Day 689 Looking at the word " Star"

Within defining the word star, looking at the math of the emotions and feelings that are an aggrandizement of a value, I realize, based on my own childhood, how much I can inflate something, creating an entity that I fear seeing beyond or hide behind, creating an inflated value of a good and a bad.  I am not seeing the practical math of form in physical existence. I am renting a value, that becomes a weakness that I practice  in protection and defense, an entity that must be grounded in practical reality.  After all does not a seed begin with a single movement? And do we not learn something through starting with a single movement?

What do I mean by all this?

As a child, I remember not wanting to look at my parents. As that child I have memories of always looking up, looking up towards a big person, a person I did not want to see. I would look with fear, I would resist looking.

Later, as I grew and was a little bigger, I remember turning to look and see, I remember the word “ I care” within myself. And so I became a person who cares, as though this enabled me to look. yet I looked with a energetic polarity, meaning, I looked to take care of the person. As though I could see the division from something and the behaviors in front of that blocking the person. I could see the behaviors as projections, a maze to work through. Unfortunately, I got lost in the game, and began a persona of using information to make me more, when the limitations were screamed at me, like a protection and defense I had not the means to move through yet, I could not do the math to move through this. I could not communicate the words, the measures, the math.  I created my own limitations in protection and defense.

 I remember reading the “ TIN DRUM” when I was twelve, not having any understanding of the context of war. What fascinated me was a child screaming without end. I remember carrying this book around with me, totally engrossed in reading the descriptions of the child screaming. I carried it in cars with me, where parent’s friends were amazed that I, a twelve year old was reading this book.

Obviously, I was searching for something. Perhaps I hoped at the time that somehow the scream would reach through something, would cut through what I had not defined, and remained from my past, as a memory of some entity larger than myself, in front of me, that I could not name.

Sound and words and math. It is all the same, words are measure, they are sound, they are an ordered breath. A scream is a unstructured sound, one of pure frustration and fear. It is not being able to accept what is here, and yet not having the structural means to find a way out of the smoke and mirrors show that is a kind of  hued man in separation from being grounded in the real measure of physical reality.

Now, comes the definition of the word ‘ star’ and I realize that just as I reacted to my parents as something scary, as something larger than myself, so are the ‘ stars’ of the media presented through a ubiquitous presence on a screen, in lights, and larger than life, on movie screens, always bigger than a real human. One focused on a picture in a box, where the lack of peripheral view created a space where that person became larger than physical reality, a context out of whack with real living.

Visual imagery composed of lights, like a ghost. This ghost on reality through the mechanism of lights in boxes and screens, that narrowed the focus and imprinted values, creating neurological pathways that held stories  ( storied/structured/layered intel) completely out of measure with practical reality.

If I return myself to the ground, and I were in a crowd of say 10,000 people, and someone stood on a soap box without the artistry of lights and micro phones to make-larger-than-life a person, how many people could actually be reached?  How could one really be a ‘ star’ in the modern sense?  If one looked around one, the real fabric would be others, the same as myself. Hence the whole idea of a person being a star, a larger than life entity, is an illusion of artifice.

Even in the story telling of pre-tech times, the values of developed people were made larger than life through story, repeated again and again. Entertainment that divided one from being practical and from remembering how things are built through practice and development, through walking the measure yet using the same means! I mean,  telling a story is walking a measure, it is in the end all the same. It is a math, one that the one’s-who-play-god use to control. A control that is a math that we accept and allow unless we begin to use that natural ability to accept one order of a math, and start using that ability to assess and investigate everything that is placed before us; the media, what information is sent through our schools, the values absorbed from our parents, the traditions followed that began from a practice developed over time in a more agricultural time. We have forgotten the math that built what and who we are, we have forgotten to see the math that is here, within each, and without as the measure of all things, to see what does no harm and what takes that which is good.

This is why, all research makes it clear that the more we read, the more we begin to see the patterns and realize that math, and begin to process what is the false math, done through limitation, a lie-by-omission, a not-the-whole-story, memorized- me memorialized!. When we move into the world and we run into mis-takes, we want to move into blame instead of correcting ourselves.  Blame is actually harder to be, than sorting things out. The ghost in the machine appears to be real. 

And so, our greatest strength becomes our greatest weakness. We become an imperfect measure, and we blame anything that does not fit into that measure. We are separated from the real richness of life as the physical. Yet, this ability to assess, to sense space and time, the fabric of the physical and the unequal measure sounded is the real capacity of what informs our greatest weakness.

