More deconstruction of MLM forms Day 787

I have had this back chat that is, as always, a complaint, which is a projection of blame and spite to and towards things around me, as expectations of how things should be. This is myself not looking here, not doing the math, to see, realize and understand here, this reality, this physical reality. This reality that on paper is slowly being owned by a few, which begs a question, as to what is real, as the separation from here, as religion and so much of our entertainment, and the very design of our schools, and taxing system, is all about separation from looking here. It is a diversion tactic, as what is real, is made insignificant, and what is real, the real means, is through paper castles, owned by a few. The system is a reflection of how much we make our personification larger than the reality. Thus, it is each of us, that allows this diversion tactic, because it is simply a reflection of what we are allowing within ourselves. What we practice, accumulates and becomes what we are, because it is what we practice personalizing, personifying. It is composed of relationships.  

We are a twist on that statement of and as ‘ trying to get a fish to climb a tree.”  We are, trying to get ideas, beliefs and opinions of ourselves to be more real than the reality around us. That busy work of self abdication of self responsibility becomes a personification of values, that creates a busyness of rejecting all of what we are as the real values that compose this physical reality, and we become a kind of displaced form, like a fish tryng to climb a tree. It cannot work, does not work, and will not work, we need only look around and realize this in application, even within simply realizing how the system, a system that controls this lack as well, that is also a mirrored reflection of maintaining the distraction and taking control of what is actually real. The irony is that nothing can be owned, and everything that is here is freely given, as it is the means of creation, as it is what manifests from what is practiced. What is real, can withstand the timing of a state of separation that is a out of synch focus. In a way, one must learn control of self, before one can move forward effectively.  Creation is amazing! It is a gift.

Thus within my own process, somehow, at this point I am looking at once again the MLM umbrella , as a belief, that is warped and then related to any form of structure, thereby being a misinterpretation of order and structure. 

A tree is a structure, where the sum of parts work together creating a whole.  One could label and define separate parts as more than or less than, when each part must have the other part to function. A multi level marketing form, is of separate parts living separate and small actions that lead to the end gal of what that multi level form is bringing to the market place of reality. A system of bringing things to market, is composed of different parts doing different sums, as actions that complete the whole and bring forward the things that are there to, hopefully improve our existence.  There are schemes where money is transferred within this, that are supposed to increase one’s money. As we all can realize, this can be abused, and yet the basic inherent form is not a bad, if anything it is natural. Yet, would not a government, that desires to own, under the guise of government, hidden behind a corporation as that which seems to eventually own things, that also works as a multi level marketing form, push, as manipulate when a form is abused, thougt as said, inherently good, manipulate within demonizing a form, and placing all under that umbrella, making itself larger than life, as that government and hidden corps, behind this projected fish being told to climb a tree? I mean, it begins to become quite obvious. It is astounding that we conceptually can’t see what is in plain sight, as we are all so busy projecting our own personal survival belief systems, we cannot see what is here, because we stand in front of our own created curtains! I mean, perhaps in the story of the Wizard of Oz, the mis-take was that that curtain, was not in front of the man manipulating the buttons, it was a curtain self composed, self accepted, self allowed ! 

Have a look, within words that are swimming around in our educational research system. This term, I should say, of and as a zone of proximal development, means that one comes forward within knowing a form to move with, so well, one then expands in one’s awareness of the form. When one moves from where one is at, one expands. if one tries to jump that expansion, one has a greater difficulty, because one is having to process more information suddenly, instead of building from what is known, into what is as of yet unknown. And this, with that inherent ability to absorb and understand. All of this, can be slowed down, creating confusion, if one is not equal to where and what one is doing, or trying to do something in which what one physically is, is not well suited for and as.  Liken this to learning to play an instrument, one masters the instrument to a certain extent and then begins to play with others, and then can begin to register the reactions of the audience, and even play with the sound, in terms of seeing what directs the focus of the audience onto the music, etc. This is all the means of moving into greater awareness, much like moving into the awareness of the multiple levels of and as how something works. This is the natural ability of each of us, thus removing opportunity is to slow this down, and stagnate this. In a system of survival, it is going to happen, that the natural ability of each of us, will face this natural ability to expand, from happening. Within this, I can see where the entertainment industry is that means to an end, and here, there is nothing wrong with information being shared via media ( real live connection may be best, but media sharing is also a way to begin to build a general scaffold ! ) . In all of this, what we do, as what we allow at the moment, one could not really criticize the parts, yet, when relating the parts to the whole, and to allowing a human being to realize their potential, suddenly that form, of good sounding parts, begins to fall short. Yet, there is a whole system, of multiple levels, holding that market of offering, in place! And that is being held in place, as a means of survival, yet, overall, each part, that is capable of realizing this, is ignoring this, Ultimately, as I state in words here, in relation to this, we are not stupid, yet we are accepting ignorance, in self interest, and that becomes a stagnation of our capacity, and an abuse on those freely given resources that are the gift of self realization as life. 

