How and when did I begin to separate into the fixation as fear, seeking the good “feeling” of validation, mimicking the adults?
So, in not looking, in the dictate of “ don’t look” I have to question why such thought would even exist. I mean why be this, why be a “not looking” at what is here? This in and of itself is a red flag. Life would not be an action of “don’t look”! Life would be live, look, understand, exist, be.
Thus, when I do not look here, when the voice in and as my mind says, “don’t look” I need to stop and to breath, and to slow myself down and to stand within and as what is physically real, to look at the words present , to realize where the words are of ambiguity, where they lack a defining of what is here as what is best for all, where such words disinform what is actually physically happening with the work of the hands of men, as this is what is real, to be and become self responsible within and as what exists within actions taken and the consequence to and towards the actual physical, to put an end to limited self interest, which is the interest of money moving to a few, to maintain an illusory existence in separation from common sense of the actual sustaining physical world.
This is to become the living word , the equal and one consideration of the actual physical world, and how what we allow and accept has consequences in the physical world.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to listen to a voice, in and as my mind that says, “ don’t look, don’t look”.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to exist within and as allowing myself to constrict into “ don’t look”
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear being punished, to fear being bullied, and to run from this into and as verifying not being punished through getting attention that validates myself, within and as having the focus and attention from others being one that lacks an action of punishment, where the validation is a “feel good” energetic experience, as I have “won” the absence of punishment through interaction with another, as my parents for example, of having communication that is not of punishment, as blame and spite and name calling and spanking, where the communication is praise, of “light weight” “happy face” conversation, vapid, of verbal diarrhea, this that avoids looking here, realizing what is here as self as life, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that when and as I allow myself to “not look” I then have accepted the consequence of participating within ignorance of what is best for all as the physical, and within this non-looking to maintain my separation, my survival is a laziness within being equal and one with and as the real actual physical world,
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to within this, drive myself to ensure that I will not be discovered and punished, cast out and ignored through non compliance of entering limited conversations, which I enter to survive, and then become addicted to the praise and friendship in and as energy as the positive feeling where I then seek this attention in self validation, thus making/allowing/justifying the separation from myself as common sense of the actual physical world as myself and how I am here within and as the physical as I include the physical as myself, from a starting point of fearing punishment and an action to ensure that punishment is kept at bay, distant, where what must be realized is that in fearing punishment, an action, a state of being as energy exists, in seeing only punishment and not looking in common sense at what is actually physically here, and within this to not become blame and spite and finger pointing, but to look and to direct self responsibly within and as what is best for all, including the physical, the ecology and the economy being equal and one on earth.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become comfortable within this seeking of praise to “feel good” within and as energy as mind, in separation from looking here, being here, speaking in common sense, within realizing ecology is equal and one to economy, meaning the physical is what is real, as this is life, where this “feel good” is an avoidance tactic in looking at what is common sense, and a reaction to fear of being punished for questioning the limited self interest, ambiguity and disinformation presented within a design of inequality as self interest lacking awareness of the actual sustaining real physical world.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that this is the confusion many children face, where this confusion is an inability to speak up in common sense, of the physical as a vocabulary has not developed, this which is used by the present system to maintain a belief that self interest, as those on the top of the pyramid cannot see anything else but their existence of comfort and believe this to be the way it is, by some illusory belief in a divine right, which is a total disconnect from physical reality, so evident in the state of the earth within the amount of poverty, sexual abuse, starvation and damage to the environment.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become righteous within and as this, which is my self not slowing down and using common sense within and as deconstructing what is unacceptable, which will take the physical action of many, thus the idea of a super hero is an illusion, as we must all stand and be self responsible, which means walking through what self has accepted and allowed as mind as separation from common sense of the substance of life, as what this physical world is one and equal to and as.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to avoid facing my own separations from and as myself as life here, into and as mind, to exist within and as a fear of being shut out, within and as speaking up in common sense.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that in avoiding here, in fearing to speak up, I allowed myself to become righteous about issues separate from myself with which to be righteous, instead of walking in common sense here, with every breath, all of this a way to justify my own immediate fear of facing the bully in and as the mind, as I had found a comfortable way to keep the bully of “don’t look” at bay.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that in order to face the systemic allowance of a dis-regard for life, a non-looking at life as the physical, I as myself must realize my own separations from common sense here and the character in validation protection and defense through seeking praise to establish security as ignoring what is here in common sense, to avoid confrontation and discord to and towards what does not make sense, what is of ambiguity and dis-information , to see realize and understand that the crime is to not point out what is in separation from looking in common sense of what is here in totality, this physical world being life.
I commit myself to, when and as i become a sense of fear, as a sense of falling, within and as coming from my solar plexus area, I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down, to not allow myself to become this sense of falling, of fear, and within this to begin to practice becoming self responsible and self directed within and as common sense, standing before reaction within and as my mind, and without as the voice of fear as separation from common sense, and I look here, practice looking here, taking the words that are presented here, and bring them back into and as being a living word in practical common sense interest within and as what is best for all, here.
