Learning to read myself and the world around me. Day 755

I notice I spend some time every day watching the news feed on the internet. Why do I do this? What am I looking for or, rather, which is more telling, what am I looking at, as a form, as a movement? What are the patterns? 

I think of a sports game, where the team cannot get out of a pattern, cannot see beyond the boundaries of their own understanding, using their sensibility to see their own constructs as a pattern, a math, and moving into a relationship of what they are as understanding of movement and form, and opening this up to take in the patterns of the opposing team, and the form of the sport overall - the rules governing that sport- and deconstructing it to reconstruct in one moment, quantumly, to change up their movement. And that as a team, everyone being in synch. 

Or a musician, who has played and  moved with so many patterns, being given a new pattern that can easily be rendered in sound, with and as that sense of the parts and the whole, being able to move the smallest parts around into a yet unrecognized form. This is a changeability that when one learns the parts, the smallest of things, one can order with that. This also needs practice with forming things with the parts, which could be called opportunity.

I look at how we teach our children, using memory. I realize that if we remain within a certain tempo, a very slow one, we resonantly become that. And it is ‘ thing’ that we become within us. I mean why do songs remain in our heads on one level? It just shows how we are like a battery that can hold forms. Memory learning is a slowing down process, not a bad, in itself, yet when held as the ONLY thing we do, to learn, creates a state of being that can get lost in itself, just as a song can get stuck within us. Memory learning is the means of creating cognitive dissonance, because it is a rhythm creating state of being, that in itself can cause a separation from what is actually more natural, as always sensing the parts and the whole of the world around us. 

We then are out of synch, and what we are within, does not fit into reality. We build protection mechanisms, to counter this, and make attempts at building a form to fit into society, yet over all, this effort in itself is a red flag, because it is not the action of always relating to the practical , the physical.  It makes it obvious that what is real is hidden in plain sight. The way out is the way in, to look at what was constructed as a resonance, and to de-compose it, with understanding, and rebuild. It is this process of seeing patterns, seeing the parts and the whole, and recognizing one’s own patterns of what is basically a separation, and practicing aligning this with reality, as the living world around us. I mean, imagine hiring summer help in your restaurant who had been formed in such a way? Would they need as much training, would there be as many problems, would the summer help be more aware because they had practiced being aware of the world around them, instead of stuck in memorized information, and the coping mechanisms of a disconnect from being in synch with the most basic practical things needed to work in a restaurant?  I say this, because I have had owners of salons tell me that finding a good receptionist is more difficult, as though what they see is the younger generation not having the most basic practical ability with inter-personal skills. 

 Myself, having learned an instrument, and having taught children, know what a clear structure can do for a child. As the structure is integrated - which can be done as taking the smallest parts and practicing them, through narrowing the focus, building the presence into the space- when integrated, allows the child to ‘ take off ’ meaning the child begins to realize the moving parts, and use a natural skill to peruse the moving parts and the whole, and read with greater agility, and awareness and insight, and they begin to create the sound, with ease. The outcome of greater self confidence and self esteem begins to come forth. It is like a clearer rendition of the sound begins to happen, a whole world begins to open up. Even parents can see this. I sometimes wondered if this scared parents. Meaning, the more structured and clear sound, which they can notice and speak of, at the same time scares them, as they see their child master something, which is a joy, and yet don’t want the child to go in that direction, because it is not a means to make a good living. Thus the good, becomes a bad, and that value judgement is greater than seeing the means to the end. And, it is interesting, because in the educational research, it is known that people who play musical instruments, make better managers, Why, because they have more practice in realizing the parts and the whole, seeing the overall patterns, as music is so self generative.

One of the things I ask myself every once in a while, is ‘ can I slow down and hear the grass grow.”  Meaning, am I in separation from being present in this reality, this living reality around me, am I aware of what is the same as me, as the plants that provide nutrients and the air I breath, am I aware of what is here, in respect of it, in tune - quite literally- with this? Am I doing that of which I speak? Am I assessing the forms around me, the expressions that are the relationships working in symbiotic ways to remember the synchronicity of life that is me that is the physical? Or, am I wallowing in emotions and feelings, ideas, and belief and opinions that can cause a flight and fight response if questioned? This, in itself a red flag, telling me I need to deconstruct and reconstruct, which brings an opportunity to self realize and balance out myself. 

Do I have the presence and within as that the skill to re-organize myself , in a moment, to realize my own patterns and the patterns around me, to read the space and move in ways that are what is best, as I have the choice yet must face the consequences of my actions, thus in a way, the choice is to do what is best for all? Or, how present am I really? Do I need to slow down, and assess the patterns of my behavior, to see where I am out of synch and then to correct this? I mean is that not what sports teams or musicians do when they assess a read their own formations, and change them up in a moment? Do we not all enjoy a game when this happens, and it appears to be a magic, a magic that is really only a doing, which is the magic? 

