Day 701 Revisiting paper work. Remembering to slow down and become practical.

I notice that I get anxious when I think of dealing with the paper work systems. I have an idea, in opposition to my reality within this. Why? Because in my reality I have done a lot of paper work, and managed to walk through it, even correcting mistakes. I have created a relationship of anxiety  in tandem with this. One movie I watched inflates this fear. It was the movie Brazil.

In the movie Brazil, much of the paper work is automated. One day a fly gets caught in the typing mechanism and a letter is changed causing a person by the new name to take a fall and lose their livelyhoods. Thus, I have a fear of systems in the paper work world.  On some level I sense the lack of responsibility within the system. In relation to this, I have never trusted administrators. And yet, administrators are people, and they can relook at things and instead of resisting ways through paper work,  can change things and find solutions that allow no harm and sustain structures that benefit everyone. It is not a one-size-fits-all scenario. 

Movies that  go to the extreme of gloom and doom, as our media has become a control mechanism, use emotions to polarize perception into ‘ what if’  scenarios that lack all respect for practical steps in consideration of solving problems in such a way that a person functions in society.  Even as I write these words, being structurally clear within my words is difficult. I notice I have to use a lot of words to say something that is really very simple.

My experience with systemic paperwork is different from my imagination. My relationship to paper work is that it requires me to fill in the slots with information. I have done this many times, it usually takes much less time that my idea about doing it. I allow a polarized and inflated idea slow me down, creating an emotional lag that takes me away from the practical application.

Paper work is information communication, that is all. Because of this, it means to slow down and look at the information and order it in a way that causes no harm. It is to ground the information into being practical, balancing out the ledgers, so that things are clear.  I also realize that If I organize the information, I am then ready to do the paper work that is a record of my actions. 

Also, in the process of grounding myself more within structuring paper work, I have realized that realizing what I do can be known. In this moment, it begs the question a to why children are not taught about recoding money transactions, as this is a math, and within a family, not too hard to organize. The only reason not to do this, is that one does not really want to look at what one does.

Thus, by degree, the lack of being responsible, only mirrors the emotional values used to direct instead of the practical on this physical practical world. 

Personally, this would mean that when something is not working, I am essentially not focused here, and instead I am in some meta-physical construction of value judgement within myself. And why? Because the physical world is right in front of me, it is right here, and my relationship to it, is either in consideration of it, as the means of life, or myself in separation from it acting in self interest as ideas, beliefs and opinions, based on class, race, nationality, or, borders of self interested and drawn values accumulated from a past of ritual defining my values, that I have allowed to become greater than the real world around me.  My morality in self interest, defined in every word I speak and every move I make as the information that I have allowed to program the physical that is the means of my existence here on earth, when not focused here, in the practice of living, will not fit into life. This will cause consequences that harm through a lack of consideration. I am running in time and not equal to life, to what is outside of time, as what withstands time, as what is eternal. This would mean, as has been said many times, that time is an illusion.

I realize in the years I played violin that what I practiced, how I did it, with every move, would inform my actions. And that if I did not check the structures I had built that would become well known, they would begin to run in an automated way. I had to not only know the structure and move with it with ease, I also had to use the structure, or cross reference the structure, which could be done in an instant. There were times when I missed something and I had to go back and check everything carefully. I had to find the glitch.  When things were clear, I could move with ease. When I was within this state, then when encountering new things, I could change with them, or note what I missed and correct it. Also, within this, find my place within a moment of not understanding, quickly. This is how important structure is, a clear and sound structure. This is the accumulation of  a perfect practice, with presence and awareness of what one is doing.

How we are, within our world is the same. How things work and our relationships to things, can be clear. If we take the time to understand this, we can work with things in such a way that we realize mistakes, or a need to slow down and realize new things that we had not encountered before, living in such a way that such moments only enhance our awareness of the values in this physical world that are creation.  We can become equal and one in standing as life, as the value being life. It really is not so far away from us, because it is right here, in plain sight.

The illusion is but a wisp of separation as what is constant is the substance of life in everything that is here. 

When it comes to paper work. I can organize and record my actions. Any fears about this, are ideas, beliefs and opinions. The way out of this is to slow down and walk what I have practiced and align it to reality.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not immediately slow down and breath when and as I find myself facing paper work.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not say to myself that I can become slower, as in taking the time to be within care of the small within and as doing paper work.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that paper work is a simple math in many ways and thus, I can as with all things, slow down and realize the measure, and form a clear awareness of what I am doing to make sure things are clear though checking the parts that make the whole.

When and as I find myself  moving into anxiousness about paper work I stop and I breath, and I walk the ordered steps to cross reference and check what I am doing until I feel that what I am doing is clear, and to realize that should I make a mistake there is only moving into correction, and more often as I have experienced in life, the same mistake more than likely would not be made again as this is how we learn, thus a mistake need not define who and what I am.

When and as I find myself reacting with an emotional value about doing paper work, I stop and I breath and I slow myself down, and I see, realize and understand that this is an emotional lag from my own past acceptances and allowances of ideas that ore of fear about possible ' what if' scenarios and instead to realize I am here.

When and as I find myself fearing the system, I stop and I breathe, and I see, realize and understand that the systems are composed of people, and that more than likely, people would rather find solutions and minimize problems,  as this is the real nature of life.

Day 534 Seeing the patterns of administrators.

I was at a meeting last night, and I find that I react to administrators. I can bring myself back, but the reaction happened. What I find, is that the meeting with the administration has conversations where the speakers continually qualify with statements such as “ let’s be positive here, let;s find something positive” and then the conversation changes about all the “ wonderful “ things being done, which ends up taking half an hour, this period of qualification, and the time is gone.

