Doing My Best Day 724

There was a point within learning to play the violin, where the moment one expanded in ability, one had to move on. It is a point where expansion is realized as having stages, the process moving in a measurable way, It is moving past the moment of awe in a previous expansion and flowing with the whole process of one’s awareness within greater ability, as awareness within what one is doing, focusing on. One becomes comfortable within the process of becoming aware of something, instead of getting locked in to the micro steps of initial moments of expansion, that can create stagnation if the awareness as to how expansion happens has not the experience of the means of expanding awareness as being the steps taken. In other words, one see only the expansion yet has not enough practice in this to see the forest through the trees, as how the practice of placing oneself into new movements and forms is a living practice that has a direct means of growth as greater understanding. 

I have heard the term lately, a lot, as ‘ doing my best.’  This term is bothering me, because I am seeing this as that stage of being in awe of having expanded in one’s awareness yet, the movement is still stagnant in that it accepts a best and revels in it, to the point where there is resistance to continued movement. It is like making the slowing down of a train or state of being into this HUGE HUGE thing, losing sight of the process that lead to ‘ besting’ one’s own personal growth.  It is like to say that one has expanded in awareness and is not yet ready to move into another expansion, which is really an excuse, because one’s life has only so many hours. It is, not wanting to look at what exists, and wanting to control the very momentum around one, in the order of one’s comfort in relation to looking and being aware of reality here. It is wanting to have the whole world move in the order of changing one’s inner construct , or state of being.  Thus, this is a separation, it is a force against who and what one really is, a physical machine that naturally is so able to process information in this real, physical world around us. Thus, the whole idea of ‘ doing my best’ is a subtle contradiction, or counter intuitive state of being in relation to reality.

Today I was looking at this, triggered by realizing a state of being as a memory from my past, and interactions that I have with others, AND a video that came up on FB. The post was about a movie coming out called hyper normalization.  I thought this word relevant to what I had experienced within my own realization to a greater degree ( that has yet more to become aware of) of who and what I am, and this statement I have somehow honed in on, as ‘ I am doing my best.”  

The word hyper for me represents tension, and tension is holding onto something, keeping the strings in a state of tight pressure. It is to say, ‘ I am comfortable here and I am not ready to change this that I have created or allowing myself to move into with understanding, and unless I  have full control I am not going to move forward.” Yet, one is already formed as a physical state, one can focus here, do the real math of here, and become comfortable within who and what one already is! The hyper-tension in living as an idea of being normal, is already a separation from being present. It is an illusion! Thus, being a state of ‘ doing my best’ is an illusion! 

I mean have a look, the stages of grief are a lot, or the same , as the stages of growth. One denies something, fears it because one does not know it, and thus one resists change, and then there is acceptance!  It is the same with improvement, for example, within learning to play an instrument, a physical real, it-is-what-it-is instrument that is not emotional, cannot complain- that is a form as what it is, that works in a very visible and specific way. “ doing my best’ is a statement of separation from one as an instrument of and as life. My physical body is not emotional, when I eat properly, when I listen and pay attention, as FOCUS, here, I can see realize and understand how I expand. I look here. If I do not realize actions that realize this, I do harm.  Really, looking directly at this, means one must face the shadows of resistance to life, within and as our present system without that is a consequence within allowing the denial of and as this!

