balance. Thus, the power of living words, is to call things by name, and inflate a metaphysical construct of techno-colored inflamed value judgments that are missing a focus in this practical physical reality. 

We cannot know a tiger in a zoo. We all know this. Therefor, to substantiate what is real, we have to LOOK at the physical and stop being zombies walking around in bubbles of value judgements. The media, only reflects what we are allowing within ourselves. 

The battle to inform who and what we are. It only has the power we give it.

Day 331 Fathers killing sons is the product of a sequestration of POWER.

http://bigstory.ap.org/article/police-phoenix-area-man-killed-wife-over-hiv-fear

A man, a father killed his wife and his son. His son, living at home, 27 years old. His son a product of a consumerist market that has created a toy, a video game, a bubble of war perpetually played. This boy became the trash of this existence, a life never lived, instead a by-product of a system where a few have power and train the children to serve the needs of that power, and thus, as their state of being is solely focused on war and profit and gain in self interest before life, they design, or allow the design of products that are in the likeness and self interest of this gain, without any regard for life, for children or the people, the plants and the animals on this earth from which the gain, as freely given resource , serves the benefit of a few. This boy spending all his time playing video games in a system that is cutting jobs, taking away what supports those who do not have jobs, and or those who have worked their whole lives.
This is a system where followers are developed, thus we are not taught to direct ourselves in common sense of what is for the common good. Our behaviors are to follow, to sit complacently and play video games, to have a media system tell us what is going on. Meanwhile the rug is being pulled out from under our feet. This earth is falling apart and we, the human choose not to stand as the power, the real power that we are, the being of ourselves as life. This self that can be trained to sit and play video games all day. And this is because we have abdicated out power as ourselves as life, and when we do begin to realize that something is not working with this system, we believe that protest andquestioning of what controls this system will somehow solve what exists. but the disease of power has grown so huge that it would actually create a product that creates children that become autistic, that at 27 years of age have no other self direction but to play video games. The video games are great training for future drone operators, and given the video released by someone who is a traitor to the power maniacs but in actual real life, a person who cares for life, the behavior of the soldiers in that video in that helicopter, they no longer have any sense of reality, those were simply people walking on the ground, there were no weapons in their hands, and it is pretty obvious.
Humans must turn and look at this earth and ourselves as people, there are so many of us, and by our sheer numbers we can stand, so many, so capable, each spending but little to support a group to stand and place a system on this earth that supports life, supports what is best for all, supports what gives all a life of dignity, supports what allows children to stand in support of themselves. A system that requires all to vote and that educates instead of indoctrinates, I mean what system that cared for life would create a video game of war and then imprison a person standing up for life?
Asking such a system to change will do nothing, protesting is what one has been taught to do. Protesting and occupying destructive practices done by corporations that have no care for this earth is not going to do anything, you are controlled if such is what you believe. You are as controlled as that child, who at 27 is addicted to video games. In some ways the children see the mess of this world, and thus can you blame them when they decide to lose themselves in fantasy when the adults around them are all angry and frustrated and economically enslaved and lost in protest, a giant rant instead of realizing that it takes standing up and becoming the change, establishing a new system, a simple system that takes what is here and uses it to take care of all life, to give what is needed to survive, to remove the stress of paying for a life freely given, where the dictates of this system only teach illusion, instead of teaching understanding and self direction within working with what is physically here?
Advertising is so successful because it uses an understanding that the human can be embedded resonantly, an understanding that we humans are trainable entities, an understanding that what goes in is what comes out. Thus within a profit based system where money determines life, a few can create a whole structure that presents words of “goodness” and yet send outs products that focus the human within limited insight away from practical common sense of the actual physical world and how it functions.
We have this tool of communication called television, but within a system of inequality the space of this communication can be bought and filled with the voice of the forked tongue, where incomplete sentences are spoken, information that sounds good, yet lies by omission, not telling the whole story, not showing all consequence. And we have educational systems dictated to by this same system, thus why are our children not learning to read, to speak, and thus to communicate? Why are our fathers, grown men, unable to understand and clear up their own frustrations and getting to the point where they react and kill their wives and their children?
What is happening is not a sequestration, this in itself as how it is presented and incomplete sentence, a lie by omission, what is really happening is a sequestration of power for a few in as bad a state as that child, as that father, locked in a disease of power and control of earth, blind to what is real and the value that is life. Those in power have no sense of themselves as life, have no control over themselves as life, just as the rest of us have no control, our children and our fathers, Thus, it is for the many as the humans at the bottom of this pyramid of inequality, to stand and to politically use this system to stand and to place a system of equality, to use money to move what is produced in abundance, to all equally, especially since we know how to grow fields of perfect tulips, we can grow what sustains us, what gives us all dignified lives, we can open fields , the ones that surround the CAFOS to the cows and the chickens so that they can live the lives they were designed for, to sequester the carbon into the soils, so the trees and plants can grow and produce oxygen. That owner of the company, is not going to give up his lust, and his illusion that he can own what is here on earth. But the many, people standing up realigning what is here, to understand how we got here, so this never ever happens again, and so we can all realize ourselves as life, here.