In relation to this, I can see where memory learning when only what is used is a huge means of manipulation.  And I can see, how the news feed is/are moving structures to create a veil that protects monopolies that are in them selves a bullying force of self interest,  that have no regard for the life that is this planet, and are filled with all manner of words on a page as legal documentation, that manage a state of not being in synch with this life, a real valley of good and bad, right and wrong, instead of being in tune, being in synch with this living reality.

I noticed that a politician, who had been in the American congress, posting an article yesterday that said the Obama care, or Trump care, as health insurance, were both the problem, that health insurance is a scam in itself. This is interesting too, because there are doctors standing up, after practicing the ‘ health industry’ for years, saying things such as there being methods of vitamin C therapies that can cure, or place the body back into a state of proper function.  These voices are not heard on the bought-and-paid for platforms so many are calling the fake news. One story really had me look at myself. It was a video documentary on the twin towers falling in New York. I remember when it happened that I asked the question as to where all the rubble went. Meaning, I remember that little voice within me, questioning why there was not the amount of rubble such massive buildings would create, on the ground. I mean where were the parts of the supposed plane that ostensively flew into the buildings? I did not follow up on that thought, as all the stories of information rushing around were a distraction that I followed instead of listening to myself. 

When I watched this documentary, that one little question returned.  I did not follow my own questioning. Most likely, I would not have found answers unless I came upon some buried news feed, silent yet running in the background just as my inner question was more silent and running in the background.  

Basically, to explain this in context, the documentary described a form of incendiary action that turned the physical things of the towers into dust, which spread and settled all over, even turning parts of cars on more distant blocks into partial incendiary actions. I ask myself who would have such know how and ability but those who have managed to accumulate excessive wealth, which are only a few in this world today. The distraction onto national or religious groups, is overall, a distraction in itself. This in itself is investigating what form we have on this earth, that we as a collective are allowing. Each has the capacity to do this, and I am sure that others have had those little questions happen - what is left of one’s common sense within. It is there, and it needs to become larger than the sounds of cognitive dissonance called value judgements as beliefs, opinions and ideas that react when a counter belief disrupts the resonance as ideas one has defined one’s self as. That anxiety of ‘ flight and fight’ has to be checked each time it comes up, because we are not in a physical jungle, we are in a jungle of information. This is something more meta-physical and it cannot touch you or define you unless you accept and allow it to. You are the musician, you are the sport player, you, by design, have the ability to see the parts and the whole, see the patterns of how what is here moves, and realize choices that are what is best for all. 

Time frames of the mind Day 705

As we become what we practice, because we place our presence, our ability to sense a frame, a measure of time, a distance, a movement to do something, or order something, to sense its order.  Within this we essentially all learn the same way. 

We forget that our habits can become titles such as ‘ I am a visual learner’ which is secondary, and reveals more what movements and means and habits we have created, in a frame of time, as a structure that we then define ourselves as. We believe that the frame existed as what we define ourselves as, when that frame came after. Even though some of it was impulsed and passed down resonantly, in DNA, that seed of information. Or, because we in a sense, absorb so well, we absorb the measure, the morality of our parents. This is why religion is in the format that it is. It is structure, one must just question the structure, which is done through words and parables, or metaphors, the more one knows and can speak, on a soap box/podium/stage the more ‘ wise’ one appears. Key word: appears- in that bubble- away from the practical.

 The generations before us realized this, yet placed it in a metaphysical environment, as religion, within such statements as ‘ the sins of the fathers last for seven generations’  This is a truth that is right in front of us, yet it is connected to a threat of not getting into heaven- another televised vision, that matrix of energy that once the plug is pulled cannot withstand the test of longevity and was really the manifestation of our collective dissonance from real living, which is what bringing heaven to earth was all about. All practical. No Mumbo Jumbo! the real cells of life, are the physical things all around us. Science discovers this more and more every day. 

I make such statements again and again, because it is the means to the end. It is a mirage of separation, what we carry around in our heads, it is what was not grounded in practical reality, it is a within that is not equal to a without, it is why the child becomes all the faults of the parent. 

And so, the time frame of separation continues. This leads to a structural violence, prevalent in that life on the other side of the world whose time frame we ignore , or dare not to fathom, because it means we must realize how entrenched we are in our own individual time frames. It shows how much we fear being self honest. And yet, we see it, unless we are so far gone that we choose a very narrow existence, away from anything that counters our own time frames.

These time frames become reels of information, that bind us away from real living and real transformation. We become heavy with the rage of our own time frames, losing all spatial sense of reality, this physical existence. It begins with a tiny movement, that presence making a choice of using visuals, or kinesthetic learning, or what ever label one chooses. These are really justifications for not changing, and the screaming of limitation, to not become responsible.

