Learning step by step to redress a limited morality Day 733

This week I had conversation with people in very different positions in this world. I have learned to become quiet and listen with greater ease. Meaning instead of reacting I listen, to hear the forms, to see the ‘ numbers’ placed before me, as the measure of the information.  

I have two memories coming up recently. One recent and one from my childhood.  

The first is while I am working in a  school. There is a boy in the room, it is a remediation , or invention class. This boy is behind in his ability to read and process information. The teacher comes and asks the boy why he signed up for a class that he knows he can only take once- as the boy has already had this class. The boy then moves this into a conversation as to why he can only take the class once. The teacher responding. After the boy leaves, this teacher gets on the phone and goes through the whole conversation again with a colleague.  I watch all of this, somehow it is a time frame of busyness that is a comfort zone, a distraction. The boy, so isolated from his peer group, grasps as moments of verbal interaction, to have something to live. He knows he cannot repeat that special class that is popular. The teacher joining in the topic to engage the child, and using the topic to fill the space and entertain, because real problem solving as processing information is not happening and it is the problem.  Ironic that the mechanics used are the thing needing greater definition, greater self reflection within what one lives in real space as what one expresses, as a math that has no real direct seeing movement. It is like an elongated song, a math, imposed on being grounded in this reality.  It is like a bubble of drama, or draw-me, imposed on the space that is a self seeking connection yet the connection is a false positive, as engagement is a fundamental drive. Yet this drama, done with words and values, is sidestepping a real awesomeness of being present in all that is here, as the physical.  It is, by default, a comfort zone melody/math/soap opera filled with good intentions, yet missing the mark, not seeing itself as a separation from the capacity of itself to see the distraction it is by the very nature of a lack of presence in real space. 

This also happened with talking to a friend. This person has had one of the best educations our country provides. She has attended the best schools.  We were talking about history, when she made a statement that I have heard and could see the accepted logic of in relation to ideas about changes in time away from what is considered being spiritual. It was a statement that science caused a loss of spirituality. When this statement was made, I countered it by saying that this could be said of any change as recorded and voiced by our system. This naturally caused a lot of friction and I had to stop, listen and allow the rant of defensive for platitudes to play itself out.  I checked myself even when it was said that I had to be righteous at the end of the response my words elicited. I even agreed that I had been righteous, and that what was said was a standard  formula that was stated. Naturally this brought on more reaction. Yet, as she spoke, to some extent, she travelled through time and realize the pattern, that it could be said that there were other periods where the same argument was made that a subsequent period created a loss of something. Overall, this was a play out of knowledge and information memorized, a standard hi/high- story ( a supposed morality) of information constantly circumnavigating practical and grounded application in real space and time, in common sense of what and who we are as physical beings here.  

Even to see this, and not be as reactive towards these songs, these maths, these measure of information, took some time. Standing up to the very morality of this, meaning to speak up counter to it, even if that meant calling out patterns, knowing this would elicit reactions, I allowed to cause a lot of fear. This fear manifested as myself feeling like I was losing something. Physically I would become, just like the feeling of fear, loopy and ungrounded, like I was in a soup, losing ground.  I feared that I was going to be cast out, rejected, because I did not know, as agree with the formula, the accepted formula. Meanwhile, when this did happen, I was always here, it was only an idea within me, the loopyness myself, in a way, liquifying everything I believed as spoke as allowed, moving into a spin, a deconstruction of the information as me. I would acquiesce to not lose the relationship, for various reasons that were more of idea than anything real. What is interesting is that when I was more simple and more practical, and relaxed, as in caring but not that much, the drama stopped.  In this situation, I could see the remnants of my own fear playing out, and within the rant of justification for a standard belief, a process of self discovery as the math, as the equation of events made belief were made verbal. As the realization of a pattern via justifying the standard pattern was seen, there was an immediate movement into value judgements , this some call hyperbole.  It is that formulaic design I have seen in those blogs written by trolls, where a truth is stated and then moves into the fear tactics of value judgement, a kind of mendacious gossip that is the pulling forward of a value judgement and then suggesting worst case sceanrios. It all can appear to move like a horror show as it triggers any fears within one, and keeps one riding in an illusion that is held in place by a lack of processing what is allowed as informed that has no real relationship to practical reality. For me, moving through a morality of and as an idea that pushing against this in any way, was taboo, was mean, meant a certain rejection by the establishment. Somehow, the opposite is true, which I have found when being patient, allowing the scream of limited information to play itself out, to move into discovery or the formulaic play-out of trolling, as name calling being a distraction from that moment of realizing a pattern that would mean re-evaluating everything one had defined one's self as. 

