Day 692 The richness of potential. It is always here.

In people I notice that there is something soft and fluid. A sharp edge can appear and yet, it will yield to a softer openness, and change.

I tend to look at what is sharp, and avoid this. I forget the softness that is always there, something always within reach.  Just as it is within myself, letting go of things and taking the time to look here, see perspective. It is that which allows perspective. It is only difficult if I accept and allow it to be difficult. What is hard, is not letting go,  what it hard and sharp is the shield of protection and defense, in fear. In fear, I lose the choice to look and let go and see what is ever present, always underlying everything, something that nurtures in every moment. Something that nurtures with a constancy that never ever disappears unless I allow it to within myself.

This would be the nature of creation, that absolute purpose, that absolute potential, a constant.

The potential a richness that can shape into anything, that can become anything as it is everything at the same time. It is always present and can be accepted in an instant. 

It is not like the so-called white light. That is like a shower of something that appears to hold a promise yet that is all - it appears to have promise, and yet it is a false promise.

This softness, that gentleness, that has unlimited potential and  never ever goes away, it is like an infinite nurturing. The irony is that one will only ever fall into that nurturing softness because it is that from which all life springs, a richness full of  potential, and it is always there, ready to catch one, always in all ways.  It is only a thin veil away.

To become one and equal to that potential is a journey to life, a journey out of the mind consciousness that is a false promise, a survival suit in self interest. It is a journey out of fear, out of the friction of good and evil and a parting of the veils of a mind consciousness, an imperfect practice out of sync with creation. 

Day 514 through the veil - to be directive in the way of becoming of sound mind.

I have been looking at facing other people, talking with them, interacting with them and remaining non-reactive, non protection and self defense, non-paranoid of the supernatural energetic emotions, and feelings as the mind. I have to slow down and not react, and within this see myself and attempt through the veil - to be directive in the way of becoming of sound mind, which is life, which is in practice to do what is best for all.

So, two things, I want to pull together here. Aggression and this outline of how to consult that I read in another blog. It was a format of: Pain Spotting, Perspective Taking, Story Telling, Framing, and Probing, before consultation.

I have been working with some kind of knot/not in my heart. Last night it was so intense, so I looked at my day. I had spent some time talking with people. During this time I had remained within breath. I noticed how I wanted to move towards an agreement with the person with whom I talked. I had to breath, slow down and let myself “ agree” and then become “ divergent” in moving through my own habits, through monitoring NOT remaining in an emotion or feeling as in holding that emotion and/or feeling, and looking at the belief in terms of playing with the perspective, listening or telling a story/movement to show understanding, then framing a possible or ‘in development’ framing - as walking into what continued agreement- without any sense of rushing/gain/security allowance ( or my heart starts to react- like I want the ‘good’ love, lol),  and then probing to understand the attitude - lol - latitude of insight so that I can then walk together with the person into understanding.

So, it is to agree and understand in order to agree and understand. It is to face the aggression as the attitude of separation, the pain, and to agree and understand, to then frame an agreement and understanding that moves into a solution with rewards. I have to not fear facing the existent framework, and can agree with the aggression and realize it cannot hurt me to agree because  it is a session of agreement in a moment, to see an existential framework, to understand and build a framework of, because I cannot think in terms of solution until I have enough of an understanding to work with the attitude in ways that use divergent thinking ability, or a sound mind, a fluid, mutable, playful, directive process of latitudinal ( lol) perspective causing the pain/limitation.

I have carried a statement about aggression within me that I have allowed an emotion of anger towards. I have the thought, “ I can’t stand aggression.” I have even gone so far as to label people as “ aggresives.”  Like a catch word. And I have this because I become defensive when I am faced with what I call aggression.