Smoke and mirrors eating up time; a distraction, to not take the time to look at the whole and investigate consequence in total. In all it is not that the structure is bad, it is that it addresses consequence without going back to the starting point.

Then, the meeting has to come to an end because the room is only available for so long, and the janitor has to go home.

Anyway, after the administrators left, the parents came together and talked, and then there were individual conversations. Despite all the talk, when the administrators where there, that painted a picture of care and effort, the individual response of the parents was that the schools cannot do anything, they cannot take care of these children.

But at this point, the parents are enjoying the community, and talking away filled with hope, but it is a false hope, they simply found a place to vent, and that one movement of venting appears to appease, when nothing has really happened.

I, as I initially reacted, in a moment in the beginning, had to breath and slow down, and realize the physical moves in a certain way. One has to walk the steps as these steps take time. Steps taken in consideration of what has been accepted and allowed, and the movement of common sense and solution, and how a human is formed, must be stood as, unwavering.

One woman came up to me, and generally people were very friendly,  realizing the desperation of their situation. At the end, while the general meeting was going on, there was a statement made, of “ we need to look outside the box.”  All this means is that the windows are there, the understanding that solutions must be outside the existential box.  Solution is always right in front of us, it is only belief that shuts insight out. But, just as the administration clogs with details, this ability at detail, can also be used to walk outside the existential box of limitation, by using common sense and walking the details.

So, I am going to write self forgiveness on my reaction to administrators, my aggravation that i have to sit in the molasses of justification composed of details that are not good or bad, simply of a limited construct that misses overall the point of itself, and that is to build a child to enable that child to function in this world in ways that are aware within and without instead of consumed with a chaos of details that lend no awareness, in balance, of the inner structure of understanding being equal and practical in common sense of physical reality. Each part of a fabric, the fabric that is this earth, must become aware of itself as this fabric, because this is what creates a strength at each point of the fabric of earth, that is strong, insightful, steadfast, considerate, stable, in balance and directive, and as such able to move in ways that do no harm. It is the solution, and it is the way out of the chaos of pollution, poverty, economic stress, and inner turmoil.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have the thought that an administrator is a conman.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that administrators are idiots

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to lose my patience with administrators, who are people.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to allow my past, that had no patience, that became within statements such as “ idiot” and “ conman” to be the expression of myself as a thought, and as such to not realize that I was judging without looking at consequence and taking the time and steps to balance the detail of what is here out in ways that gave direction in understanding into and as solutions.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to react as a belief that I had no power to stand in common sense, simply looking at reality and the ability of men to pay attention to detail, and to realize the construct of details attended to, and to bring this back down to earth, in common sense , to direct, in detail, what walks into solution, with a stability that faces all objections within the principle of what is best for all is best for self.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to judge another, based on limited criteria.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand when and as I find myself becoming a judgement, where I limit my perception based on ideas that build barriers and borders instead of remaining here, equal and one in common sense of physical reality, as it is here that I am as a physical being, and as such, it is only here as this that I can direct myself.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that my judgements are based on a morality taught, a detail in relation to the cultural bubble as the place i was born, in a hegemonic system trying to control the same behavior that i have accepted and allowed that becomes blame and spite in self interest, living the days of my life in believing that a moment of venting my own accepted and allowed beliefs is a gain, when it is more of the same, as it is myself not looking to the whole and realizing that the only way out of a chaotic system of such limited inner construction that lacks connection and community with all detail of how physical existence functions, that I have separated myself from common sense, and my reactions are myself trying to force what i believe within, onto the without, which cannot work, as my existence is dependent on the physical, which, is to realize that even if one believed in a life after death, it does not matter, because at this moment I am here, a physical being here, and there is no reason not to create a world where the physical fabric of existence is of a working order that maintains and cares for this means of expression in ways that do no harm and allow full potential in all physical reality, period.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that in the moment where I become heavy within physically, I am moving as a slow heavy emotion, of spite and blame as i am blaming, as in pointing out lack, and then calling it a name, instead of looking at it in it’s detail, and then instantly becoming a directive towards that detail in what would become a solution, to understand the conscious presentation of what is being looked at, used, and to take this part and place it within the whole, to balance this out in common sense, in ways that build a social fabric that is strong as each point, as each man, woman and child, being equal in measure within with the without as the physical world, as this is the way and the means of creating a social fabric that creates and supports and cares for a physical world in ways that are considerate of life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become an emotion of believing myself to be unworthy, as in unable to address the storm of limitation and separation as mind, composed of the conscious expression of singular detail, the subconscious the accumulation of beliefs and opinions and ideas based on family tradition - this based on generative pasts in culture, religious belief, gender divisions, class ideas, environmental developments - all of which have also created a unconscious mind that is the total limitations as divisions and limited acceptance as conquests of definitions used to define and label and direct in separation from practical reality as the physical -  accepted and allowed by men who are lost in a fantasy world of idea that has become greater than that on which it cannot live without, which is the physical world.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to sink within as a physical sensation, where I go into judgement, as a resistance to facing here, in common sense, as I have not practiced this, as I have allowed limited self definitions and also, hide in embarrassment because on some level I am aware of what it is that I do, because I accepted and allowed limited values to define me, instead of standing in common sense of physical reality, with and as every breath of life that is the gift to allow me to express life, here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that my past, one of separation, defines me here, as this past is a construct of a mind consciousness system, that has manifested without, that is of the limitations of the mind, as a belief system that is not equal and one with physical existence as the means of life, here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel overwhelmed within and as addressing limitations and stagnation without, in and as believing this is tedious, when, and I use this at the moment, it is the same and one with, for example, cleaning up a messy room, to simply start taking the pieces that are out of order and organizing them into a form that allows movement with ease, and of which, can change and improve in function as one walked the ordering of one’s immediate existence realizing that each and every part is equal and one with and as me, as an expression of life, here.