This sense of feeling like a liquid inside myself, triggering the second memory, I am in elementary school, and suddenly the wods around me are changing, and they change from some value form, I don't remember, to the point I remember, as being this liquid thing that falls apart and reforms. In the memory, I do not react with the sense of losing ground that I have experienced as an adult. I suppose because as a child, I was still grounded in the physical to a greater degree than I have allowed myself to be as an adult. 

Interesting that I am writing this, because I have asked myself in this process where that point of separation from being focused in common sense, happens. This because I have asked question about being in a situation where I, be it imagination or a micro second in seeing through a veil, managed to see a different world perspective than what I was lost in as that information I spun in that changed in a moment for which it appeared to me that I had no control over. I wanted to see the sequences of change from one to the other. The leaps of  change happening too fast for me to process.  I suppose some tiny part of me understood that I am in a smoke and mirrors show, the ghost of which terrified me, and lead to asking the question " Where is life? It must be here, it has to be here, where is it?" 

As I learn to assess in living space what is happening around me, and I begin to realize a false morality in practice, I move into shame, and a sense of impossibility at clearing all of this up. there is a point of wanting to cry that circles around as I move through the sequences of my own experience, of my own experiences from my life. I would say the hardest from within my relationship to all of this at this point, is no longer fearing to move through an acepted and limited morality.  That being to face and address the standard line of information. This being a justification, that a method of operation, that is formulaic. Ironically, this a means that lead to a greater seeing or realizing of these patterns was through slowing down and processing the information, not fearing to lose something, as having a faith that somehow life is here, all around me, as it has to be, because life will. I would pick myself up, like a slow moving Sherman tank and try again, despite so many around me coming in with counter rationals, myself having a character that wants to cry out in hopelessness, that being a memoory from childhood, a memory of giving up in some way, as yet not clearly defined. Somehow, that is okay that it is not, because the means to this point is to keep going until the mote in every eye is clear, and what is eternal is realized. Somehow, mixed in with the fear, is a tiny sense of joy. And with that joy, is so muchshame, a realization of so much lost, I just want to cry out that I am sorry, so very sorry for not having lived the potential inherent in what men on earth can be. 

This was a loss of what I left behind, as a gentleness that had a natural patience, which I lost in my life as well in a person, something that can never come back. No one can tell me that it is not my fault, when yes it is the default of not being focused and in respect of what is all around us, and that is life, manifest as the physical.  What I project as a loss in another, is what I lost as me. The means to be this, the same patience and silence that allows a morality to play itself out, and the action of not reacting to the formula of a troll, that truth coupled with inflamatory value judgements using a false narrative with a energized voice that has only the power I give to it. My own process of choosing fear and believing the self created and accepted entity of ideas wihtin me, to seem more real than the practical.  In all I can embrace the unnatural, because it is a game of shadows and stand within what remains no matter what, that I am here, I am the same after the emotional picture show peaks and moves either into realization and/or protection and defense. That defense needing no push back and only patience, because that reaction allows me to realize my own reflection as idea, of what I have allowed. It is a gift. 

