Thursday, July 25, 2019

Day # 828 We are a natural and great sentience!

Things are uncovered as one lives in this life, if one takes the time to look. This means stepping outside of programming, of coping mechanisms. A coping mechanism is a belief, opinion or/and idea. It is a means to self direct. That means is built from experience. The foundational presumptions, as the sums absorbed, are determined by those first years of life. We are so amazing because we absorb EVERYTHING. This in itself reveals that we humans are programmable. We become what is in our environment, we absorb everything - as a natural SENSIBILITY. We then practice that. This then habituates. Meaning, what we practice inhabits our bodies, like a ghost in the machine, to the extent it is then what motivates us, directs us. As we FOCUS on that inner movement of accumulated actions, we can become distracted from seeing what is here in plain sight. That alone, shows oneness and equality potentiality.  We absorb everything, which means we are naturally present, we have a natural presence. We then can get lost in processing the information we absorbed. This then comes at the expense of a natural ability to ABSORB what is not only within us! If we forget the difference, we get locked in our own accepted and allowed practices. Because we are ONLY looking within, and if we do this for a long time, we forget the difference! 

An overuse of the imagination can be likened to water, too much or too little and we have physical problems, leading to death, yet just enough is the very means of life! 

Ever know someone who repeats things. It sounds like they are always self validating? If something is said that is not in synch/accord/agreement with the repetitious perceptions ( begging for clarity), they react. Why, because they see ONLY their experience, an experience of limited awareness because they have become a personification of ideas, beliefs and opinions, which would then be defended because it is all that is apparent as the person as overusing the imagination at the expense of being present - that which existed BEFORE that personality accrued as a series of acceptances of ideas, beliefs and opinions! 

The motivation behind separation is fear. Somewhere, as this process of self building occurred, a fear happened most probably because of overusing that inner information picture at the expense of presence, causing a disconnect that then lead to insecurity that is that sense of fear ( ever feel scattered and “ loopy”?). If that was not sorted out, it accumulated and then one is consumed within protecting that fear. This in itself is a state of separation from what is natural! 

Defending that fear, made a resonant belief system, will in itself, fluctuate. Meaning, one will go into a neutral zone in reaction to consequences of protecting that fear, and from there move back into what appears to lend direction as that emotional fear, that is justification of that fear, as validating the reasons for that reaction to fear. From that justification one will move back to a neutral zone. It is like being in an aftershock of some experience, a space of  “ nothing” as a lack of directing. Then, if the fear is not addressed that caused the reaction that caused the “ upsetting” friction , that space between one’s reaction as an initiating point in the moment, and one’s original programming of information of lack as “ not enough information” will be a moment of no-movement. Then one bounces back into one’s programming that lead to the movement that caused the friction. The space between these to experiences, when one has not addressed the initial programming as self directives, will have a neutral quality as a lack-of-taking-any-direction. That neutral zone is like falling back on a fundamental programming built from a fundamental lack of clarity. 

Yet, overall,  this is amazing because it reveals how things are built - as small accumulating movements! Things are built the same way, meaning things are done, one step at a time. Each brick is laid on a foundation one at a time, until the whole is complete. If that process of one-step-at-a-time was well constructed, the foundation is solid and supportive. It allows much more to be accomplished. If that foundation was done in a rush, without careful and patient movement, it will not have the means to face life, and it will consume the attention because it will require constant readjustment. That in itself is a distraction from real growth. A growth of that same presence, into understanding this living reality in which we spend this life. It is very simple in so many ways. That defending of that faulty foundation, and the chaos it generates, is what is complicated. 

To some extent, actually in all extent, speaking up about this in a system lost within this, using this in self interest, because money has become god ( is your life determined by money? If the answer is no, than you are lost in your mind) is pretty simple! It means sticking to this fundamental obviousness as to how we actually function. And yet, because of this how we function is really awesome! It is to say that a faulty, or limited SYSTEM is still a created SYSTEM which is amazing as a creative ability in itself - despite the default!