When and as I find myself reacting to anything another says, I stop and I breath and I slow myself down and I listen, and I check to see if I am clear, and I address what has been said as the words spoken, into and as what would balance out and direct in ways that do no harm.

When and as I find myself reacting, I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down and I see, realize and understand that the impetus of my reaction is based on my own memorized past, itself composed of ideas based on my own self interest that was built without practical consideration of physical reality, this which allows the expression of myself here as life, and I forgive this past as not in consideration of practical reality, and I walk myself back into a detail that includes the physical and how the human becomes what has been impulsed within, and I see realize and understand that this bears no witness to practical reality, and as such, the thoughts words and deeds of myself as my past, are not good and or bad, per-say, but a heresy of the past, of values in relation to survival based on an idea that I can be lost and die, when what I am as who I am is life, here, and as such there is no place to fall, but into life, the moment of expression being in awareness and equality with the physical as the manifestation of life in expression, here.

When and as I find myself within and as a sinking in my chest area, I stop and I breath, and I forgive the idea of an expectation hoped for, as being this, an idea/expectation as a desire imagined in a moment based on limited details, and I bring this back to self, and see realize and understand this construction as an emotional value and not myself equal and one here and that I am allowing and accepting to define me in separation from equality and oneness, here.

When and as I find myself inferior to here, I stop and I breath and I slow myself down, and I listen to the details of what is presented , and I bring this back in common sense of practical reality  as what does no harm within and as understanding how the physical is a mechanistic system that is visible in form and function, and as such can be understood and directed.

When and as I find myself in fear, I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down, and I listen to the details as the idea presented and I cross reference as much as I am able, to bring the spoken detail presented into and as what aligns with the physical world in practical common sense.

When and as I find myself thinking, having the thought, as “ idiot’ of “ conman” I stop and I breath and I slow myself down, and I see, realize and understand that a con is not possible in a physical world as the manifestation of life, as this life is visible in form and function and as such can be walked into alignment of common sense of physical reality.

When and as I find myself believing that what has been accepted and allowed as limitations within and as men, manifest into a system, I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down and I see, realize and understand that the consequence of this must be walked, and that the tools of self forgiveness, writing and self correction in and with cross reference with and as the physical within the principle of what is best for all, and the ability of myself as a physical being using common sense of life as the very innate nature of myself is here, and as this, with every breath, I can stop and breath, and look here, to find solutions that direct in ways that do no harm.

Day 503 Resource extraction and currencies, A design that weakens the infrastructure of life.

Our currencies must be equal in value across the globe because changes in values of currencies flood a country’s local currency to access a resource extraction  building  service industry, and when that resource is extracted the monetary flow ends, and the service sector no longer has income and meanwhile, the values, the values of the local industry are inflated in relation to that additional income, so across the boards, all salaries have to come down, in relation to the resource and labor creating the values that exist. What happens is that no one wants to level out their income, down size in proportion to the capital of the land, and, the other ordinary capital has been ignored or stopped, because the money from resource extraction done with foreign money ( that is the wealth of the resource and labor of men), raising salaries,  moved the work force into the service of that industry. And, the total capital of the land is diminished. So, on the one hand there is less capital, and on the other, the salaries are all inflated, and the focus has been on the money flow instead of the basic needs flow  production. And, to add to this, instead of money into land stewardship and development, so much of the wealth goes into military development, which is another drain on the capital of the earth, that is not taking care of what produces and cares for the earth that gives what is needed for physical existence to have basic needs. This is really one big mess, and there is no excuse for this what-so-ever. And then the justification begin, they are religion, class, race, nationality, gender, etc. etc. etc. all ignoring common sense of what it means to be physical, which is life information, which is creation, what can only happen HERE.

So, it is like we created a limited box, and then we have a mental image as a projection of a reflection of that limited box, and we believe the projection is real. And, depending where one is in the hierarchy of what holds the limited box in place, we gather in peer groups, and our words are equations that are in relation to that perspective that is of limited insight, where inference is used through accepted traditions that no longer remember the reason for the tradition and turn that tradition into an artifact, an art of fact that has a starting point of limitation. And so, a mind con-science system is built that is in separation from reality, from practical physical existence. And this projection, because it is not equal to the physical, and requires sustenance, consumes the flesh, showing the state of dis-ease with and as life, as the physical being a value, being life in formation, in expression, here.

So, we project a “ good” as a happy picture, and we suppress the “ bad” as what would open our insight back into common sense of reality, as the physical. I mean, the tool of the mind, can be a reflection of a common sense of physical reality, which is equality and oneness with and as creation, as the information of the physical.