We have as each accepted a math that in inferior to life. We are here, to make the choice to accept life or dissipate as easily as that projected light image. That image is believed to be more than life. It is called a personality. It is when you say something like “ I am more than her”or when you believe that your friend is less than you. It is when you believe that you must compete with your neighbor. It is when you look down on another human being, or animal, or politician. It is when you pay those taxes that are you paying homage to a false god, because you have allowed a system where someone that moves digits and numbers around on paper is more than a farmer. It is when you do not investigate the real math. It is when you do not realize that vaccines have never worked, from the beginning. It is when you don’t realize that our schools by design are not meant to teach you to be your real potential. It is when a parent places a child in front of a television, having forgotten who they are, because the seeds of information as taken in by the physical by the previous generation, seed the form of the tree that is to come. Each subsequent generation assaulted without and within by information that is by nature meant to distract you from who you really are. Yet, it is accepted and allowed, absorbed within and without.  A seed that cannot be thrown away, as there is a baby within that body of water/information. It can only be transformed back into focusing on what is real, the physical, seeing directly the separation and what is real. Our children are our greatest assets and yet they are the poorest amongst us!

A real star is a body in equilibrium with life. A  real star is cognizant of the math of life, of the very fabric ‘s composition. It is built of cells, joining together. A star is built of hydrogen and helium. These are cells, joined together. This is the real math,  not a grid line.  After all, hydro is water, and ‘ gen’ is information. Hence stars are the same as us, water in formation.  After all we are 70% water. We are coupled with oxygen as how the cells exist on earth. So ask yourself what you are resonating today, is it that which considers all things, taking that which is good and does no harm?  Are you in respect of the physical?

In order for me to really see the stars that are a part of the fabric of this world that is an information of cells and atoms, that is also me, as the same stuff, I must use my greatest strength to focus on the richness of this life that is physical in expression, as this is what is real.

Day 681 Our greatest gift becomes our greatest weakness and is the means to change.

I had a moment yesterday where a woman arrived while I was working with a child. The child was taking an assessment and the woman came and called out her name from a distance. I went and said to the woman that the child would be done in a moment. The woman reacted. 

Yet she turned away and stopped calling out to the student. I paused for a moment and then went up to her. I apologized for coming up and with the means to ask her to stop. She said some words to me, in a quiet temper. I then agreed with her.  

I could see her quiet down. It is like embracing something and not reacting to it, believing that it is an indication of me in any way. 

I also noticed that there was some fear in me, because I did not want the woman to be angry with me, my fear was that she would remain in ill will.  Also, I did have the thought that her reaction was over the top.  Yet while these things were moving slightly within me, I placed myself her in shoes and in an understanding of how insecure we can get about ourselves. 

Before I can change, I have to admit what it is that I am.  This means slowing down and assessing outside of a reaction.  For me, it was to calm the waters, so-to-speak, no matter what.

Within this process, as I agreed with the woman, I could see the ‘ sound’ of her, the tenor of her change. It was watching a demeanor move into calm, the storm quickly calming.

I also spent time with a boy in a state of spite. The moment he went into any fear he went into spite. Everything “sucked” for him.  Many times within working with him,  he would become calm, quiet down, and move forward. The absence of spite within him, revealed a very gentle and willing person. That gentle person was much more receptive than the reactive person who had begun, for reasons I cannot fathom in exact detail,  to practice spite, again and again.

Within all of this, it makes it obvious that we become what we practice. What we practice, in measure, as belief about the world around us, is what we become. Hence, we all learn the same way, we learn through repeating what we use as a measure, and a belief is a measure. Again, this is why the media repeats the same information again and again, a story that is a lie by omission.  And because we as humans, absorb, which is how we take in measure in all ways, so it is quantum, if we take in a measure and repeat, to understand it , and we do not investigate the measure, or, place it into a real life context,  we become that.  

In this, our greatest gift becomes our greatest weakness.  And that gift enables us to assess what we have accepted and change it. And that ability to change, can be used to assess the world around us because this is our absorbent ability that is the same as our ability to assess. Thus, nothing can define us, but what we accept and allow.

Overall, this is why self forgiveness in every moment to and towards all energetic reactions, as emotions and feelings, is so important. This is why being patient until the waters calm, and the person becomes soft, in and as gentle and open, willing to change, is necessary to get to a starting point that can and will move as what is best for all, because ultimately, that greatest gift is by nature a willing participant in life as this is the real value.

Day 621 What is the space and time of here? What has been accepted and allowed as me?

Space and time

As I was working with a child, I looked at the behaviors of the child as a sort of grounding mechanism. She had placed both her elbows on the table and with her fore arms perpendicular to the table, her hands moving as though the clapping of her thumb against her other four digits was her talking with another person, I realized she was having conversations with herself. I saw this as a sort of processing action, a comfort, as way to give some kind of order to her existence.

Instead of reacting, meaning to judge this, I just accepted it. It is here that I looked at this as something, as a movement that existed in the space and time of being here.

In this moment, I am the intervention, the directive to understand what is happening without any form of judgement, and to move into grounding the person here, as much as possible. So, like performing in a musical group, it is to simply pay attention to the moving parts and giving direction in what all interventions are, which is to practice being present here. This is to be in consideration of all things, because I live here, in a physical existence.

