Confusion and fear is not enough information Day 765

I sense a weight in my cheat, that slowing becomes more and more defined as what builds and creates this presence within and as me.

The best approach at the moment, and also to solution is to acknowledge this and to stand in the practical as what lends effective movement within and as me. It is, as the best means at the moment, self focused on a lack, as that lack being something impossible to change, and yet, to stand as the change is the means towards the end of this presence as information within and as who and what I am, here.

What I am going to look at today, is how much this weight is a habit of a con-fusion of fear, as not being able to process the spin of value judgements of good and bad, that is myself in a shadow world lost to what is real, as the practical. I cannot respect myself if I allow this, this con-fusion of value judgements protecting an idea of who I am in some belief that I must have a limited set of values to define me. This a consequence of a belief that I am not enough, as perhaps starting as comparison without investigation, without regard for simply being and living as who and what I am, which has great potential to understand life, and experience the many qualities that compose life. This life is physical and all around me as me. 

I must realize that this existence is in a state of lack, which is a state of diminishment, and that what is best is not being lived, or being lived by small degree, as that same life within and as me, that motivates correction is also wanting of correction to experience life. It is balancing out, standing as being here, and realizing the consequences of what I have accepted and allowed means standing up as what respects this world and how a mind consciousness of limited information is the separation from being present in this reality. 

Always in the words are the means and the correction as we tell ourselves as our projections what and who we are standing as. This is always visible in plain sight.

What I am here being and living, is standing as seeing, realizing and understanding acceptances and allowances and the means of seeing this lack and who and what I am, as life, here, which is physical.

Thus, this weight on my chest is the habit of and as the confusion of and as focusing only on a lack creating polarities of good and bad, and the way forward is to acknowledge it and change the focus of myself onto simply being here. This means standing as what is best for all, which is what is best for self. 

I notice, if I slow down and LOOK at what information flows as me, as energy, as a quick movement - in a way- as a storyline, a lot of the imaginations are of doom and gloom, worst case scenarios, fear of punishment and mistake. It is like having a haunting shadow around me as me. This is what accumulates around the top of my chest. I have to catch it, or ‘ read it’ and process it. This means taking it apart and correcting the focus of and as this onto the practical real living actions in tune with this reality, because this is what I am, and this is myself respecting all things. 

Since we are exposed to, so much media and story telling from books ONLY ( written information is not a bad) and our parents and others around us, are of the same, do we really learn to respect the natural world around and do we have examples around us who are able to do this? Perhaps animals can, more than any human. 

If one is reading a text, with information as pictures, as stories, and cannot remember what one has just read, or what someone has just said, and you can’t remember how you made the switch how are you going to read the things that distracted you from remaining present, taking in information with ease? And, do you think you are going to be able to change this in a moment when this was built over time, just like a frog placed in cold water, that when heated over time, say 50 years, or even seven, that when the water finally kills the frog - and the frog not even realizing it is being cooked to death- the people in that environment just stand there, because they believe that hot water to be NORMAL because it is all they have ever known, these people are going to be able to SEE what killed the frog? And, could someone who has continued time and time again to say the water is heating up and will kill the frog, for which all the oblivious people will say, “ conspirator!!!” , lol.  Can something like this not be realized but by deconstructing it, which means increasing one’s processing speeds because this was done through dumbing one down into a slow measure that has no sustainability and rushes like an energetic electrical burn through the body, using the flesh to project the belief that is the mis-information separate from reality? 

Birthing one’s self into real life means standing up again and again until one becomes aware of self and this world, this physical world. This means re-cognizing one’s self to reality. This means stepping out of the bubble of mis-information ( mind con-sciousness) that is a distraction through limited info, causing cognitive dissonance that is really a stagnation. 

It is like, or is, one must stand within one’s self and blow up what is zipped filed, or compressed within one’s self, as what has accumulated into a layered onion, and forgive the value judgement that is fear, and walk the correction, which is a practical application that is a state of being focused here on the physical, in reality. The elite of this world have simply used this that is accepted by the collective, to build a structure that allows them control, which is what a state of separation is constantly trying to be and do. They use our abdication of common sense of reality to do this, thus we cannot blame them. Yet we can change from separation into equality and oneness, with reality. 

What I notice about myself, in relation to this, is that the pressure in my chest, which at this point feels like a film over my chest, on the top of my chest, is a form of anger, which is fear. I notice the habit of becoming angry, in my case it comes out in a verbal form.  This is a form of disempowerment, of my own creation. I look only at the punishment of myself, as suppression, as not being present in reality, doing the real math of common sense as me, in expression. 

