What SPELLS have I cast, what SPELLS has Hillary Clinton cast? Day 716

Within playing the violin, I had to be aware of the muscles in my body because if they tensed, that tension built and then I was occupied in sorting that out and lost focus on what kept my place in the music, which was moving in those around me. 

At the moment, I am aware of energy moving in me. There appears to me to be a lot. Yet, someone reminded me that the energy is really very very small. It only appears huge. This is cool from one perspective because it reveals how by nature of our self as life, our presence, we can narrow our focus down to the smallest of things, and we can sense the whole of what is around us as well.  The energy within me , is where I accepted and allowed myself to focus for an extended period of time, on ideas, beliefs and opinions, that I did not resolve and balance back into reality, as all things, which includes the manifestation of form as the physical.  

What I notice is how much I have thoughts falling down into my body. Instead of myself cross-referencing what is here, I am projecting value judgements based on what I practiced as an abstract idea,  down from my head into my body. It is like this thick soup, heavy, dark, like a tar falling from within me.  It moves into various parts of the body, even into my chest.  There it resists addressing this very same thing in others, such an occupation of myself that problem solving because secondary to protection . 

I have a fear of people, which is related to another fear I have, as a paranoia of the paranormal. This, built in childhood, most probably because my parents were the same as me, as they absorbed this mis-take on reality from their parents, because that is the nature of life, to sense all things. This leads to realizing that the only thing to choose is that which does no harm, or, the choice is to move within what transforms in ways that do no harm- otherwise how does one learn how to create?  This is why my words must relate to this physical world directly. Each measure as each word, must trigger a relationship, as a respect of, what is here manifest as the physical.  This is living in consideration of all things. Within this, I would have no alternate reality of value judgements less than life, heavy, within and as me; this energy falling and moving around within me, that I accepted and allowed.

Just as in playing the violin, no one can do this for you but yourself, it does not matter who you absorbed that lead to this mis-take in reality as being the cry of why this has happened. This is not living solution; instead, in complaining one is that which one is being when one blames another, that other that has to do the same- no matter what.  Also, playing the violin, as an analogy here, means that one cannot understand until one is that capacity. In this world this means knowing one’s words and aligning them to reality. Then, to process this information with ease, to catch up to what has been a mis-take within and as one’s self, to see the patterns, to realize the movement, of which I am sure I have more to discover, as some are so subtle, within my own habit of resistance to life, that lead to a resistance to change, that lead to me separating myself from physical reality. 

As some may know, my husband committed suicide. I remember a time when I could see this coming, and a day, specifically, where I stood there in the hallway of our apartment at the time, and said to myself, “ what is it about he words” as I attempted to sort out what I could sense coming. Also, as I stood in front of a fourth grade class, and realized that the children were all over the place in their focus ability, and that all I could do is rebuild, just as I did when I taught the violin. It meant moving into the smallest measures and practicing them until they were stable, so that the presence of the person could expand to greater awareness of the space around them, or the information within an equal relationship to the space around them.  Those who know destini is related to Bernard Poolman must realize that what he did, as he was a stuck in his mind as the rest of us, that he had to process the information in this reality as words, to begin to see the patterns of the present system, and his own patterns of belief, to assess why there was so much destruction and not enough creation on this planet called earth. 

I can say, from the point of my own experience up until now, that realizing the energy moving within me, took time, and has more development towards realizing this. From the perspective of having and being within this, that energy appears to be so real, and so huge, that a perspective from within that, will believe, as in the will having accepted this, that that energy is real and all that is when it is not.   It is to say, that if you do not see the grass growing then you are not here, you as have I, rejected what is real, the physical world, for a false construct of ideas that is an entity within you. I cannot remember yesterday because I was not there, I was instead in a construct of information, limited and by such nature stagnant, within and as me, as energy.  Therefor, I have no real constancy, as life, because I was not in attention to life, as the physical.  I accepted a polarized story of information, that layered within and as me, becoming a personality of likes and dislikes, and believing that I had wants needs and desires that made me unique and special, when what was special, or is special is being life, being here, creating and living. 

In all, one has to get one’s processing speed up, one has to see, realize and understand that SPELL within and it manifestation as a world system that is not aligned with respect of all things, as the physical world, which is creation, which is the means of ourselves being in expression as life here. One has to catch up, so to speak, to the spin of energy, composed of ideas, beliefs and opinions , which means one must process the words as their spin holding the system in place AND as the constructs of value judgements within one’s self.  One could say that this started with religion, those first tech buildings filled with song and colored windows. One could say this started with agriculture, creating imagery, as icons of objects from nature, giving them a meaning within one’s self that was just this, a value within in separation from the real physical thing.  Thus, here we are, on earth, perhaps the last bastion of somewhat functioning physical creation, compounded down to a single point as this is all that is left from a race who idolize what is within without respect towards creation.   A respect and care towards all things is the only choice, as this is the real nature of life. It is the innate capacity of each of us. It is who and what we are as life. 

In all, I must realize my own SPELLS, to bring myself back to who and what I am as life, to stand, equal and one in respect of physical reality, as this is creation information.  If I cannot process the information as the spells, as my word relationship within energy/value judgements , then how will I realize my own accepted and allowed legerdemain that is an inferiority to life as that which is who and what I am that is my own separation from being present and equal to the will of and as me as life, here. 

Am I SPELLING courage or am I spelling chaos, as limitation and stagnation are a form of chaos filled with  projecting and imagining blame and worst case scenarios, gloom and doom, fear and reaction instead of problem solving.  Have I managed to move information, as the spells of men, to such a degree that I begin to see the patterns of my own accepted and allowed separation into limitation and by form, stagnation into a consequence of an energetic reaction  called value judgements that in space is so small yet made so huge, that an idea of that inform that I have accepted and allowed appears to be real, yet is not?  What am I spelling with this gift of life that is me? 