What I noticed, have noticed, and speak up about, meeting resistance, is how much, and to be specific, teachers say things like “ I am doing my best with what I have” meaning I am doing/directing-myself with the dictates of the state. This is accepting a collective acceptance of a system, a way of doing handed down by people inFORMation ( because the state is people ultimately) and therefor not having to become responsible for myself. This is using the collective to determine one’s self motivation in practice. This is an argument used. YET, when a child does an action that is simply the reflection of what the state ( the collectives acceptance) has handed down via media, as so much hyper-sexualization and has behaviors within such parameters, such as posting a picture of a penis, those very same teachers jump on the individual and counter the action within the individual.  They attack the individual for accepting such actions. They move from the collective reasoning as how they are directed, and yet do not do so with individuals in their care that are simply doing the same as the teachers; modeling/playing out/exhibiting the dictates of the state - as the state, as the PEOPLE- are the ones collectively handing down what one uses, as focuses on, as allows to determine where they are and how they are within a natural ability to expand in awareness of the instrument that is physical that is here, right in plain sight.  The child is simply modeling what is handed-down, as dictated, as allowed, via the media, as a ‘ pornification of reality= we could call hyper sexualization! 

This is classic projection of what one is doing within, onto another, using the collective with self as justification and in one’s immediate environment , when same behaviors come up, jumping to blame and spite and call out by name what another is doing- as though this absolves the self of what self has accepted and allowed, and/or distracting what self is allowing through pointing out the same action in another!  Naturally, when what something is, is called out by name, it no longer has any power- and one need no degree to be able to do this. And, of course, the action, or movement, called out by name, is going to react- just as Rumplestiltkin did when the princess called out his name, he threw a fit, danced around his own fire and burned up! lol. It is amazing how our fairy tales expose our own behaviors! What is real has to be given, so that manipulation cannot be put on the one manipulating as ultimately, it is the one accepting the mis-information ( direction lacking principle of equality- which is to consider all things)  that is not of ‘ right’ action. This is why no one can put Humpty Dumpty back to gather again but the self. 

I have to say, that when I point out this math, because it is a formula, a math. I meet with such resistance to doing the math of this. At the moment it appears as though there is this spin around this, that there is this hyper- state of being that repeats “ I am doing my best’ as a shield of denial. It is hyper/tense/stubborn/resistant and the collective acceptance of this state of GRIEF/ expansion-in-awareness,  has come to be considered as NORMAL.  It is as though we are in a perpetual state of grief, called hypernormalization that actually shows us how we expand and learn, how we can build a momentum in realizing this is how things move, and yet we stand on that line of resistance justifying our own hypernormalization through blaming the dictates we accept and yet jumping on little individual actions around us that are the consequence of a collective acceptance of what is allowed as directives ! This is hiding in the collective and ping ponging between the individual and the collective within what maintains our own acceptance of rejecting ourselves as life.

How is that working for us? What harm and what suppression of life is that manifesting as greater degrees of attention dis-orders in our children? What are we passing down and waiting for someone else to fix, when it is the waiting that is the action holding the separation in place? 

We understand how human development works. We understand that suppression of this sequence in development causes discord with reality, dissonance with reality, and thus behaviors of tension that do not fit into that momentum that leads to self mastery. Everything is known, thus, the statement ‘ doing my best’ is an admission of a choice to not be directed by a principle that is best for all, as in every moment considering all things, taking that which is good, stepping out of the resistance manifest as accepting a dictate from a bunch of people somewhere in a ivory tower that have no real relationship to what is going on right in front of one. This is believing that there is somehow some greater authority than the natural capacity of self to stand in respect of this reality, this practical physical reality that gives the real means of direction within seeing directly here, and knowing within one’s self how one expands in awareness through looking here.  One must stand as who and what one is, a human being, and call out things by name again and again and again, until through all the dissonance this is heard- I mean, is this not what the state does via media and dictates? Is that state not people, as other humans, who cannot possibly know what is happening right where you are, on that piece of ground where one stands. 

What do you want? Do you want to live a healthy, and productive life, with the time and space to have the freedom to understand reality, to enjoy this reality? To step through the view of a storm-in-a-tecup takes self action. When practiced, eventually, one begins to see the forest of memory shadows self has accepted and allowed to direct who and what one is, and can then begin to see the real life, the real forest as the physical, and can no longer accept what is unacceptable, and, at the same time, give direction and/or face the reactions of separation, of ‘ I am doing my best’ and call them out by name to dis-empower the separation and empower the self to stand as what is best for all. This is, after all, the only choice. 