It cannot be any other way. How do we learn about who and what we are as parts if it were not so? We have a memory, as a mind, we have our physical bodies and we have this earth. This is right here. This is visible. This remains after we pass. Would we want someone who cannot function in this practical reality? Would we want someone who spends their time in this life believing there is some other life out there somewhere? Is that not in itself a self abdication? And if one has programmed one’s self as that, would it not be hard to let that go and change, when one is already practicing being stuck in a limited belief system?  Given that money has been allowed to determine life in a system where that same allowance as money-determining-life seeks to always OWN what is here, is that not an ad-mission that the program being generated by that same system that seeks to OWN what is here, realizes that the illusion of another life is in deed and illusion? I mean, how does one program but through repetition, and knowing how we work, how does one program what THEY want  but through airing information as a limited-story that through that repetition is what is in the environment that is then what is absorbed! And, because it does not fit into this reality, it becomes that foundation that ends up needing constant repair thereby distracting one from one’s natural ability to absorb information that is here!  It is that we are absorbing SUPER-imposed information, separate from reality!  

The real “ god” is that means, that ability to absorb information, that when correctly structured allows one to realize what has been absorbed, AND what is that which is being absorbed as where it comes from, and what one is in relation to all of this! Being locked in a consciousness petrie-dish, as an overuse of the imagination, ends up having one drown in that limited information, of which is visible, because one is too busy defending that limited foundation and as such, has no real ability to self direct in this reality AND this on top of a system that mirrors this disconnect ! It is a quantum conundrum. 

It can only be corrected through deconstructing the parts to then reconstruct to rebuild a foundation that can realize what is moving within and what is moving without to see the choices that support life instead of being lost in protections that are a defense of a state of lack. If one is present, as the initial absorbent state that children have, one would be as that child, more at ease, more in awe of life, and more desirous to participate in life - as being in defense tends to lead to shutting out life, and instead isolating one’s self from potential threats because one is in a state of lack. Being in that state of protection is so consuming. All one’s life force is consumed by it. One never really lives, one never can really learn who and what one is as life? It is why we have such subtle stories made into fantasy such as the story of humpty dumpty, because on that level way under our information storm that are polarized value judgements, we know. We know something is out of balance. 

What is the point that I am spinning around in? This post of right-eousness? This point of wanting to win wanting to be right instead as inner occupation, instead of problem solving? Wanting to solve problems is the only solution, and this is done by taking things apart and reconstructing them. Everything is a system, and systems have recognizable PATTERNS.

It is necessary to call things out by name, because then the action is called out and the person has no other option but to realize that someone else realizes their movements, thus there is great power in calling things our by name.

Within doing presentations in terms of reading development, it is clear that it means describing how we work, how we build ghost personalities that we are lost within, and how wanting another to realize as validate that set body of ideas, beliefs, opinions as a form of INFORMATION, will not be able to hear anything else but that, as one must first realize that which one is being as that limited static-construction automated within. That this is used, overall , is a lack of full disclosure.  Using this for self gain, or believing that harm exists in any way, as one small group is attempting to play god as this, is a crime against life. It cannot be legal in any sense of the terms because it is being that which it accuses another of being! Thus, no one can play god, because the real god is how creation/building actually functionally works! 

I can see where my attention is so much on ordering things for survival. Within that, the dialogues around me that are of constant self validation and justification. I especially notice this after having lived with my one son with whom I had developed a point where we recognized moving into emotional spins instead of being practical in the moment. The absence of the emotional spins create a much calmer environment. 

In the presence of this, these emotional self validations - which are constant as this is the movement of a mind consciousness - requires self evaluation with a shift into, instead, finding solutions, and to remain in that presence no matter what. 

The mind tends to bring forward set bodies of information, as big chunks of ideas, beliefs and opinions. The nature of this is “ of a spin” because it is the holding onto of a story with a set morality as a context separate from realizing the practical movement of things. That we have statements of and as what are basically comparison, as building the lesser evil, means that we are already lost in polarized fairly tales. As a fairy tale, separate from the measure of the physical reality, it must be like our present advertising system, our present entertainment system - a constant that generates through unceasing expression, just as the physical is a steady constant expression - yet one of balance and ease. I mean, why do we feel a calm and greater lightness in the presence of nature, or when we are by the sea side? Contrast that to a conversation with a partner when in disagreement. There is a lot of “ heavy” friction as a form of  pushing/forcing as a  constriction in the body, as that same sense as that lightening ease that one can experience by the sea. It is a tangible difference. 