I mean have a look, Hillary Clinton evidently has Parkinson's dis-EASE,  how was that lack of ease, that lack of being present, created? From what was this limitation and physical stagnation built? As yourself, can you hear the grass growing, are you playing the instrument of you as life, or are you caught in a dream called energy? I would suggest increasing your processing of the spells speed, and self forgive this limitation that is a separation from life. It is stagnant - visible in a fear of change.  Would you want this for yourself, do you want this for this children to come? 

Day 592 Real Cyber Attacks are the Presentational Use of False Dilemmas

I realized in the years that I practiced an instrument that any and all emotional values I allowed during my focus within the act of practicing remained. I had to be clear, I had to have a focus that was what I would call total.

We as physical instruments are exactly the same, how we are within remains with us and must be cleared or it becomes a distraction from being present.

I also realize that as a child, being with parents that did not realize this and how emotional feeling bodies as polarized ideas about something, creating false dilemmas taking one quality or value about something and suggesting that one was good and another was bad, created a lag in perception because a threat of an either or scenario was created in separation from practical, physical reality. So, this judgement, because this is what this in essence is, remains as a self definition and it is like a cloudy focus that then is laid upon reality, causing a disconnect, which causes mis-steps, which causes an inequality to reality. 

Then one’s actions in reality lack clear direction and one ends up not seeing the height of that step up to that door, for example. One has become a bubble of separation, and that bubble is composed of energy, a lesser substance, that is yet heavier than the substance of the life around us.

As a child, was my common sense, a natural sense, not substantiated? Was it that because of the accumulation of separation and consequential energy personifications recited as the words only, that which was a value that supported a framework that was another layer of consequence because of that initial separation of value judgment no longer regarding the practical physical manifestation of life? Am I the product of the “ sins of the fathers” genetically and in accepting and allowing a dampening of an innate common sense because that common sense was not given opportunity to substantiate qualities for what they were without an added value of being made less through simple ignorance?
Would such end up as an idea that one was not good enough, when that “ good enough” was built of lack of substantiation only, which has nothing to do with “ good enough”?
And thus a false dilemma has been accepted and allowed. The problem is that  this emotional state creates a lag in acting responsibly to reality. It ends up being carried with one, and every time one “ plays” as self as life as an instrument of life, that “ film” remains as idea. Then, this projection, just like a TV, sources the very substance of the physical, and ends up diminishing the physical until one dies. It is a death of slow fading, and not a birth, a b-earthing of oneself equal and one to creation. It is not one sounding life, it is one sounding - so to speak- energy. It is why one’s legs become heavy, it is why one’s back becomes inflexible. These are all indications of the degree to which one has accepted emotional/feeling lags, as I call them in this moment, that are built of  calling one value a good and another a bad and comparing the two to suggest a “ what if” or “ supposed threat” , because in practical reality a cup is a cup and it exists here.

The physical world, and the qualities of this, as the words humans use to communicate , is the perfect check list to order ourselves here, practically, to earth ourselves as life.

I watched a speech by Obama on a major news channel yesterday. It was about a “ cyber attack” and whether people should go to the movies. I thought, how does going to the movies have anything to do with a cyber attack? Why are these two things impulsed in one moment? One is getting in a car and driving to a theater and the other is being online. This demands some real “ stretch of the imagination.”  What is the agenda here, on this that had no section I could readily see to make any kind of comment - another red flag in our modern age of communication? Within this scenario, this in itself is a one way fits all movement, take in the false dilemma and shut up. I thought we had bully laws in place. Or is this the law of the debtors on the ground, the law of the liability carriers as the collective that just take it all without question which means we cannot blame anyone but ourselves? 

So, now one can drive to the theater, with a threat of cyber attack as one drives, distracting oneself from answering that child’s question about why there is a dog out in the cold looking awfully skinny, to which an answer is provided that dismisses why that dog is there instead of investigating and substantiating to the child what the child senses is a reality that has some discrepancies that make no sense. And that child becomes less than that moment of common sense wanting license. And that common sense is what will lead to the full potential of that child if it is allowed substantiation. This is the real dilemma, do we choose to give that life as that child their full potential, or do we continue to allow a media that uses false dilemmas to distract our equality to a common sense of reality?

Can we not see how the valley of good and evil is all in our heads and the means now used by media via false dilemmas,  is what we are allowing within and has accumulated into a system that overall destroys the full potential of our children as a natural common sense is denied through ignorance, of which each of us was at one time? Is it not time to change our system to one that allows each the time and space to ensure that that potential as life in our children reaches its full capacity as this is what we would want for ourselves?

We must begin to realize the tactics of good and bad judgements and take the parts and align them into practical reality, to remove the emotional lags, and walk steadily back into our common sense. We can no longer be confused by the warping of reality, strings of gloom and doom,  fear tactics distorting reality. And we must realize that we have allowed a system that uses this, and that has a financial structure that leads our boys into combat, discarding them when no longer needed. But, we allowed ourselves to get caught in the dream of becoming something, as being a man, or woman, through armed force, a force that has no real alignment to our innate common sense, and a force that creates a arm of destruction towards others and eventually with self. This is not what we want for our children or ourselves, thus it is time to stop, to stand, and as all arms as life as our human physical bodies, must stand as one, to build a system that is equal to life, which is to give what one needs to live a life of dignity. In practice, in policy, this is a Living Income Guarantee.  Become responsible as life, substantiate yourself as life, arm yourself with the principle of what is best for all, because this is what is best for self. 

Day 435 Are you an automaton or are you here aware of the whole?

I remember correcting state writing tests for a school district of seventh graders. So, I sat at a table and corrected the writing of many seventh graders for a couple of days. The words passed by me all day.