Day 701 Revisiting paper work. Remembering to slow down and become practical.

I notice that I get anxious when I think of dealing with the paper work systems. I have an idea, in opposition to my reality within this. Why? Because in my reality I have done a lot of paper work, and managed to walk through it, even correcting mistakes. I have created a relationship of anxiety  in tandem with this. One movie I watched inflates this fear. It was the movie Brazil.

In the movie Brazil, much of the paper work is automated. One day a fly gets caught in the typing mechanism and a letter is changed causing a person by the new name to take a fall and lose their livelyhoods. Thus, I have a fear of systems in the paper work world.  On some level I sense the lack of responsibility within the system. In relation to this, I have never trusted administrators. And yet, administrators are people, and they can relook at things and instead of resisting ways through paper work,  can change things and find solutions that allow no harm and sustain structures that benefit everyone. It is not a one-size-fits-all scenario. 

Movies that  go to the extreme of gloom and doom, as our media has become a control mechanism, use emotions to polarize perception into ‘ what if’  scenarios that lack all respect for practical steps in consideration of solving problems in such a way that a person functions in society.  Even as I write these words, being structurally clear within my words is difficult. I notice I have to use a lot of words to say something that is really very simple.

My experience with systemic paperwork is different from my imagination. My relationship to paper work is that it requires me to fill in the slots with information. I have done this many times, it usually takes much less time that my idea about doing it. I allow a polarized and inflated idea slow me down, creating an emotional lag that takes me away from the practical application.

Paper work is information communication, that is all. Because of this, it means to slow down and look at the information and order it in a way that causes no harm. It is to ground the information into being practical, balancing out the ledgers, so that things are clear.  I also realize that If I organize the information, I am then ready to do the paper work that is a record of my actions. 

Also, in the process of grounding myself more within structuring paper work, I have realized that realizing what I do can be known. In this moment, it begs the question a to why children are not taught about recoding money transactions, as this is a math, and within a family, not too hard to organize. The only reason not to do this, is that one does not really want to look at what one does.

Thus, by degree, the lack of being responsible, only mirrors the emotional values used to direct instead of the practical on this physical practical world. 

Personally, this would mean that when something is not working, I am essentially not focused here, and instead I am in some meta-physical construction of value judgement within myself. And why? Because the physical world is right in front of me, it is right here, and my relationship to it, is either in consideration of it, as the means of life, or myself in separation from it acting in self interest as ideas, beliefs and opinions, based on class, race, nationality, or, borders of self interested and drawn values accumulated from a past of ritual defining my values, that I have allowed to become greater than the real world around me.  My morality in self interest, defined in every word I speak and every move I make as the information that I have allowed to program the physical that is the means of my existence here on earth, when not focused here, in the practice of living, will not fit into life. This will cause consequences that harm through a lack of consideration. I am running in time and not equal to life, to what is outside of time, as what withstands time, as what is eternal. This would mean, as has been said many times, that time is an illusion.

I realize in the years I played violin that what I practiced, how I did it, with every move, would inform my actions. And that if I did not check the structures I had built that would become well known, they would begin to run in an automated way. I had to not only know the structure and move with it with ease, I also had to use the structure, or cross reference the structure, which could be done in an instant. There were times when I missed something and I had to go back and check everything carefully. I had to find the glitch.  When things were clear, I could move with ease. When I was within this state, then when encountering new things, I could change with them, or note what I missed and correct it. Also, within this, find my place within a moment of not understanding, quickly. This is how important structure is, a clear and sound structure. This is the accumulation of  a perfect practice, with presence and awareness of what one is doing.

How we are, within our world is the same. How things work and our relationships to things, can be clear. If we take the time to understand this, we can work with things in such a way that we realize mistakes, or a need to slow down and realize new things that we had not encountered before, living in such a way that such moments only enhance our awareness of the values in this physical world that are creation.  We can become equal and one in standing as life, as the value being life. It really is not so far away from us, because it is right here, in plain sight.