When I focus, and ‘ do the math’ or ‘ look at the numbers’ as the measure of what I am allowing myself to be, in relation to the principle of what is best for all as what is the best for me, is that my lower back moves with more ease. Mankind is unhappy when unfocused and happy when they are focused and present in the practical. 

Today, in relation to the present system, someone said to me, “ But that is how nations build their wealth’ This is true, yet if that wealth moves into  supporting conflict for supposed gain, driven by self interest, as a dogma of ideas, and, instead does not flow the means of what  lends stability and growth on every level, a real wealth is not being considered, and only a very limited thing as an idea that is in itself a state of separation from a common sense of the real machine as the physical. 

My physical body reveals what I am doing. If there is pressure on my chest, I am moving into fear and anger over solutions within the principle of what is best for all.  Fear is a practice of protection, which means comparison, which means judgement instead of applied practical discernment. 

What does it mean to really know one's words Day 751

This morning I woke up and went into an imaginative doom and gloom scenario. I caught it and stopped, breathed, and looked at it. It was a presence behind me, I noticed how I leaned slightly forward physically. Then it hit me. It was like a tree of fear, composed of revenge, and worst case scenarios. My deep mind shadow state of being, with a consequence of no real presence and acknowledgement of the living reality around me.

Last night I had interacted with a  group of people. There were a couple who had a lot of ticks, physical kinks in a way. They had a hard time maintaining a consistent eye contact. One started to tell me of a marriage that was at least 34 years ago.  I can remain calm in this, yet I could say that before SF and SC and writing, I would have wanted to run from the room, not realizing what I was seeing, and absorbing it more, like a friction, a resonant friction that was too hard to bear. Myself wanting escape. At present, I have greater stability, and can hear this, and listen to such storms, even within myself and call them out by name, these trees of fear, these veins of fear, of a mis-take of life. All of them a math, as an accumulation of ideas, beliefs and opinions.  What would I be if I had created a tree of life within me, as me? A tree that reciprocated the living physical reality around me? Would I be more in synch with creation? It is not a question of would, it is a question of why I wouldn’t be, as it is common sense. 

It is interesting within the system, as I have just done my taxes. I have been doing them myself for a while. It is interesting to see the machinations of the system as it bullies and forces what feeds a few instead of what is best for all. At this point, if one does not abide by a one-size-fits-all-petro-chemcial based health care, and one opts out for some ‘ religious’ group, as a philosophical exemption has basically been removed behind some closed door, where no one in the state on all the levels seems to take responsibility and only passes it around,  that if one opts out, under the guise of religion, one is also making the choice to opt out of social security- that system of retirement, where the labor of men, collectively pool their digits for their labor into a system for retirement. If one opts out of health insurance, which has the layer of being under some religious belief ( like human fetal cells in vaccines) one also opts out of social security. I bet one must still continue to pay for it, from one’s job. How we cannot see the inherent corruption, the blatant corruption within this construct and stand up, really astounds me.  Also, there must be others that see this, because years ago, a bill was brought into the state senate for the choice of emergency health insurance only, which means that many people in this state worked together to not participate in allopathic medicine. Thus this method, that many are not wanting to participate within, and it is known,  make the choice to use it in extreme emergencies, yet opt out in the long term. What the system has done, that system of supposed care, is brought forward a construct that is being bullied and forced.  This is so corrupt it is astounding that the collective does not stand up and say no. Yet, there are many that must be doing so, because the forcing of this, is in deed a recognition that many are very aware of this. It is also interesting to note, that the CDC is supposedly bringing forward statements that the science behind their choices, is closed. This in itself is astounding. It is the reaction of being placed in a corner, which means that many are, again, in deed, speaking up and questioning what is being accepted for the collective. Unless there is the choice of balance, and no harm then the science is not yet sound. It is as simple as that. If we can understand how to develop a healthy race horse, and know what builds a healthy nutrient dense plant, then we know how we work on a basic level. I mean, we know what elements to pull from the ground to build things. A cook knows the most subtle of things to cook something. A mechanic knows all the parts and the fluids used in an engine. To say we cannot understand the body, the human body, is simply a misnomer. Choosing a belief in a lack in one area, and being common sense in another, breeds questions, and those questions are being asked, as the reaction of protection done with force and limited choices, reflects a push back on what is proposed. This should lend courage to everyone. It is time to be brave with consistency. It is a time to build a tree of real investigation and understanding, as too many children are suffering the consequences. Not to mention the animals and the living environment. 