Watch the Century of Self to understand how we can be taught/programmed, thus realizing we are trainable and can change.
Watch the Power Principle, to understand the lust for power, the lack of awareness for life such dis-ease causes.
Walk the desteni lite course to self realize what emotions, thoughts and feelings are, to understand the building blocks of what you are. Know that being stuck in memory, as knowledge and information only without practical application is the design of this present system to create a human that follows picture/illusion only,having developed no awareness of the physical world, only having ideas about the physical. An idea is not actual physical direct interaction. Sitting in offices with pieces of paper thinking about how something is ONLY, is not reality. Learning what something is in college without actual physical involvement does not mean one understands, it only means one is able to spew words and fill in the spaces of tests, tests that are written and allowed by the same who control the laws and media, those with the money to buy the space. A system of inequality will, by design, lead to a few having the means to buy the space of here and fill it up with their lust, with their fear. And if we accept and allow this, we are all to blame. Asking this to change is not going to happen, we, the many must stand and BE the change, using the system that is here, and standing within it to change it.

What this system promotes is the hope of a super hero, the exact opposite of what it will take to make change, in obvious contradiction to what is real, many humans on this earth, The wars of gain for a few, using the soldiering feet of many is in direct contradiction to what is promoted by hollywood, the idea of the savior, this that religion also teaches, one person cannot change this world, one person cannot win a war, it takes many. Thus, it takes many to simply stand and organize and support monetarily, a system that will end this sequestration OF POWER ( I want to complete the incomplete sentence here) to turn this structural form on earth to one that supports all life, as life is the value.
Time to get out children away from video games, time to get our children standing on their own two feet directing themselves within working with this physical world and turning our television sets into what leads to an understanding of this world to the extent that we all vote knowing we are supporting life, and doing so with understanding. Can there be any joy greater than this?