Within this there were many forms placed on the paper by each child in this grade level. There was one group of essays that had a pattern, that pattern became obvious because it had more structure than the other papers. A teacher had really taken the time and practiced with the children a simple essay format: the opening statement and the supporting details. The body of the paper fleshing out each point in the opening paragraph. So, the opening paragraph was a perspective given.

Within this, it was easy to see which children could plug in a perspective and support and then flesh this out. There were degrees of difference within this spanning the whole gamut of the stages of development.

Usually, the papers that filled the structure with words I found cool because they completed the order. But when I compared them to what was being said within other papers where there was incomplete order as in building the from of the essay to completion was the perspectives given.

Some of the children built “ thin” statements but completed the template, meaning they had words to place in the form, but the perspective was not encompassing, meaning it did not engage me, it was a common perspective. There is nothing wrong with this, especially at this level because the child is learning to build within a proscribed form, so to take what is known and to use it is fine within learning a new form.

Some children stopped after the topic sentence, moving beyond this was difficult for them. And since this is a process, obviously these children need more support within getting beyond inhibition, getting beyond being overwhelmed with this task. 

Then there were children that could write a topic sentence that was an eye-opening perspective. So “ new “ to me I was astounded. Just reading that first line, the words was like a “ whole new world” so to speak. And often these children had a hard time fleshing this out. This varied by degree too. Some could not move beyond that first paragraph, some had very weak supporting paragraphs.

It was interesting that the papers that were given an ‘A” because they fulfilled the volume of a learned order as a form as the essay, often did not say anything new, even the information was following an established perspective. These papers were praised, not only for their completed form but for the perspective given. Had these children simply learned the perspective as well as the use of words and the conceptual ability to hold a form that orders? What was it about these children that gave perspective that was refreshing but not carried through placed into the structure. Is this that the child that had completed the paper had the time to practice their perspective and thus have easy feed back because the perspective was a norm? Had those children with perspectives that were like a window was being opened, not been allowed to flesh out their perspectives in real life, in ordinary talking, interacting life? Were they stagnant through dis-allowance of their very way of seeing the world in expression on a day to day basis. Had they ever been listened to, and thus practice building their perspective. Or, was their perspective not really heard because it was by degree an  encompassing insight that did not fit the proscription of the norm, and thus even teachers could not conceptually move and direct within this with ease, nor parents and thus the child had no practice, no follow through with their sight about the world?

If that “A” paper is of an accepted order, not good or bad, but conditioned, and all the adults follow this as a norm, and this becomes automated, like a metaphysical guidance system, would it not be difficult to recognize other perspectives? Because in essence what I am saying is that perceptually most of us follow a proscribed order, the one taught to such an extent that conceptually moving out of this is not a movement within us done with ease. A few can do this, but this few are very few, most of us are egotistical and want our perspective to be the only one, not realizing that there is value in our perspective but it is not the only way to see. Thus we are so busy doing this, or following the proscribed order just to get through the day, because we have some worry on our minds, that when a child comes with a new perspective, we cannot see it, because we are automated within a limited view, we are essentially stagnant, and this has become a habit. This in itself is a crime, because it is a state that does not see beyond limited prescription, and thus that child’s voice, that child’s eye opening perspective, is not listened to. Now, what does this eventually do to that child? Do they ever have the chance to build on their perspective? No. Would they become confused and withdrawn. Yes. Would they have ever practiced moving their perspective through to completion, have the practice to follow through. No. Would they become frustrated and withdrawn and eventually seek something to ease that expression that has not been allowed to be released in other ways? Would they by the time they get to middle school have developed habits of giving up? Just as those who follow the proscription develop habits of not seeing anything else other than that proscription that gets the “A” because it is the norm and touted enough and accepted enough within interaction that its practice is available? In both scenarios, we see where we become automated. Thus knowing we become automated, it is obvious that we stop using our conceptual ability, and this act is a crime against the development of ourselves and our children. It is unacceptable. And it means that each needs to make an effort to self realize our own levels of automation. And it also means that we have to be very careful of what we teach because what we teach will become automated to some degree, unless we realize we become this and remain aware of this as we face the world. A human living in automation is a human who has rejected conceptual ability, is a stagnant human, and as we can see with our children, an abuse to the very voice of that child and probably those with whom we have relationships with.

Now, there is this boy who I see walking up and down my street almost every day.  A good looking boy, had a job, must have been in his twenties. Quiet, polite. His hair was always in his eyes, his clothes put together. There was never conversation between us, except for the occasional greeting when my dog happened to run up to him.

This summer this boy died from an overdose. I had to ask myself what lead to this young man being responsible, and yet incommunicative with the general society choosing to basically commit suicide in taking drugs that I am sure he understood to cause himself harm. Was it that this boy never had the opportunity to really speak, to really express his perspective? Was his silence because he had spoken up for years as a child, to teachers and parents and society that moved as an automated limited perspective that never answered/responded/looked at what he was saying, his speaking really a gift as it was an inclusive perspective about life, yet because it did not match what is really extremely limited perspectives taught in a classroom where knowledge and information is imparted but never practically lived thus never substantiated thus this formation in itself not allowing any other perspective to be discovered because it is only presentation as idea? And if we become automated, we begin to believe that this is the only perspective, despite our full awareness , if we read the news, that this physical world is not taking care of this earth, thus our perspectives are limited and do not answer to this physical world, and that child, that boy, perhaps her had a perspective that was a piece of what was missing in our automated understanding, a perspective that would open up our conceptual understanding of this world, to such an extent that the abuse going on in this world would diminish simply by adding the perspective of this human, this man, this child, this expression of life, this piece of earth, this being that is here and thus a support for the whole, as in all actuality, creation would only form a structure as that which supports it. Thus, it is only the blueprint created by the human on top of physical reality that is the problem. It is limited and thus in its limitation destructive, and the self direction from this blueprint without the use of the common sense that built this blueprint in every breath, creates a destructive automaton that destroys through dis-allowance of the voice of ALL of our children.