Ever been around a couple who go into a conflict and begin to argue? Ever just walk away? Why is such a situation causing such a reaction? If one goes into a forest or stands next to the ocean, from my experience, there is a calming, a lightening, a sense of a coolness and “ flowing-lightness.” It is not something one moves away from, whereas when parents begin to argue, the kids will tend to remove themselves, as separate themselves from the conflict. That conflict is much heavier. That spin of values, where two people are attempting to argue their inner constructions that are not in synch with creative ability, as problem solving ability, or solution oriented movement. Instead they are forcing, pushing, projecting that self construction of self validation, of self’s inner construction as a morality of value judgements, as a story of information. By nature, because it is separate from creation, it will be hyper-tense and heavy, because it is not being present and realizing creation as how the physical creation is and does.

The physical is practical and is built by one small movement accumulating into a form. A mind consciousness, is also built the same way, yet its starting point is of fear- thus it is as it sounds, as that more heavy, friction laden entity. It is of value judgements, in protection and defense of the shame of believing fear even exists in the face of real creation. Creation being something practical. 

One can be within their polarized “ box” and either have a more ordered “ box” of a less ordered “ box.” Within this present system, and again in comparison, that more ordered “ box’ can exist as comparison to a less “ ordered” box. One can remain there, yet their are glimpses, in moments, when one sees outside that box. 

If we take the time to look, one can have that same experience of greater ease, as one can sense the difference between being present in this reality, and being caught up in a resonant mind consciousness as one’s beliefs, opinions and ideas that are of a limited morality, evident in that friction and conflict that is heavier than that sense of ease one can experience when being near the sea or walking in a forest. A limited morality can have a sense of “ what if?” that is fear, heavy as potential worst case scenarios, where one is in protection as survival instead of present - bringing forward solutions that lend greater ease. This “ ease” has that quality of lightness, similar to standing near the sea, or walking in a forest. 

The same experience can happen within reading or playing in instrument. One must focus on the actual when playing an instrument, or when reading something, even a conversation being “ reading” something, as processing information. There were moments when I was focused while playing where that playing had a general ease about it, with an ability to face the unexpected and move through it without upsetting the overall “ beat.”  That, and when one is “ reading” as reading words or listening to the “ words” of another in a conversation can be the same experience. I realize in moments, I have some reactions that are simply a recognition that something is not, somehow, “ sound.” Meaning, there is something lacking in real connection, or there is somehow a jump in reason in some way. I have in my life, spoken up and questioned such moments, not completely understanding why I was reacting in detail, only to have the limited polarized “ story” begin to defend itself, as a resonant mind consciousness of composed values is an “entity”. It is by design a limited construction, because it has that same tense quality to it, as it must re-express itself constantly, in order to “ survive.” Thus because of this, it will have a quality of defensiveness/offensiveness and have a heavier quality to it, yet once one begins to realize this, that same seeming “ heavy” quality has no real substance and is as a consequence, really a tiny tiny thing in relation to this physical reality. Does this appear to be a dichotomy in itself?. If one ONLY sees the projections as the mind being overused and as such of-a-tense/polarized/value-justifying entity, it will appear HUGE. 

In itself the greater that projection appears, the deeper one is lost in the same limited system.  There is another math that exists that can potentially expose this same perspective. That is that one can notice, the less we know someone, the more we require emotional value judgements. The more we know someone, the more we can use” facts.” This is to say,  when we first meet someone, using facts can overwhelm, we tend to tout what we see as what gives us value, and we praise the same in the person we meet. As we get to know someone, we come forward with more data as facts. 