If we look at a justification within creating a Living Income Guarantee as an idea that there are those who do not work, we must realize that a Living Income Guarantee will stabilize the de-stabalizing that  mixed currencies create, that in turn puts people out of work, and disrupts production and creates administrations that are in fear of loss of income, that then supports armies that purport to stabilize but end up doing the same thing that caused the problem in the first place, but the military is really to hold the inequality in place. And the inequality, is based on an idea of self definition that was held as a structure but did not consider all of self as a physical being, as a starting point. It is all an idea of a more than done in comparison only, instead of realizing that it is being here, in common sense of the physical as life in formation as creation, which is the value, the value being self in expression as life, here. Unfortunately, we have lived as an image in mind only as being more than life,  a judgement being more than life, creating war and destruction instead of one of stewardship and respect for that which is life in formation as the physical, this which allows us to become equal and one to and as life, here, to stand equal and one with creation, as the physical, as what we are. Unequal division and conquest is a rejection of life.  Taking from Peter to pay Paul is a separation from life. Fearing to stand up within the present administration systems is  a crime against life. All it takes is to implement a Living Income Guarantee to allow a system transformation into the bodies of men, to become stewards of life, meaning the ability to choose what is best practice. I read, that if just 5% of people do this, it will begin.

It means a divestment of pensions from fixed sectors, inhibiting change, and placing pensions within the profits from freely given resources, where the values as the wealth created from these freely given resources is circulated back to the life, as the labor of all men, to be stewards of the physical formation of creation, as what creation would be in all common sense. It means understanding that our present hierarchy is a structure that focuses on perspectives, meaning, one section structures various parts of infrastructure, and that not one point of this is more than another. Just because one learns to work with the symbols of resource movement as digits and letters, to organize, does not make them more than, say, the person that remains on the ground, organizing a garden directly. I mean, we all know that professors can talk up a structure, but place them in physical practice and they hardly know how to move themselves. And yet, they cannot exist without the other.

Support a Living Income Guarantee, to create an infrastructure that respects all life, realizes the value is life, and begins the journey of structuring earth in equality and oneness with the value being life.

                                 Living Income Guarantee

Day 349 A full self in the words, here?

I am working on a text and I suddenly realize within trying to make the words be me, as in hearing, hereing every word that all this roller coaster stuff is going on. My market of marks, my bills of sale, where I souled myself, where I have more than the story I am directly telling. A story of self judgement I hope no one sees because it is where I don’t want to face here. it is where I am afraid to be revealed, it is where I reject here, it is how I separate from the words directly, it is where I suppress, hold back, do not move with here. All manner of fear.
I have to remind myself that here moves, here breaths, here is being and how being here can be seen and realized. It is not to fear. I’ll have to practice jumping into here - so to speak.
If I don’t face my own marked fears, how can I see and barter with the fears of others? To be and become a barter that is best for all, as what is best for self is what is best for all?

                                          I " lie" is an omission of equal consideration of all life.

So, I am reading this script and as I notice all the reactions within working with what I am trying to say as I have talked with teachers, families, administrators where the conversation ended abruptly, where there were reactions, as the person went from looking straight at me, to down casting their eyes, or unfocusing their eyes here, where there was no longer a presence of and as them moving with me, as though a field of a lesser self, a protective self, a defending self , a “ half” self became the voice, like the models in New York becoming a substance of a lesser presence- so to speak. I look back at these reactions and I see realize and understand that I am doing the same within me, as though I have a perpetual picture show that manifests as pictures - if I slow myself down enough - and move within as a sinking away from here, a rejecting movement from here as adivision of self into a fear of loss, a judgement of not being good enough, upheld by the memories as moralities of the cult of separation that is this system of inequality, an outward manifestation of what each of us has accepted and allowed within. And then the positive that is a justification of the fear, that comes raging forward, excited shaking ever so slightly seeming, tense, like the zombies in the movies, like one is in some kind of orgasmic state and believes this will lead to a bullseye, a bullish act, and when the miss is the outcome in this dream, this separation, confusion ensues, the register then checked. Somewhere in the movement of this it is realized that self did not consider practical common sense of the physical world, but the habit is the personification as communication and not a “ full self” in common sense here.

And I have been doing this for so long, it will take slow careful practice, not to become frustrated with, not to make huge, as the previous acts are making separation huge, mistakes. But, to see them as the solid development of realignment into and as self responsibility, self direction, self awareness. It is like inverting the information and knowledgeaccumulated as the divisions into judgements and to see how these constructs have taken parts of self that are not good or bad, and stopped watching the flow of life in totality, here. It is like knowing there is something wrong but trying to use accumulated data that is limited to find the cause of the “ wrong”, when it is the limitation as the data that missed the total action as the physical of the anecdotal action from which the data was selected. Sound like the game our government plays, carefully selected data, that disallows some movements of the physical that contradict the wanted outcome of profit, through shortening the duration of studies, of monitoring the anecdotal, to avoid un profitable outcomes, an absolute crime against life, destructive of self and earth and thus the children unborn, the animals unborn, the trees not yet breathing, moving to provide oxygen. Profit before life stops life and the effects are everywhere, in every town. The presence of drugs and alcohol are a testament to this.

So, as I practice this script, as I write this out here, I have to bring these self insecurities back to self, these separations into and as fear ( that do not an action of self equality and oneness here, as self forgiveness, make) to see where I am allowing this and where the other is allowing this and to correct within and as what is sound as the expression as the interaction as the physical as life here, to see realize and understand the only choice is self expression in and as life here, that this would move with ease, thus there is no need to force, thus there is no need for taking anything personally the only “ re-action” is (self) correction within and as what is best for all. It is like practicing playing a note in tune, like moving from a point of no desire, as an acceptance of here, the physical. Each of us can only do this for ourselves, as it should be, as this is a gift to enjoy, here. Does this mean I am here? no. I can already see there is a lot to practice. lol. My feet need to learn to run along the track of life, as all of me here, this that is the sound of equality and oneness to and as life here, the actual physical world the “ sign post” showing the way, where disease is the separation from life.