In this, overall, I can stop chasing shadows as what resistance is by name, as information, a story imposed through words -as knowledge and information - and remember who and what I am, that nothing can define me, and that I can learn the smallest of movements, to stand equal to that gentleness that is the will of me as life, here.  I can be myself,  I can gift myself life, I can recognize the paranoia of the paranormal, as the promise I made to myself that I had to become myself, to ensure that the loss of what is precious, never happens again.  Somehow, this state of being on some border, as I see it, is both a mixture of shame and joy.  There is only one choice here.

This reminds me of the slow death of my father. His body having all the characteristic tics and tensions, that slowly faded. His body became still. The energies appearing to no longer have license over the body. The body taking a couple of breaths even when he was gone. His request that he be buried next to his sisters, a telling story - as that time with his sisters, was probably the last time he remembers being really happy/grounded, just as my memory as a child.  This choice being the choice where he remembers some semblance of himself, so far back in the past. The presence of him, being more of a child, gentle and simple. How could that be?  For me, the loss of that gentleness is unacceptable.  The wall of the mind,as a false positive, a charade of separation from what is real, must be called out by name, and allowed to see itself for what it is, a personality unequal to the real potential of self to be what is natural as the inherent will of life within and as who and what we are here on this physical planet, where all plans as forms of information are visiable, even those causing separation if we simply slow down and do what we can all do so well, which is to do the math, to see the forms,  to know we can stand stable in ourselves and choose a practice of respecting the physical world around us to realize what does no harm. 

Remember to breath. 

Day 479 Watching Autism in My World. What is Mind Consciousness?

I sat with an autistic boy this week and worked with him. I had to sit very close to him, and because I have had some experience with Autism, that being physically close to the child can be disturbing to the autistic child, I stopped for a moment and said to the autistic child, that I would probably touch them to 1. remind them to sit up straight and 2. because I was in such close proximity to them. They immediately said that I could not touch them. So, I said, okay, how about this, on a scale from one to ten, and I asked for their hand, which they did not give, so I went on, and showed them with my own hands gaging what I wanted to show, is it okay if I touch you with a “ two intensity.” Immediately, before I even finished what I was saying, their hand was right there  on mine, a very directive action, and they showed me the intensity with which I could “ touch” them, because I was sitting very close and working with them. That touch was so directed, so steady, so clear. As I worked with this person, I noticed that if my shoulder brushed theirs, for example, they would immediately reach up and touch themselves where this happened. And I realized I was being overly careful and hesitant. I did not have that very direct “ touch” as physical connection in a moment when working with someone in close proximity that that person showed me. It is hard to explain how “ here” that touch was, but it was not hesitant in any way. And yet within this, what I realized within this one movement, so directed, that this autistic person had the ability to connect in common sense with this physical world, despite the constant voice of positive reinforcement statements coming out in a timed and conssitent manner, which is probably what this boy had heard all his life, to ostensively “ keep them going,” like giving a “ positive” as a directive instead of a direction that was bringing connection to common sense here within building something within this anxious person that was directive, equal to awareness and understanding of physical reality.

I say this, because within working with this boy, I remember watching my twin sister’s autistic son, my nephew, grow from infancy into a preteen.

I remember having the impression, that the behavior of my nephew was a display of all the anxiety of my sister, and my parents in many ways. It was like seeing the physical twitches and emotional duress of my parents and sister compounded. I also remember not saying anything because to look this way is considered “ unpositive” “ impolite” like drawing attention to what is “ bad” is not allowed. I mean we all do this, we romanticize the movements of ourselves and make them huge, to push away the “ bad” the constriction, the frustrated expression, instead of looking at the movement of what is happening in detail, which is right there in front of us. I mean, I was seeing the unconscious fears as judgements being exhibited by my nephew and somehow realizing what was happening and I was my own limitation based on beliefs of what is socially acceptable to be expressed. And I remember feeling trapped, within this, like I could not say what I wanted to say, because I had not learned to stand stable within what I was seeing, I had allowed the separation, as mind to be the only conduit of communication, and I could not find a way to fit what I sensed. In effect, I was the same as that autistic child, only but a different configuration ( and I am not saying that I understood all the details at the time, as having the structure immediately at hand to explain myself into an explanation with my sister). I remember standing there staring at this compounded neurosis of my family, and thinking this was of consequence and not a “ disease” so to speak as an idea. In any event, working with this boy brought all of this back.