I commit myself to walking one step at a time within practicing facing this fear that has a voice that is “ don’t look, don’t look” with a thought that in not looking I will appear to “fit in” with the status quo, which will end, if I continue, with a life not having been lived, as less was the stance taken to ensure survival, instead of self becoming equal and one to and as the living word, this being self living in equal consideration of all life, as life being the value, self living equal and one here without value judgements of more than and less than, and instead looking at what is here in practical common sense, where even the movements and structure of men can be seen realized and understood.
Showing posts with label validation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label validation. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Saturday, November 24, 2012
Day 215 Reaction/behavior within self validation
Reaction/behavior within self validation, as in self having, or not having value.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become shy within believing that what i have to say is not of import either as insignificant or disruptive, where i allow myself to exist as judgement instead of actually looking at what is here, practically within this physical world, investigating and realizing what is best for all, instead of judging myself within this and getting lost in some idea of not having any value merely because of another idea of believing I should get some kind of attention, when if I look, it is not about getting attention, as this is about being more than another in the perceptions of a group or situation where attention allows a more than situation within climbing a ladder socially within a society of survival as money determines life, and thus creation becomes meaningless as all that is sought is money in a belief that having this really means one is living, when in effect it is not, it is the existence of a nondevelopment of self as creator as life, ending in a death of physical diminishment instead of a life transcended.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that value judgements of myself or another are a behavior of not actually looking at what is here as substance as life, where the words constructed as what the human presently speaks and is presented with in media, family, education, society, are in effect ignoring the substance of life as common sense, and instead, supporting only what supports the very nature of a profit based system, as system of divide and conquer, of grab that resource, of ensure a constant dividend, this a construction of survival and not of support of life, where what is actual development of every thing on this planet involves taking the steps necessary to increase awareness through intell-sense of this actual physical world in and as the actual physical self , instead of knowledge and information accumulation development, as what presently exists.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that this present system begins with the child and programs in religion, more than and less than values, knowledge and information without practical physical application to allow the child to see whether what is taught in word and picture actually is what physically exists, and thus, does the child develop a program of ideas, beliefs, and opinions without any physical actual awareness of what physically actually exists, which is a diminishment of human potential, and a crime against life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become the behavior of blame and anger within this, as this is so obvious, it makes no sense that the human does not stand up and see this.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that if fear is what rules, within this game of the devil, then he who generates the mostfear wins.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that this means that earth is in essence hell, and that perhaps the only message here is to make it very clear that unless this world changes, the hell as earth is only going to get much worse, thus, it is time to stand up and stop this game of seeking value within a system of more than and less than, as capitalism and to make it clear that unless I/we realize the value is life, and stand up and generate fear, a fear greater than the devil behavior allowed to exist on earth as politics, and debt and private ownership of freely given resources, the destruction this ignorance of the substance of life allows/creates, will continue the absence of what is an expression of life as the substance, equal and one in all that is the composition of earth, will end for the human, and what will be left is the snail, a creation of substance so much more aware than any human, and thus deserving of life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become a behavior of self doubt, as this is myself moving within limited insight, and this an abdication of self direction within and as an intellsense of this actual physical world as a form in function of expression itself as life, equal and one to what is real, this actual physical world.
I forgive myself for not seeing realizing and understanding that behaviors of want need, and desire, questions directed in and as a want need and desire, such as “ why can;t I have”, or “why is this not happening” or “ why does he/she …”, basically all questions involving a comparison, signifying a competition to have an aspect of the values presented by consumerism, where the accumulation of the objects to fit the lifestyle picture, do nothing to support this world, as the development of self as an idea of what is supportive of what is really just building an idol hoping to invoke an outcome of goodness in being a presentation of support, and is not actually actual support. It is like we are all chanting invocations instead of stopping and breathing and looking at what is actually here, and becoming one and equal in understanding with this actual physical world, developing an ability to actually be aware of what is this physical world, just as the snail, or the butterfly, as the interviews available at Eqafe.com.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize that those childhood stories, like “The Incredible Journey” where the two dogs and the cat cross a continent to find their owners tells of a sense that is within the animals that is lacking within the human, despite all the programs of religion and education impulsed into the human, we are not as aware as a dog that has never gone to school, or prayed to a god on their knees in a church. I mean, the destruction within the complacency of the human, as they are hypnotized by the television, is destroying this planet, and unless we stand and face what we are hiding from, in choosing to sit in front of a TV. that thing we fear is going to show up at our doorstep, and then, the television impaired person will be so ill with chemicals and so obese, it will be a really long walk, and there is no other way than to face the walk, so, waiting will only make it harder, so I suggest turning off the tv. and starting with the desteni lite FREE course to realize that emotions, feelings and thoughts are the voices of separation from becoming one and equal as life in actual movement with and as the physical, this gift for self to realize self as life, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to be the behavior of frustration, the thin, substanceless/holy fabric, the being of myself as losing a sense of space as I am directing myself within a limited design of frustration and blame as what I become, in impatience as it all seems too obvious, where what is necessary is to walk the separations into and as thoughts, emotions and feelings, within and without aligning such separations back into and as a intellsense as common sense of how this physical world works in mathematical precision, a technology so great , yet so ignored, by a limited human mind caught up in polarities of more than and less than in a fear of loss, this behavior having created the very existent system of inequality known as capitalism and/or any other centralized regime that decides a profit of more than is deserving of a few, where de-serving in and as itself as the sound of the word implies, actually sounds the opposite of serving, as in giving as one would like to receive as life, the words that have been given as a means to become life.