But, aggression, is, for me, like a session of being forced to agree. And as this, I can agree, meaning I can acknowledge and make sure I understand the thing being lived as, as an agreement about something, so I can  frame an understanding, and make this clear, but this does not mean I must remain within that agreement in action. I can understand through agreement and then move/follow through into playing with the state of understanding and asking questions about it, probe the framework/understanding and then reformat and direct, as a process with the framework as the attitude of the other, together. So, the ghost in the machine, need not become my agree session, but can be agreed upon and played with, like a ball, probed and thrown to the wind - so to speak- lol- to be directed TOGETHER into solution. So, aggression is a session of agreement to discover and agree and then to journey into more awareness. In trying to understand something, as in coming into an agreement, there can be no rush, no desire, no fear of not being able to understand. Like, okay, lets reach an agreement of mutual understanding, lets see the pain, the friction and make sure we mutually understand the factors, and go from there. So, it is to suspend any idea and build a framework because no decisions or agreements can be made until the total framework has been understood.  I mean, I can only be, here, right where I am, and I cannot move in ways that are best for all, until I take the time to investigate. And this means, having a direct connection and understanding of the problem, and I can’t make any movement until this part is done, and whatever I agree to in understanding as a process of building a framework is not my self agreeing to continue to understand So, I let any reactions go, within or without.  I mean, at this point, there is nothing defining me because I am agreeing to understand only, I am not agreeing to action. This is careful interplay, before the process of creation. So, I can wear my heart on my sleeve and open it up and feel, without a fear of loss and hope for gain, without insecurity and rush for security,  in fear of self definition of lack based on idea, because I am taking the time to come to an agreement of understanding only of what is here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear aggression.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear agreement.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear a loss, as in believing I am defined by one moment only.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe in aggression,

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become passive in the face of aggression

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not question the state of being, the belief, opinion and idea behind aggression.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to face aggression from a starting point of protection and self defense.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to limit myself to agreeing with aggression.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear standing equal and one to aggression, believing that this can define me.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that aggression is  a scream of pain and as such can be understood and agreed to in a moment, to then be formatted and questioned again to then deconstruct/reformat/play with/looked at divergently in relation to practical application to become an agreement that can be stood with and understood in clarity and common sense and as such practiced.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see , realize and understand that aggression can be a lie by omission, a preemptive strike, a one sided platform of presentation of knowledge and information, which is a crime against life, and that when reacted to and defined and touted as the blame of limitation, I stop and I breath, and I see realize and understand that it is to come together and understand and see the agreements made and agree the make the necessary changes that have accepted and allowed aggression instead of agreement.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become intimidated by aggression and to remain within this state of being only, not looking through to consequence, and as such taking the time to investigate the starting point, bringing it back to self, realizing what I fear being defined as, what I fear losing as a self definition, what I use to hide as a consequence of believing what I have, how I have been educated, what experiences I use to validate myself as a more than, who I am culturally, class wise, gender wise as values used to define me, what I fear to be defined as, in relation to a limited system of order that is in separation from realizing that the physical world is life, equal and one and as such is to be valued, where life is the value.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that aggression is a form of agreement, a presentation as an idea, opinion and belief, that cannot be agreed upon until all understand and agree in understanding what is agreed upon with self investigation that creates a common sense that enables self direction, self responsibility, self trust, thus, the way and the means to agreement on earth is to make clear what is agreed upon so that all may participate and create a society that creates through understanding what is here in form and function, to agree in session of and as a collective of men standing in respect, equal and one with the physical world as life, where life is the value.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to attempt to placate aggression, and as such agreeing with what is a coerced agreement not seeing realizing and understanding that in not investigating all consequence, realizing what has been made a statistical mean, has ignored extremes, and then rendered them as “externalities” to support a very limited design on earth, by men, that does not stop, slow down, and realize the systemic structure of money flow, as wealth flow created by generations of men/labor, must respect the form as the physical world, here as this is the real way and means of life, as the physical world is the manifested form of life, before any human structure of hierarchy, and as such the circulatory structure of earth as nature works , and is the model of life.

Day 513 The Paranormal Veil as Mind Mis-take and the Solution as Income.

The habit of wanting to go into blame instead of addressing inequality, which is facing opposition, which is projecting  a “ wrong” assuming one is right - an act of spite - is myself moving into the impatience of forcing an issue, myself no longer addressing limitations and bringing them into what imparts a solid understanding.

For instance, I had a conversation with someone about history, and I held my tongue. I did not speak what came to mind, to keep the peace - so to speak. This person was complaining about how “ history” was not being taught - just as a general statement. I did not move this into detail. I wanted to say that history is not taught, meaning, in common sense, that the history of life on earth as a system of economy of ecology is not understood, that if we looked at the expression of life on earth, in these terms, there would be no iconic name of one person attached to a movement, but that the “ clay” of the earth as the physical would be described as the form created from freely given natural resources and how these resources moved into a from that determined the state of being of life on the ground, overall, on earth. In the moment, the jump to such a way of looking at history, I allowed to seem overwhelming. It is like facing a dialogue of terms that are a starting point of completely different terms. One of icons in relation to that which the icons are a composition of. 