And we wonder why there are so many behavioral problems in middle school. Perhaps it is simply that it is impossible for these children to fit into such a limited design.

Go and try to correct a large group of  seventh grade papers, and see if you move as judgement within an automated proscription or if you can manage to see the whole,  to see that something is seriously limiting expression within these children. Many of whom have a voice that is astounding, but not allowed practice and development just because it does not fit into a limited prescription.  Try and see/realize your own automation and thus lack of common sense use, this that enables a more inclusive conceptual ability, this being seeing the movement and the form, the process and the outcome, all while remaining aware of the movement and formation of the actual real physical world, in being able to perceptually move within different perspectives, not being afraid to leave the automation behind. Look to your own negative statements of reprimand and your automation self supporting statement of positive reinforcement, caught in this one is not seeing what is here for what it is but flowing a prescription of limited awareness, a detriment to our children, those who by their very voice, have no voice and thus choose what is given, a death of themselves simply because they do not fit a limited set of knowledge and information given without physical experience, the perfect medium to diminish life and only allow that which serves a lesser god of profit before life, this giving what supports life in abundance to a few instead of valuing all life as being the gift, as being what would be supportive of this physical world.

So, the question. Are you an automaton or are you life? If you really look at yourself, more than likely you will realize how much of an automaton you really are.

There are solutions to this at a very basic practical level, to get us away from being automatic as a response. This is changing the system to one that allows change within implementing what allows more perspective in this world and thus more consideration and thus more common sense, more conception that is equal to the without as the world in totality. This is a Living Income Guarantee. This ends the limited viewpoint that some are more than others, and would allow more perspective voice and thus more children the ability to practice their uniqueness, which in essence  are the real gifts, we need only accept them as they allow us, each of us to expand our conceptual ability in becoming equal and one to and as life, here on earth, this cutting edge of creation that is simply the joy of being. Anything else is a crime. That is common sense.

Day 310 Suicides of our soldiers, the pawns of greed.

The Problem;
A major disconnect from reality within the existent system, which means it is time to change the system to one that supports life, as the following information clearly indicates that what we are accepting and allowing does not in fact support life.

25 disturbing facts about psych drugs, soldiers and suicides

by Mike Adams

We are living in an age of upside-downs, where right is wrong, fiction is truth and war is peace. Those who fight the wars are subjected to their own house of mirrors via pharmaceutical "treatments." Instead of providing U.S. soldiers and veterans with actual health care, the government throws pills at them and calls it "therapy."

Stimulants, antidepressants, anti-psychotics, sedatives and pain meds are the new "fuel" for America's front-line forces. While the idea of sending medicated soldiers into battle was unthinkable just three decades ago, today it's the status quo. And the cost in human lives has never been more tragic.

Here are 25 disturbing facts about psych drugs, soldiers and suicides. They are disturbing because everybody seems to be pretending there is no link between psychiatric drugs and soldier suicides. So soldiers and veterans keep dying while the Pentagon (and the VA) keep pretending they don't know why. (Sources are listed at the bottom of this article.)

1) 33% of the U.S. Army is on prescription medications, and nearly a quarter of those are on psychotropic drugs

2) In 2010, the Pentagon spent $280 million on psychiatric drugs. That number has since risen.

3) There are now over 8,000 suicides each year by U.S. soldiers and veterans; that's over 22 a day

4) 33% of those suicides are attributed to medication side effects

5) That means medications are killing more U.S. soldiers and veterans than Al-Qaeda

6) 500% more soldiers abuse prescription drugs than illegal street drugs

7) Under the Obama administration, the number of veterans waiting for VA care has risen from 11,000 in 2009 to 245,000 today

8) More active duty soldiers die from suicide than from combat: 349 dead last year

9) The number of prescriptions for Ritalin and Adderall written for active-duty soldiers has increased 1,000% in the last five years

10) For every active-duty service member who dies in battle, 25 veterans die by suicide

11) Only 1 percent of Americans have served in the Middle East, but veterans of combat there make up 20% of all suicides in the United States

12) The suicide rate of active-duty soldiers in the Civil War was only 9 - 15 per 100,000 soldiers. The suicide rate of active-duty U.S. soldiers in the Middle East is 23 per 100,000. And casualty rates were far higher in the Civil War, meaning the Civil War was more psychologically traumatic.

13) In the Korean War, the suicide rate among active-duty military soldiers was only 11 per 100,000

14) To date, the Pentagon has spent more than a billion dollars on psychiatric drugs, making it one of the largest customers of Big Pharma

15) In 2010, over 213,000 active-duty military personnel were taking medications considered "high risk" by the Pentagon

16) In the years since the Iraq War began, twice as many soldiers of the Texas Army National Guard have died of suicide than in combat

17) Defense Secretary Leon Panetta calls military suicides an "epidemic"

18) Of all the branches of the military, the Army has the highest number of suicides each year, almost 400% more than the Marines

19) Most active-duty soldiers who take psychiatric medications consume a combination of three to five prescriptions

20) The use of prescription medications by active-duty soldiers is largely unregulated. Soldiers are given a bottle of meds and sent into combat. If they run out of meds, they are given a refill, no questions asked.

21) The mainstream media says the answer to lowing suicides of veterans is to take away their guns so that they cannot shoot themselves. This is the logical equivalent to trying to fix your car's engine by removing the "check engine" light.

22) The Pentagon is initiating new research (in 2013) to try to figure out why psychiatric medications cause soldiers to commit suicide. The research involves tracking brain activity by attaching electrodes to the skull.

23) One-third of military suicides are committed by soldiers who have never seen combat

24) In the last year, the military wrote over 54,000 prescriptions for Seroquel to soldiers, and all those prescriptions were "off label," meaning the intended use has never been approved by the FDA as safe or effective.