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that even within this one blog, I have moved from one behavior to another, as though I go through some cadence of self pity into self righteousness, and try to piece myself back together again into being a directive principle within and as what is best for all, not allowing myself to become lost in an emotional, feeling behavior where I am hypnotized into and as energy- the voice of blame and spite, instead of directing myself within and as what is best for all, as what will walk through separation into being absolutely directive, here, where i take this being in and as fear and i stand and i direct this back into and as myself in common sense to develop an ability to face the storm of separation in and as the mind as energy to be and become like a pied piper of equality and oneness to allow all that exists on this earth to become itself as an expression of life, so that heaven on earth can be what is the nature of ourselves as life here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become shy within believing that what i have to say is not of import either as insignificant or disruptive, where i allow myself to exist as judgement instead of actually looking at what is here, practically within this physical world, investigating and realizing what is best for all, instead of judging myself within this and getting lost in some idea of not having any value merely because of another idea of believing I should get some kind of attention, when if I look, it is not about getting attention, as this is about being more than another in the perceptions of a group or situation where attention allows a more than situation within climbing a ladder socially within a society of survival as money determines life, and thus creation becomes meaningless as all that is sought is money in a belief that having this really means one is living, when in effect it is not, it is the existence of a nondevelopment of self as creator as life, ending in a death of physical diminishment instead of a life transcended.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that value judgements of myself or another are a behavior of not actually looking at what is here as substance as life, where the words constructed as what the human presently speaks and is presented with in media, family, education, society, are in effect ignoring the substance of life as common sense, and instead, supporting only what supports the very nature of a profit based system, as system of divide and conquer, of grab that resource, of ensure a constant dividend, this a construction of survival and not of support of life, where what is actual development of every thing on this planet involves taking the steps necessary to increase awareness through intell-sense of this actual physical world in and as the actual physical self , instead of knowledge and information accumulation development, as what presently exists.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that this present system begins with the child and programs in religion, more than and less than values, knowledge and information without practical physical application to allow the child to see whether what is taught in word and picture actually is what physically exists, and thus, does the child develop a program of ideas, beliefs, and opinions without any physical actual awareness of what physically actually exists, which is a diminishment of human potential, and a crime against life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become the behavior of blame and anger within this, as this is so obvious, it makes no sense that the human does not stand up and see this.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that if fear is what rules, within this game of the devil, then he who generates the mostfear wins.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that this means that earth is in essence hell, and that perhaps the only message here is to make it very clear that unless this world changes, the hell as earth is only going to get much worse, thus, it is time to stand up and stop this game of seeking value within a system of more than and less than, as capitalism and to make it clear that unless I/we realize the value is life, and stand up and generate fear, a fear greater than the devil behavior allowed to exist on earth as politics, and debt and private ownership of freely given resources, the destruction this ignorance of the substance of life allows/creates, will continue the absence of what is an expression of life as the substance, equal and one in all that is the composition of earth, will end for the human, and what will be left is the snail, a creation of substance so much more aware than any human, and thus deserving of life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become a behavior of self doubt, as this is myself moving within limited insight, and this an abdication of self direction within and as an intellsense of this actual physical world as a form in function of expression itself as life, equal and one to what is real, this actual physical world.
I forgive myself for not seeing realizing and understanding that behaviors of want need, and desire, questions directed in and as a want need and desire, such as “ why can;t I have”, or “why is this not happening” or “ why does he/she …”, basically all questions involving a comparison, signifying a competition to have an aspect of the values presented by consumerism, where the accumulation of the objects to fit the lifestyle picture, do nothing to support this world, as the development of self as an idea of what is supportive of what is really just building an idol hoping to invoke an outcome of goodness in being a presentation of support, and is not actually actual support. It is like we are all chanting invocations instead of stopping and breathing and looking at what is actually here, and becoming one and equal in understanding with this actual physical world, developing an ability to actually be aware of what is this physical world, just as the snail, or the butterfly, as the interviews available at Eqafe.com.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize that those childhood stories, like “The Incredible Journey” where the two dogs and the cat cross a continent to find their owners tells of a sense that is within the animals that is lacking within the human, despite all the programs of religion and education impulsed into the human, we are not as aware as a dog that has never gone to school, or prayed to a god on their knees in a church. I mean, the destruction within the complacency of the human, as they are hypnotized by the television, is destroying this planet, and unless we stand and face what we are hiding from, in choosing to sit in front of a TV. that thing we fear is going to show up at our doorstep, and then, the television impaired person will be so ill with chemicals and so obese, it will be a really long walk, and there is no other way than to face the walk, so, waiting will only make it harder, so I suggest turning off the tv. and starting with the desteni lite FREE course to realize that emotions, feelings and thoughts are the voices of separation from becoming one and equal as life in actual movement with and as the physical, this gift for self to realize self as life, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to be the behavior of frustration, the thin, substanceless/holy fabric, the being of myself as losing a sense of space as I am directing myself within a limited design of frustration and blame as what I become, in impatience as it all seems too obvious, where what is necessary is to walk the separations into and as thoughts, emotions and feelings, within and without aligning such separations back into and as a intellsense as common sense of how this physical world works in mathematical precision, a technology so great , yet so ignored, by a limited human mind caught up in polarities of more than and less than in a fear of loss, this behavior having created the very existent system of inequality known as capitalism and/or any other centralized regime that decides a profit of more than is deserving of a few, where de-serving in and as itself as the sound of the word implies, actually sounds the opposite of serving, as in giving as one would like to receive as life, the words that have been given as a means to become life.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that even within this one blog, I have moved from one behavior to another, as though I go through some cadence of self pity into self righteousness, and try to piece myself back together again into being a directive principle within and as what is best for all, not allowing myself to become lost in an emotional, feeling behavior where I am hypnotized into and as energy- the voice of blame and spite, instead of directing myself within and as what is best for all, as what will walk through separation into being absolutely directive, here, where i take this being in and as fear and i stand and i direct this back into and as myself in common sense to develop an ability to face the storm of separation in and as the mind as energy to be and become like a pied piper of equality and oneness to allow all that exists on this earth to become itself as an expression of life, so that heaven on earth can be what is the nature of ourselves as life here.