Day 295 Rebellion, Protest is Not Practical Change

Rebellion, Protest.
Any entity, voice or suggestion of rebellion, protest, or petition will not change what is unacceptable as it is not an act of change, it is an act of complaint, blame and spite. Huge crowds of people standing before a government building screaming “woe is me” is not an action that manifests change. It is asking the cause of the abuse to change, and since the cause of the abuse, the limiting laws and actions that bring the frustration and lack are what has been placed into practice, is the very from as government and system created by the people, this is like asking the people who have power -power that was given within a system of inequality, where money determines food and shelter needed to live in dignity - to represent existence and not grab more for themselves, that do not realize what they are as the mind, as consciousness functions, to stop and give up what they believe as the only way they are going to survive. And they do not, had they, this world would be different.
To have created a system where systems take care of each of us, instead of standing within and as our own common sense power as life, is to have abdicated ourselves as life, because we stopped moving as life, stopped looking at life, stop being life. Thus blame and spite for what exists, directed towards a governing body that is acting in self interest is not going to bring about any change. All this will accomplish is a tightening of control, where those in positions of power will hold onto that power without any consideration for anything else but themselves.
I think of facing a school committee here. Our schools are public corporations, created by the people for the people to ensure that what is for the common good comes before profit, which means, since profit is here as inequality monetarily, that it is acknowledged that profit through money is what exists as this system, and yet the governing body as the elected executives that represent the people as the enactment of what is for the common good: this is the school committee, have taken on the responsibility for the people, the people within the community having a responsibility to stand and to share any new technologies with the executives as the school committee that have stood to represent the public corporation as the schools, within practices that are for the common good of the people, to ensure that profit ONLY is not what is practiced.
What is interesting, in my local school committee is that most of the committee is composed of educators within the system and ex-educators. There are very few people in the committee who are not within or have not been within the public school educational system. ( Sound like the swinging doors of Congress and BIG business?)
So, as a citizen, it is my responsibility to present what I have discovered with my local public corporation.
But this is blocked. One reason is that the committee is so overloaded with paper work that they know nothing else, anything outside of the paper work agenda seems too much, as the paper work needs to be completed.
Another issue, is that this system believes itself to be the ONLY source of knowledge, anyone coming in and suggesting something else from without the system, is considered a threat to the “ego” of the system, as in the system not having done what this system represents, and this system does not want to lose its status for fear of losing its profit. All the personnel on the school have come and offered their services as something they are selling, their skills, and it is up to the school committee to realize which skilled people to place with the public corporation, for which they give a salary to, as the school personnel are “profiting” from their services, and thus this is not profit ONLY, yet since money is needed to survive they must receive some profit, or they will not be able to place food on the table and a roof over their heads.
Within this scenario, anything that suggests that their services can be improved is to suggest that they need improvement, and this would mean changing, and this might mean losing their profit/salary, which means losing their ability to place food on the table.
So, collectively this school personnel “group” are going to ensure that they remain with their power, as each is in fear of losing their profit. This fear is so big that common sense is secondary, and thus clouded.
It is always about money, so the reverse is actually what is lived within the order of the law presented. The profit ONLY is reality an the movement within sharing and living, what is for the common good is second. This is life in reverse.
What I find amazing - and this is an emotional blame/spite reaction within and as me. which I have to work on, is that many of the “educated” members of my community complain about how my local schools are ineffective, and yet the school administration blabbers on about how they are doing a good job, that they “believe they are doing a good job”, the best job they can. So, there is a difference of opinion, and when someone stands up and questions this, they are immediately shut down and considered negative.
Reminds me when my husband was about to commit suicide. I called his male friends, thinking that they would be able to say what i was trying to say in a way that would reach my husband. I even called his family and his boss, and all that happened was that I was considered to be paranoid, negative. In the end he killed himself. And I remember seeing, like a “cloud” like a mirage around him, and I did not understand what this was. And he seemed to be “shaking” a lot, ever so slightly. This had stopped, he had calmed down, and yet that last day, the day before he died, he walked in the door and this “shaking thing” was there again - it really is like a subtle oscillation, and I knew everything had been lost, that we were back at square one. I was so upset, I just stopped within myself, and said, that i had to calm down before I could take any action. Little did I understand the severity of this, as the next day he was gone.
So, it is the same with the system, a collective of individuals all existing in fear of survival, in fear of losing that which has been made into an absolute need to exist, which is a piece of paper as money, as what we sell ourselves for, in order to survive. Where when we have a place on the grid, anything that is perceived to be a threat to this, is shut out, ignored, pushed away, and new laws are placed to prevent loss, to suppress loss, to maintain the profit for the individual as the individual is who it is that does this, with prettysounding words of justification, and meanwhile the total structure is not looked at, only the cloud of self interest as survival, this fear, with a justifying voice of supposed goodness, these two the very separation from the common good, the “what is best for all.”
It is not that with some patience, what is here can be understood, it is that the fear is too great, the fear is the monster under the bed, the fear distorts reality to the point where the justification is made real, to hide the fear. Questions can be asked that interrupt this fear, but the tenacious, and these are usually the ones that have the highest salaries, simply become more reactive.
Asking a hierarchy of individuals, those divided into fear and happy face presentation, to change is like asking someone to give up their food and their shelter, especially within a system where money determines life. The ones who have abundant money, that benefit the most, they are going to have to give up power and all their possessions, of which they cannot possibly use at once.
This is why the structure of the system must change, as what exists creates fear, and thus does not work. cannot work, will never work, and asking this form to change itself, when it is composed of many not being able to see anything else, will, obviously not work. The blueprint of fear of loss and the action of self interest are too busy being held onto in desperation, as how fear acts. If you have ever taken a lifesaving course, and had to save someone from drowning,, that person will fight for their life, and is they are stronger than you, you must know how to turn that body around and lock the arms in such a way to suspend them from behind until they calm enough to start floating and thus breathing. I think I was sixteen, and I failed the first time, my instructor was bigger than me, and I did not understand how hard i had to fight. The people who have found a point in the grid of inequality, are not going to just give up their position of security, their life investment.