Sometimes, things cannot be denied, no matter how much what has been accepted and allowed, as that personification that screams survival, is and does, the separation from reality is visible in plain sight if we take the time to slow down and LOOK at the patterns, and how much the words we speak, are not grounded in the practical living reality around us. Within this, I had the thought yesterday, that words are in themselves, the slowing down of sound, to allow man to really begin to LOOK, they are, a great means of realizing the math, the real math, and the presented math, as structure around us in this world, and how much sound is manipulated. The game becomes like shifting sands, never having the same form each day, hard to catch, seemingly impossible to realize, yet, within each, is the inherent capacity, to realize each grain of sand, and each shifting wind, to see the sum of the parts in their constant movement to and towards balance, where it is only ignorance that warps that inherent expression of life, always here, to move into what is best for all, if we simply allow ourselves to realize who and what we are, as life. 

In realizing the good, and choosing what does no harm, we can rejoice in the children to come, and the parents to share and show, to move from our present zone of proximal development into being equal and one to the essence of the expression of life, which is to create and expand and live. It is time to master the instrument of life that is you, which means mastering your words, to learn to sound the inherent and natural creation that is you as life. 

Time frames of the mind Day 705

As we become what we practice, because we place our presence, our ability to sense a frame, a measure of time, a distance, a movement to do something, or order something, to sense its order.  Within this we essentially all learn the same way. 

We forget that our habits can become titles such as ‘ I am a visual learner’ which is secondary, and reveals more what movements and means and habits we have created, in a frame of time, as a structure that we then define ourselves as. We believe that the frame existed as what we define ourselves as, when that frame came after. Even though some of it was impulsed and passed down resonantly, in DNA, that seed of information. Or, because we in a sense, absorb so well, we absorb the measure, the morality of our parents. This is why religion is in the format that it is. It is structure, one must just question the structure, which is done through words and parables, or metaphors, the more one knows and can speak, on a soap box/podium/stage the more ‘ wise’ one appears. Key word: appears- in that bubble- away from the practical.

 The generations before us realized this, yet placed it in a metaphysical environment, as religion, within such statements as ‘ the sins of the fathers last for seven generations’  This is a truth that is right in front of us, yet it is connected to a threat of not getting into heaven- another televised vision, that matrix of energy that once the plug is pulled cannot withstand the test of longevity and was really the manifestation of our collective dissonance from real living, which is what bringing heaven to earth was all about. All practical. No Mumbo Jumbo! the real cells of life, are the physical things all around us. Science discovers this more and more every day. 

I make such statements again and again, because it is the means to the end. It is a mirage of separation, what we carry around in our heads, it is what was not grounded in practical reality, it is a within that is not equal to a without, it is why the child becomes all the faults of the parent. 

And so, the time frame of separation continues. This leads to a structural violence, prevalent in that life on the other side of the world whose time frame we ignore , or dare not to fathom, because it means we must realize how entrenched we are in our own individual time frames. It shows how much we fear being self honest. And yet, we see it, unless we are so far gone that we choose a very narrow existence, away from anything that counters our own time frames.

These time frames become reels of information, that bind us away from real living and real transformation. We become heavy with the rage of our own time frames, losing all spatial sense of reality, this physical existence. It begins with a tiny movement, that presence making a choice of using visuals, or kinesthetic learning, or what ever label one chooses. These are really justifications for not changing, and the screaming of limitation, to not become responsible.

The scream of limitation can manifest as voices running in the head, eating off the flesh.  If one’s back tempo of chat/ of voices/ of what one hides, are of comparison, one is jealous and competitive, comparing the smallest of things ( again revealing capacity of absorbing and understanding so much detail and measure- only misplaced with charged value judgements) within a relationship of survival and a feel good within an idea, or belief, that one is better. Sometimes it goes the other way, and one makes the judgement that one is less, hopeless, worthless. The measure, the song, the voice, that state is there, in the words, on one’s conception. It all becomes visible, as one speaks on parables/metaphors/value judgements silent or voiced, it is projected within or without, and it stems from the sea of potential within, as that starting point of creation, that begins with a movement. A very cool gift, it all depends on what one does with this, what one accepts and allows. The choices we make can do no harm, and can throw no one under the bus. 

Then, if one’s job/livelihood/MO is dependent on the limited structure of such belief, making a change is a threat to one’s existence, even at the expense of suppressing the real potential of another person within, especially a child. For this there is no greater crime, it is worse than anything any person in history has done, and it perpetuates the burden of seeded/noted information that is not what is best for those generations to come. All because I, or one, as the self, is not willing to stand up and speak of what is right here in front of us. We have become what we do, watch movies and entertainment running on reels - time frames of limited perspective. We are allowing this within. The moment one realizes that one has not heard what another person has said, is the moment one can live the extent of this of which I speak. I have to forgive myself all the time and ask another to please repeat what they have said. And, each of us are going to have to do this a lot, because this has been going on for a very very very long time. 

I can ask myself if i remember what I did yesterday. I can ask myself why I did not hear what another person said in a moment. I can ask myself why I cannot remember so many details about another life, a life I had with children in another country. I can ask myself why I have no sense of why when I wake a walk around the same island, that though I notice the plants are different every year, I cannot say why they are different, i have never used that great absorbent ability to sense why there are constant changes in the environment in which I live. It is because my presence is not here, it is up in a metaphysical construct, or lol, I wrote contract, of time frames, a morality, That I accepted and allowed, starting as a child, in a world that was of a society of men, in separation from creation. Walking back is a bitch, yet to hold the value of life within and as me, to become equal and one with and as it, is to live creation, to connect with the plants and the animals, first I must understand my own separation and the characteristics of that separation, and words and the processing and holding of numbers and words can help me to sort myself out, this and forgiving the time frames of limited values I have defined myself within and as. 