The Century of Self : Part 1 Happiness Machines
Psywar
The Trap
The Power Principle
Human Resources: Social Engineering in the 20th Century
Catastroika - Greek Documentary
The Marketing of Madness
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Thursday, October 18, 2012
Day 179 Self validation
Day 179
Self Validation
Every moment I start talking about myself, I am in essence validating myself, as I have to describe, verbally to another what I am, which is in essence not allowing that person to actually see what I am, and instead I am dictating what I am. And most of the time, not wanting anyone else to talk, just so I can get all my words in as what I am wanting to be told. Makes me think of judges on benches. I had jury duty, and the “judge” gave a lecture at the end to the ones who were not placed through the lottery onto the jury, and gave a speech about how import the service was, and how the ones NOT chosen had missed an opportunity. Meanwhile, there were policemen in the room and no one in the crowd was allowed to talk. So the judge was talking about how wonderful is/was system - how successful- and how other countries are coming to America to learn the same model. Yet no one was allowed to speak up for or against this! And then he went on to talk about how wonderful democracy is. Meanwhile, the whole picture and interaction is the opposite of democracy. No one is allowed to talk, to raise their hand and speak, all that is actually physically taking place is a dictation from a bench on high talking about how wonderful this situation is.
I won’t go into the amount of abuse existent on earth at this moment, that is real, the point here is that a judge sitting on a bench TELLING me that this system is wonderful and not allowing any other voice, does not make this system wonderful when in actuality there is enough evidence that it is NOT. But then again, the need for the policement in the room, and the need for silence from anything other than the voice on the pedestal on the bench is a VERY CLEAR indication - of a structure and force of denial and suppression in self interest, that no words saying it is good can deny.
Which reveals that if something needs to say it is good, needs to validate itself as being something, then clearly it is actually an act of taking common sense away and placing/forcing that supposed “good.”
This is no different when I tell a story about myself, instead of directing myself in common sense of what is actually here.
Try becoming silent around people, and they will begin to validate themselves through incessant talking; and then try to change the topic, and -as the program has started -more than likely this will cause an upset, like the interruption of a tv show. And probably, any thing said in response by another person, is really a commercial in preparation as the commercial enterprise of the person responding. lol
In this case, the one who built and controls the judges bench, is the one who gets the their supposed imposed “good” to veil common sense. We are all allowing the validation of a collection of rules and laws that are protection/defense mechanisms that speak of themselves as good, as this must be imposed - so obvious in the NEED to substantiate this supposed “goodness”- because obviously “good” does not exist on this earth, this “good” imposition is touting itself as common sense, but the very need to “tout” belies the act. Common sense is common sense, with investigation and actual “here” seeing what is best is best for ALL. And that “ best for all” more than likely will not a dividend make. So, self validation divides and ends common sense, as it is the screaming of self interested justification. This is the character that must exist in a system of survival, as profit, this is the cry of survival in loss of common sense.
Yes, we are allowing a system that is really destructive and not supportive of life in any way. And it has to stop. The first step, is an equal money system, to organize a structure that supports life, so that we as life, can develop what we are as life in common sense.
I could never understand why my older sister held herself at a distance from myself and my sisters. One day, as a teenager I found a note book of hers. I opened it to a page, because I didn’t know what it was. I read a few lines and shut the book. It was a litany of how much my older sister hated her other sisters. I was not surprised, but seeing the words validated what I had “sensed” from her, yet was not supposed to believe as it was a “bad/negative” thought and that would not make me a proper “lady” so to speak.
I had come to the conclusion, that my sister was really just angry because she had lost her “special” place because my sister’s and I had been born. My older sister was missing her place as the ONLY one, as the one who got all the attention.