The scream of limitation can manifest as voices running in the head, eating off the flesh.  If one’s back tempo of chat/ of voices/ of what one hides, are of comparison, one is jealous and competitive, comparing the smallest of things ( again revealing capacity of absorbing and understanding so much detail and measure- only misplaced with charged value judgements) within a relationship of survival and a feel good within an idea, or belief, that one is better. Sometimes it goes the other way, and one makes the judgement that one is less, hopeless, worthless. The measure, the song, the voice, that state is there, in the words, on one’s conception. It all becomes visible, as one speaks on parables/metaphors/value judgements silent or voiced, it is projected within or without, and it stems from the sea of potential within, as that starting point of creation, that begins with a movement. A very cool gift, it all depends on what one does with this, what one accepts and allows. The choices we make can do no harm, and can throw no one under the bus. 

Then, if one’s job/livelihood/MO is dependent on the limited structure of such belief, making a change is a threat to one’s existence, even at the expense of suppressing the real potential of another person within, especially a child. For this there is no greater crime, it is worse than anything any person in history has done, and it perpetuates the burden of seeded/noted information that is not what is best for those generations to come. All because I, or one, as the self, is not willing to stand up and speak of what is right here in front of us. We have become what we do, watch movies and entertainment running on reels - time frames of limited perspective. We are allowing this within. The moment one realizes that one has not heard what another person has said, is the moment one can live the extent of this of which I speak. I have to forgive myself all the time and ask another to please repeat what they have said. And, each of us are going to have to do this a lot, because this has been going on for a very very very long time. 

I can ask myself if i remember what I did yesterday. I can ask myself why I did not hear what another person said in a moment. I can ask myself why I cannot remember so many details about another life, a life I had with children in another country. I can ask myself why I have no sense of why when I wake a walk around the same island, that though I notice the plants are different every year, I cannot say why they are different, i have never used that great absorbent ability to sense why there are constant changes in the environment in which I live. It is because my presence is not here, it is up in a metaphysical construct, or lol, I wrote contract, of time frames, a morality, That I accepted and allowed, starting as a child, in a world that was of a society of men, in separation from creation. Walking back is a bitch, yet to hold the value of life within and as me, to become equal and one with and as it, is to live creation, to connect with the plants and the animals, first I must understand my own separation and the characteristics of that separation, and words and the processing and holding of numbers and words can help me to sort myself out, this and forgiving the time frames of limited values I have defined myself within and as. 

Also, the greater understanding I have of the money system, the greater understanding I have of the control mechanisms existent as the system on earth, I say ON EARTH because it is a construct that is not aligned with creation. It through control builds the survival game that is a busyness in a narrow focus. It is the outward manifestation of what each has accepted and allowed.  It uses the natural law in its own interest, the acceptance of a few determining what we thing, what we eat, and how we manage our health. None of it is working, thus it is time to become equal and one to the framework of the physical world, as it is life manifest, it is the real symbol. It is a living symbol.

When we can begin to hear the grass grow, then can we begin to work together and build heaven on earth. We have to get ourselves back to the real potential of who and what we are.  It is time to stand and accept only what does no harm, accept only what respects this earth, accept only that which is of no lie, meaning leaves no burden of justification, because it gives as we would receive, that which empowers each to see directly here. This means to process the information of life, which is physical. What we resist persists, what we ignore becomes an elephant in the room.  What we deny comes back to haunt us, and builds fire walls that consume our attention to such an extent, we leave this earth barely being able to walk because we have lost all spatial sense of what is real, the physical world. 