Rebellion and protest is just going to create more reactive behaviors, and the barricades we stand behind to protest will only be placed further and further away. And I understand that this has happened at the White House in Washington. The barricades are further away, and the army stand guard against its own people. The landscape is the people against the state, that is the picture, that is the reality.
The solution is to stand up and place a new system through a collective vote, as it is the people who have formed this system, and thus it is the people who must stand and change this. In a way, what is here on earth is a systemic public corporation, it is the cooperation of the collective as the human, as the “public”. It will take an “army” of the collective to realize a change, to actually walk, in detail the structure and form needed to end this drama of screaming mobs and protecting self defensive hierarchies who have managed to get the profit.
This reminds me of my local school district again. The superintendent is hired by the school committee ( this body representing the public “common good”) and this superintendent handles the money, which means this administrator can decide that he needs a raise and thus give himself one, which means that he can decide that he is doing a good job, and give himself a raise. THis actually happened here, during a supposed “override” the superintendent said the school needed money for the budget and asked the community to vote in more money for the schools, and then promptly gave himself as raise. And this, in the face of private salaries not growing over the last 15 years. That action of that superintendent, did it consider the community within this lack in other areas of the community, did that superintendent consider the stressed out parents of thechildren in the households of parents whose cost of living was increasing and salaries or profits were not? Does this person who represents the children, consider the children? As what he/she stand for? No they did not, they considered their own survival only, and not what was for the common good of the community.
So, those government administrators are not going to consider anything else but their own survival, and any questioning, is, as I said, just going to create a greater divide, a bigger distance. Which begs the question on another level, what is going to pay for the bodies standing in the “no man’s land zone? Your are, you the protestor, you the blamer, you the rebel. This is not the means to stop the abuse of inequality.
What exists as inequality, was built brick by brick by brick by humans, the generations of humans that have been here on this earth. Thus, it is the collective, in organization, that must stand and realize a systemic change, through networking and structuring and voting in a system that never allows what presently exists to happen again because it does not work. Unless the system takes care of life, absolutely, it is not a functioning system. And the one we have has been going on for so long, and it is not working, it keeps trying to force what it is to work, and naturally this is not working. It will never work.
And, since what is here has been created by generations of men, no one person can say that they did something all by themselves, because they did not. What is here has been built by many, and what has been built is not good or bad, it is simply how what has been built is being used, so, there is much here that is good, and this can be used to begin this journey towards becoming life here on earth, to ensuring that all that is here is cared for with absolute specificity as what is best for what is here.
Waiting for someone else to stand will not work, as self will and must forgive self as life here, I can forgive you, but this will not work, someone else forgiving me for myself will not work, eventually we will all have to realize that the only choice is to forgive one self to life, which means becoming one and equal to and as life. Thus must the illusion in and as this mind system of consciousness, of competition, comparison within a measure of seeking gain, seeking a more than someone else, this action within self as thoughtas the judging that it is, that when compounded becomes emotion and feeling bodies layered within creating dis-ease , which is the physical showing the extent of separation one has become from life in abdication of self as life. All ideas, beliefs and opinions must be looked at for what they are, are they a preference or are they used to compare within being more than something else, are they comforts that are simply habitual that need not really be an experience that define self here?
Obviously, usury does not work as a practice. It is presented as supportive but the outflow of this is really “taking from Peter to pay Paul” it is presenting “giving” but it is really and act of taking, ensuring the ownership of - eventually - everything to that level of competition and desire for more than, which is what greed is, to one person, or a few people. Usury is a system of control, it is not a system that allow self empowerment, self determination, self expression, self honesty with and as life, self responsibility in and as life, this equalizing of self to and as life, being a self realization experience of what life is in fact. I mean if life is what is here that supports everything, would not realizing this be the real ultimate value? The behaviors of earth at present are of conflict and friction, disease, and war, destruction of nature, this all a physical, visibly recognizable outflow of destruction, it is not taking care of this earth, it is not an act of being forgiving as life here.
The waters of this earth should be gentle, soft, clean, life giving, and they are not. They are heavily polluted, stormy, carrying toxins that are suffocating our oceans and our rivers. All of this is through the actions of men in self interested, self ignorant gain. Self ignorance is not being life. Consciousness is the manifestation of ignorance, as this is what separation is, and it exists as a less substantive form than life, in and as energy, and energy consists of poles of positive and negative, spectrums of a singular action in and as separation from what is substantive and this is the sound of life. Thus, self seeking positives, as what is driven as supposedly being positive within the consumerist presentation are limited, blown out of proportion distortions of reality, and this overblown value is in separation from life. This is why it must be understood that everything ( as the warped reality) will be lost should one walk the desteni process, and yet nothing will be lost, it will simply be brought back to life.
The living word is self in equality with life. It is self equal and one with and as life, simply being, ending the chasing of the addictions of energy based behaviors, that will never be satisfied as they are unequal to what is of substance.
The rewards are the end of fear. Is there really any other reason, especially for those of us that live in the west who have some level of stability - that by the way is not real stability- needed other than to remove fear from existence, is not this enough of a realization to stand and participate and build a system that realizes that all life is the value, and that there is no real life until all become self honest, self responsible, self directive, in and as life? Equal Money Capitalism is to make sense of this world, to bring this world back into common sense. The divisions of belief, opinion and idea, and the propagation of needs, wants and desires that are often partial truths coupled with layers of diversions, to avoid facing reality, and to maintain inequality, are the compounds of a just-I-see-loss/justice of loss as a protection and defense system wanting gain in absence of being practical here in common sense of this physical world. The answer, as the reward, is to realize in common sense what functions as what is best for all on this physical planet. The physical world flourishes with clean water, proper nutrients, stable environments. Taking in self interest creates instability when done within ignoring the physical world, and this is the condition of those continents abundant in resource, and indication that this is a system that is not working with life, that is acting in self interest in ignorance of practical consideration of what supports life, within the realization that life is the value.
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Let’s get this done, so that we as life can begin, to realize, see and understand that this world needs to be cleaned up to support the children yet to come, to resuscitate the soils, the waters, the animals and the plants, which is what life on earth is, thus everything that is here is of value, including yourself.