To this, I add a question. Does what our media, in all its forms, whether informative or entertainment, reflect the practice of actual living? No. The media in informative presentations, often touts potential bad things happening, and/or what good is being done with very little detail as to what is really going on. So much room for a ‘ lie by omission’ going on here because children would not be starving or dying of dis-ease that has accumulated in degree,  evident in the numbers because numbers do not lie. The real story in space and time is not conveyed. In the end, each of us are to blame, because we accept and allow it. This means we are placing something other than what is the real story, as having more value than making real what removes a lack of ease in being physically grounded here, this place right here where we are living.

When a tree is sick, do we blame the tree for not  growing well? Or, do we immediately look at the environment and assess what is lacking, what is causing the tree to not fill out in its full potential? Often, even with animals, we do the same. We say that the dog needs lessons , which is time and space to reform the behaviors.  This begs the question as to why we don’t see ourselves, humans, in this same way? How is a human formed and nurtured in presence measure and in physical sustenance that gives the building blocks of forming a ‘ sound’ tree?

In the end, there is no denying this, that when a human being is not grounded here, it is from lack. And since this earth is very abundant, the lack that is causing children to not be present, developing behaviors that are support mechanisms to reground- taking away space and time in their lives- is making that development second to what? It can only be a separation from being in the practice of what it means to exist as physical beingness. We become physical beingness when we consider that care of a tree, or a dog, well some, not all. And this is the point.  If we do not consider the practice of living, which is a physical living, then we are in separation from living. The consequences of this accumulate into destruction through lack of what supports that physical means and state of being.

What does this have to do with noticing the space and time presence of a child? The child is a reflection of what has been accepted and allowed.  Her processing  presence is like a musical formation, a thing of measure and tempo. Her behaviors her having of measure of understanding. Her actions, some search for structure to ground her. She intervenes herself to develop some coping mechanism. The child has created her own cognitive behavioral therapy to build some order, and that therapy is her own process of applying  behavior that help her analyze reality and within that the measures she has learned that are of values that are not equal in consideration of realizing that living is a physical action, as living demands form to exist which the physical is the means of. 

As a child, I remember working to be able to speak the same measure as my parents, to survive. It was my environment, so to move within the immediate confines of it, I had to take in the measure as beliefs, of my parents. It is like focusing my within to form their ideological measure. And then a movement to reflect that measure, in conversation. Somehow, overall, this was not easy, and then out in the world, realizations that what I had accepted and allowed within imitating the form of belief as my parents, was not always correct, as in not considering what was equal in all men, and instead comparing my belief with others. When those beliefs did not mesh, I rejected without taking the time to consider the measure of another. I was still in the habit from childhood, of taking in a particular measure, imitating it, not realizing its limitations, having gotten caught in the game. Then over time, realizing the limitation of my accepted and allowed construction of belief. my coping mechanisms ones of escape at times, because I did not understand what I had done, on a conscious level, as this conscious level was that part built in separation of being aware of my surroundings in total. Thus, sometimes I escaped my own melody I accepted. Other times I corrected this, even with silent embarrassment. I had to admit that I had separated from reality, done so slowly over time, I could still see the tree but forgot the forest. I was talking to my own construction, my own inner representation of reality, filled with value judgements that had no connection to the means of this building of life, the physical world.

The solution here is to reground myself’s measure within, back into the practice of living. To remeasure through deconstruction  of accepted limited belief  to reconstruct myself within to be equal to the means of life information as life would need to be, as this physical world. This world that bears this consequence of separation visible in accepting practices that are destructive that can change into practices that do no harm. This is practicing what supports physical reality. What supports is visible, in the same way that we approach taking care of a tree, or, as many already do, a dog, a cat, or any pet.  Anything that harms in any measure is simply unacceptable.  In the end it is ourselves hurting ourselves.

Day 443 Positive reinforcement, does it allow self discovery?

Positive reinforcement does it allow self discovery?

I have heard many schools say to me that they use positive reinforcement.Let’s look at this, especially in a group of peers where some have more exposure to a wider opportunity to explore and discover. If it is learned that knowing something gets a reward, the reward becomes greater than the discovery, self discovery. It has been said that self discovery if the strongest way to learn. So why, then do we have a predominance of positive reinforcement as an method believed that develop character? 

Imagine positive reinforcement being used in a classroom, the one who has figured something out letting everyone know and the verbal reward being given. Would this not interrupt the child that had not figured it out? Would this take away the self discovery of another? Would this breed constant comparison and judgement?