25) Dr. Bart Billings, a retired Army Colonel and former military psychologist, refers to psychiatric drugs as a "chemical lobotomy" for soldiers.

Sources for this article (in order of appearance)

http://www.naturalnews.com/Infographic-Epidemic-Psychiatric-Drugging-...

http://www.toxicpsychiatry.com/storage/Military%20why%20are%20we%20dr...

What I find the most telling within the following article, to which I thank Mike Adams, is the amount of money made from the use of these detrimental drugs, of which our present system uses tax payer dollars to finance. Thus, we, the people, are allowing and accepting the finance of this suicide with the children of this country, to fight a war that is about resource control that is then owned privately without any improvement and often detriment for the peoples in the countries from which the resource is forcibly taken, and taken in such a way that the earth from which it is taken is rendered toxic and all of this with impunity.
I attend a town meeting in my small town. The committee denies responsibility for anything, always saying they have to follow the laws, and when questioned it is always the next committee in the line up of the process to get something done, that is responsible. And meanwhile, the primary statute in the state law is to ensure the common good of the people before profit, and that this law supersedes all subsequent laws, as the people can do what ever they want to ensure the common good. Somehow this “idea” is so abstract that it is unfathomable. To actually look at what is physically here and to realize within this direct connection to the earth and the physical existence and what is best for this, cannot be seen through all the laws and words and layers existent on paper, despite what is happening right here under our very eyes.
This means that the disconnect from reality is caused by each of us, which means that each suicide committed by a soldier is the fault of each of us, every American, because we are allowing this system to exist. The members of Congress have no connection to the abuse, and if anything are ensuring that they never will, as is seen by the growing dividebetween the have’s and the have not’s in America. And there are people out there who believe that that uneducated person is un-educated because they simply did not go to school, when they did not have the financial means to attend school, and the MO of the present educational system does not meet the learning ability of humans who are not able to memorize, and need a tangible way of learning about how things function, as not everyone can memorize endless amounts of data. And given this scenario, perhaps the ones who memorize so well, lack a connection with physical reality, as obviously, the ones who memorize and thus become the leaders in our society, have not in fact found solutionsthat allow support of life. Thus memory ability is not what creates a world where life is supported. Memory is walking data, with no connection to what is real, with no ability to actually see the effects of our actions onto the existent life on earth.
Thus the solution;
is a system that allows all life on earth to have basic needs met, which means an education that connects all on earth to life, to what supports life, which is this physical reality. Such a system is Equal Money Capitalism, to take what we have as a system that turns the value of resource to support life onto a piece of paper as money, and to share that money in such a way that all have access to what is needed to live, actually physically live in dignity. What we have allowed is unacceptable and must stop.

The rewards are the end of what is contained in this list above. It is the end of war, it is the end of suicide, it is the end of raping the earth with impunity, it is the end of starvationand poverty, child abuse, sexual abuse, animal abuse.
It is the end of entertainments broadcast all over the earth that consume attention away from our actions, to allow a few more than.
It is the end of what is obviously a very limited existence.
It is like we have built this spiders web, and we think that without this web we will fall, when it is the exact opposite, the web is the sum of all fears, the fears are the falling, and the seeming endlessness is the starting point of us all, is the eternal, and it is not what it seems, it is not something we are going to fall into, it is the starting point, and it is here from where we can, with and as the physical world, direct ourselves.

The rewards of equality, of realizing life as the value and thus supporting all life is an earth that meets heaven, that becomes one and equal as life here, all life, no separation into an alternate reality and this one. It is the actions of the humans, as mind, as consciousness that is the separation from equality as life, from heaven on earth. It is the ignorance of the physical world that is the separation from life. Thus, the reward in realizing life as the value, in realizing we have the answers to what will birth life equal and one with and as heaven, is to support all without fear of loss, as support of all life, to move as what is considerate of all life, to enact what is best for all, what is for the common good. What we allow at present is profit before life. There is no “before “ life, what we have is “before” life, a system that is standing right “before” the gift of life, ignoring it and it is right here, right in front of us.
The reward is being able to give what is best for all. What else is there?

Day 143 Security

Demon (Photo credit: Johnny Söderberg)

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to want security, not realizing that in wanting this security I am in separation from myself as life, here, as being life is the security, is the value, as what i am, yet within a system that does not value life, and values commodities and the grabbing of freely given resources in self interest, life is ignored and placed within servitude to a false secondary god, blind to this false self glorification, that is itself made of the substance of life, and cannot exist without this as what it is, thus has a false god been worshipped, a totem made in separation from what is the value, the gift given, which is life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that my anxiety is a desire to be secure, an action of myself believing something can be lost, when what will be lost is what is not real, what has not been valued, which is life, as what I am, as what all that is here is the very substance of, made secondary to ownership of resource, and thus diminished into servitude to the glorification of object as primary, when what is real, what is absolute is the very substance of what is here, that is what all that is here is, which is life, being alive, thus all judgements are limitations and of no direction, supporting and directing that which is the value , which is life, here.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that in not allowing what is here to express itself as the form of itself, is to deny life, to fear losing one;s position within a hierarchy that idolizes a false god, as the commodity, the object, the ownership is to continue the denial of life, as this is what is real , as this is the constant, where the object and the resource change form and never remain the same, thus the value is being, is life, thus this is what is primary, as what is the same within all that is here, thus all there is, is to be forgiving of oneself in and as life, here.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that being life is about being forgiving of oneself in and as life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand how much idolatry I allow and accept myself to exist as, where I am so busy in worship that I no longer see what is primary, which is life/being and instead I see the heresy and the object, where I have been lead to believe that one object is more than another, when this is myself no longer able to see life, as I no longer am able to see what is the real value, which is life. thus my own judgements are indicative of my separation from life, and my idol worship, and I was warned not to worship a false god, as this would lead to division and war, abuse and neglect of life, which is exactly what is manifest on this earth, where many are staving, many are existing in diminished health, in lack of self development in and as life, where the very state of this earth, as the gift of life, has been misused, and slowly moves towards extinction, as we see with so many of the animals that are here, where we have become so separated from life, that we, the human, will leave a dog in a cage and forget about that dog, allow it to starve and live a horrible existence because we can no longer see what is the value, which is life, thus we are all equally responsible for what exists on this earth, as each of us  fears to stand up as ourselves as life here, not realizing that this must be done and that it is the only way out, each and every one of us must stand and realize the primary value is life, and thus life must be supported as all as one as equal, and what will be given is what is the gift, as life, where earth will become heaven on earth.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that there is only forgiveness.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that there is no security among idol worshippers.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the worship of an idol, be it an obsession with a desire, or possession, will consume the worshipper , as this is an act of war against life, which s exactly what exists on this earth today, where more money is spent on war than on life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that this behavior of pathological destruction  is the outcome of separation from life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that administrators are so caught up in their making of money, and so departmentalized that when they discover a problem they go to another department and hear what they want to hear, and do not actually go and investigate for themselves, because if they were to, they would find the unacceptable and then have to report this, and that would mean the end of their jobs, thus the only solution is to stand and change this world into a system that supports all life, which can be done from a desk, through supporting through democratic means, standing up and voting for  an equal money system, to start organizing this world into a system that supports all life, where life is the value, instead of a false god.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that there are penis worshippers, who would rather march to have the foreskin of a penis cut off, and thus within this act be so consumed with a piece of skin on a penis that comes before the consideration of children being forcibly taken and made to work on chocolate plantations in the Ivory Coast, where they receive no education and are left without any means of self development, and this is placed second to a belief that a piece of skin on a penis should  be taken off. 