And even here, the years I watched this in my nephew, were the years directly after the death of my husband, a time where I was what I considered numb for about five years, which research shows that “ tragedy” can have an impact for five years or so. So, here I was, numb, and sometimes even saying to myself and asking others, “ I have a problem, I am indifferent to so much of what is going on.” And I think that it was in this state that such things as looking at my nephew from a “ daze” of indifference, of having nothing defining me because I had lost what was defining me, that I had moments of just accepting what was here, as the total of what has been accepted and allowed by men as mind, as limited values made bigger than life, and as such turned into a reality that is metaphysical, superstitious, imposed on what is real, which is physical reality. And, even here, there was a move to “ care” and resolve this.  I could not accept what was here, and within this I could not exactly explain what was here, and I had to find out, what was going on, and so I found desteni. It is like they are explaining what I sensed, in my state of indifference. And even here, it took me some time, and is a continual process, of not allowing this experience to become an idea, a directive, a self definition. What needs be done in the end, is correct the separation, bring it back to equality as equal movement with physical reality, as in including physical reality as being as much life as the human, all of it. It is to be a direct movement with the physical, here.

Within this, to realize that an autistic child, underneath all the chaos of compounded generational separation into idea before life - which is movement equal and one in consideration with physical existence, is life. The life as the natural expression of the child  is there, the mind as the conscious, subconscious and unconscious mind, is not equal to physical reality, and yet because that child exists, and as such is the substance of life, that child can be walked back into alignment with common sense. it is there, underneath the spinning information, manifest as nervous ticks and programmed words of what is essentially hope on the part of the parents as statements of “ positive reinforcement” as “ I am an ace” or similar,  which in total, is the informing as an idea of good, without any practical application as giving structure to the child to enable them to direct in common sense, here. This action is in the realm of doing the same thing again and again and expecting a different outcome. A snake eating its own tale/tail.

And, because all those impulsed ideas of good are reverberating with as the mind of the child, as the program as sound as the parents hoping, to change this is going to take patience, and yet this can be done.

When learning something new, and I have done this many times in teaching children to play the violin, and as myself, one has to slow down and practice focusing here, looking past the voices in the head, and see directly here, each movement in detail. To start this, there is a lot of resistance naturally, because one is going against a constructed belief system as mind in a busy world where parents do not have the time to slow down, because they were born into the same situation that had a starting point of not being equal in understanding of physical reality in detail. So, slowing down will be met with resistance. Yet, this simply need be walked, and slowly built, and once moving, will begin to exponentially move forward. Remember learning something, even a new language, the beginning is really slow, almost painful, and then as the words accumulate one starts to move faster, and then after a while if one keeps going, it is easier to remember more words, and eventually the language is learned, and it begins to be fun to speak. Thus, changing oneself, one step at a time is possible, and because this change is possible, this means we as humans are very mutable, and with structure we can change, we need only walk past the resistance as what is the construct we have accepted as mind.

Our autistic children are really a gift in many ways, because they are showing us the degree of separation from ourselves as being life, as being the very substance and source of creation as life, that is able to form in equality to and with physical existence, to include all life here. That, changing our state as a constitution as mind, simply means walking/moving in equalizing ourselves in common sense to reality, realizing that slowing down will be met with resistance but with persistence redirection, in this case to become equal in understanding, can be done. What may seem like a mountain, is not a mountain, what may seem painful is simply resistance - and this is but a thin veil as standing before a movement and bringing it back into a self directed stability with the physical world, which means accepting and including all life.