Also, the greater understanding I have of the money system, the greater understanding I have of the control mechanisms existent as the system on earth, I say ON EARTH because it is a construct that is not aligned with creation. It through control builds the survival game that is a busyness in a narrow focus. It is the outward manifestation of what each has accepted and allowed.  It uses the natural law in its own interest, the acceptance of a few determining what we thing, what we eat, and how we manage our health. None of it is working, thus it is time to become equal and one to the framework of the physical world, as it is life manifest, it is the real symbol. It is a living symbol.

When we can begin to hear the grass grow, then can we begin to work together and build heaven on earth. We have to get ourselves back to the real potential of who and what we are.  It is time to stand and accept only what does no harm, accept only what respects this earth, accept only that which is of no lie, meaning leaves no burden of justification, because it gives as we would receive, that which empowers each to see directly here. This means to process the information of life, which is physical. What we resist persists, what we ignore becomes an elephant in the room.  What we deny comes back to haunt us, and builds fire walls that consume our attention to such an extent, we leave this earth barely being able to walk because we have lost all spatial sense of what is real, the physical world. 

Day 309 Disgust Character Back Chat Dimension

In the last days, catching myself going into disgust, which is labeling , which is spite, which is like a collection of values developed according to class, and race, and nationality, and gender, like I have a new astrological ordering system, as this is really no different than any systemic order of value into more than and less than - an “astro” value/logic ; relating to stars, stars being a consumer based entertainment, of watching what is a-maze-ZING, a zap of excitement and feel good, of emotional accolade connection, of making something “positive” within worshipping our own inability and turning it into feeling good because someone else has this. This next best thing to not being self responsible and looking at ourselves and this present system, because we can prove through our lack that we are still good because we can point out good - as in following a star quality. Notquestioning why the exception to the “norm” exists, where the exception reveals the ability, allowed development in ONLY a few.
So, we have two things here;
An accepted norm that indicates and accepted lack of development.
And, a state of being that perpetuates this lack through ogling the development, turning it into a more than, and ourselves a less than, and making this okay because we are worshipping the more than. Singular, limited, ignorant of life, of the substance of what we are as life, here.

And all the strings of belief that we are not good enough, we lack, which is what we are taught, which is what we accept and allow, not knowing ourselves as life, as we are consciousness in separation from moving one and equal with and as what is physically real. Our “astro” logic, our star chasing actions in admiration of a “more than” hide us from facing our own self discovery, of becoming ourselves as life, we are watching the stars instead of listening to ourselves as life, that sense that we know we are not standing up within what is supportive of life, as we move in self interest only, our star gazing admitting to self accepted lack. The consequences of this are compounding, so resplendent in what is happening on earth, so, the effects of profit in self interest, will soon be at your door.

We admire “star” quality instead of being that which is the source of the “star” ourselves. And this action is diminishing the fabric of life, as this earth. Allowing one point to be more than another is denying the existence of what is what creates, as being the value.

So, within myself as consciousness, as a system of value qualification, I am walking a projection of what is more than and less than, my own data book of what I reject as being less, based on beliefs accepted and taught, and voicing what I believe is more, to appear “good” and to hide my own lack of directing myself as life, in common sense of how I function within and as a physical being on this physical world. I am in essence rejecting myself as life, rejecting self responsibility in equality and oneness with and as the substance of life. And were I to to this within this embedded system of separation from life as it now exists, I would be cast out in spite, by those who walk a consciousness only, so great would the denial be, as the habit of self denial as life is now manifest as the accepted system of money determining life, which is why what brings this world back to reality is a system of equality, where money that has taken on the value developed from earth’s freely given resources, and divided this value into some getting more than others, despite the abuse this is and has created to this physical world, must become what exists on this earth to realign ourselves within and as the value being life where money is used to take the value of the resources made to support life, to be distributed to in fact support all life, realizing that life is the value.

So, the back chat in and as my mind of what is a “star” value and what is not, in and as disgust, is where I reject that which I fear will give me a lesser “star” value within and as my own survival, my disgust is really my fear of survival, my separation from what I have judged as less, what I have not accepted as being within myself as I believe it will take away from my life, when this is not of a lesser value,it is simply made to seem less than, and its existence is not fixed, it can be clarified into being directed within and as what is best for all, meaning there is nothing that can be lost, what is lost is only self direction in and as life, here. Thus, the value system of more than and less than is the illusion. It is like rejecting the very “food” of what allows self direction. Star chasing is the act of self denial as life. This, an act of stagnation only.
It means that all limitations are simply accepted “end games” and nothing else, and these end games warp reality.

It means we can no longer sit and watch TV. I means we can not longer remain stagnant, it means we can no longer accept the unacceptable.