The illusion is but a wisp of separation as what is constant is the substance of life in everything that is here. 

When it comes to paper work. I can organize and record my actions. Any fears about this, are ideas, beliefs and opinions. The way out of this is to slow down and walk what I have practiced and align it to reality.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not immediately slow down and breath when and as I find myself facing paper work.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not say to myself that I can become slower, as in taking the time to be within care of the small within and as doing paper work.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that paper work is a simple math in many ways and thus, I can as with all things, slow down and realize the measure, and form a clear awareness of what I am doing to make sure things are clear though checking the parts that make the whole.

When and as I find myself  moving into anxiousness about paper work I stop and I breath, and I walk the ordered steps to cross reference and check what I am doing until I feel that what I am doing is clear, and to realize that should I make a mistake there is only moving into correction, and more often as I have experienced in life, the same mistake more than likely would not be made again as this is how we learn, thus a mistake need not define who and what I am.

When and as I find myself reacting with an emotional value about doing paper work, I stop and I breath and I slow myself down, and I see, realize and understand that this is an emotional lag from my own past acceptances and allowances of ideas that ore of fear about possible ' what if' scenarios and instead to realize I am here.

When and as I find myself fearing the system, I stop and I breathe, and I see, realize and understand that the systems are composed of people, and that more than likely, people would rather find solutions and minimize problems,  as this is the real nature of life.

Day 649 What leads is the past information, as what is here as the physical. What is Generation?

I can see the travesty of the refugee system where whole masses of people are running from bombs and destruction as drones and planes fly over and bomb this earth. How in any way does this make any sense?

Human beings can create wonderful things, they are very very capable of doing, of walking small details in small actions to complete something that is amazing, this is how things are built on this world and how things are cared for and understood. We are, we humans, the perfect sensory mechanisms to do this, I mean, a child imitates a smile on the face of an adult in a manner of weeks!

Yet somehow, we have lead ourselves to believe that that smile has another significance other than that organic machine that is able to imitate every single movement of the world in which they have manifested! That smile is nothing other than the physical sensory machine of physicality imitating what it sees/experiences/senses.

If that machine does not have the means to self dis-cover what it is and what it is actually doing, and ideas/beliefs/opinions are created around that movement, a measure, an icon, a morality, then that definition becomes more than what is actually physically happening. This creates a massive separation from reality. And what happens?

The ideas that create the borders become more than the physical expression of life as what this earth is. And, masses of people are moved around, under the guise of what- do any of us really know anymore? These people come from a country that at one time was self sufficient. These people come from a land that has natural resources that are ordered in a way to be owned by a corporation that wants one way for that resource to flow, and that way is to support an illusionary construct of hierarchy where some men, by means of their self defined measure that was LEARNED/ABSORBED/INPUT after they were born as that infant who copied every movement in their world until that ‘ measure’ was given precedence over all other measure. Yet this means that we become what we are exposed to, and we become what we are allowed exposure to, and that when we do not have a measure that is what is best for all, as in a measure that leads to an understanding of what it means to be physical beings on a physical world,  we are in separation from what it is that we are. The default is a combination of past traditions that were really only technical operations to exist on this physical world that we allowed to define us, which is how the separation started; our definitions did not include what we really are, which is the expression of life, that of course must be physical. I mean why create a separation from the physical world into the whole idea of a heaven? This reveals that all religions, were in so many ways, the first tele-visions of separation for those that believed their self definitions were more than another, having lost all sense of life.