So, humans have structure through sound, through words. If our children have a broad vocabulary, that has absolute values, without emotional/feeling values as a fear of loss as a threat as an idea as a gloom and doom “ what if” or a positive idea as a “ good” being used to substantiate a child, then the child becomes this idea instead of being equal in detailed movement with what is physically real, as we cannot live without physical needs and we cannot direct ourselves unless we are equal to understanding the actual physical world, because we are physical beings. Thus, a child not having words that are many and of clear meaning, the ability of the child to direct is limited and stagnant. And with ideas of good and bad, the child falls into this instead of equal connection to what is real in total, meaning what includes all that is here, all that exists.

Within this, as parents are so busy with an ideological world, a hierarchy, and trying to survive within this, and overwhelmed with a dialogue as ideas, as good and bad, taking the time to realize this consequence of separation is very difficult, as this slowing down is met with resistance emotionally. So, the parent can use technology, that which we have externalized as our innate abilities, to aid in building structure within the child, to still the limitations of good and bad, into and as equal understanding and thus self directive capacity to moving with and equal to what is us as the venue of physical existence which is what allows us expression as life. I am sure that many parents of autistic children, realize the life that is the unique expression of their child, and somehow, the disconnect of that being expressed is frustrating, but it can be done and it is only a process of taking the steps to structure the child into having the words with absolute values to stabilize within a common sense as a direct seeing of physical reality. And, that this is not as difficult as one may believe. If a process exists, it can be walked.

Just as learning to play the violin is taking the measure of becoming equal physically to it and how it functions, without judgement of good and bad, so too can a child, an adult, become equal and one in thought, word and deed, as the words we know without added values, but absolute values, can we, and our children equalize in common sense of what is around us, as the physical, as this is what is right in front of us, as life, and as this, this is what is real. Then can we, as that autistic child become a direction of absolute purpose with every breath, instead of tiny moments of some measure of clear communication buried in a sea of behaviors that are instead a measure as idea of good or bad.

Day 412 Missing the structure of here.

Last night i heard that this boy in town had been hit by a car. Then I heard about how wonderful this boy was, how special, how smart. Then the complaining about the speed limits on the highway and how people do not pay attention when driving, listening to cell phones, texting.

I had been on this same spot on the highway and almost hit a car going 45 miles an hour. The car had been this chartreuse color, the same as the new spring leaves at that time, I did not see it on the horizon, and then I was watching the oncoming traffic because there was a train of cars, behind a huge prefab house on the back of a truck, the house unit on the truck extending outwards more than the width of the lane, so the truck was driving slowly as it just barely fit on the lane with the pre-constructed house section. My eyes had missed the small car waiting to make a left  that meshed with the color of the trees, as I watched this oncoming very large truck. It must have been about ten feet before the car that I noticed, and so I turned my steering wheel and headed for the trees, luckily I managed to pull myself out of the swerving motion, me heart pounding violently. I in essence had not really looked carefully, there was no one to blame but myself. I had made a habitual cursory look at my world. I can’t blame the car, or the car companies for making a car the same color as the new foliage. I can’t blame the partial house moving down the highway, I can’t blame anything but myself, I am a body, a human, who has arms and legs and eyes and ears, I steer here as a movable physical object able to sense the world, that is if I have been developed to use this structure of myself.

So, in hearing about this boy, I realized, that yes this is tragic, that this child attempted to cross a busy secondary highway without a cross walk and ended up getting hit and is now supposedly brain dead. We cannot really blame the highway, or the speed limit, or the summer roadrage from increased traffic. We cannot look to one aspect and blame that, we have to look at the totality of this world and understand the total picture and why what is here is here, understand the forms and the functions of the structure of what is here, what we have done with this, on all levels and realize how it is out of balance. This is just common sense. 

So, one complaint was that we needed signs on the road. I was getting angry at this point, I was not being clear, the rant of blame about the lack of signs, the speed limit, the summer tourists and their behavior, the cell phones usage. There was blame placed on limited things, and all the while the boy was talked about as being so special, such a special hardworking child.