Here I am, 50 years old, and I read this in a blog of self forgiveness. Which means, if I have this realization somewhere, that many, many people have had this same common sense realization about the behaviors of people. This means that we all fucking know this. There is no excuse within this, that we don’t look at why this exists and wake up and look at what is here and figure this out and sort this world out. That behavior of my sister was horrible, and pointless and useless, for her and for me, for all of us. How was this what was given? Why was not, my sister as common sense as life, not what was developed?
My youngest sister had a princess status, as she was the last and a single child- I was a twin- until well into her teens. She will talk to no one in the family, and when she does she becomes hysterical, blaming all of us for not knowing how to LOVE her, that we are all to blame for her problems because we do not know how to love ( and yes, I hope she reads this- she has said that if I call her, she will call the police on me….yes).
In a way she is correct, we do not know how to “give as one would like to receive” as we are doing the same thing she is doing, wanting to revalidate our princess status, our feel good “ I am special” tonality as what we first experienced in life as small children. We can understand that we are doing this, but can we realize the beingness of ourselves as this and clean this up? Can we realize how much we have become this, and how separate we are physically from a development of ourselves within common sense? We cannot read this world, this physical world, we have no trust physically of our own common sense of this world. And the dictates surrounding us through media, individual social expression as reverberation of this very same dictate, the educational system etc., are all doing the same. Just as the judge on that bench talking about how this system - ironically composed of corporations that are now legally “individuals” - is wonderful. The media is the voice of corporations wanting to be “special” and good, ignoring the effects of this so obvious in the existential abuse on earth happening all around us every minute. All of this, separate from common sense of what is actually here, and all of it an imposed energetic storm of “feel good” being simply “touted” validation, which as I said above- is separate from common sense, as the need to do this, is the need to do this, and thus not life existing in and as common sense of what is real.
This is so freaking obvious, and thus it is so obvious that we collectively have to stand up and change this system and learn to exist in common sense of life, which we have never done.
My younger sister’s resonant princess status is so thick because it went on for so long, she has one giant fucking carrot in front of this donkey behavior she has no idea how to remove as she knows (knw=ows, okay I wrote this word by supposed mistake - but it is like a “knowledge that creates ows- like a pain!) nothing else as she does not know what she is as a “sound” divided and conquered by a “feel good” energy as this energy as self is the separation from self as life in common sense of life as what she is and we all are.
There is no one to blame in all this, there is only sorting this all out, self forgiving this, and stopping.
I was talking to a neighbor about this, and they understood and agreed and then went on to validate themselves by telling me their story - their memories.
But i am the same, I believe my story and memories are justified. To realize how much I am this very same action, takes some time to acknowledge and then clean up. And that self as that story, really resists its end, it has been going on for so long. It is like the television as mind, does not want to be turned off, all the things said and done through the years must be found out, these cobwebs of the mind, must be removed and realigned piece by piece. We each allowed this, so we each are responsible to clean this up, and anyway, no one else can “get into your closet as your mind” and clean this up. You, Humpty Dumpty, are the only one who can piece yourself back together again. To NOT do this, is to continue what has been allowed, and thus is to continue the abuse existent on earth, as what must be done, is to develop common sense in and as life, here, as what we all are, one and equal, as what supports us, as this is the gift, and stand as life, in common sense as life, here.
This “mind” fairy tale self is like the “f” in the word “fairy”, the “f” being a self bound to a cross ( as quantum mind), where the turn on the top of the “t” in the shape of the “f” is how you exist as a bowed head, in self abdication as life, to the fantasy “airs” as manners in separation from common sense of self as life.
Even our pictographs tell us what we are. The truth is always right in front of us, thus we need no judges on benches telling us what we are, and thus, is the very act of this telling, a signifier of the absence of common sense development.
Even those born in a situation where they were told they were “bad” from the beginning are of this belief, in and as energy, and are just as much in separation from common sense of self as life, as the ones born into a “princess/prince” energetic existence as belief, opinion and idea.
I know so many families that have an “estranged” sibling. It is a pattern that exists within my world, as I am sure it is the same in many many families. And it is the same story told again and again, and yet we are all caught up in our own emotions and feelings, that our relationship is to our own stories/emotions/feelings - that have become so HUGE- we cannot see that this is a pattern, and these emotions, thoughts and feelings are so loud, we do not “know” as what is resonant within us, anything else. And to, as I have said before, to stop this and step outside of this will feel like major resistance because this is what we have become, and this being as what we are, does not want to die- and it is not real, it is a fantasy in the mind.
Would such an existential state make communication flow between people? Is there real communication between people on this earth? Are your relationships equitable and without conflict, misunderstanding?
We know they are not: as least we have this little tiny tiny bit of common sense left. Is death the point where even this little tiny bit of common sense is gone? Is this the point where the fairy tale has consumed all of self so that all self is is this fantasy in separation from common sense of self as life?
It is time to understand self as mind. Join Desteni, listen to the Eqafe self perfection products. Realize that what exists, a profit based system - as what has been allowed- requires money to exist. Realize that suggesting “giving as one would like to receive” within this present accepted and allowed system does not exist. The very structure of this profit based system must change to become a system of equality that realizes the value is life.