Allowing self discovery removes competition to win, and allows children to learn that discovery is the joy, which would breed a whole different character, one that realized the understanding within the self was  the value. Would this not develop an attitude of helping others. directing others to understand instead of being a game of comparison? With this approach, instead of wanting that colored star - for example - on your page, within yourself is the real value, that of understanding and the development that each of us, given enough time, can understand.

Realize that allowing and valuing self discovery would develop more of the practice of looking, which would develop the practice of following through and finding solutions.

In a profit based system, where money has been allowed to determine life, follow through and looking and problem solving are not valued assets beyond a certain point a couple of rungs up the ladder. And yet, behaviors that limit self discovery, such as a belief in constant positive reinforcement,  are a crime against life, the discovery of self as life. This life as self able to understand life because this is what we are as physical beings.

Discover yourself Desteni I Process Lite.

Day 364 Self Judgement Commitment Statements

If I read about some extreme injustice I become very angry and blame and react, so busy being blame that I no longer am here in common sense of the totality of what is here in earth and who I am as how I am within such a reaction. Then I have expectations that my righteousness will be understood and when it is not, I remain in ignorance singing the tune in and as my mind that another is ignorant or lack any semblance of care for another. Then I blame myself for not having made the situation clear enough, in some way. I remember before my husband died I kept thinking that the magic words must be there somewhere, I had simply not found them. And the answer was right there in front of me, it was what I had constructed as belief that was the separation, not the words individually, but how I used them, what I described, which lacked a complete understanding of what was going on. Even if I had placed my words to be clear, my husband had to take them and apply them himself, this I could not do, this was ultimately up to him, thus we are all to blame for what we allow, and cannot point the finger at anyone else.

I notice this tension in my legs, it is like they have this electrical circuitry that tenses them continuously and somehow, I am the cause of this as what I have accepted and allowed. So, I am attempting to write this out, as this is a behavior I have had for a very long time and it is going to take some time to slow this petrification of myself as how I am within me as how I am moving in detail as myself within.

It has even taken some time to see this, as I did this within my back and that took some time to get to relax. Self forgiveness is a much better tool than any drug. And I do not condone stopping drugs as they perhaps have a purpose for a moment.

I remember my father being able to hear an orchestral work and name the orchestra, the conductor, the piece. This was an ability to measure the character of these parts, which is to say the style of the conductor, and the orchestra and the piece were able to be heard through their combination of qualities. Which means that humans have the capacity to sense here in detail. There are those who can read every form water takes when frozen to understand the age of the ice, the strength of the ice, the atmospheric conditions slowly coming along. All of this is reading patterns, becoming familiar with this world. This intrinsic ability is the nature of the organic machine of the human, and the only reason it is not living up to this in full capacity is that it is denied development. I also think that the development of this is probably greater than any machine built by men today. Even though this within ourselves as humans has been suppressed for so long, we will probably need our inventions to help us discover what we are that some have achieved some level of ability within and as, to allow ourselves as life to be within our full potential as what we are as life, here.

In actuality, we have learned suppression, and this is maintained by a system, currently that is the manifestation of our own suppressions as life. We have completely separated ourselves from life, abdicated what we are as life, not realizing that the only way through to life is as ourselves. This is what was meant by going through the eye of the needle, one must become equal to the substance of life, to fit through, no machine we build is going to get us through, it is only equality and oneness to and as the starting point of life, the very substance of life, the “ sound” of life that is the building block equal and one within all of us. Must seem so abstract when looked at through a mind of chasing ideologies. Realizing these ideologies for what they are, idols to abdicate self responsibility as life, will seem like a death, but it is only a death of idol worship, as the only solution is to respect this actual physical world, as this is what is real. Heaven fed off of this, and it was a projection off the ground of earth. We have all been afraid of a lesser substance, and in the process become inferior to life. The joke is on you. And me. lol We are the creators of our own yokes.

So, I have this person I have known for many years. I went to a gathering with him. Now, he rants incessantly about how people are rude and ignore him. At this gathering there was another woman I have known for years, and I know her mother. Her mother is very much a mother in the traditional sense that she is constantly organizing and cleaning up, making sure things look in order. I know this because she owns a gallery and it is always in order, and this mother is constantly moving and tidying things up. She has been doing this for so long it is like habit as what she is. So, her daughter at this gathering was talking with me and my friend, when she suddenly turned and went to help someone she noticed was holding a bowl - as there was food at this gathering. The daughter went to get involved with the maintenance of the gathering, just like her mother, concentrating of this kind of detail, as though she could not help herself. I was looking at my friend as this happened in a moment, and the whole musculature of the face of my friend tensed and pursed.