I find myself shaking within all of this. So, I look at this shaking. This “ shaking” becomes smaller within me, but it is still something I have not “ pulled” together, like learning to control one’s vibrato on a string. I find myself becoming loopy and barely being able to sense the space and time of here.  And I have to look at what I am not addressing, and instead allowing myself to react to as a threat. I have to slow down and breath, because structurally, I am not moving with an absolute purpose that is one and the same as what expresses creation in ways that do no harm. I mean, this is there because this is how life is, it is what life is.

In reading about Chile, and the practices of supposed economic balance, through tax, interest, subsidy, currency adjustments, I begin to see an act of adjustments moving always in unequal measure, always wanting to move capital in unequal ways, a smoke and mirrors show that is really a wall of protection and defense for the interests of those same icons of self aggrandizement that are dependent on the ecology. Allowing these icons is like a giant vacuum, a golden calf, that sucks up everything leaving a desert behind, and everyone is so busy bowing down on their hands and knees in accolade or, lol, protest , that an ignorance of the substance building the idol becomes the movement of the ecology into economy around the idol worship, war - ship.

I find myself becoming very heavy within, very “ thick” like, as the best way to explain this. It is a form of righteousness.  And then I rush and want to explain, but the dialogues around me only seek one me-lode-y. The contrast of self pity and giving up is not what balances out this “ vibration” of forces of ignorance/separation wanting an object to define for us. The only thing that can measure structure is that which expressed/built the structure. Obviously, this cannot be the movement of those praying, nor can it be the movement of those protesting; these are in separation of a balance that is an awareness of the whole, this being the very ground on which we stand, this being the very ecology building the economy. In other words, humans are not echoing the ecology, the manifestation of life that is the expression of life, that unfortunately also echos the accumulation of accepted and allowed separation from realizing itself as life. 

I keep moving into the habit of explanation via a picture, an idol, a belief, opinion of idea in my mind instead of slowing down and learning to see the structural movement on the ground, which, is probably why, when I read about the various meanderings of economic re-FORM in Chile, I had to move really really slowly, and reread again and again. It all seemed overwhelming. I could not see the forest through the trees. And can I speak of the details? No. It seems, like a hodge-podge of fixes that just move around the dis-ease within this country, never addressing the real sickness, which is a lack of structure that allows ease to exist. In all, looking at Chile, shows that the wealth created from the resources HAS to flow back into the place from which the wealth came to maintain that place/ground/environment. Allende, who was a doctor and happened to experience “ on the ground” life, realized this. Of course, those distant entities in America, as the company of ego, in ivory towers - today shiny metallic structures ( from which men are jumping to their deaths) , are so addicted to their energy flow maintaining their iconic self definitions, that they are in sensed when someone stand and says, hey, look at what is happening on the ground, what has been taken has not been given/returned in ways that support the physical substance of life, thus, the profits made must be measured and deducted from what is needed to balance out the devastation left behind.

This is the point of tantrum. just as any addict reacts, the very idea of losing that which supports the accepted and allowed self definition, as the state of being within. This is where the self accepted obsession, which uses the - ironic- ability to focus - must change and transform, slow down and come back to earth, but when first encountered, a shock of insight flashes by, as one has to admit what has been accepted yet not grasped enough to direct because the belief is in full swing. It really is a simple as “ righting’ a perceptual mis-take. That is all. it is also, bringing self back to life, to realizing what we are all looking for, before we “ got lost” in ideology, is  enjoying  ourselves as playing with - so to speak- the substance of creation, of which we are all composed of, and as such the same.

Thus, it is as easy as stopping, looking around and realizing we are the organizers of here, and that we, each of us, can organize this world in ways that all needs are met, that the plants and the animals, and the trees and the wind and the sun, and the soils can be formed in ways that do no harm, that support each of us and the things that are here that support here, and that this would be incredible fun. The veil of separation from this is so very thin, and this veil is composed of pictures in and as the mind, an energetic projection of what I in simplistic terms would call a film both of icon and  electric like substance that is exposed and feeds the manifestation of personality. Thus, all is visible, to each, and to self. And we all know this, it is there in the undercurrent of self, it is there under the ringing electrical voltage of energy that is the voice of separation within self, that which is called the mind, that which many eastern religions say must be quieted to find peace. So, what we are allowing individually is obvious. In this ease of silence, can we then stand and begin to rebuild that damage of this self inner-rest/interest as a state of being that is a mis-take in becoming equal and one to and as the substance of life of which the physical world is a composition of and as, a gift of life, that can only exist, here and that can only happen when we realize we are all equal as life. And, also, to realize the suppression of life in so many, that will take time to rebalance, to refurbish, as so much has been dis-allowed and/or sucked out/diminished. 