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand how jerking off to a picture of a naked lady is , be it a memory in the mind, or a picture, is the worship of a false idol, as this is separation from what is here, life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that buying sex from a child, is forcing a life into one’s own idol worship and is not self being and respecting self as life, or life in general, as the respect of that child as life is ignored, with no consideration of the potential of that child as life, thus self as life is non existent, and self as life is responsible for self as life, as this is the only way to become life, to stand as self as life , here.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that within such an existence there is no security, as the separation from what is the value, from what is real, obviously leads to behaviors that consume as they never lead to the autonomous expression of life, which is the meaning of worshipping a false idol/god as one is not forgiving life, as this is the value.

I commit myself to realizing that to worry about security in a world of false worship is like trying to find a safe haven in a world overrun with zombies, just as we tell ourselves in the movies and shows we create, as we all know what we are doing, yet we want someone else to stand up and take care of this for us.

I commit myself to seeing, realizing and understanding the common sense of the need to change the world into and as a system of equality, where life is supported as the value, and thus will life become existence on earth, as what is supported is what is experienced, and right now with the growing number of homeless in America, life is not what is being lived, but fear, and homelessness,, insecurity and the growing profits for the few.

I commit myself to seeing , realizing and understanding that the growing number of suicides within men in our society, is indicative of hopelessness within a system of economic slavery known as debt, where in order to stop this, all debt must be forgiven and freely given resource must be distributed to support life as there is enough on this earth to support life, all that need be done is for many to stand and say stop, the value is life, and thus all life on this planet must be supported as life is the value.

I commit myself to realize that all that can be done is to walk what is necessary to support life, and this means the creations of a system that  values life, and thus supports life, equal and one, in plant, animal and human, soil, water and air, and the solution of an equal money system, where the earth has the technology to organize this into and as what is existent here in fact.

I commit myself to seeing, realizing and understanding that the voices in my mind, are the sounds of my separation the impressions accepted and allowed within a system of inequality, as what has been taught to enslave life expression to the worship of a false idol/image/idea as self fears standing up as self as life within common sense, this that we all know, yet unless we walk self forgiveness, to remove the resonant design, embedded within the very waters of our human physical bodies, the voices in our heads, and the obsessions of our desires will become all that we are, and take over the physical and we will, as has been happening, suddenly begin to eat the face of another human, physically manifesting what we have allowed within and as ourselves, to allow the worship of false idols to become demons that possess us, when all that has  happened is our lying and deceit is consuming us and taking over, thus will our own accepted and allowed personas of survival, characters of self interest, burn what is left of our human physical bodies.

I commit myself to investigate the desteni I process and an equal money system, to change this world to heaven on earth, where the value is life.

Desteni

EqualMoney System

Desteni I Process

Eqafe

Creation's Journey To Life
Heaven's Journey To Life
Earth's Journey To Life

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Day 70 Suppression of common sense begins in childhood

Day 70 Suppression of common sense begins in childhood

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see realize and understand that as a child my own common sense what rejected and ignored.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize that in “shutting down” my own common sense I lost the ability of myself to communicate.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand , that there is no common sense within this world and what I am as what I have become to fit into a world that does not consider and respect and work with this physical world, is a reflection of the shutting down of my own common sense that happened over the number of years it took for me to become an adult, and that the adult I have become is devoid of common sense.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear using my common sense for fear that I will be ignored and attacked as this is what happened to me as a child, and thus this memory is  based in fear of attack attached to myself resonantly as I am programmable, as self one and equal to an awareness of this physical world as what I am as life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear being myself for fear I will not survive in a world that attacked me, as I was a child and it was believed I had no sense, when this does not make sense as children can rapidly learn things, more so than the supposed “developed” adult.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize that what I was seeing happening to the young girls who were models in NYC when I was a teenager, was their common sense being shut down as they stepped into and as a limited design in and as the “perfect” looking woman, as a role, trying to fit into the media image idea of what a woman “sould” herself as to survive, as common sense does not fit into a system that only serves profit for the few.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the soldiers committing suicide, one a day at this time, are doing so as they are being forced to go against their own common sense of life, and thus of their equality to all life, where they have been lead to believe that they are not fulfilling the perfect male “dominator” role and thus are a failure to their country, a country of politicians and corporations composed of people who allow and support the rules dictated through their participation, saying they are just doing their job and not realizing that it is the actions of each and everyone of us that create the “water the fish swim in” as what this society has become in totality - a society in separation from a common sense of this physical world.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that our soldiers are in conflict with their own common sense as life and the “G.I. Joe” image and likeness they played with as children, a doll sold to practice the boy into being sould to a system that supports the flow of money to a few and to being a limited means of making a living - as this is all that is offered- while all this effort and development could just as well be used to provide clean drinking water for this world, to provide the means to live a dignified life where children are allowed to become adults in full capacity of their common sense, an existence of heaven on earth, where fathers could actually spend time with their children without the stress and anxiety of financial indebtedness hanging over their heads and causing the manifestation of anxious behavior.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting a system that continues  an existence of war when the sons of this earth are committing suicide, a clear indication that life is not being supported.