It means that when I begin to feel a hole within my chest, and hear the voices in and as my mind of judging the being of another as stupid and ignorant, the only choice is to look at that state of being and to speak in such a way that directs from that state of being, fixed in an idea of an end game, as what is believed, just as we do with children, if we tell them they are “this or that” instead of formatting the question to suggest that the being of what they are can be moved towards an awareness of change into and as what directs, and within this existing as the principle as what we teach in our schools, and what we state within our laws as being responsible within the common good before profit, because we know what we are doing, and then this world would realize itself.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe in the back chat in and as my mind of what is less than, which I reject as not what I am in and as naming this and pushing this away in and through reacting in disgust, not seeing realizing and understanding that this is myself separating myself from here, within and as being directive within and as what is best for all here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize how I am clinging to knowledge and information, instead of being one and equal with what is here, wanting being here to be easy, where within my knowledge I find a “star” solution to justify ignoring how I am within what I allow myself to be as the very expression and direction of myself here, within not realizing that for myself to be and become life, what is best for me as life, is what is best for all, where the consciousness in and as what I am as mind exists as is limited values made huge in self validation as justification for not standing up equal and one to and as life here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to to not realize a movement within and as myself as emotions, thoughts and feelings as limited energetic imbalance as the very nature of separation from existing within and as life, in sound equality with the principle of what is best for all being a state of ease, where no conflict and friction exist within and as me here, as being within and as sound is voicing what is best for all, as what is best for all, is a state of equality and oneness with physical existence, where in contrast the mind, as consciousness is unstable as it lacks a physical perceptive ability of common sense.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting back chat in and as the voice of consciousness, the voice of limitation, the voice of more than and less than value judgements, based on a system manifest without that reflects the separation from life as the human within, of self abdication in and as life, that draws attention to details as descriptions of others, being locked into a state of stagnation as what is real, having lost touch with self as being self directive within and as self as life, this being what is best for self, and thus what is best for all.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become impatient with the voice as the expression of consciousness, not seeing realizing and understanding that such is myself as life, equal and one, and thus the only choice is to direct what expression exist on this earth to and towards what is the principle of what is best for all, as all that is here is capable of allowing life, within and without, where all life is allowed self responsibility in and as life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that shame, as the sham, of consciousness as mind, as being self in separation from an equal and one physical and spirit connection realizing that the physical is a means of self being an expression of life, where the mind is an image as idea, opinion and belief, which are not what is life, as this is a projection onto life as idea only and not the actual physical world.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that there is nothing to fear, as fear is a separation into and as no longer being equal and one to and as what is real here, and thus an indicator of separation in and as a lack in understanding equal and one communication with and as what is physically real, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear energetic responses as being real.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear the storm of separation manifest as back chat as systemic accepted and allowed value judgements of what is more and what is less, this being parroted through words and deeds of pointing out what is accepted and allowed as a more than, which is obeying a system of inequality and thus survival in self interest instead of what supports all life, equal and one, where life is realized and the value, of which the physical world reveals a realization of practices that are what is best for all, as such would create a world of sustainability, stability, security, which is presently not what exists on earth if one chooses to go and investigate the behaviors of men, animals, soils, and plants.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become reactive to the ignorance of the nature of life, in and as a persona of disgust which is a reaction in and as fear, which is separation from and as life,to slow myself down and to breath, to become equal with the physical and from here to choose what is best for all within and as being what is best for self is best for all.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that as a sense of disgust comes tumbling down, I stop and I breath, and I do not allow a hole of fear within and as what i am be the response of myself, I stop I breath, I bring myself back here, and I direct this back chat judgement, as consciousness , into and as myself accepted and allowed beingness to realign this within the principle of what is best for all, to realize my disgust is myself in self abidication in and as life, here.

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Day 237 Internal Conversations/Back Chat Dimension : Victim Character