Evidently, this happened even before the modern day religions, as the Sumerians and the Babylonians already started the story of Christ, of the child of god, creating a separation into there being one figure head that had a child. The irony is that the leader is the follower, as the leader is really what came before, in many ways, and the information as what came before brought into the child, which happens again and again and again with each generation of physical life on this earth as men. This is to say what leads, is the information that is here as the physical and the awareness that is expressed and passed onto the child. Thus, it is the measure of presence in physical living that is the real ‘ god’ in a way. What we allow to inform us, is what we become. Something of great beauty that can be abused if we all accept and allow it.

The refugees are people, they are life in expression, they are us in another life. They are the means to create heaven on earth. They are the power to put an end to this hierarchy as what people are and are able to be and do. What would be what is best for those lost in the separation as a belief in power, is the real power which is being present and equal to creation, which is the physical.

                  We can stand and become the stewards of heaven on earth, equal and one real-eye-zing the value is life.

Day 509 Facing the Paranoia of the Paranormal

In working with people recently, I noticed reactions within walking a simple process. I realize that the process can seem overwhelming when first presented. One response was, “ I am not as disciplined as you!” another was “ Why can’t the schools do this?” and yet another was “ O, That is a hard one!”  And then afterwards, with a family member, “ you don’t explain this well!” - this being a long rant about what words to use. I didn’t catch the undercurrent, as things are presented within projecting blame, moving what one does not want to face into any facet of reaction, this being screaming a blame, when that scream holds the answer to the problem, or reveals the overall fear. If they are projecting it outward are they really screaming a fear that they believe they lack this, especially when it has to do with slowing down and looking, no matter the context? Is the idea of slowing down and looking always/allways overwhelming at first? I mean, just think of having to learn some new physical action, one has to slow down and place awareness into it. Which means refocusing self. Slowing down and expanding awareness within sensing the measure of something in detail, is the means to an end,  and yet the change to such is like pulling teeth. All manner of resistance comes up. Like an LP record playing and the arm gets caught on the vinyl and drags across the surface emitting a heart piercing screech. I think parents go through this phase within facing change.  How to impart a structured, clear understanding that change is actually a joyful act when done with patience and starting out in small amounts, understanding that the first steps are bumpy, yet the stability is learned with each bump. Without the bumps how does one learn to steady oneself? So, a mistake, is a guide, not a punishment. A mistake leads to the reward of awareness in balance. Conversely, to use mistakes to ascend a ladder is really a crime against life, 

I was so busy trying to steady myself in this storm, I did not listen to the storm. lol.  My starting point was , “oh no, what have I done”. This is a paranoia of the paranormal.  

Day 420 Common sense is in the world, we need only place it into a structure.

I was out in my busy summer community today. I had a moment to talk with two different couples. One man had heard of Bernard Poolman, so we talked and he said he was going to look more into this, which I thought was cool. Another couple who had run a business for years, expressed that they realized there was a need to create a social dividend, a basic income grant that supported people, and what was interesting is that they made a point to say that it had to be enough to provide shelter, enough food and even transportation. Within this, they said that the conversations they had on FB were of disbelief that the American government was not getting to the point of understanding this choice. This second couple, even admitted that those in the ivory tower simply did not want to give up their power and their money. That this position came before a realization that with the amount of automation going on, a system of support must be placed, as this was the only solution. The conversation then went onto talk about the complacency of the American people who had the means to stand and change the system. What I thought was cool about this was that at least when being out in public and talking with people, there appears, from this singular incident, that some common sense amongst people is being expressed.

I also talked with a group of Hispanic people this week. I explained in simple terms, as well as I could, about how we as humans have a natural learning ability that is our common sense, and that this is what enables us to be mutable within understanding the whole of existence, instead of existing within limited dimensions of reality as idea, belief and opinion as mind. One woman was staring at me with these huge eyes, I said to her, is what I am saying what you have wanted to say placed in very simple clear terms, and she looked at me and said, yes. Perhaps it is me, I am no longer so caught in the emotional storm of the mind, and for this I can only thank Bernard Poolman and all destonians and my thanks is to share this as this is the only choice: to give as I have received. 