And naturally, a profit based system is going to tout beliefs in all ways possible to keep telling it’s story, and it is not going to want to die. Creating religion and suggesting behaviors that are acts that make a “holier than thou” character end up placing that character on the street, or on a cross, into death where no effective change can happen. It is to not bite the hand that rocks the cradle, but to become the hand that rocks the cradle - of life that is earth as the humans, to birth life into and as the cradle in common sense of life, as this is the value.
Let’s begin with a structural system of equality as an Equal Money System.
Self Validation
Every moment I start talking about myself, I am in essence validating myself, as I have to describe, verbally to another what I am, which is in essence not allowing that person to actually see what I am, and instead I am dictating what I am. And most of the time, not wanting anyone else to talk, just so I can get all my words in as what I am wanting to be told. Makes me think of judges on benches. I had jury duty, and the “judge” gave a lecture at the end to the ones who were not placed through the lottery onto the jury, and gave a speech about how import the service was, and how the ones NOT chosen had missed an opportunity. Meanwhile, there were policemen in the room and no one in the crowd was allowed to talk. So the judge was talking about how wonderful is/was system - how successful- and how other countries are coming to America to learn the same model. Yet no one was allowed to speak up for or against this! And then he went on to talk about how wonderful democracy is. Meanwhile, the whole picture and interaction is the opposite of democracy. No one is allowed to talk, to raise their hand and speak, all that is actually physically taking place is a dictation from a bench on high talking about how wonderful this situation is.
I won’t go into the amount of abuse existent on earth at this moment, that is real, the point here is that a judge sitting on a bench TELLING me that this system is wonderful and not allowing any other voice, does not make this system wonderful when in actuality there is enough evidence that it is NOT. But then again, the need for the policement in the room, and the need for silence from anything other than the voice on the pedestal on the bench is a VERY CLEAR indication - of a structure and force of denial and suppression in self interest, that no words saying it is good can deny.
Which reveals that if something needs to say it is good, needs to validate itself as being something, then clearly it is actually an act of taking common sense away and placing/forcing that supposed “good.”
This is no different when I tell a story about myself, instead of directing myself in common sense of what is actually here.
Try becoming silent around people, and they will begin to validate themselves through incessant talking; and then try to change the topic, and -as the program has started -more than likely this will cause an upset, like the interruption of a tv show. And probably, any thing said in response by another person, is really a commercial in preparation as the commercial enterprise of the person responding. lol
In this case, the one who built and controls the judges bench, is the one who gets the their supposed imposed “good” to veil common sense. We are all allowing the validation of a collection of rules and laws that are protection/defense mechanisms that speak of themselves as good, as this must be imposed - so obvious in the NEED to substantiate this supposed “goodness”- because obviously “good” does not exist on this earth, this “good” imposition is touting itself as common sense, but the very need to “tout” belies the act. Common sense is common sense, with investigation and actual “here” seeing what is best is best for ALL. And that “ best for all” more than likely will not a dividend make. So, self validation divides and ends common sense, as it is the screaming of self interested justification. This is the character that must exist in a system of survival, as profit, this is the cry of survival in loss of common sense.
Yes, we are allowing a system that is really destructive and not supportive of life in any way. And it has to stop. The first step, is an equal money system, to organize a structure that supports life, so that we as life, can develop what we are as life in common sense.
I could never understand why my older sister held herself at a distance from myself and my sisters. One day, as a teenager I found a note book of hers. I opened it to a page, because I didn’t know what it was. I read a few lines and shut the book. It was a litany of how much my older sister hated her other sisters. I was not surprised, but seeing the words validated what I had “sensed” from her, yet was not supposed to believe as it was a “bad/negative” thought and that would not make me a proper “lady” so to speak.
I had come to the conclusion, that my sister was really just angry because she had lost her “special” place because my sister’s and I had been born. My older sister was missing her place as the ONLY one, as the one who got all the attention.
Here I am, 50 years old, and I read this in a blog of self forgiveness. Which means, if I have this realization somewhere, that many, many people have had this same common sense realization about the behaviors of people. This means that we all fucking know this. There is no excuse within this, that we don’t look at why this exists and wake up and look at what is here and figure this out and sort this world out. That behavior of my sister was horrible, and pointless and useless, for her and for me, for all of us. How was this what was given? Why was not, my sister as common sense as life, not what was developed?
My youngest sister had a princess status, as she was the last and a single child- I was a twin- until well into her teens. She will talk to no one in the family, and when she does she becomes hysterical, blaming all of us for not knowing how to LOVE her, that we are all to blame for her problems because we do not know how to love ( and yes, I hope she reads this- she has said that if I call her, she will call the police on me….yes).