We left the gathering and immediately in the car my friend started to go into the same rant about how people are rude and ignore him.  I said to him that this daughter was simply becoming her mother, becoming a role of taking care of the objects at the function, just life her mother, and that it really had nothing to do with my friend, she was simply becoming the habit she was taught. My friend said, I know - which he says all the time when something is pointed out - and continued to talk about how rude this behavior was.  I also know that the father and husband within this family does not believe that women should be in art. Which I will not explain here, so, I understand that this family has serious divisions within gender role play even in the face of this present world where women are more than capable of learning to draw and paint. There are probably layers of issues here that I will not go into, as the point is that it is beliefs, opinions and ideas that build our personalities and these beliefs, opinions and ideas playout in our behaviors, and it is all visible. Which is how my father could determine which conductor was conducting, which orchestra was performing and which piece was being played, and when it was written  and what culture it came from, as the details of the parts as the focus reveal the parts as what is not present and what is made huge and brought forward. And our divisions of quality create a persona that is readable, be it nation, country, tribe, family, gender, social level. All of these divisions where borders within the qualities are not allowed to be crossed, or so we believe.This organization has created separation and difficulty in communication, and this earth is in constant war and strife, thus, what we have created within all this is not working, our existential order is one of destruction and not life and therefor this must change. It is an order of limitation, the parts in themselves not bad, just simply ordered in such a way life is denied, withheld, and lacking communication as the parts with one another. Naturally, there are a few benefitting from this. Which begs the question, are they really? An ease of communication in totality would be a more fulfilling life, this cannot be denied. It is common sense.

So, what is it that is able to “ read” all of this” Can an idea “ read “ this” What is it that takes in all the “ sound “ of this and has some common sense of the parts, if this is developed? And can this “ reader” of here that is each of us, be taken into limited behaviors of blame and spite based in limited insight, as my friend was allowing himself to exist as, based on an idea of himself and what was needed to validate him? And why did he need a specific behavior the lack of which caused a reaction of blame and spite? All of this so silly because it is all wanting something that has no common sense of here, is of no communication of here as being life, living life here, learning to sense here and enjoy simply being here, learning to be and become equal and one in communication with life as what is substantial, here. This is why singular ideas as imagination are pointless, they are fantasies made huge and thus a separation from physical reality. We are actually living a language of fantasy, and this is based on the culture in which we were born. A selection of values creating a persona, and that fantastic persona is very limited. Were it not then an ease of communication would exist on earth. And it does not. Also, had we this, what knowledge and information presented by the media would have outcomes that were agreeable to all, and what is storied on the media is not doing this. The media only plays to each persona losing itself causing fear, instead of directing each of us to understand and stand as life in self responsibility.

And such attention deficit disorder is disordering life, as this is used to allow some to have more than others, and we allow this, because we are so caught up in blame and spite, idea and opinion, our thoughts that are judgements are ideas that something is more than another instead of placing what is here as expression into context with the physical real world, and in so doing this we separate ourselves from life, and our separation, our projection consumes the physical and we become habituated within our ideas, that are taught by those who were before us doing the same, and thus we end, we cannot move through the eye of the needle because we were never here, instead we were in our minds, believing our thoughts to be real our judgements to be real. These judgements when continued become emotions and feelings and then they become our behaviors, our personifications which are then constantly seeking validation, the memores as judgements wanting to be right, wanting a right to life, which is believing an illusion, being the lie of separation and suppression of self as life being here, reading here, understanding here as the physical is the gift to bring self here to allow equality and oneness to and as life here. 

I have to within myself see my own judgements that are separations from life, as what i was taught, not all good or bad, but simply limited, and as this a suppression of myself as life. 

The only solution is to take what I have used as ideas and beliefs and opinions as judgement of what is more than and less than, superior and inferior and bring these back to myself, take what is good and what prevents disease with here, and direct within the principle of what is best for all, even in the face of reaction and protection and defense of personification as behaviors of ego, which is to bring a limitation/ambiguity back to equal and one consideration of practical needs of physical reality, as it is the physical which is the source of life, not a heaven, not the idea touted by a media owned by a corporation that has an idea that it can determine what people need, as believing one knows what people need is to deny the actual physical world being more than able to determine what is needed as the physical is its own technology able to take care of itself, as it can “ read” here as it is life, the very source of life. Taking care of the physical world and allowing it to be what it is, especially the human, to be and become what it is capable of is the only solution, as this is the way of life. And that is just common sense.

Our economic system is not on par with life, it does not support life, it does not prevent disease, poverty, sexual abuse, ignorance, pollution, killing, animal abuse, soil erosion.  Fractional reserve banking within interest lending allows the interests of a few to not only serve in self interest, but use the profits as the principle, divided again and again under names of a different color, move the separated values into building a war machine to capture and divide resource and information; our media being the projector of limited information to diminish understanding and yoke understanding within limited means, all done in self interest with the idea projected that one hand feeds us despite physical fact that it takes many many hands to have built and to built what exists, making it very obvious that the outward manifestation as the order of this system is simply a macrocosm of what we are each allowing and accepting within ourselves on and individual/micro level as consciousness as thoughts as judgements as idea that one thing is more than another, when the order of equality as all being of same substance in expression in different rhythms as what is needed to be the physical world working as an expression of life, meaning on a practical level that physical skill is not more than intellectual skill as both are needed to support life, as where we stand at the moment. 