It is interesting  living in a small town, the ones that can read, the children that learn to read to some extent, if I look now, they tend to die accidental deaths, and or of cancer, the townies that never do too well at school, the fisherman, the tradesmen, they die in different ways; suicide, inebriation of drugs and alcohol over a period of time. I know one townie boy, he would notice all the animals, like he was aware of the movement of the animals, another man here could use a rod to find water, which must be possible because we know barometric pressure exists, so this must be a sense that can be developed, I mean animals must use this.

This boy, this supposedly book smart boy, obviously misjudged while crossing a street and was hit by a car. He had misread the physical movement around him. Does not matter how many words he had running around in his head, they served no sensibility at that moment. This is not to deny the development of word usage. Our words are too busy being used to describe limited values, as what we label as special, which when asked specifically how someone was special, the answer is often limited because it is not about looking at the structure here, it is about the energy, a unity through an energetic feeling to have a quick fix of pity and sorrow this being what we have allowed to validate us, when this is what separates us from living, from being able to sense the forms and structures around us.

If we are so busy being judgements of what is good and what is bad, even to the point where we gain a energetic sense of being good vicariously through being a judgement of good and this is self interested proof validating self “ goodness” what are we doing? Is this the same as that boy was being the moment he miss-crossed that road, is this what was taught to be within himself, that he no longer had the sense of the physical world, the structure of the physical world here, all the dimensions of it, all the movements of it, because he was being caught in consciousness of limited values, a process where a state of being exists in a warped reality diminishing the substance of the physical into energy, out of balance as a value of good and bad? His whole sense of himself lacking a sense of here, and being a distorted value in - stead. His “ stead” thus reading  ideological values instead of physical, real tangible structures here, the real value, the means to be, real, here, that which is what is of value?

One of the things being said, over and over again, was that more signs were needed on the road. Perhaps the signs on the road are the problem, the signs on the road are showing the separation as the need for directions from without, instead of the development of awareness of the physical world within? Division and separation from physical awareness through limited values made huge through becoming a judgement of what is good and what is bad. We made the wrong choice, we choose the tree of good and evil, instead of becoming equal and one, in sense of the tree of life, the physical, we choose ideas and thus separated into a more than and less than world, and we use signs to keep us here because we as mind are in separation from here.

Thus, the solution is to not blame that there are not enough signs on the road, that the people in the cars are not paying attention because we are, none of us paying attention, an act of blame is a sign that we are not paying attention! We cannot look at and tout that this boy was special, because all boys ( and girls and animals and plants) are special because they are a physical form functioning as life. The sensibility development of this boy is the fault of all of us, and storms in teacups about parts of what is here, are the being in separation, screaming what is wrong and what is special is not looking at here.

If we teach our children to move as emotions and feelings accumulated through directives that are of judgement of what is good and what is bad only, then this is what becomes the focus of the child, and thus the separation of the child from reading the physical structure of here, using the physical body to even be able to sense barometric changes of which the physical is capable of doing, thus the gift of life is taken from us as we allow a system of more than and less than held up by money distribution,  as the manifestation without of our own capacity, like we are throwing away the gift of life. Our self abdication of life is really us throwing away life. The solution is to come back down to earth, and to equalize ourselves to life here, to forgive the acts of emotion and feeling built from thoughts of what is good and what is bad, to accept responsibility as life, through equalizing ourselves to physical reality. Instead of running around looking at energetic emotional/feeling values it is to move in understanding the structure of here as the physical world.

TIme to get out of our mind consciousness separation from equality with physical, real supportive reality, to use the gift of life to read here. The values of more than and less than must be brought back to the physical, the gift to become life here. Walk your projections of self definition as limited values back to self as life - DIP LIte - it is free.

Listen to the interviews about the separation of the human into a mind matrix of imagination of limited ideas causing abuse on earth in ignorance of physical reality, respect for life at Eqafe.