In a way she is correct, we do not know how to “give as one would like to receive” as we are doing the same thing she is doing, wanting to revalidate our princess status, our feel good “ I am special” tonality as what we first experienced in life as small children. We can understand that we are doing this, but can we realize the beingness of ourselves as this and clean this up? Can we realize how much we have become this, and how separate we are physically from a development of ourselves within common sense? We cannot read this world, this physical world, we have no trust physically of our own common sense of this world. And the dictates surrounding us through media, individual social expression as reverberation of this very same dictate, the educational system etc., are all doing the same. Just as the judge on that bench talking about how this system - ironically composed of corporations that are now legally “individuals” - is wonderful. The media is the voice of corporations wanting to be “special” and good, ignoring the effects of this so obvious in the existential abuse on earth happening all around us every minute. All of this, separate from common sense of what is actually here, and all of it an imposed energetic storm of “feel good” being simply “touted” validation, which as I said above- is separate from common sense, as the need to do this, is the need to do this, and thus not life existing in and as common sense of what is real.
This is so freaking obvious, and thus it is so obvious that we collectively have to stand up and change this system and learn to exist in common sense of life, which we have never done.
My younger sister’s resonant princess status is so thick because it went on for so long, she has one giant fucking carrot in front of this donkey behavior she has no idea how to remove as she knows (knw=ows, okay I wrote this word by supposed mistake - but it is like a “knowledge that creates ows- like a pain!) nothing else as she does not know what she is as a “sound” divided and conquered by a “feel good” energy as this energy as self is the separation from self as life in common sense of life as what she is and we all are.
There is no one to blame in all this, there is only sorting this all out, self forgiving this, and stopping.
I was talking to a neighbor about this, and they understood and agreed and then went on to validate themselves by telling me their story - their memories.
But i am the same, I believe my story and memories are justified. To realize how much I am this very same action, takes some time to acknowledge and then clean up. And that self as that story, really resists its end, it has been going on for so long. It is like the television as mind, does not want to be turned off, all the things said and done through the years must be found out, these cobwebs of the mind, must be removed and realigned piece by piece. We each allowed this, so we each are responsible to clean this up, and anyway, no one else can “get into your closet as your mind” and clean this up. You, Humpty Dumpty, are the only one who can piece yourself back together again. To NOT do this, is to continue what has been allowed, and thus is to continue the abuse existent on earth, as what must be done, is to develop common sense in and as life, here, as what we all are, one and equal, as what supports us, as this is the gift, and stand as life, in common sense as life, here.
This “mind” fairy tale self is like the “f” in the word “fairy”, the “f” being a self bound to a cross ( as quantum mind), where the turn on the top of the “t” in the shape of the “f” is how you exist as a bowed head, in self abdication as life, to the fantasy “airs” as manners in separation from common sense of self as life.
Even our pictographs tell us what we are. The truth is always right in front of us, thus we need no judges on benches telling us what we are, and thus, is the very act of this telling, a signifier of the absence of common sense development.
Even those born in a situation where they were told they were “bad” from the beginning are of this belief, in and as energy, and are just as much in separation from common sense of self as life, as the ones born into a “princess/prince” energetic existence as belief, opinion and idea.
I know so many families that have an “estranged” sibling. It is a pattern that exists within my world, as I am sure it is the same in many many families. And it is the same story told again and again, and yet we are all caught up in our own emotions and feelings, that our relationship is to our own stories/emotions/feelings - that have become so HUGE- we cannot see that this is a pattern, and these emotions, thoughts and feelings are so loud, we do not “know” as what is resonant within us, anything else. And to, as I have said before, to stop this and step outside of this will feel like major resistance because this is what we have become, and this being as what we are, does not want to die- and it is not real, it is a fantasy in the mind.
Would such an existential state make communication flow between people? Is there real communication between people on this earth? Are your relationships equitable and without conflict, misunderstanding?
We know they are not: as least we have this little tiny tiny bit of common sense left. Is death the point where even this little tiny bit of common sense is gone? Is this the point where the fairy tale has consumed all of self so that all self is is this fantasy in separation from common sense of self as life?
It is time to understand self as mind. Join Desteni, listen to the Eqafe self perfection products. Realize that what exists, a profit based system - as what has been allowed- requires money to exist. Realize that suggesting “giving as one would like to receive” within this present accepted and allowed system does not exist. The very structure of this profit based system must change to become a system of equality that realizes the value is life.
And naturally, a profit based system is going to tout beliefs in all ways possible to keep telling it’s story, and it is not going to want to die. Creating religion and suggesting behaviors that are acts that make a “holier than thou” character end up placing that character on the street, or on a cross, into death where no effective change can happen. It is to not bite the hand that rocks the cradle, but to become the hand that rocks the cradle - of life that is earth as the humans, to birth life into and as the cradle in common sense of life, as this is the value.
Let’s begin with a structural system of equality as an Equal Money System.
Monday, September 3, 2012
Day !37 Is not heresay/heresy a sin?
Day 137 Is not heresay/heresy a sin?