So, when and as I find myself imagining via a hierarchy of values about another, analyzing them and placing them on a scale of more and less value I stop and I breath, and I see realize and understand that they are me and I am them, that the present system as consciousness as mind, as personification of limited ideas, beliefs and opinions, exposing themselves within and as me as thoughts, that when repeated and used as directive, become emotions, and feelings, as fear of loss and justification for an action taken to hide the negative judgement in and as limitation and thus separation from here, I slow myself down and I direct within and as the principle of what is best for all, realizing that within directing as such, behaviors of protection and defense of personality will react in self interest, and here I continue to remain within and as breath, and to not allow myself to become inferior to the bully of the mind, and/or judge myself as superior as the only choice is to become the living word within and as what is best for all.

When and as I find myself reacting to a fear of being judged, I stop and breath, and I see, realize and understand that I allow myself to be judged as judgement need only be directed within and as what is best for all, of which is visible as all life on earth being cared for and developed within the inherent nature of man as a physical being to and towards communicating as life in awareness and consideration of all life, as is the nature of life.

When and as I find myself imagining a loss, I stop and I breath and i bring myself back here, and realize that the only thing that can be lost are thoughts as ideas, opinions and beliefs that are not in accord with life, with what is best for all,  and that the mind is an imagination and not what is real, here as the physical, thus the only choice is to stop and breath and bring myself here realizing what is supportive of life absolutely through care for this actual physical world, which means I have to place myself here and accept the physical as me, as what is real.

When and as I find myself moving towards a behavior as a reaction, as spite and blame, as comparison and competition, I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down to “read”/look at the actual physical world here, to no longer allow myself to judge on a scale, through a scale, of more than and less than, and instead to look at what is real as the physical and to use my common sense to investigate what works as support absolutely, or to direct within what would support the physical world to prevent disease and allow the life that is here to become directive as itself within and as equality and oneness as what is best for all.

When and as I find myself tensing up in my legs I stop and I breath, and I take the time to slow down and see what I am allowing and accepting in terms of judgement as blame and spite, comparison and competition, that is myself suppressing myself as life into a mental fantasy of limited qualities selected as associations learned, and I direct without fear of loss within and as the principle of what is best for all, thus I walk through my smoke screen of fears as separations being used as label for protection and defense, of self abdication and I speak within common sense of what is best for all here.

When and as I begin to point out how the present system functions as a system of inequality, as a system that begins within each and every one of us, I stop and I breath and I do not allow myself to become inferior to here, within and as blame and spite, judgement of more than and less than via comparison and competition, as I take the principle of what is best for all is best for self, and I direct within this principle as myself as life, to begin to redirect this behavior of suppression I have accepted and allowed that is my own behavior of limitation in being equal and one to and as life, here.

When and I have a thought that something has been “ done unto me” I stop and I breath, and I realize that there is a whole past of judgement behind me, resonantly held within as belief, opinion and idea that broadcasts it separation via thoughts, emotions and feelings, which I no longer allow to be the experience of myself here, as I walk this through forgiving this back to myself and directing this within correcting this towards what is best for all via being equal and one with and as this actual physical world, as this is what is real and not the imaginations in and as my mind, as consciousness.

When and as I find myself allowing myself to believe I am being coerced, I stop and I breath, and I stop the circular logic as thoughts of bad and good, more than and less than, loss and gain, reward and punishment, and I take this catch 22 and see, realize and understand what would be best for all, placing the physical as myself here, investigating and speaking up within what is directive here in equality and oneness as what supports the physical world absolutely.

Desteni DIP Self forgiveness to deprogram the separation from life to and towards becomeing equal and one with and as life. Stop the mind of separation. Come back to the physical. Birth Yourself as life. There is no other choice.

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Day 239 Behavior Dimension : Victim Character

Behavior Dimension : Victim Character

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand what I am reacting as physically within and as judgement as the movement from a judgement of less than to more than in and as the mind, as consciousness, as an act of separation from equality and oneness as life, into a projection of myself as a personality, wherein I fragment reality losing focus of this actual physical world, as the present system of inequality distorting through limited values made huge instead of directing myself in equality and oneness here, focusing on what is real as the physical world, that which supports me as life, as what I am one and equal to.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that within this memory of myself standing and facing my friend sitting within a new group of girls, and no longer having to do with me, at that moment as this image as this memory, with energetic emotions and feelings, as personifications as what I believed myself to be within self judgement, as being less, as having lost something, as I judged myself less because I did not have what this new group of girls offered, and within this going into a belief that the values my friend was following were of less value that other values one could follow, where this in itself was a judgement of same nature, in separation as I made myself superior and the actions of my friend inferior, as a reaction to myself feeling less than as I compared, ignoring what was happening within existence and remained in judgement in and as my mind.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the sinking, falling, inner crying, like a sinking down from my head through my chest was a self accepted and allowed emotion of having no value, of being worthless, of losing something within a belief in a face value within society, that in reality bore no witness to the actual physical world.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that within this feeling, sensation of falling, sinking, inner crying, my breath became labored, and heavy, uneasy and difficult, and within this a “holding in: of myself - so to speak- as I was embarrassed that someone might see me having a care that my friend had abandoned me for a “cooler group”, where I within and as myself judged myself on the same values that drove my friend to join the group.