Support a economic structure that supports all life and respects the physical world, a Living Income Guarantee. It is the physical that supports life, and thus belongs to all of us as us, as it is many hands that have created here, as this is how it is done. The words of a delusional president that one hand feeds are are simply the indication of our separation from life as the image of such a statement bears no witness to life in common sense. A real leader gives self responsibility, they do not beLIEve inequality, values of more than and less than into idols of compounded self interest gone delusional.

Day 189 A chance meeting and communication

Day 189
I realize as I was talking to myself one day- yes another issue- that in trying to say something I was in effect trying to say something with emotions. And I realize there is no clarity within this. And then, I realize that this is how we are taught to communicate. So, can I say something without terms and phrases, as learned reactions, without being emotional, do I really know what it is that I am trying to say?
I ran into an old friend, they stood there fiddling with their fingers, avoiding eye contact. Myself I could not speak, there was plenty spinning around in my mind, but none of it really was what I wanted to say. It was all this emotional/feeling stuff that was incomplete communication - so to speak.
I noticed I held my arms together over my chest. I was protecting myself. From what? Emotion? Feeling? Loss? Fear of judgement? What is this stew?
This is all a stew of emotion and feelings based on limited values, as no resolution or direction was taken, realized, made.
It is like wanting to stop what is understood to be ridiculous, and actually not having the means to communicate, or so it seems. But way down at the end of this tunnel of this emotional vortex there is self just wanting to live, to be, to communicate. and self has not had very much practice in communicating directly without separation into fear as emotion, feeling and thoughts of judgements.
Because I could find nothing to say, that was not of emotion and feeling, as reaction, and arms were held in protection, and fingers were fiddling, I said my goodbyes and turned and left. Not a solution.
This is where the absolute as “what is best for all” comes in, as this can have no lying, no deceit, no greed, no more than and no less than.
I want to say I am sorry, that I regret all the fears, all the emotions, all the feelings, as none of this was myself communicating, it was myself not being here in common sense. But, even to wallow in this is being an emotion and a feeling, a memory of the past, and an idea of loss and impossibility, as it is all the same, an expression of emotions and feelings and thoughts of should have, could have, would have. None of it is respecting and being one and equal to what is real, here, as the very substance of life as what we are.
All that I want to communicate, from my arsenal- as phrases and means and ways- is what I have been taught, my language that are more than just one word, my communications are divisions into and as emotions and feelings as judgements, that I believe are not my fault, they are the fault of the object before me , when in essence the object before me is not hearing and thus being my communication, as all that I know, of emotions, feelings and thoughts of more than and less than, as what I believe will match that ad on tv, that image and likeness of value, constructs presented.
So, if i realize this and I stand before someone wanting to communicate, and there is nothing in my arsenal of phrases and words, as all I have learned is a dictated phrased value, an energy absorbed, then I will stand there not finding anyway to really express myself as life, without an effort and practice.
And within this, if this is what is the practice of another, the bubble of being a form of this emotional communication, there will end up being no communication.
The capitalistic system is geared towards using the emotions and feelings to control and dictate, and then threatening death - as in having no money- if one should not comply. This means that the continuation of a lack of communication through what are essentially repeated emotional phrases - as values- will continue and the communication of self, in ease, as life will become more and more difficult.
I have a twin sister with an autistic son.
He would yell a lot, make loud screaming noises and throw a lot of tantrums. Now he is beginning to have a more socially acceptable behavior. But he tends to walk up to anyone and ask questions, and some people become annoyed.
What he would do when he was younger was play with telephones, learning all the numbers in sequence. And when he walked into a store he would run and find all the electrical outlets. He also like to flush the toilet all the time when he was at my home.
Here is the little human, who at a very young age, knew numbers, and all the different manufacturers of cars by make and model.
What he has to learn was the phrases to be spoken to interact with people. These he would practice and now he recites them. He can appear to be normal, as is the “norm” within our world.