Our common sense is like the volume of life moving within the violin/instrument of the physical body, where the words are the structural keys to communicate life, kind of like placing a finger on a string to create a sound, a variation of sound, to express here,  if our words answer to a lesser god as idea as picture as mind, then we are not equal to being a clear, fully focused volume of life as common sense here, expressing directly with the physical. The mind, when allowed to be real as a picture of a dimension of here made huge, becomes a judgement of a more than and a less than when followed as reality, creating a bad that is rejected, thus creating polarities and division from what is real, the physical, life. Thus the segment, as idea, must be brought back and placed with physical reality in every breath to equalize self with life, with the physical, to aid in becoming an absolute purpose as life, here. As this, it would be realized that there is no such thing as rejection of life there is only the volume of what is best for all, the within being equal to the without as the physical world. Thus all thoughts , and the accumulation of thoughts, as emotions and feelings, are storms in the teacups of ourselves as life, that need only be brought back into common sense of physical reality. 

Support a Living Income Guarantee to get the ecology, as us, equal to the economy, and clean up the mirage of the mind accumulating into the physical causing disease and behaviors of lack as what having allowed the mind to be more than life has created, and equalize yourself to life, this is what has been sought, and the gift of this is right here in front of us, we need only accept it and realize how we have separated ourselves from the physical, from life. DIPLite. It is free. Check out the interviews on Eqafe, explaining the consequence and history of humanity in separation from life.

Day 53 Rejection and expectation are Image Nation

Day 53 

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel that I have been rejected by friends, by people that I have known throughout my life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to  feel that I have too much to do.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to  feel bitter within the very muscles of my face, the raw red devil of my self behind the mask of a human face, to believe that no one listens to me, to not realize that the present system of profit, accepted and allowed by the human, as it is what is within each of us, as fear defended as ego in fear of loss, that the very being of ourselves as this is so entrenched that each of us can no longer hear, can no longer see that all perceived hurts and losses are the “what is due” allowance of non self direction as life, of clinging to directives from without, of believing something of ourselves can be lost, of expecting something without to take care of us, when it is only ourselves as life that is the care built right in, a perfect instrument of life, rejected, thus all rejection is self rejection, where the solution is to self realize self as life and forgive the accepted and allowed resonances of blame, spite, justification, excuse,  and to clean this up within to begin the walk of cleaning up this system on earth that does not care for, hear, see, sense, what this earth is, as what this earth gives, the gift of life, as this is the value.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to want to save the world, without realizing that until all ability to stand through a constriction of dis-ease within my self is steady and constant, where I carry no blame, no shame, no excuse, no justification, no spite to and towards anything of this world as this world is me, the same.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel it is impossible to reach people, as I feel it is impossible to reach myself, all an illusion, as what this means is that I am stagnant within blame, spite, excuse, shame, humiliation, self judgement, and within this I hear only this cry as the mind that has embedded itself into my physical so long was my cry of self pity, that I can no longer hear my self as life to the point where I am separate from myself as a turning from myself the embrace of myself as what I am, dis-allowing this self embrace as life, here, constant, steady, where self embrace is.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to blame people as system for not hearing myself here, when it is me that is not hearing what is here, it is myself not hearing, as I am moving as ego, as energy wanting to win something.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that all the people who turned from me were turning towards what they believed would be of support to them within a system where money determines existence instead of the value as what is here being life, and within this life is not granted expression and development but the following of what is offered within presented lack to create fear where all are indentured to subservience to systems of limited design, drugs that do not cure, to animals in confinement and suffering, to education systems that place children in a chair for hours taking in information without any practical inclusive use of their gift as a human physical body, to sense, to see, to experience physically this world, where the very soils of this earth lose what allows the soil to breath - clean water, microorganisms, decaying plant matter, air, all working in tandem to support life, where the outflow of this is a sound on this earth in constant broadcast which must be heard and faced and realized as needing to change to end the grind of useless inactive life expression.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to  blame others for wanting to survive.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to  place blame onto myself and any other, when all there is , is to remain here in breath as myself , to walk the clean up of this earth, which means the clean up of my self of resonances of blame, spite, excuse,  accusation, insecurity, superiority, more than, less than, dreaming, imagining, all a reality separate from what is physically here as the gift as a tool of expression.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that I have ever been hurt by another, that I have ever been rejected by another, that I needed to add on a persona presentation to fit into the group separate from common sense of what is practical in this physical world.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to defend in the face of opposition instead of standing in common sense whether heard or not heard, where if spite and accusation is response than it is simply that common sense is effective and the mind resists, as it is not the label of gain sought but the constant as common sense as what is best for all that is passed on, until it is done, as what is best for all will not manifest until it is passed on, thus what is best for all is all that is to be voiced, as I as life cannot be life until what is best for all is manifest on this earth, thus does the orchestration of what is best for all begin, the voice in the darkness of that which is best for all as this is here, as this is what the human wants, as the life that is here must itself create, and thus is the voice, yet weak and small, beginning to speak as life, where this voice will only manifest through speaking and living this.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize, every time I doubt, that this doubt is the cause of what is on this earth, that this doubt is separation from life, as this doubt will generate fear as it is in opposition to life, just as when I face opposition and doubt, where I fear separation from what is before me, not looking at what is before me and in common sense using the principle of what is best for all, where the conflict is in itself in separation from agreement and action as what is best for all, and it must be known that there are no choices but what is best for all.