Day 302 Disgust Character Imagination Dimension

Imagination Dimension Disgust character
I notice that when I get into an argument and become angry, I become a sneer, like I am so possessed with disgust. There is some development going on next to me, and I talked with the developer. he did not like my question, and became immediately defensive, I could feel anger coming up in me, so much smaller, yet still there. I begin to project disgust towards this person, distain, and a glee, in thinking that this person revealed themselves to me and now I have license to attack. This is all based on fear of loss, and it is the same behavior I encountered with my parents, which I wrote about in a previous blog. This, “ okay, you are acting in self interest, bullying me, so you are now equal to me, and no better than I in my own self interest, so we are even, even to be the same.” This wry smile, a glare as an expression on the face appears, like Pnadora’s box has been opened. What does this do? Nothing. And we all do this, it just moves so fast and has been done so often that we do not even notice it anymore. It is done indirectly, directly, aggressively and passively. Were it not done, than this world would be a different place. And, since this is a movement within, this suggests that this need not be what we are, as even one moment of being forgiving, means that this is what can be the movement within, it is only ourselves/myself stopping the forgiving of myself as life, within and as the principle of what is best for all. The situation I spoke of above, is about money, and all this other person could see was a threat to their money, to their survival and since these behaviors are accepted, this survival to not lose, to not face a death, be it the final death, a death of social status , a death of monetary support as in loss, within consideration of immediate self needs only, without considering what goes on for all inhabitants of earth, is criminal. How can living in constant worry about survival be an expression of life? How can we even consider that there is any other option but to care for all life, especially in the face that we have major transportation and communication systems across the earth? There is food grown all over this earth, there are robots now that can lift heavy things, I mean, there is absolutely no reason, what is here on this earth is not being taken care of as life, needs met. The only thing stopping us at the moment is an entrenched behavior of complacency. If we/I could just take a deep breath and step outside of our metaphysical minds, in not much time at all could this world be turned around. The first step is to stabilize what is here, with food and shelter and clean water. Then, once this is done, move from there.
In common sense, there are major distribution centers all over the world, I mean we can sure get guns and tanks and naval ships every where! There are even cards measuring every oyster! I mean really! There are satellites circling in space, taking picture of the earth. And it is not that rich man with the money in his pocket that placed that satellite there, the money moved the resource un-equally, but it did not physically move that resource, what has been dictated is a metaphysical idea imposed as a picture in the mind that that money created that satellite, this is, in all common sense NOT what actually, physically happened here, as a movement to place that satellite up there in space. This satellite could just as well been placed there within a system where all life was supported, because the hands of men are here, these hands have been developing what is here to enable that satellite to come into existence, for generations. Metaphysical mind is a new term for superstition, all fancied up and used in higher education for some glorifying nuance that is actually shades of grey of separation in the world of shadowy illusion, the metaphysical tool of the mind made bigger than life.
So, this disgust is my separation into self interest because I believed someone else was doing this, thus it means it’s okay for me. This is, “ Let’s open Pandora’s box together and play metaphysical dress up with separation into and as energy, let’s impose a fantasy on the physical world, a limited one at that, and cut our noses off despite our face”
The problem is that here is no such thing as win and lose, the action and belief of this means separation from here, from communication in common sense of what supports all life, where what is supportive, really supportive of self is supportive of all on earth. Thus there is only a win-win scenario within providing what is necessary for a dignified life for all of existence. And the means for this are here. This is life having a real free will, a will of itself as the substance of self, being free, and this is the nature of life, mind in place as the tool that it is, that which takes a metaphysical picture of life, but is not life, thus does the actual physical world show us the outflows of our perception, allowing us to self realize ourselves in equality and oneness in and as life. What the human has done is gotten lost in the action of the mind as the metaphysical image mechanism. It was only the desire to be a “god” that turned the mind/image maker into a reality.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that if I encounter self interest , as fear of loss, that I then have the right to join the game, because if you are doing it than it is okay for me to do so also.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand immediately how I have judged another as acting in self interest, to stop and not allow myself to become disgusted which means I have already also become a judgement instead of becoming one and equal to the separation as a separation from common sense, and to within this to breath and take the principle of oneness and equality, of what is best for all is best for self, and to direct myself accordingly.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that the moment I imagined escaping punishment as a child, and joining the behaviors of separation as what my parents had learned and existed as, I joined in the game of win and lose, energetic polarities of separation as a total package that is an outcome of loss, yet the immediate outcome appeared to be a win, which was in essence a superficial win, as the eventual outcome would be death.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that the disgust was myself that I then projected onto my parents, as I became a justifying state as a feeling in and as glee, as I had only won a momentary reprise from punishment, beginning a slow death into existing as fear, a fear of loss.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that this is the past, and not myself here, and thus judging myself , and/or continuing to allow this as an adult, is unacceptable.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to spite myself and the world around me, I enter the game of separation and become disgusted, wanting all around me to suffer the same.
I commit myself to no longer accepting and allowing myself to project disgust onto another, to when and as I realize what i am doing, as I remain in and as breath, here, I stop and I do not allow myself to become a habituated behavior learned in childhood in protection and defense in and as becoming a lie.
I commit myself to no longer accept and allow myself to compare one thing against another, using a value system of limitation from common sense of physical reality, as what was taught within my cultural upbringing, where when I find myself judging one thing as more than I go into a behavior of self disgust/inferiority and or judge something as less than where i project disgust onto that which I judge as less than and allow myself to feel superior through glee , all of this a protection defense mechanism to remain within what is believed to maintain survival within a system of inequality.
I commit myself to realizing within and as every breath, what I accept and allow in every moment here, to realize that any emotion in and as disgust is myself not wanting to stand one and equal to what is here, rejecting equality and oneness, communication with life, as I am allowing a belief, based in an image from a past as mind to be what is real.
I commit myself to seeing realizing and understanding that judgement is an imposition in and as comparison of a more than and a less than categorized value of reality according to what was learned to enable my own status maintenance to survive where I would react in a projected disgust towards what was taught as less than, and also, a self disgust for separating from equality and oneness in and as myself as life.

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