Overall, my own ‘ tree ‘, accepted and allowed, of fear, of non real substantiation of life, of the practical, is the same. It is a focus on lack, a denial of common sense. The common sense all around me, and around all of us as the physical world. Of course, the solution is to rebuild. It is to build a tree of life within and as me. It is to stand as the practical, to realize the resonant seed of and as me as life. It is to see all the layers that build into what manifests as physical ‘ ticks’ that I could say are suppressions of mis-takes in understanding how all of this works.  It is to realize that the mis-takes, cannot define me unless I allow them, and that I can stand and listen, and recompose, resolving the fears, bringing them into the practical. It is to realize, as many are, that the physical world is abundant with provisions to stabilize the physical, in symbiotic ways,  creating a orchestra of balance as the sound of what does no harm, as this is the sound of creation, and our real ability. It is to forgive the fear, and to stand with what is balanced and substantive. This can be done, with words. We can, because it is what and who we really are, stand and hold the words that build a tree of life. It is our real birthright. What is so awesome is that we are the very means, and design to be and do this, and that this is more natural than the tree of fear, that tree that weighs us down, pulling our chests forward, that very chest, the means to lend compassion and patience and calm, and respect for who and what we really are. 

A musician that has mastered an instrument is understood as ‘ no longer having to think about it’, meaning, one does not hear them thinking. This has a quality of flow to it, such a mastery, I would suppose, is similar in athletics. If someone mastered their words, the same would happen, meaning, one would restore a direct seeing, and voice what was real, without hearing the weight of thinking. It is in a way, as I surmise in this moment,  like using words to describe this world, this living reality, the one in plain sight.  It would be communicating with and as this actual, real, tangible physical world surrounding us, the one producing the air we breath.  In this, words are of course, not that thing they describe, I want to say, in some ways they are a movement of conception, or a fine tuning.  Humans must master the very sounds as words we speak.  I mean, listen to the birds, they appear to me, to be so specific in what they sound.  Is speaking in clarity absent of any forcing, and present in what is a more stable, and eternal, focused sound? Is it more of a playfulness? Need one exist as fear within this state of musing?  Should one not speak for attention and more for bringing forth the beauty of clarity? When one has the opportunity to hear a musician that has mastered an instrument to such a degree that there is no thinking being heard, it is a pleasure, as it is so in tune, so present, it catches all one’s attention, and yet it does not demand attention.  It is also, from my humble experience, a state of greater ease,  because humans are anxious when they are uncertain, and happy when they are present, focused and balanced. Balanced with and towards what? The physical, the living reality in plain sight. 

Thank you for reading! 

Day 690 Changing my own self absorption.

There is a tension in my right arm, this is information, and it is heavy as the information that is me is limited, it does not fit into the physical world, move with here, with ease. I have accepted and allowed ideas, beliefs and opinions to define what is real. I have used my presence to built a construct within, as a memory, as an entity of mis-information to define who and what I am. I have accepted and allowed this to direct me. When I become aggressive, as in pushing and forcing information onto here, as my own measure/experience/culture/background/7 generations/ value judgements I mis-take my ability to be aware of my own constructions within ONLY paying attention to that inner information. I am so involved in my own survival suit/character/personality/self definitions that that which reads that inner information lacks being present in reality as myself and as the physical world.

This inner information moves in a stagnant manner, heavy and resistant to change. It moves more as substantiation of itself than being in consideration of what is real, as the surrounding physical world. The solution is to align that within to the without, through rebuilding that within to equalize to the without as the physical world.

Thus, when I tense up, it is a resistance to change. It is me wanting to force my own insight onto the world around me. This is not necessarily bad, it can be a cool moment of reflection, to assess and investigate what I believe, and build through cross reference that information with the reality around me, meaning to look at all things, for example.  

My ability to sense, can understand the parts and look at the physical world, and continue awareness of the within and the without. I mean, we can go outside and look at the trees, and see, very clearly when they are in abundance or lack through the expression of their foliage. It is right in front of us, and we know the building blocks. 

After all, we know how to take care of a race horse, we know its limits, and we know the needs of that physical body. It is astounding that one practice reveals the means and yet we are so self involved that we lack translating that means into another similar situation.  