A link to a Face Book page of relevant documentaries, here.
Equal Money

Day 253 Imagination Dimension Abdication Character

Imagination Dimension Abdication Character
When teaching children to play the violin, I would notice a change in focus, where self direction and attention were strong, in that things moved with more ease and immediate recognition.
I remember one girl, who was beginning to develop this, it was strong within her. And then in the next lesson she arrived wearing a dainty handbag/purse. I think the strap was a gold colored chain. I knew it was over, I had seen this before. The transition. The girly world had caught her attention, and unless the parents made note of this, she was going to fade and never return. Which is what happened. And it is hard to watch.
It is not that wanting to be a girl is bad, it is that this consumes and other areas are left behind. If it does not fit the picture, as what our society promotes, as personification of women, then it is more than likely left behind. The bling, the seeming enchanting image of the princess, the woman, is taken on with gusto, at the exclusion of all else.
What are our children focusing themselves into and as, within such limited designs? And is the personifications promoted within the figurines, as the very toys of play in childhood the beginning of such limited focus? What is promoted is a boy within war games and financial games, and with women the princess waiting for the knight, even the knight beneath the beast, where continues kindness and compassion and service to the beast will eventually bring out the man, the real man, and then the maiden will be saved. And the journey of putting up with the beast is commended. It seems an abuse coupled with a truth in some way, I mean abuse is abuse, let’s not elaborate it, justify it with with a patience in of supposed “good behavior.”
This is where the principle of oneness and equality comes in. What is best for all is best for all, period. There are no if’s, and’s, or but’s, period.
Spending time respecting anything else is really saying it is okay to follow through with a tantrum in self interest, and the tantrum is not being what is best for all. Any justifications to the contrary need be looked at immediately and simply stopped. Practice makes perfect. Digression is digression is digression. Let’s start calling a spade a spade, and not molly coddle the tantrums of our illusions.
A little girl of twelve or thirteen, suddenly taking the play of dress up out into the world, at the exclusion of everything else is limited. There is no way around this.
And we wonder why our children lack the kind of focus that brings success for all children within learning to use language and simple arithmetic in our schools. Could it be the very way in which what we have made huge, that is limited by design, what we uphold as personifications of self within education and media and family generational character values? These are a focusing onto something, and not the practice of self direction within a purpose that considers all life, and self as the same substance as life, as what is here. This is limited consideration, and even here, not everyone has the financial means to even live out what is the proposal of this monetary system, as what it promotes ( which collectively we all allow), thus presenting the unattainable for many. And what kind of behaviors would this create? Frustration? Dismay? Anger?
And then, ways and means of profiting on this inevitable lack are created. Prisons, where the prisoner of turned into a commodity for someone’s pension and another’s dividend. Instead of looking at the causation, what is looked at is how to profit from the consequence of this lack of development. Remember, let’s call a spade a spade. No tantrum of justification here, no sticky spinning of a spider web of protection against not looking at that spade as being a spade. Unerring humility in remaining steadfast within the principle of what is best for all, in thought, word and deed, with every breath is the only solution. Anything else is an imagination within self abdication, where the self abdication is protection and defense of the limited values learned as what has been accepted and allowed on this earth, as a tantrum of not wanting to look at the fact that a spade is a spade. The behavior of irritation is a behavior of not looking. The behavior of anger is not looking. The behavior of lust is not looking. The behavior of fear is not looking. Looking and focusing on here, moves with ease. Just as these children who had begun to focus from within, which is visible in a movement within playing the violin, with ease, where one small direction given in detail was more often than not immediately grasped, as though the focus was one and the same as an awareness of an ability to see the notes, and the physical body, and the sound being produced. Interesting, that with the very sound it was immediately noticeable how focused the child was.
And if this is visible as what I have noticed, then would not this be true with all people in all situations? And even within this, I am sure I lack awareness as to the extent within which this is possible. But the other way, the handbag on the shoulder ONLY presentation, is limited. It is a copy cat existence serving a profit system that promotes limited personifications to control ownership of the human in self interest. And we are all playing along unless we stop and realize what is best for all is best for self, as self is part of an organism called earth, and thus, would not self, allowed to be what self is as life, then find a place within this organism? I mean, nature is now coming up with super viruses to balance the earth out and rid itself of what is destructive, so this organism knows what is best for itself, and what the human is practicing and allowing on earth is not what is best for this planet. The human is not aware of itself as life, is not focused as itself as life, is not listening, is not looking, is only pretending within a superimposed dream of limited design.
So, within this, within myself, what imaginations have I accepted and allowed to distract the focus of myself here? Where am I not sounding myself clearly as life, where am I in separation from myself as life, where the very sound i make comes out thin and unfocused?
Where is my behavior not clear and steady, here and focused, without fear and doubt?
What commercial bling do I allow to distract me?
What is it within my own desires, wants and needs, are based on beliefs that really do not serve the purpose of what is best for all?
What do I fear in standing in common sense as what is best for all?
And in this day and age on earth, is there any more time to wait patiently for the beast to “get over it” ? No.
Anything that takes self away form focusing on what is here, in common sense is unacceptable.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the thoughts reeling around, in and as my mind, are one and the same as what is promoted through education, media and the limited values within family as survival tactics, where not all are to be seen as good or bad, as some are of a truth yet coupled with ignorance of what is here on earth in totality.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that as within so without, where what reels in and as my mind, is as much a halographic as the halographic images presented within television, media, societal behaviors, educational systemic inability to focus the human into and as being specific and clear within an understanding of self able to focus self as life and direct self as life here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not look in detail as to how the mind works and how the present system on earth functions, to see, realize and understand the structure and form of what has been accepted and allowed by men on this earth, to understand that what is here is a tiered organization of values in separation from what is equal and one, in and as what all existent is as the very substance of, which is life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that emotions and feelings are a construct of accumulated beliefs that originate from a fear of standing as self as life, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have emotions of self pity as I compare myself to what is presented as the “perfect” feminine form, fearing that I will not be able to survive unless I become this, and/or within this , to seek another value to become the support of myself here, such as believing that becoming an intellectual will bring survival success, which I then parade through purchasing my own comfort and security without standing up and realizing that all on this earth is the same as myself and thus why are not all existing within comfort and ease within and as self expression in and as life?
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand how I have abdicated myself as life, into and as thinking only of my own survival without realizing that self interest within my own survival can never be stable, as there can be no stability or real life expression until all life on earth, as a single organism, is stable and supported within and as the value being life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to displace myself into and as limited personifications in oder to survive instead of asking myself the question as to why such projection exist instead of remaining here equal and one with what is physically here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that even within realizing I am play acting in order to survive, the guilt and shame within this, this that i hide and run from, is a separation from directing myself as what is best for all, as self direction as self as life, is this, and exists in and as a state of ease, thus, it is for myself to forgive myself for the “milk I have spilled” as guilt and shame and to stand and become life and to realign myself as life, equal and one, which means existing within and as what is best for all in humility, with no desire for gain and at the moment, a careful common sensical self direction within what is best for all, as at present the current system does not support life, and thus must the current system be stood up within and directed within what is best for all.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand how the mind in fact functions on a quantum level, where the mind takes pictures laced with what is presented, and what is presented serves an agenda in self interested survival only with an ignorance of what is the source and substance of what is here as this physical world, equal and one in all existent which is life, where television commercials distort reality in favor of a limited viewpoint and thus draw attention to an agenda in self interest for the support of a few, where television could be used to bring life, as the human, back to self as life, here, thus it is not what is here as it is how what is here is used in self interest, thus is a limited design presented in ignorance of the totality of life.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that my own guilt and shame within and as fear of standing as myself as life, will take some practice as I have not been taught to move as myself as life , here, having taken on the present limited system of values, and attempted to use this for my own survival, and when it worked I was feeling better than those around me, and when it did not work, I went into self pity, shame, spite and blame, anger and fear, and thus only went from one polarityto another in separation from focusing on what is actually physically here in and as life, as I allowed myself to exist as mind only.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to have realized the halo-graphic spinning of thoughts in and as my mind, as being of limited values, and in paying attention/obeisance to this, I was in fact fearing to stand as myself as life, here, to focus myself in and as life here.
I forgive myself myself for allowing and accepting myself to have feared standing as myself as life, in fear of losing friends, losing family, losing survival - as in having money, losing security and comfort ( which in common sense at the moment, to not realize that not having money means I will be unable to stand within this system to make a change- thus it is to use what i am here within common sense to be directed within and as what is best for all as creating a system that supports all life - so that life can begin), losing some idea of myself as a “face value” only, and within this to see that that which stands the test of time, meaning that which is constant and stable, is myself as life, where the irony is that that which I fear is that which is eternal.