Day 147 The Survivalist Lies of Administrators

Cocoa beans (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Horseshoe crabs (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

So I sit about to write forgiveness and a neighbor shows up at my house too tell of the same pattern, as the behavior of administrators I have seen in a documentary about child slavery within the chocolate industry in Africa and experienced myself within my community. This is  a pattern of human behavior, believed to be unchangeable, that exists on so many levels.

This is the story as I heard this tonight.

Horseshoe crabs:

Horseshoe crabs are harvested for their “blue blood” which has a harvestable form of LAL a compound that fights infection. The medical industry buys the horseshoe crab from people that go out and pick them off the shores of our oceans. In my case Cape Cod.

Evidently, as I was told, these crabs were harvested in bays closer to the mainland, until they ran out. Then another bay where the crabs existed was farmed until the populations of horseshoe crabs were decimated. Now they are harvesting these crabs here on the Outer Cape.

A man comes and collects the crabs and takes them to the facility where this blue blood is taken from the crabs.

The medical facility then believes that these drained crabs are taken back to the place where they were taken from.

But this is not what happens, these crabs are then sold, by the same man who harvested them, to a company that chops them up and sends this to China, to be used as bait for eels.

These crabs are never returned.

Now this man, who harvests these crabs wants to make as much money as possible, within this system of profit, so naturally he is going to get as much money as he can from what he harvests, so he, if he can, will sell these crabs for money. He needs to survive.

So, this oyster man who is telling me all this, because he makes his living growing oysters to sell, he has noticed that one year there were no sea snails or sea slugs on his grant. They have come back, but this year there are no jelly fish. And there are no longer, but one or two, horseshoe crabs. What has also happened this year, is that the oysters on his grant are not growing as well, they remain small.

Now, as I was told, a horseshoe crab is like a “roto till” for the surface of the marsh bottoms, they stir up the muck which sends nutrients into the water, this nutrient then feeds the oysters. Hence, fewer rototillers, less circulation of all the things the waters consist of and as.

Back to the medical industry.

The medical industry blue blood harvesting facility, when asked what happens to the crabs, says they are returned to the place of origin. Which they are not.

So, this oysterman calls the state, and the state says that they know the crabs are being monitored because they have men at the bay ( where this oysterman’s grant is). This oysterman tells me that he says to the administrator that he and the other grant owners are there on their grants during the day and have never seen any government monitor on the bay where they are. The administrator denies this and says that yes, there are people there, they come at night.

Obviously with such a statement , it is an admission of a lie. This administrator knows they are lying and believe if they just say something is true, the person asking will accept this. 

This same action happened within a documentary about child labor in Africa within the cocoa bean industry, where children are forced into slave labor, picking cocoa beans. The executives in Europe deny the existence of this and say they have taken care of this, and the government officials in Africa, say that it does not exist, and meanwhile the man speaking up about this makes a film where he goes to the cocoa plantations and interviews the children, who say they were kidnapped and forced to harvest the beans, with threats that their families will be killed if they attempt to run away. And meanwhile, there are local men, who transport these children across borders for money, so they can survive.

In this instance, in this documentary, the government official, when questioned about the children, says that the children could not possibly be on the farms because the cocoa beans are not harvested at that time of year. This is his answer. His avoidance tactic, flying in the face of what in fact exists. He also says that he talked with another official and was told there is no child labor going on. A string of people sitting at desks, denying what is real, and even making up impossible situations to deny what is presented.

I mean, I am really having a hard time seeing some government official monitoring horseshoe crabs populations at  night on Cape Cod. 

What I am also finding, is that to meet face to face with administrators is becoming increasingly difficult. I guess it is easier to lie on the phone. Remove any opportunity of confrontation. 

Can we point the finger at this man, any of these administrators or horse crab harvesters? They are all trying to make a living and survive in a game of rape the earth to survive, do not look at what the consequences of this rape create because if you do, you might just lose your job. That corporation wants that blue blood, the technicians that take that blood out of that crab want their jobs. They are told a lie by their superior - who does not want to lose his job- to place a happy face on what they are doing and meanwhile this whole chain of command denies what is actually physically happening to this planet. And no one wants to look because they might lose their job.

Meanwhile, the oysters are no longer growing so well.

Meanwhile the children in Africa are given no education, are not taught to understand this world.

All to feed a corporate eye that has a singular vision of profit, without any regard for life.