Practically speaking, a Living Income Guarantee is to spread the wealth to all, so the many can slow down and stabilize, stand up from kneeling, become silent from protesting, and look at the ground, the animals, the plants, the soils, the water and begin to understand how it all works, and how it is all interconnected and able to function in ways that support instead of harm. A Living Income Guarantee outs an end to inequality and enables the ability to realize self respect as life through actions of respect for the ecology that is the source of the economy.

Day 92 The I am trapped character

Day 93 The I am trapped character

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to be the I feel trapped, with no way out character.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that there is no way out and that I am trapped.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to focus on an idea that I am trapped, that I can no longer see the solution that is right here in front of me, which is, and can be, only one step, and thus this feeling that I am trapped is my self, as well, wanting expectations to all be automatically filled and completed.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that within a system of survival and competition, debt is used to keep an individual trapped into fearing change, as change might mean a loss of money and income with which to sustain oneself.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that without change there is no self development.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that this character of belief that I am trapped, is accepting and allowing conditions and limitations in fearing loss of what is believed to be good and bad in and as how I live and where I live.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that my mind runs through possible scenarios of change, and eliminated changes that do not fit the picture of what is easy, what is known, what is acceptable according to a family belief system.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize that, like in the movie “ the Cube” there are many characters that are trapped within this cube and yet only one gets out, the supposed “idiot.”

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the trap is my belief , opinion and idea in and as my mind based on the morality of my past.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see realize and understand that I am only trapped if I accept and allow perpetual ideas as control of outcome, where I am so busy eliminating what is not known and thus comfortable that I resist seeing anything that is outside of my own conditioning.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize that my trap is self created.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that patterns of my conditioning is what I am holding onto and thus creating a trap in and as the movement of myself here.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that my trap is essentially a fear of change.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have a thought that a way out of this trap is impossible.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that this trap I believe I am within is myself not wanting to let go of the past.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that this trap I believe I am within is my self fearing making changes for which I will be judged as less than.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that in taking the steps necessary to change, to walk out of this accepted and allowed and believed “trap” I will lose friends and will eventually be told. “I told you so.”

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear the future, the unknown, which is not unknown, it is the illusion that things will be different outside of the trap of my own beliefs.

I forgive myself for allowing the voice of the character that says, “ I can't go on” to be the directive of myself, instead of realizing that the only choice is the voice of principle, as what is best for all is best for self.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting the voice of spite, denigrating an object or another outside of myself as the cause of my trap, which can only be what traps if I accept and allow it.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have the desire to blame, to justify my own trap, and my own belief – in separation from what is real as this physical world – where I allow an opinion to be the ammunition to remain within my trap, to defend not having to change and let go of comfortable behaviors.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to petrify into and as accusation as an excuse to not look beyond my own limitations, my own trap, my own accepted and allowed care actor  of personal beliefs, opinions and ideas, an illusion to step beyond to become equal to what is real, this physical world.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the confines of my trap are what I know, and thus leaving my trap may cause the end of my own survival and lead to a failure, where it is the trap, as accepted beliefs, ideas and opinions that have lead to myself  being caught within a trap, and thus in believing myself to be in a trap, and yet not wanting to let go of what brought me into this trap, is what I fear losing, and in all common sense I am actually clinging to the bars of my own created cage, fearing to lose that which is the trap.

I commit myself to no longer see the walls of my own trap.

I commit myself to realizing that my trap is my self carrying the burden of my past as memorabilia to attempt to carry with me.

I commit myself to realizing that my trap is my social conditioning, my cultural conditioning, and my personality conditioning based on accepted and allowed beliefs of what I am from childhood in relation to values that are not the value of life.

I commit myself to realizing that this physical world as life is the value, and not a picture and idea of how things should be according to family, class, society, personal beliefs, opinions and ideas.

I commit myself to realize that the fears within and as myself have no value as life, and within this that the fears of others have no value as life as they are the walls of the trap which I believe will send me falling, yet when I look at where I will fall to, there is nothing there, just an idea of fuzzy logic and no clarity.

I commit myself to realizing that the voice in and as my mind, the voice that says, 'you can't do that' is the very wall creating the trap.

i commit myself to realizing that the veil of friction and con-flict are the illusion of loss and not what is physically real here.

I commit myself to communicating within friction and conflict as the fear that is the veil of illusion, a shower of seeming vertigo, where as I breath I realize that my feet have never left the ground as I am here, as I am life, as I am oneness in equality one and equal as the physical , here.