Within this, I commit myself to seeing realizing and understanding that this physical behavior was a reaction to a limited perception of reality, a morality, as a collection of values taught as judgements that enabled survival within a system that did not in fact understand the workings of consciousness as a separation into and as energy playing out values of more than and less than, of superiority and inferiority, as polarities of inequality, an act of spite and blame, causing friction and conflict within myself, this being a separation from equality and oneness with the actual real forgiving physical world as creation, as life, as simply being here, communicating with and as life here, equal and one to all the dimensions of expression as life, here.

I commit myself to seeing realizing and understanding that there are no values of worth and unworth of myself as life, unless I accept and allow them, as I am life here, able to focus and direct myself, in practical common sense of this physical world, where myself as life, cannot be lost, where myself as life can only exist within equality and oneness with what is real, as the physical through utilizing common sense of the physical as what is best for all is best for self.

I commit myself to breathing, to when and as I notice this physical reaction of falling/sinking/ diminishing as a movement within myself as energy, to stop, breath, and become the correction of myself here, realizing that this whole mapping out of a hierarchy and placement of myself within such, was as moving as belief in a more than and less than, into energy, a distraction and separation from actual physical , equal and one living, from becoming aware of myself as life, participating with what is real as the physical.

I commit myself to , when and as I find myself reliving this same physical behavior, to stop and to breath, to simply remain here,  within practical physical existence, to stop participation in and as the mind that exists within relationships defining myself, and to realign myself to myself as life, to direct myself to focus myself here, equal and one with and as the physical in common sense.

Desteni

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Day 221 Behavoirs of conjecture

My sons would have friends over to the house. Sometimes the behaviors were unacceptable. I would want to make a statement that this, or that friend was no longer allowed at the house. I would also feel quilt about this, and also get behaviors from my children as a consequence. Reactions of anger. So, I had to try and explain. Eventually, I got the the point where I would say that the friend had many qualities that were fine; for instance one friend would play a lot of guitar, and he taught my son to play - this was fine. Then I would go onto explain that it was some of his behaviors that I found unacceptable, it was the emotional storms the friend would go into that were not only unacceptable but dangerous. This one friend tended to brake things in the house, in some kind of reckless abandon. So, I told my son, that I could not let this behavior into the house, as it was a behavior that was not in the best interests of my son…. as well.
I even talked with the boy one time and tried to get him to see this. But it did not stop.
Needless to say, one night the boy took my car and drove himself home, without asking. These are the kinds of things this child did. At the moment, when my son is home, this other boy is not here. He has been cast out from being allowed in the house. He would come and apologize, but then, inevitably come and do something like this again.

With this boy, most of the time, he was polite, in that he would say hello, sometimes come and talk to me, we even played together a couple of times. But then suddenly, it was like he was possessed with a desire for something, like he was afraid he was going to lose something. And then the reckless anger ( perhaps ALL anger is reckless!) would take some action and something would be broken, and he would go running out into the yard breaking things. Something was obviously bothering him and whatever it was he had to get it under control.

Some “ idea” had become his state of mind, lol, his state of being as mind, as a limited sense, caught up in some desire to placate his fear of some loss needing justification within some kind of attention.

A noun, can also be a state of being. A thing. So a person becomes a state of being, within desire, want or need, as behavior, driven by the e(ergy)motion to meet that supposed “need”, so possessed, what is here is forgotten. And it has nothing to do with what is actually here. ( Unless ofcourse, you are a starving child, starving because some “states” within this world, like the United STATEs, believe themselves to be in need, so possessed by their own consumerism that a perpetual tantrum exists within want that this possessions ignores what is actually here.)

If we, the human, were taught to be here, as in seeing what is actually here, and how what is here functions, instead of being told we cannot understand what is here, ( I mean, there arefarmers in the Swiss Alps who read the plants to determine the weather!) the only place to go is into conjecture, and on what basis would such a thing exist? How can it be believed that “here” cannot be understood, and then decide conjecture, as what is not here or physically validated, then be understood and/or followed as being a guide? This is just a man-u-factured illusion actually blocking common sense! Also, if looking at here, at nature, one notices a tree looking unhealthy, then what is needed is to see what is missing from the tree that it requires to become healthy, this is simply seeing a lack within requirement physically.