I forgive myself  for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that not only is it a crime to go into another country and kill children to obtain freely given earth resources, but that it is also a crime to send the sons of this earth into killing fields to become puppets to a few who believe they have a right to more than that which is one and same as them, all that exists on this earth that is life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the children and wives of these men committing suicide are left to a world that cannot explain why suicide exists as all common sense has been shut down, where if one really has a look at this, suicide is a clear indication that this system existent on earth is not supporting life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see realize and understand that the suppression of myself is the suppression of life, and that what I am being taught by this present system, as evident with the existence of suicide on this earth, is not what develops and supports what it is that I am, which is life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that until suicide no longer exists on this earth, life is not what is being lived on this earth.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that when some man with a degree tells me that the suicide of my husband is not my fault, this supposedly educated person is only giving sympathy, and not telling me anything of any value or explanation as to why suicide exists.

I forgive myself  for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that the very existence of myself as not being able to explain suicide is my self telling me that there is no explanation, as suicide is the very manifestation of a lack of common sense as what this present system on earth is in fact, and as how the human has not been allowed to develop in common sense, thus what exists on this earth is a system of limited design, and not of common sense.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that a child is gentle and giving and thus perhaps this is the nature of the human as life, where within and as this nature is the ability to learn rapidly, and thus this ability would be the presence of a child in and as common sense, as common sense is the ability to sense this world to a greater degree than what that child turns into as an adult, where the adults of this world serve a system of limited design, and thus become an e(nergy)go that serves a system that obviously does not support life, as if life were supported, there would be no starvation, no rape, no suicide, no child sex trafficing, no disease, no  ADHD, no cancer, where all of these things are growths of destruction and SUPPRESSION of life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see , realize and understand that advertising spends billions of dollars a year to influence the public, and that they continue to do so because it works, tells me that the human is programable and thus, the stories and images all over the media are doing the same, and thus everything that is propagated by the media is the dis-focusing of common sense, thus must the billions of dollars a year continue to be spent in order to keep the separation from and suppression of self as life, as self in common sense of life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that my obsessions and addictions are one and the same to what is plastered all over this earth by media.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize see and understand that the only way out of this separation from life as what this system allows is to change this system to one that supports life where the answer is  “to give as you would like to receive,” as does this earth.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to sit down and look at how much of the federal budget is spent on war, how much is spent on alcohol, how much is spent on advertising alone and to realize that this could be spent on supporting life, thus is there no excuse for not implementing a basic income grant to support life first, where it would soon be discovered that crime would come to an end, that many of the abusive behaviors that exist are caused by accepting the unacceptable simply to survive and that this must be done to stop the sons of man from committing suicide.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that soldiers committing suicide is the child unable, in common sense , to support and maintain the accepted and allowed world system of profit/greed and survival.

I forgive myself for not allowing myself to see, realize and understand that this system of greed and profit is so indifferent to life that it sends the sons of man onto battlefields to clean up bombs made of depleted uranium where it is known that this substance will lead to a horrible death as this uranium is radioactive.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that this same depleted uranium is subtly labeled as “depleted” to misinform and lead astray as it suggests that somehow it is no longer uranium.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to research what this depleted uranium is doing to the children being born in the areas where this depleted uranium was used and all in the name of grabbing resources to support the existence of a few on the top of a pyramid that need not exist, as this earth is able to support life in dignity for all.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I accepted and allowed the rush of energy that leads to obsession and possession, all of which is one and the same as myself as I became and desired to be the image and likeness as that which is promoted by the media and advertising.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that I have allowed myself to separate myself from my common sense and thus suppressed myself as life, thus am I as much to blame as the people on the top of this pyramid, and thus the only solution is to deconstruct this pyramid by standing up and supporting a system of equality - an Equal Money System and/or a Basic Income Grant, which can only be done through coming together as a group and developing a majority to stand and place, through a vote, a system that supports life as the value, to remove the evil - living eye as a centralized power that suppresses self directive autonomy, as self is capable of when common sense is allowed to develop as what the human is as life.

I commit myself to showing the human how programmable the human is through revealing what has been accepted on this earth to the extent the human no longer can fathom any other existence than what has been propagated.

I commit myself to revealing that the desteni i process is about deprogramming what is resonantly held within and as the human physical body that is the self separated into and as energy, where the energetic addiction has consumed all the focus of the human, to the point where it is believed that nothing else exists and to the point where many of our children can no longer read.

I commit myself to practice standing in common sense, again and again and again , no matter how many times I fall, until it is done, until there is heaven on earth.

I commit myself to pointing out how advertising spends billions to indoctrinate and enslave to energetic fixes that need constant sustenance to survive, where the movies and words in all media, including the stories sould are essentially the same thing, as that the media is paid for by those who have control of money and thus what is propagated by media is configured in such as way to keep the addictions fed and not to sustain and develop a self directed human in common sense of what is real as this physical world.