I commit myself to, when and as I sense a heaviness in and as emotion and feeling, to stop and to breath, and to bring myself here, to look at the details of what is physically here, and to direct myself within and as moving within the principle of what is best for all.
I commit myself to , when and as I imagine being criticized as I had been as a child, to stop and to breath, and to see, realize and understand how the mind works, and how this present system of inequality functions, to no longer allow myself to participate within a self destructive belief within an endgame emotion, and to forgive the limitation as such a belief of less than, and to direct myself in common sense of what is physically here.
I commit myself to seeing  , realizing and understanding that within myself within self abdication, I exist within shame based on beliefs and ideas that are a endgame, which is a belief within a fear/survival mind set, as existing within fear/survival all that is seen is death, and thus a lack of understanding of the substance of life, of a real faith in life, where being here equal and one as life means respecting life as the physical, and any and all transformations inherent within and as life, as such transformations would be done in awareness as life would not deny itself awareness, as the nature of life would be full participation and full potential reached, and thus what is here, within destruction of this earth is not life, as suicide is not life, dis-ease is not life, life would expression.
I commit myself to no longer fear the presentation of a judgment, an endgame, a limitation, an aspect made huge, as what I was led to believe as a definition of myself as a child and as a woman, a mother, a widow, as the personalities of my own warped reality, which I accepted and allowed in self abdication as life within a fear/survival system, to see, realize and understand the petrification of life here on earth by men, in thought, word and deed as belief, opinion and idea, in media and education, in gender play and culture formation and to stop and to breath and to stand within the principle of oneness and equality, here, and within this to direct myself within what is best for all.
I commit myself to, when and as I abdicate my self as life into such an allowance of myself as shame, blame or spite, to see, realize and understand in what way, as my thoughts, words and deeds, as direction and reaction, from my self or - as what is me without- to realize what values are made huge within utilizing contextual social values as a support in self interest within what is taught as a means of survival within behavior, to not take it personally, but to realize such self interested within a fear/survival system behavioral teachings/tactics and to take this back to self and realign within and as what is best for all, as this is the choice, the only choice, in and as support of all life in consideration as equal and one to and as myself here to be eternally in support of life, where life is the value, equal and one as what I am.
I commit myself to seeing realizing and understanding that to abdicate myself as life is to allow ideas, opinions and beliefs supporting constructs of more than and less than, as limited values placed in a system where man is a more-than in relation to this earth, where divisions within this separation continue such more- than scenarios, as societal behaviors within class, gender, race, culture, on which taboos of moving beyond proper behaviors are accepted and allowed, to see, realize and understand that many of the reactive fears within and as my imagination journeys of impending doom and gloom have no real basis within and as being able to support all life, consider all life, as life being the value, and that such emotional/feeling storms as a collection of thoughts based on beliefs, opinions and ideas are fearing the survival suit of taught behaviors in separation from life, from equality and oneness in and as life, here, where the mind as an image tool has been used by each individually to hide from facing self as life, and in replication of this inner allowance by men, into and as a system without that repeats what is held as what self believes self is, as personification, as a warped reality of values, divided and separated and limited and them blanketed onto and as all men, accepted and allowed by men, this construct a nature of more than and less than, which is the behavior of mankind on an organism of life, as earth, where man is in total separation from this earth as a manifestation of life, here.

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