And yet, that lack reflects the self absorption  focused within narrow parameters of belief  ' within '  ONLY. The key here is self absorption, which reveals that we absorb, we become what we focus on, and that we can absorb, and that that is our ability to assess and investigate and BUILD within and without. So simple, so evident, so right in front of us. 

The chaos is the separation into believing the information that was not present at birth, or not yet the seven generations of information resounding within, that occupies that ability to absorb into becoming self absorbed. The ability to absorb, is indebted/enslaved to limited information, ubiquitous as what humans have accepted and allowed for eons. The physical the means to ground us back into what is real.

Thus, because I am a product of this system, in every breath, in every moment, it is for me to humble myself, to hear the hum of the physical, to see that which is constant, and to stand with and as that. The real ‘ hum’ is to ground myself into silence, that can here the information of the physical world.  I mean, this would be to hear the grass grow. This is something I cannot even fathom, as I am a product of the present system, and yet, who and what I am as life, can become this with practice. Within this, I can real-eyes that everything that is here, is me, in another form, in another life information, and that I cannot stand without what is here. I am like a cell, a part, and yet, one. This shares the one and the many. This quantifies , much like the fungal network that sustains whole forests of trees. It is an information network in support of the parts and the whole, each part individual and yet one.  Our present military industrial complex is a war in rejection of this, and yet, cannot exist without this. This respect for all things, is how life exists. It is like a self sustaining fabric that by design is oneness and equality. It is the principle of the golden rule, to give as one would receive. It is the mathematical equation of self forgiveness. It is the sound of equality. It is the only choice. It is what I am as what and who I am.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to resist looking here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to resist expressing myself here.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that in every breath in every moment I can ground myself here, and self forgive to investigating and assessing the measure within and without, as my past accepted and allowed belief constructs that lacked a consideration of all things, and become the practice of equalizing my presence here, to respect within and without the real symbols as the physical world.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to exist as polarized energetic entities within and as myself, self absorbed within limited constructions of opinions and ideas about reality.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to use my greatest strength to and towards self absorption, instead of considering all things, taking that which is good and does no harm, to realize my symbiotic potential as life here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that when and as I tense up within and as me, I am resisting here, becoming self absorbed, wanting to force my polarized value judgements onto reality, instead of humbling myself here, respecting all things, giving as I would receive.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not live my innate self responsibility as who and what I am, as life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to resist values, to not see in every moment, in every breath, the values expressed without resistance and to them give as I would receive, to walk the practical, as what does no harm, and what brings limitation into equality and oneness with the physical infrastructure here, as the basic needs of what it means to live in abundance on a physical planet.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand how self absorbed I have accepted and allowed myself to be, in protection and self defense, mirroring the present system without.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand the inferiority of my own self absorption in relation to the life that is the means of me, here as the physical.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand around all the desires as beliefs and opinions and ideas as what I have allowed to be a self absorption is my own construct accepted and allowed that is my separation from myself as life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that I am the source of my own fear.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to not see realize and understand that I am the source of my own isolation from life, through my own accepted and allowed self absorption in self interest, resisting cross reference with the nature of the physical world, which is self forgiveness, a practice of respect for the physical world, as assessment and investigation of the physical world around me, in every breath, here. to become in practice, in thought word and deed what does no harm, and considers all things.

When and as I find myself resisting here, as in lacking a respect for all forms, I stop and I breath and I slow myself down and I assess what is here, to see, realize and understand what is here as the physical.

When and as I find myself tensing up within and as me, I stop and I breath, and I self forgive beliefs, opinions and ideas, realizing my own survival behavior as fear of loss about information, about possible ‘ what if’ situations as imaginations as what I have accepted and allowed myself to become absorbed with as information within and as me, and I quantify the information within and humble myself to the information without, to assess and investigate, until I see, realize and understand a consideration of all things, to live self forgiveness in every moment.

Day 502 What is paranormal?

What is the Paranormal?

I remember walking around in New York City and looking at people’s backs. I remember this sense that there was something there, inside. I have two specific memories. One is of myself walking towards home from having done street performing. I am on a corner of eighth street and I stop and think, what is in that person’s back.

Around this time as well, I encountered a demon. But the event did not match, and yet did match, everything i had been told, as knowledge and information only about demons. I am not going to tell the whole story because I have told it before. What I saw before the behavior of a demon, was a man. It was like a split second before the demon anger came. By this time, it was too late, I had seen the man behind the curtain of emotion, lol, like seeing the paranormal world before it projected excessive emotional reactions as what we have been lead to believe a demon is. What was very clear to me, was that this man could not touch me, no way, unless I allowed it.