I commit myself to asking questions that cause friction within the program of energy as polarities towards my fellow men and  to no longer fear the cognitive dissonance as the mind seeks an answer in singularities that have no answer as a sense of the whole and totality of existence has not been developed.

I commit myself to no longer wanting to win something, or becoming righteous, as I realize that in a system of equality, I will not be known or become famous or have more than another, thus is there nothing to win in promoting a system of equality as what will be won/one is myself as life much like the smile of a child before the tantrums of energetic desire consume and begin the separation of myself into and as wanting to be special when the value is simply myself here, being life.

I commit myself to explaining to others that the idea of self direction, as self expression, as self honesty, as self responsibility will seem like a huge fearful thing when seen through the eyes of a mind that has been made huge and addictions that seem insurmountable as nothing else has been taught, and that the physical is here to support as this is what is real as this is what is supporting all of us, as what is real is what has been allowed to be owned by a few, who themselves are in separation from life.

I commit myself to realizing that what desteni is saying is that the configuration of this world can be reconfigured to support life, and that the tools are here, they just need to be directed, by the hands of men, to support all life and to end this world system of profit and greed.

Suicide

Equal Money - vote to support life.

Creation's Journey to Life

Heaven's Journey to Life

Day 69 Unworthiness as reaction to Irritation

Day 69 Unworthiness as reaction to Irritation

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become reactive to irritation.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to take confusion and irritation, as cognitive dissonance personally.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to react to irritation and cognitive dissonance, where I looked only at the emotion of this behavior/response and reacted instead of realizing irritation as cognitive dissonance, where, as the word suggests, there existed a misunderstanding or deconstruction of belief, opinion and idea, and within this the irritation had only to do with a process of realignment.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become reactive to discord, irritation, cognitive dissonance, to the point where all I looked at was the emotion and not the words being spoken and within this direct myself as what is best for all, meaning giving what was actually happening a directive within the principle of what is best for all: within this it is easy to see that a child does not have the verbal capacity and development to be able to realize that adult irritation is a limited mind in cognitive dissonance existing within values indoctrinated to survive within a system of inequality, a system of profit, which has been going on for generations.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become submissive within this, in self pity, that I had done something wrong, not realizing that I was creating a belief within myself that I was unworthy and unheard, when in fact all that existed, as indicated by irritation, was a cognitive dissonance that simply required a common sense directive within what is best for all.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that all that was needed was to stop and breath, look in common sense of what is best for all, and use the capacity of myself here, as a human being, to realize a directive that is within the principle of what is best for all.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to  realize that, as a child, I was not trained to do this, and instead taught the roles of a woman, to be submissive and to develop myself in accordance with what enabled my survival within a system of limited design to support a system of money usage for profit for a few instead of money/resource usage that support the value of life as this physical world as what is real.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that irritation is cognitive dissonance, and thus a moment where the mind must review what has been accepted and allowed as belief, opinion and idea, and deconstruct to include a new view point and that this can cause a moment of  disassociation from accepted and allowed patterns, where, within this, a direction can be given that is within the principle of “giving as you would like to receive” instead of what serves a profit based system that has caused an existence on this earth where many lack the basic necessities to live a life in dignity, thus is causing irritation  a natural consequence of changing the habits and beliefs that support a system of inequality, a system that is showing the human how ineffective it is in supporting life, with the amount of abuse to animal, plant, soil and human, manifesting as the rapid depletion of earth’s resources and unacceptable living conditions on earth at this time.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see realize and understand that I developed my own feelings and emotions of unworthiness, begun in childhood as I was not taught to direct myself within the principle of what is best for all, or taught that as a human I am capable of being trained to use my human physical body, to work in tandem with this physical world and develop myself in ways yet unknown with a system that dis-allows human development in favor of preparing humans through family, education ,media, to serve a system of profit for the few, evident in the frustrated behaviors manifesting on earth at this time, where people are killing their children, eating other humans, where soldiers are committing suicide and children are being bombed by remote control to allow a few to have control of earth’s resources, resources given unconditionally by this physical world to support life.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize that this pattern I have accepted and allowed is in this moment constricting my lower back and causing constriction to flow down into my legs as I fear speaking within and as my writing that I am somehow not speaking clearly enough, where I spin around in and as my mind looking for a way out and cannot find one, as my mind operates in singularities and cannot see what is best for all, which means I have become that which I fear.

I commit myself to breathing, to stopping the allowance of myself into and as fear.

I commit myself to realizing that fear is an energetic possession within my human physical body as myself in separation from myself where the only choice is to breath and direct myself within the principle of what is best for all.

I commit myself to realizing all images in and as my mind are showing me how I have separated from myself and thus are not real, only energetic possessions I am allowing to draw my attention away from what is physically here and real.

I commit myself to revealing that this is what is happening to our children where we label this as ADD and ADHD, where parents of these children take schools to court to demand a private/special education not realizing that it is the parent that has developed this very inability to focus on what is actually here as what the child exists as, and therefor in taking the schools to court, are the parents abdicating their responsibility and wanting a system - the very accepted and allowed system that is one and equal to the cause of the lack of focus in the human- to take responsibility for their child.

I commit myself to not allowing and accepting myself to believe that I am unworthy, and realizing that reacting to irritation and discord necessitates a corrective action within utilizing the principle of what is best for all, where practice in giving direction instead of allowing reactions as defense, spite, blame, insecurity, wanting to win,  and fear of loss are not an action of resolution to and towards the principle of what is best for all, the principle of giving as one would like to receive.

I commit myself to revealing that the method of operation within this present system, through media, family and education, suggests that the human is programmable, and thus the human is able to realize that this present system of inequality is not the natural state of life, as it needs constant broadcast to perpetuate it’s propagated desires, wants and needs, to support the few, and thus can this world be changed to a world that supports life, a heaven on earth.