Internal Conversations/Back Chat in the Head dimension : Victim Character

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have internal conversations of judgement, in a fear of loss, distorting reality through dividing what is here, as life, into values of more than and less than, making one aspect of here huge, in self interest, to protect myself, as I cling to an idea of myself which is an act of separation from what is one and equal in all existent as life, and thus, do I become as mind as energy into a judgement as dividing and measuring values, creating polarities of greater and lesser measure of life, instead of remaining in and as sound mind, in equality and oneness with the substance of creation to move as life, as what is best for all, as this is what i am, equal and one, and thus what is best for myself as best for all.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to, as the memory which I accepted and allowed, as a past event of judgement, noisy, as back chat, showing me my own separations and judgements of more than and less than, as a being of no substance, in allowing separation from absolute equality and oneness with life, as such words as “ She thinks she is so mature”, or “ “Does she think she looks cool now”, or “ Look at that tight shirt she is wearing, to show off her boobs”, “ What a stupid thing to do”. “ How slutty is that!” , “ I was friends with that!” , “ what has happened?”, “ I don’t have those things she now has”, “ I am just a hick” , “ She looks so cool”, ‘ How dare she just ignore me!”, “ I will get her for this”, “ Just wait and see!” “ I don’t have a best friend”, ‘Now I am alone”, “ what will others think of me!” and on and on and on, one bigemotional storm of anxiety and spite and blame burning away at my flesh as I create a living hell within and as myself here, in fear of loss, in fear of my own survival based on morals taught, varying by degree within class and culture, belief and opinion, as tradition - walls of separation from what is real and what is of value, the very beingness of myself as life, here, equal and one to the substance of creation, itself sound and constant, which I ignore and , as energy- as judgement- reject in favor of existing as a divisive mind consciousness system instead of realizing equality and oneness as the substance of life, as the substance of creation, as the gift of life, able to be centered here, in and as breath, where I as a human with two hands and two feet and the gift of expression, can stand and create a system that supports all life, through distributing the freely givenresources of earth to support this value as myself as an expression in and as life, realizing that should all life on earth be supported and thus existent within expression as life, in totality, the fire of the grid as mind as separation, as ignorance, would stop, and life on earth as heaven would begin.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become, as mind, discordant, as back chat, as voices in and as my mind of judgement, of separation, and looking at this action within, realizing this for what it is, to understand what i am within in totality, to begin to realize how this self centered allowance has created a system of inequality, as limited values made huge, which manifest as energetic storms within, and abuse and destruction without, as starvation, as resource devastation, as sex slavery, as accepted “ imperfect science” practices that turn the children into murderous reactions as behaviors of frustration and confusion as they have no understanding of what they are as life, as an advertising industry uses repetition to imbed a resonance of desire thus admitting to the fact the humans are water and can be resonantly programmed to follow , which actually uses the same principles of homeopathy in admitting and using resonance to program, where homeopathy suggests that resonances within a person can be cancelled out, and thus what is denied is actually used for profit, yet this conceptually is difficult to see in common sense with so much belief, opinion, and idea, resonating within each and every one of us as what we accept and allow, and thus, to return ourselves back to becoming self directive as life, first must we, each and every one, clean up what we have accepted and allowed, as we must each learn how we created and allowed to manifest on earth happened to ensure it never happens again, to stand strong and stable in and as ourselves as life, and from here, organize this world to be and become what is best for all, to respect life as what we are, and prevent destructive practices and suppression of life expression.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to judge myself and my friend through seeing only loss in separation from understanding the existential fabric of separation as energy/mind movement, as consciousness, to not have looked at what exists in totality, and only acted in self interest, instead of realizing all of existence is me as life, as same substance.

I commit myself to breath, to remaining here, one and equal in consideration of all life, to see, realize and understand my own separations into values of more than and less than, as thought/image, as imaginations of petty, self pitying, blaming, anxious fear of loss, value judgement dramatic play outs in and as mind, limited scripts ignoring life, as back chat fanning personifications creating emotional feeling bodies that are reactions and behaviors of fear, creating a consequence of loss of self as life, as I only create more of what i allow myself to exist as, which is fear of survival, exactly what the growing system of debt on the many is creating on earth, as within so without, as above so below, destruction without starts as destruction within, as judgement, an act mankind has been told would lead to a day of judgement, which is what has been accepted and allowed with this earth as the gift of life, in how this gift was used, where there is time for man to stop and to breath life back into this gift as earth until it is too late, too late being man, consuming the resource of life sustenance without regard for the value being life, thus it is time to wake up and realize life is the value in working with what is physically here in common sense of this physical to investigate what is best for all and to chose what works for all absolutely, and not money, as money is the manifestation of judgement in determining life instead of realizing life as the value.

I commit myself to stop and to breath, and to see what separations from Life I have accepted and allowed through becoming aware of myself as mind, as consciousness, to see, realize and understand how I have separated myself in judgement and thus away from life.

I commit myself to realize that I am the cause of my own demise, and to stop and to breath, and to walk what is best for all, to use the tool of the mind, to show myself what judgement I have existed as and thus where i have ignored life in totality, to bring myself back in equality and oneness in and as life, here.

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Day 120 The voices of the past.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become the character of dreading what others will say.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have thoughts about what others will say about the choices I make.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that I will make a mistake and others will say to me that I was told and should have known, not seeing, realizing and understanding that there are no mistakes, there are only judgements about what and how one lives and where one lives.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the culture in which I live, as what I have been taught, as idea, belief and opinion is wanting it’s voice as the back chat of my mind to come up, as a reaction in and as fear of change, as what has been said to me by the world around in resistance to change in and as themselves.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that within and as me is a character in and as a feeling that I will lose people I know and thus leave something behind, when in fact if life were existent on this earth, then there would never be something left behind anywhere, as all would be here in and as the expression of life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that I need to defend the choices I make within leaving the environment in which I live.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to remain here, making this change huge and within this begin to think about the future, where I then encounter all number of imagined fears.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear what does not exist, as it is not here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize , see and understand that these back chats in and as the voices in and as my mind are the voices of my past and not myself in common sense of what is here, physically here.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to breath through the anxiety, where I am allowing this to become huge and to stop, and to look at the source as the back chat as the emotion and/or feeling, the polarity where within and as the fear and anxiety I then go into placating this negative emotional response through and as “thoughts that are uplifting” to convince myself of what it is that I am choosing to do, thus do I exist as protecting the choices i made in and as my mind, separating myself from here, what is actually here and slowing myself down within and as being self directive, self honest.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to stop and to breath and to slow myself down within and as breath, to look at what thoughts as the back chat is coming up in and as my mind to see the memories through the emotional source point of the memories as where they came from as being accepted as real, in and as my past.

I commit myself to seeing the illusion of my own thoughts and to realize they are the voices of my past.

I commit myself to standing up within myself and seeing the familiar ( interesting that family and familiar are so similar) emotions and feelings that I allow and accept as habitual fears within and as me.