If a behavior is not dealing with what is actually physically here, then it is an idea, belief, or opinion, imagination, judgement based on some limited viewpoint, believing some kind of attention is necessary that has no real value or self directive capacity as what the physical, in common sense, is able to do!. So the physical world is actually a directive within being here with what is real. So anything that creates a fantasy, such as pictures on a tube, or words on a page, cannot be taken as what is, as it is a picture drawn of something real and not the real thing. So, a state of being, as a desire, want and need fixed into some fantasy and imagination that cannot even be verbally expressed, and ends up as a behavior that is reckless and destructive in missing/wanting some relationship not being made, and that, probably within some agenda or made huge emotional need, like a strategic planning to get something. I mean, just think about the whole sex seeking scenario, it is the same. And occupying. Thus, there can be no such thing as self interest only, because we are on a physical planet that functions within specific forms, all working together. Force actions of monoculture on this, and use a force of creating some invisible scenario, limited in design to create that monoculture and what is real is destroyed as it is taken apart to be placed into a lesser design. In this way, the physical is the gift of what works, so it is to become with what is actually here, to be here, seeing, looking at what works here, where what is here allows what works to actually be seen. A real “god”/parent would not have conjecture, only abuse would use conjecture, for personal gain. And what happens if this “conjecture” is taught to children? As what is real? And it goes on for generations? Welcome to hell on earth!

So, obviously, the present system of invisible hands, and invisible gods is a travesty of conjecture. It is not here, existing with what is actually here. To keep this limited illusion that uses what is actually here, our children are educated into the illusion and not taught to work with what actually physically exists. And they are fed images via TV, and sugar to keep them in some excited STATE in separation from here. I think I would run outside my house and want to break things too, but this is not a solution. The solution, is to come back to what is here, as the physical. To investigate what has been accepted and allowed, and to stop, to allow equal and one understanding with what is here, the physical world.

An Equal Money System will allow those who presently are actually looking in common sense of what is physically here, before they are asked to skew data to suit profit, to do what the actual physical world reveals. As of now, what the actual physical world needs, in may places where children are starving, is not being met. Even though this world is able to send aid, and distribute guns, and get drugs over borders in government planes ( interesting how the government resembles what was considered Mafia behavior more and more everyday as the monoculture begins to crumble) , and organize school systems to indoctrinate, and get telephone wires and radio waves everywhere to broadcast things. With all this, a system ofcommunication and transportation already exists. And obviously since there is massive amounts of food wasted every day, there is enough food.

It is like, instead of understanding how water works and functions and all its properties, what exists is a system where a few are allowed to build a structure that allows them to control that water, where so much effort and energy is spent on getting this human control, instead of actually developing an understanding of what water is in totality, and sharing that understanding with every human so that each and every human has an understanding, and thus respect for that water! In this way, what exists is a crime, as it actually blocks understanding of the substance here on earth supporting life, and instead teaches the structure that allow one/ a few to be dominant. And look at that water, it is all the same, as a water molecule, existing within its nature to do what it does - which i do not understand because I have never had the opportunity to be taught this because I was taught to serve the ONE as role play of dominator. That/this is really really messed up.
Even that “dominator” does not understand water, because if they did they would become as that water, this substance spread all over this earth giving freely, being itself as what it is, able to be understood if the attentions of men were not drawn away from this actual physical world!
To think that water can be owned means that you are a zombie - as we tell ourselves with the movies we make- and have become the good servant of a system of ignorance of life, that you have accepted and allowed the diversion from self as life, and are caught up in an illusion and conjecture, where this illusion determines your behavior, a behavior developed to be ignorance! Thus, man has become the blind leading the blind.

Generations generating ignorance.

TIme to start playing on the band wagon of life, pick up your instrument of life, your human physical body, and support Equal Money, and walk the process of realignment back to the physical and away from a taught conjecture. All the king’s men and all the king’s horses cannot put you back together again. But, the good news is, that you can do it yourself as Desteni. Start with a free course; Desteni I Process Lite. You will never look back, as life is better than a dream in front of your television set.

The Century of Self : Part 1 Happiness Machines

http://youtu.be/prTarrgvkjo

Psywar

http://metanoia-films.org/psywar/

The Trap

http://archive.org/details/AdamCurtis_TheTrap

The Power Principle

http://metanoia-films.org/the-power-principle/

Human Resources: Social Engineering in the 20th Century

http://metanoia-films.org/human-resources/

Catastroika - Greek Documentary

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoNjVMhmBfM

The Marketing of Madness

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=vnuMhlPn9TA#!

Desteni

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Journey To Life

Heaven's Journey To Life

Creation's Journey To Life

Earth's Journey To Life