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that the way in which we are taught is based on ideas, beliefs and opinions based on heresy, passed down through for-fathers and mothers, like a game of telephone, where the message becomes less than the original message in tandem with no actual self physical experience equal and one to what is real, this physical world.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I am a composition of heresy, as what i have been told I should exist as, as a presentation to fit into a system of inequality to survive within a system of profit that has failed as it is not supporting life.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I am resonant with story telling, as heresy/hearsay, and thus have never been taught to actually work one and equal to and as what is here as the substance of life that is one and equal as what we/I are/am as life here, with out the “say” as the only experience with what is here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I was forced to accept this, as a child, where the consequences of not accepting this meant punishment, as the heresay had become all that was known, becoming what was believed to be real, instead of actual physical interaction with this physical world.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I fear death, as I fear time running out, where I know I am a walking heresay, trying to utilize this heresay to express myself and survive, yet this here-say has no substance, and the here-say as itself only want a match to support itself as its persona of story/character construction in separation from what is real, actual, physical here, where what has been made huge is the telling of the heresy/heresay/hearsay and not the actual common sense of my self as a human physical body, that which is real or sex would not be such a huge drive in men, as this has also been clouded with heresy as image as idea, as picture porn show in separation of physical common sense as life, like the way in which animals just simply enjoy themselves physically.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that as long as I allow this to direct me, my life will have no substantive expression as life.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I fear rejection in becoming here without the say, as the say, as belief, opinion and idea, takes care of the act of myself as life and not the here, as is so evident within the present system of capitalism as profit, as a division and conquer of what support a few in existential heresay/hearsay/heresy physical comfort, and not the life substance, the actual physical world, as what is real, as what is the value, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel sad that this exists, that what is so obvious is ignored.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that more than likely, it will be impossible for life to be birthed into, as what it already is, this physical world, as the heresy has become so huge it has consumed the human, and thus is the human merely a parasite on existence, which is laughable because the human believes itself to be superior to nature, when it is in fact the exact opposite.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that to clear myself of this heresy I must stop and slow myself down and breath, and apply common sense of this physical world to all the hearsay / heresy that I have accepted and allowed in separation from myself as life as my human physical body in common sense with what is actually physically here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that there is really no hope for man kind, as mankind has become so ignorant of this physical reality that he is indeed what he makes movies about, a walking zombie whose only action is that of destruction, where at least this walking zombie kills itself and the birds and the bees seem to keep going in the background.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel angry about this, and sad.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that my heresy self seeks attention, that my heresy self seeks validation, that my heresy self exists only within relationships to other walking zombies of heresy.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel sad about all of this, as this sadness is a judgement, and not myself here, as being this judgement despite the odds will do nothing to change these odds, as all there is is to walk one and equal to this physical world.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I feel like I have been kicking and screaming in and as myself for so long, that I have been trying to scratch my way out of a coffin, that I fear never being able to get out of this coffin whose form and design I cannot fathom, or believed I could not fathom, and I fear the very constrictions I have accepted and allowed, that just as i drive in my car and fear having an accident, where it feels like I feel that I cannot see, I cannot hear, I will not see what is coming towards me from the other lane.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that all I can be is here, where within common sense I am here, and not as some emotion, thought or feeling based on belief, opinion and idea composing an alternate reality picture of fear of loss superimposed on what is freely giving here as this earth, manifest as a profit based system ( I wrote eyetem!) that places monetary value on (eye) items instead of supporting what is actually physically here as the value as life.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that instead of moving automatically here, with what is real, I have accepted and allowed a persona/character to develop equal and one to itemized values of property signifying ownership and thus survival, where the schmuck possession is the survival eyetem totem of worship and not the substance of what is freely given here as life, one and equal to myself here, expressing itself as life, this that has been told to man, to not worship as a false god, as no totems are needed, as what is here is the real say/expression as life, the physical.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting a supernatural coffin of energy as directive creating uncertainty and fear to exist, as this supernatural directive has no value or substance.
I commit myself to slowing down, to breathing here, to taking in what is here as one and equal to me, and within this supporting what is here, where any reaction energetically , as emotionally or within feeling, as compounded thought to what is here is a judgment and a fear of loss, a fear of survival.
I commit myself to letting go of characters of blame, and shame, to a persona of ideas that support a limited idea if what it is that I am, where , yes I am a woman, and a human, and as this my responsibility is to include all that is here manifest on this earth, where i cannot judge any form of what is here, as this is a composition of life, and it is only myself within a limited resonant design that disallows equal consideration for all that is here, through the placement of value judgments on property instead of what is the composition of said property, which is life, one and equal in and as all forms within this existence.
I commit myself to no longer commit to a system of separation through aggrandizement of what can be conquered and divided to allow a few to control eyetems for self interested survival, as this requires separation from life in expression here.
I commit myself to directing myself in common sense of my equality to and as life here, realizing that moving within and as fear is simply a lack of communication and understanding of life in totality, that the only choice is to breath and move within common sense directing within and as this within the principle of equality and oneness.
I commit myself to remaining in and as breath, to hear, to see, to sense what is physically here, to hear here, and forgive the say, as the dictate of a belief of a system that has not supported life, and has in fact failed to support life, evident in the rampart of abuse as the pyramid of separation of an imposed hierarchy of more than and less than called capitalism, or any centralized regime as all have been ignorant of life support as what has existed is within the say of self survival interest.
I commit myself to physically feel what is physically here and to no longer fear myself as life, to bring all of myself here as life, forgiving the say of eyetem value as self definition.
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