This is communicating through learned sequences, as whole phrases without any direction from the substance of what is the parts of the phrase. And here this child was going around instantly creating a stability for himself by organizing all the objects in a room ( he could remember what were the objects in the room). When his worldchanged he had to immediately find a point of stability through this. Is this because he had to make a jump - so to speak- to an understanding without being given any direction within the very substance of what the real source of life, as the substance of life, was?
That is really messed up.
Think of animals training, it is the same thing, forcing into being a picture without any ability to communicate as the very substance as what we are as life.
Imagine how much vertigo, and dizziness this would cause, a huge space of miss-understanding of what we actually are as life, and then an absenteeism from self as life within communication.
We/I really need to slow waaaaayyyyyyy down and stand within self as life, here, to breath and bring ourselves into and as ourselves as life. This is why it is necessary to study how the systems work, to look at how the financial system works, to look at what we are within as emotions and feelings and thoughts, to take these phrases apart, the constructions of language, of idea, of opinion, of belief, and realize that we are all life this, autistic boy, trying to communicate but having these required forms thrown at us as how we should be without any understanding of what is here as life. What would happen within this is that one will get to a point where it appears - as one only sees what is learned- an ability to communicate what is wanted to be expressed is not existent within, as there was no real development within self as life, and only already constructed labels forced onto as what we are. And as this boy is showing us, we organize by label without any understanding of what is physically actually real, here.
In this no one here on earth has really “gotten” anything! has really understood anything. Which is why I exist -as I have accepted and allowed this and it is all I know as what i was taught- within worth and unworth, because I am not directing myself within the very substance as life here, I am trying to use already structured systems to express myself instead of being here, with and as the substance of life, that will only exist within what is best for all, as this is how life exists, here. The detail of how that substance as life exists as life is ignored, and thus a total understanding of life is not allowed to express itself, and yet it must be here in everything, right in front of us.
Thus common sense of what is here must be realized by all. Equal and one to become equal and one, to allow earth to become an expression of life. This is why the present system as capitalism must stop, it is the outflow of the separation from ourselves as life. To begin to realize life here, this system must change. There are too many caught up within it that cannot possible survive. Therefor, it is up to those who have the ability to stand and organize a body, a communication of equality, as in the actual formation of a system of equality as Equal Money, to stand and implement this. As this is how the un-equalizing forms that exist were built. Equal Money is the system to walk us into standing within and as the substance of ourselves as life.
One need only look at the news to see rampant behaviors of frustrated emotional and feelings behaviors. All ignorant of life. Most of the crime is emotional frustration and much of the new age “feel good” behavior is hiding from the “bad/frustrated/survival” behaviors. If this need to find “happy” feelings and states of being exist, than this admits the “bad” exists. This is simply hiding from what is actually here, selectively taking what supports ignorance, and or only following a sequence to a point that gets for one what one wants in self interest.
Just ask someone to continue a line of thoughts within choice, and inevitably irritation will be the response, as the following of consequence leads to that person no longer being able to hide their self interest. Here the responses can also start such as “ I don’t know the answer to that”, or “this is non of my concern ( the switch from the collective to the personal- avoidance tactic BIG TIME) “, all these responses really reveal is an inability to look at what is here, because then one would have no choice but to stand up. The problem here is that there is no other choice, as the abuse ignorance causes of not looking at all effects absolutely. Thus denying research and stating that there is no proof is abusive, and an act of self interest that has no regard for life. NONE. and this is evil.
Within this we, the human, are responsible for all the autistic children in this world, as they are the product of our accepted and allowed avoidance tactic of looking at the total consequences of our actions.
We are sowing what we reaped, and we have no one to blame but ourselves every time we say, “there is no proof” when the proof is all around us and will remain and become more and more of a problem until we realize we are responsible as the one choice, the choice of what is best for all.
Best practices will come with realizing equality as life. Equal Money, Support life.
Time to realize what your emotions, thoughts and feeling are as what separates self from life.
Walk the desteni lite process. It is FREE.
Find the link at http://desteni.org