I commit myself to immediately recognizing the positive placating voice in answer as echo , as protection and defense to the negative emotions as fear.

I commit myself to breathing, to stopping the thoughts as the red flags of separation from self honesty here in and as the physical.

I commit myself to realizing that there are no answers in and as the voices composed of the past in and as my mind, as the answer is life, as this is the value, in and as this actual, real physical world, the gift of life.

Creation's Journey to Life

Heaven's Journey to Life

Equal Money System

The process to birth life in the physical

Desteni

Day 68 Pondering as mind is experience as relationships

Day 68 Pondering as mind is experience as relationships

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to ponder in and as the mind, where if I return to breath, I can see, and understand what it is I am allowing myself to exist as.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to exist as viewing my accepted and allowed behaviors in relation to past experiences that I superimpose onto later experiences that are also of the past, where I do not allow myself to simply look at my own behaviors that were not self directive within the principle of oneness in equality and  let it go.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize, see and understand that all I can be is here, with what is physically here, walking within and as the principle of what is best for all, as anything else is simply a dream of the mind in separation from what is here and the being of myself as what is best for all.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear standing up and speaking as what is best for all regardless of the harsh irritations I may receive as response, which I need not fear as I have faced them many times, and often the person walks away or stops and realizes what they have just done, which is  to have reacted in a limited way.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fold over and over again experiences of the past , to stand within this and stop, to move on, to say to myself no more, this is not what is here, practically physically here.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that all mind back chat is in accordance - in a cord/bound dance- to a system of limited design where I have been conditioned to fear opposing the group; the group itself bound to survival behaviors as rushing around trying to fit into the image and likeness of what has become a “god” within society - accepted and allowed by the human- as the qualities of supposed perfection as seen in advertising, in order to be considered more than another, all based on survival.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that in giving up myself to limited ideas that serve a profit based system, I am in fact saying that i am not responsible for what exists and perpetuate the abuse through giving myself up to what I know is unacceptable.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have the thought that I have failed within this present system and thus this is why I want the world to change, which is the mind not wanting to die.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel sad that there is a lack of ability for people to communicate, where I blame myself as this as well, and within this realize that whether this is true or not, this perceived lack of ability within myself to communicate, the solution is to keep walking and practicing communication, as the opposite will lead no where and feeling sorry for myself is just “feeling sorry” for myself as this is existing within an emotional polarity of more than and less than.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that any unhappiness I may feel has nothing to do with anyone other than myself, in and as where I happen to live, yet, where I realize those living in places where the land beneath their feet is being raped for the profit of a few, are the ones experiencing, physically, a state of abuse and pain and thus have been raped of their expression as life, where the expression of life, as life is what real love is.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that anything that is in my mind, is back chat, the perpetual abdication of myself as life, my accepted and allowed separations into a belief that I have failed, a belief that “it was not my fault,” a belief that “it is impossible,” a belief that “if somehow I look at what happened again and again and again” I will somehow find a solution within the imagery - that is of the past - an experience-  when this has never happened, as all I do is spin around in a movie and do not live an actual directive that considers what is best for all, and within this, an image in and as my mind is not something that I can practically live as it is an image and thus not real.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize emotions and feelings I have become addicted to and have been taught are the proper stance to exist as, as my self personification in and as woman, where I, within my mind imagery, seek solutions that “fix” the outcome of what it is that I am pondering to make myself feel better about myself.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see that this is myself going on a emotional feel good journey where nothing is solved and all I am doing is getting an energetic fix.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize this addiction to wanting to “fix “ things, which is a control mechanism,  does not allow the people that may be involved to self direct, as I am creating conditions in and as my mind, in make believe, that I believe will resolve what is perceived to be imperfect, thus I exist as ideas and beliefs and opinions to impose on another instead of being here in this moment directing myself as what is best for all.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see that what is best for all is what allows a self directed movement by another, where I gain nothing, as support, as what actually exists is the other supporting themselves as life, and thus enabling myself to become myself as life, within this I realize that oneness in equality cannot be what is on this earth until all are able to be what is best for all.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize that I have walked as mind for so long it will take time for me to stand up as myself, to be able to speak as the living word.

I forgive myself for not realizing breath in every moment, where i have days that I focus on breath and then days where I realize I have once again separated myself from being aware of breath, one and equal as breath, realizing that breath is life, here, being in and as the physical, that which is real.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become frustrated as I interact with my world, feeling overwhelmed with the amount of back chat that exists as my mind, where I compare one thing to another, where I judge something as nice, or ugly, all limited as they do not consider an accepted and allowed system of inequality and the abdication of the human as being self directed with in the principle of what is best for all.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to re-member myself to breath in every moment, living and breathing the principle of what is best for all, which is common sense of how this physical world works, and within this continue to read about how this world functions and what is being accepted and allowed that is abusive to life - as seen through so many living in extreme situations of lack.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have imaginings of the future, which is myself in fear of the future and thus myself trying to placate myself as to the future, where I cannot know what will be in the future, and the ideas I impose onto the future, to prepare myself for the future, will not be what the future will manifest as, thus will I set myself up for disappointment and rejection of what presents itself, and within this rejecting life.