I forgive my self for not allowing and accepting my self to see realize and understand that should I look, I will find a hole within my heart, a hole self created and accepted and allowed as I have become stagnant within my self in abdication of life, where this hole lies the whole of life, when this hole is the path to the whole, the being of myself as one and equal to life, this embrace of giving, this heart I am lead to believe is fixed/cured with chemicals within a system of profit that needs followers to allow leaders as profiteers who themselves are not life, as they are as tied to me as I am to them as I accept and allow a system ignorant of the giving abundance of earth, the physical,  a cure that has not in fact been found as the form allowed and accepted on earth is tantamount as the present destruction of earth reveals, as disease can only be cured by self thus must laws be passed to force the opposite as though words are abused/used to guard falsity when such structures need not exist as the earth is here giving freely without signature, as signature is a creation of man in separation, having lost a sense of the whole, and thus attempting to fill in the lost hole of self with structures that have no substance and must be printed endlessly to survive.

I commit myself to breath, to breathing to pushing through resistances.

I commit myself to slowing down my breath and giving response only within a steady calm breath.

I commit myself to  realizing that all anger is based on a belief as an expectation of a persona based on accepted societal values and structures that are inadequate in allowing self direction and thus self discovery of this physical world and the expression of self as life, within this the letting go of the anger as persona management is a habitual justification accepted and allowed as what is real, yet absent in awareness of this earth and self as a directive as life.

I commit myself to remaining within breath in the face of expectations that are themselves in separation from life,

I commit myself to breathing through anxiety, as anxiety is based on expectation within habitual personnel developed in separation from life as a starting point.

I commit myself to walking as self as life, as realizing this physical world as what is real and one and equal to myself here, where there need be no anger as the physical is the embrace of life.

I commit myself to speak up about the atrocity of the abuse of earth existent as the present money system of profit where money accumulation is valued more than life, and within this, denies the equality and oneness of men - and all subject to men’s imposition - to this physical world of substance, that which in fact is the expression of life, here.

I commit myself to realize expectation is a mind dream, and thus a separation from what is physically here.

I commit myself to realize that, as a child, many expectations were driven into myself, leading to a separation from the physical world and a search to fulfil and complement imposed expectations

 instead of developing self direction, equality, expression in and as the physical world.

Life Review

Energy and money