This pyramid, as this system, is like a blood sucking parasite. And we are all allowing and accepting this, thus we are the creators of our own demise. And it is coming to your doorstep sooner than you think. The organism of this earth that supports us, is being raped without any regard for the life that it is, and obviously, we do not understand that this physical world is what is real.  We are told by other kinds of administrators that we will go to some heaven. A heaven that no one has ever seen, just like the administrators do not see what is actually going on. Lies on top of lies, ignorance on top of ignorance.

The only way to stop this, is for a very large group to stand and to say stop, through realizing the value is life. That this physical world is life, is the gift of life and thus is here to support life.

An Equal Money System is a means to use the tool of money, to distribute what is freely given on this earth to sustain what is needed to support the life that is here. This will stop all this abuse, as that administrator will no longer have to lie to survive. Equality will allow best practices to step forth, practices we know sustain this earth, as this is what each and every one of us wants. We know this is what needs to be done. We have been programmed to survive before what we know sustains. In order for this to happen, each of us must stand and support a system that places the value on life before profit.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear, stepping away from media broadcast politics to see, realize and understand that media supports a profit based system, and thus will only present what support itself, as the ones with the money, that control money and thus resource are not interested in best practices, life sustaining practices, as such practices are not profitable, such practices do not allow division and conquest to serve profits.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that all animals have a purpose as part of an organism of life, and thus when parts of this organism, called earth, are raped, where the sustaining of this organism as best practice does not allow as much money to be made for the individuals within this system to survive, then the practice that is inconsiderate of this earth will be the choice made, where it is too expensive for a government agency to have monitors actually physically checking what is being practiced, as this does not allow the division and conquest as abusive practices to exist, where even government agencies hide behind such statements, as “there is no proof” because no money is being funneled into such means of study, as this would expose what is actually happening and profits would be disturbed, and thus if it does not allow support survival, and costs of clean up, or returns to a natural state are too costly, then what does not make money, make a profit is simply ignored, where the government agencies are actually the guards of the gates of profit as within this system of survival what pays the bills is money and not what is best for all, not what sustains life, respects life as this does not ignore, but works with and respects life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that the only thing to stop this system of abuse to this earth, and thus all that is here, is to stand and to change this world into a system that supports what is the value, which is life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that from day one, I have been programmed by the same system of control through social structure, through education, through religion, through media, through text books, through taking in knowledge and information without any actual physical interaction or awareness development of what is actually physically happening on this earth to become an ignorant slave despite my capacity as life , and instead am fed what supports a system of inequality known as capitalism, and thus I cannot trust anything that I have been taught, and must remove what i am as mind, must stop the voices in and as my mind, as this is a program to serve the interest of a few and not life, which is so obvious when the condition of this earth is looked at in common sense, even locally where one lives.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that best practices are known, but are denied study as this would expose what is actually physically happening on this earth and thus put an end to practices that are abusive, and thus put an end to this rape of this earth and the illusion of superiority of a few.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to not see , realize and understand that our children have the ability at a young age to learn languages very fast, an ability lost as they mature, and thus something is lost as our children grow and move through a supposed system of education.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that children are developed according to what they are exposed to, and thus a lack of development is the cause of a lack of ability, and thus within this system of greed and profit, any child that is not developed to full capacity is so because it has not been given what is needed for such development, and thus each of us are to blame for any child that starves or spends a childhood in slavery picking cocoa beans is such because the human has allowed and accepted a system of profit that does not support life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that what has been taught is what controls, and what controls if a system of inequality, a system of profit, thus I am a product in thought, word and deed, to believe that this system is all that there is, as this is what would be programmed into and as me to ensure the continued existence of this pyramid of separation from the life that is here on this earth and what in fact is happening on this earth, where unless I stop and realize this, the consequences of this will arrive on my doorstep sooner than I think, as all I am is a receptor of the images placed on the screen of the television to ensure my continued service and lack of awareness of this physical world.

I commit myself to investigating what I am as a human, as what is programmed into and as me, that I have accepted and allowed that disables myself as life, to stand up and see in  common sense what I exist as emotionally, as what the focus of myself is within this world that takes me away from understanding and concerning myself with what is happening on this planet that I would not want to happen to myself or my children, or any animal and planet that is a part of this organism of life known as earth that sustains me here.

I commit myself to seeing, realizing and understanding, that my obsessions and possessions are of ideas, beliefs and opinions,, desires wants and needs that are no concerned with this earth and th very substance of myself as life, as I am not aware of my human physical body, and must ask a doctor about what ails me, as I have no sense of my physical self, thus do I abdicate myself as life, to another person on this planet that is themselves caught up within a system of survival, and thus give to me what is profitable, as all that exists supports profit before life, thus, I cannot trust a system of enslavement in any way, and must investigate what is presented myself, and within this understand what exist within this system where I will discover that this organism of life, known as earth is not in fact being supported, and that the only thing stopping myself is a program of fear, which is myself stopping the program of separation from myself as life within.

I commit myself to breathing, when and as I begin to question what is here, to no longer fear asking the questions even in the face of bullying and ignorance, to realize, see and understand that what is here is being ignored as survival and greed have created a behavior of ignorance that will use any means to, such as blame and spite, to not face what self has accepted and allowed, and knows is unacceptable, rather than face self as life, the very thing feared being faced being the very thing that would set self free to become what is real, self as life, one and equal to life.

I commit myself to breathing, to realizing that I am here, and that the separations into and as mind as what has been taught cannot control me unless, I as life, allow and accept this.

I commit myself to bringing myself back to life, to being what i am, one and equal as life, here, to understand this organism of life called earth, to realign this earth as what practices exist to being and becoming one and equal as life no longer focusing on limited parts as what the mind blows out of proportion as this is the illusion of the mind, here.

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