I commit myself to stopping what comes up in and as my mind, to realizing it is my fear of judgment by others, and a fear of loss, where I am capable of using my common sense and directing my self forward.

When and as any thought comes up in and as my mind, I stop and I breath as this thought is only showing me what I fear, and it is based on what I have been taught to believe is how I should be, what I should be, and who I should be in relation to limited personifications, as energetic outplay, in separation of myself here as life, and so small and insignificant it is no wonder the nature of thought is of an infinite loop swinging back and forth in perpetuity.

I commit myself to breathing and stopping all thoughts through realizing a thought, an emotion, and a feeling are all based on a polarity of more than or less than, based on an idea as a desire in relation to survival - based on a system of inequality, and thus serve no purpose in allowing myself to become one and equal to my human physical body where I am one with life, as the physical is what is real.

I commit myself to breath, to realizing all thoughts are myself in separation from being here, where I direct myself to walk into and as, one and equal to what is physically here, instead of what is a melodrama of loss and desire, of more than and less than,  an alternate reality that is inconsiderate of this physical world and thus an act of destruction through pretending something does not exist because one has believed oneself to be more than for so long what is real can not longer be seen.

I commit myself to realizing that all emotion, thought and feeling is actually direction AWAY from what is here, what is real, this physical world, and that once i realize this, in and as every breath, all thoughts emotions and feelings  will be realized for what they are, a tiny spec in which man is lost in separation from what is the gift of life, this physical world.

I commit myself to stopping the mind as being here one and equal to this physical world.

Creation's Journey to Life

Earth's  Journey to Life

Day 67 significance to the insignificance

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to give significance to the insignificance

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to make the one ankle more significance than another ankle

I forgive myself  for allowing and accepting myself to give significance to the form of one human body over another.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that one person is more significant than another, instead of realizing that the significance is being here, being life, where I keep going as life, to learn that the significance is life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that a soldier commits suicide every day as they are men paying homage to what is insignificant and thus see no value in life, as the value of themselves as life has been made to support the profit of a few instead of what is real, life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that a profit based system is the very manifestation of giving significance to the insignificant  that which causes weighing and measuring as object instead of directing as life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize that the significance placed on the physical as having values of more than and less than is to be separate from self as directing self as life, where the significance is being directive as life within the principle of what is best for all, one and equal to realizing the significance is life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to place value on knowledge and information to read to gather knowledge and information, like a computer, so I can spew knowledge and information, which is dis-placing myself from directing myself with significance as life and allowing myself to place significance on knowledge and information to appear to be infomr-ed, aligned with  a presentation of myself to fit into a picture presentation , as idea, as belief, as desire to appear to fit into a hierarchy above other qualities, where this qualifying is separating myself form the equality of the total composition of what is here, which is all the substance of what is significant which is life, and within this allowing myself to be what is the movement of myself as life one and equal, this being what is significance, where there is no need to judge.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to hate myself for not having realized that what is significant is to keep going, through all the signs of the mind as the labels and the back chat, the weighing and measuring, until I catch myself realizing that the significance is being here, being life, directing myself as life, where finally the mind stops and I become the gift of life which is  being here, directing myself as life, and thus is the mind a mirage that has possessed and obsessed focus onto in-sign-ficance ( financing the signs of capitalism )  and not  being myself  as what is significant, meaning life aligned assignment, meaning assigning myself life as the principle of what is best for all, as give as I would like to receive, as what i am that is significant,  where within this the present system here on this earth is an absolute travesty as it separates the human away from self as life, yet this has been developed and built by the annecs of the mind doting on weighing and measuring objects , stagnant, instead of directing and moving and being an expression in and as life here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize how stagnant I allow myself to be when I allow ideas, beliefs and opinions according to class, culture, race, nationality, to be the borders of myself , when these borders are what I allow to stop the movement of myself as life,  making the sign, as label huge when the sign as label is insignificance and what is real is myself here as an expression of life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize there is no rejection, as rejection is simply having allowed myself to move as label, as having moved myself as what is insignificant - the label as what I believed as desire, an energetic short lived wisp in the wind- that is as its short lived nature telling me that I am separate from myself directing myself as life, as what is constant and directive.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand the trap of the mind, the label maker, where this trap of the mind is the action of separation, this that measures and weighs, labels and collects as knowledge and information, so busy “computing” that what is significant is missed, self here, as life, realizing the value is self as life,  being HERE one and equal as what self is here as life, directing within the principle of oneness in equality.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that so many supposed failures are that one did not just keep going, but instead stopped going, where the keep going leads to realizing that the voices in the head that were of “ stop” were fear and thus insignificant, within this, I realize that all the billions of humans and animals and plants on this earth have had taken away from them what is needed to sustain life, what was given to sustain life unconditionally by this earth, have been ripped out from under to support that which is insignificant which is the values propagated by this system of profit to feed the desires of more than and less than of a few, who are themselves caught in allowing the insignificant significance to such an extent, they can no longer direct themselves as life, and thus never live, and thus reap what they sow, which is the self rape of their human physical bodies into a death of no significance, of no transcendence of life, as their beliefs and desires based on object have been made so huge, they are unable to pass through the eye of the needle into what is eternal, as the values of the mind, reflected in the present accepted and allowed system are made too big and thus will not fit through this eye of a needle  into that which is life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to use knowledge and information to say what I mean,

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to - lol- find this mind blowing, I mean what the fuck are we doing?