But, the problem with all of this, is that this is a separation from here. None of this is equality with life, with here. It is all the behaviors of separation, it is all paranormal, it is a separation from what is constant, what is eternal, what is normal. What is normal is here, equality and oneness with and as the physical. This is to say, that were there a “ god” he has to be here, right here, moving equal and one with the physical world, in balance with here, this is normality, because it is in being normal, here, that one moves and directs as a physical being, the physical being the formation of life into creation. Thus, life can only exist here. The physical is life. That other existence, as demons, had to equalize to here, to the physical. And this has been done. So, the process of equalization to physical reality is the only solution, and yet the rewards are great, if we humans decide to realize inequality does not work.

On the economic front, I notice in looking at the history of countries , is that there is a point where that country was taking care of itself nationally. Then our so-called economics came in and things started to fall apart. This was with the advent of a GDP, which was also when some sort of - usually American backed- committee - economic or under the guise of democratic or economic development  ( both susceptible to ambiguity ) was formed measuring only international resource movement via money. Here, all measure was about turning the wealth of the country into exports. Domestically, workers lost a living wage, and austerity set in. Inflation came about and then more committees came, using more of what caused the problem in the first place. What is being ignored, is life as the physical means of creating value, which is the labor and the environment. And thus, this begins to exist in a state of neglect, and a state of neglect is purposely created to force more of what causes the problem in the first place. And then some say this is the way it is. Which makes no sense, because at some point these countries I have looked at did live a very high degree of self sustainability, And Syria is one of them. Thus, what is happening in Syria is an constructed imbalance for personal gain. It is a crime against life.

One thing Allende in Chile did was subtract all detriment in lack of care when nationalization transpired. Which, ended up negating any compensation to a supposed  owner. In so many ways, this must be done on earth, because the present system of inequality has caused so much harm to earth, we will be lucky is we can balance out what we are doing in ways that do no harm, that take that which is good and order the disorder we have allowed in believing that someone who moves digits and letters around on a piece of paper is more than someone who moves seeds and water around on the ground. One is not more than another, they are the same, they are a human  ordering and realizing how the physical world works, and building new structures and ways of physical existence that bring efficiency and new standards of physical being. A Living Income guarantee will allow the innate ability of men to be fluid. This is the real nature of the human, to organize and self discover to understand physical creation, as the physical is the manifestation of creation. The paranormal, is the mind consciousness system, or a cognitive map, that is believed to be more than reality, when it is just a map, to reference, and as such must, with every breath, cross reference physical reality. Which, to add, is why a system of representation that is so separated from the ground and yet allowed to make decisions with very little communication exists, because open communication brings in all factors, and as such does not allow a division into inequality.

So, what is in our backs? It is the accumulation of our inequality to life, it is the weight of our separation from life, it is our accumulated values of limitation where a self interested gain pushes away the bad which is what was ignored, to grasp that gain in a belief that it creates a more than, when it is in fact life in reverse. We see this every day, we see this in the constant self validation as the stories people tell of what they have done, as their experiences, which is really a cry of guilt and a maintenance of holding onto a separation from self as life, consuming and weighing down the physical body. In the back, it looks like this heavy stiffening thick thing. This is the real monster in existence, this is the real demon and it is the cause of the geopolitical and economic structures that move all that is freely given for self discovery into what allows accumulation of value/wealth in self interest.

The problem is that we all see it. We choose to ignore it. Which is an abdication of life, and abuses the animals and the plants and the soils. Our system reacts to the problem outflows, instead of addressing the problem, taking the problem into solution, to then become the reward of life. We can no longer move as problem reaction solution, because a solution to a reaction is a quick fix and not a solution addressing the problem. Because of this, no solution has been found, only quick little media bites telling a partial story, which is just more of the same.

We have technological programs that allow imput from all dimensions of existence, to ensure that what we do respects and cares for physical creation, as the physical is creation,  we need only forgive out separation and realize within this that all that will happen is that we will fall to the physical ground. For this we must implement a structure that is one vote per person on all decisions, to educate the human back into equality and oneness in direct seeing and understanding with self as life as physical existential awareness and  become the sound as the voice as the manifestation of a democracy. For this, our natural resources must be nationalized, as they are freely given as the physical to support the physical.

Stand up and support a Living Income Guarantee. Time to balance ourselves within. Walk self forgiveness, writing and corrective application, to equalize one self, to life. Become a normal actual living being. It is the gateway to life.