I commit myself to keep going.

When and as I find myself giving significance to the insignificant I STOP AND I BREATH, I do not allow myself to give significance to the insignificant, as within this I allow starvation and animal confinement, I allow soil devastation, I allow deforestation, I allow rape, I allow fear, I allow anger, I allow inflow as mind and not outflow as life, where I am life one and equal as life here, directing myself with in an absolute purpose as life in oneness and equality as life here.

I commit myself to stopping the giving of significance to the insignificant as what the wants, needs, desires, beliefs, opinions and ideas of the mind as what this is is know -ledge and in-form -ation of what is propagated and sould as a mind consciousness system one and equal to what is propagated and sould by a system allowed and accepted on this earth that places a hierarchy of separation on what is unconditionally given , the support of what is significant , life, here.

It is time to clean up the mind , to fit earth through the eye of the needle through establishing a system of equality and 

Equal Money System.

The soul of money

Day 63 walking the ordinary

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that all blame and spite are a defense to hide fear of loss.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that my thoughts are a manifestation of my fear of loss leading to emotions and feelings as reflections of how I have separated from self honesty, where self honesty is myself one and equal to life as what is best for all, and thus emotions and feelings and thoughts are the story of my separation from myself.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize the back chat of my mind is a composition of the chapters of my own accepted and allowed separations.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear facing the illusion of my emotions , thoughts and feelings, believing them to be real, when these emotions, thoughts and feelings only reflect where I am not equal and one to breath, where I am not existing in self honesty as self honesty being what is best for all, and this best for self, within this I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear my own fear.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that I need not fear being what is best for all, that I need not fear the voice of spite within or without, as the voice of spite and blame only indicate  the absence of self honest common sense, where all that there is is to look and to listen in common sense with practical looking and listening equal and one with breath here, as nothing can be lost, but that the endless back chat of thoughts and the rises and falls of emotions and feelings would make it appear to be so, yet this is the illusion and thus the separation from myself here, physically here, one and equal to all that is here, as what is here is life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see that righteousness is the demand of the thoughts and emotions and feelings to be validated, as this is the illusion in and as separation from what is best for all within myself, where the illusive as mind cannot perceive the whole as it moves in singularities, and thus will only create conflict and friction as it meets another, as one singularity believing itself to be all that is meets another singularity believing itself to be all that is, not realizing itself as a separation in and as a singularity, will create friction and conflict, which is what presently exists as the abuse on this earth as self interest and greed, promoted by a few in control of their own self interest and greed as singularities unaware of the whole, and thus unaware of themselves as life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to remember breath in every moment , to remember that it takes many ordinary small steps to become  the extraordinary and the extraordinary is a collection of the ordinary, and within this I must remind myself of the ordinary, where I can slow down and enjoy the ordinary and realize that the bling of consumerism is the carrot that makes the extraordinary appear to be able to be bought and not walked, and even suggests what the extraordinary appears to exist as instant gratification, thus I allow myself to separate myself from actually becoming extraordinary, as I can only become extraordinary if I walk and exist as the ordinary, the small baby steps that accumulate into self honesty.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see that worry is not the walk of the ordinary.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see that blame is not the walk of the ordinary, where I remain in breath one and equal to here speaking in common sense of the whole no matter what spite and blame arises in defense, as defense, as spite and blame are label and accusation only and not being here in practical common sense of what is best for all.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to listen to the conscious mind as thought and realize it is the negative cloaked as the positive.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize emotions and feelings as self pity, where a longing exists as a belief that something has been lost, yet the self as life is not in fact accepting and allowing the walk of the ordinary, taking the breath time to walk in common sense here as what is best for all.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that when I am in spite and blame I am no longer existing in the physical, directing myself through the ordinary steps of clarity as what is best for all, and instead am stuck in wanting to win having lost sight of here in and as the ordinary common sense of considering what is best for all instead of reacting in fear, where fear reveals self interest as it is the separation.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the ordinary is self embrace as humility where nothing is expected as gain, as there is only clarity in the moment as what is best for all, and this needs no spite or blame or reaction, only direction within breath and self honesty as what is best for all, the principle of oneness and equality, where all spite and blame is myself as spite and blame is separation from here, this moment of an ordinary step, small, quiet and forgiving as life, as what is best for all.

I commit myself to realize that this ordinary step in this moment is all I can be, here, one and equal to breath.

I commit myself to realizing that this one step at a time appears ordinary, this breath here, and do not allow myself to become spiteful and full of blame, as when I become this I am no longer here, but imagining the loss of some grand illusion.

I commit myself to breathing and walking the ordinary.

I commit myself to slowing myself down to recognize the humble ordinary directive of breath, where breath is like the cleanser of spite and blame in bringing myself back into the humbleness of self embrace as self honesty as life as what is best for all, in common sense of spite and blame being  a desire to win in the confusion of the singularity of the mind, as what has been cultivated by a system of energetic gain in separation of the self directive principle of oneness in equality as what is best for self is best for all.

The storm of the mind

The Infinity Secret

Seeing through the eyes of the mind