This is also evident in sales processes. When we first meet a client, we are all praise, we are HUGE in value judgements. As we move along, we use some facts. It is, lol, like walking through a bureaucratic defense system as out present system.  As we work with someone, we can bring forward more and more specificity. I mean, that is also how we learn something new; we begin with generalities and move into greater and greater detail. Also, look at how we learn to crawl and to walk and to talk. We have this space that we begin to move our bodies within, as we narrow down, as we become more specific in the space, we begin to be able to “ will” our bodies to move in the space with greater specificity. I mean, that is how we build understanding to the extent we can express with what is here. If there is any kind of friction, we are living an expression that does not fit into this reality.  Or, we are not reading the environment clearly - there exists an inner distraction occupying attention. And, naturally, if someone is playing “ god” within this, because of an accumulated consequence of not understanding this overall, a system within these accumulated individual systems will begin to emerge, and naturally, it will consume the present system and eventually end, because it has consumed that which it has mis-used and of which it cannot exist without! It will manifest an orchestra that is very out of tune! Look around, what do we have on earth today, with increasing attention disorders, poverty, animal extinction, deforestation, pollution,  chronic anxiety, etc. ?

An entity caught in a limited construction of information, that would because of its limitation, be polarized as value judgements, that is energy instead of sound balance, would be difficult to see outside of its resonant storm made larger-than-life. I mean, we become what we practice. What we practice accumulates, just as a musician who practices “ right” action, as being present with an instrument leads to a mastery of their craft. If we practice limited information, we will find more and more conflict with reality, instead of real and sound interactions. In this case we cannot trust memory, yet that same memory is showing where we dis-associated from this reality! Ironically, it also means we can trust our memory to show us to ourselves! Being in an inner state of friction would make it difficult to hold and reform seemingly opposite values. lol, I suppose it could be said one is stuck in a linear model that interrupts jumping into quantum assessment. No one can correct this but the self. And blame is more distraction. 

We can become a morality of victimhood, or self righteousness, or passive aggression. We hold tightly onto our self composed limitations. We practice justifying lack. One cannot play a musical instrument if one has this spinning ego. Yet, one can have an extremely well composed “ box” as “inform” that can move into automation. There are stories of what we call “ masters” of instruments, who travel around the world playing concertos, for instance, that are known to get out onto the stage and perform while very very drunk. They programmed their muscles, and inner ability to memorize things, at a young age, with a very well defined understanding, that has automated. Thus, their body goes into automation and they themselves realize to some extent what has happened, and don’t know how to get out, and simply attempt to hide in what has happened by disassociating themselves from their own bodies and programming, to the extent they seek alcohol. 

Yet, this must eventually catch up with them. I have experienced musicians that were in famous quartets for a while. They have performed the same pieces so many times, and are consumed by this, that suddenly having to play something different is very difficult. They have lost changeability, even though they can perform a complex piece very well. They have  a hard time stepping out of that habituated box.  lol, I am sure some can recognize when a known “ master” moves to play something new, in a small group setting, and it sounds disjointed and the sudden reaction within the room is this sudden deep silence, where no one dares speak up because of a shock of and as “ did that just happen!” That silence in itself reveals our capacity to see as sense the math of the language of the moment in the space! That moment of sensing that, before one bounces back into one’s own resonant construction as personification, is more of that part of self, that can sense the lightness when being next to the sea, or walking through a forest - one is absent energetic states that is of value judgements. This is visible when what is being expressed is lacking in some real connectedness. This can happen in any setting, unless we are not present because we are consumed by our own inner resonant constructions causing separation from being in respect of what is real and actual and here, as this creation of the physical reality that is the very means of expression - even a more-well-formed expression that is not equal to life as the proverbial “ box.” 

The degree to which things are structural and therefore, a system, from my opinion, become more and more clear as a mathematical/geometrical form. As things are inherently form and function by their very design.

This is incredibly awesome, and yet, for some, frightening. Why would such statements be a reason to cause a reaction? Because, it means that the “ math” that is us, that we have allowed, is the fault of no one but the self. And yet, that very statement is also incredibly empowering! It allows each one of as to realize how much we are creators! If we would but forgive reactions, slow down for a moment, breath and look at this, the “ freeing” of ourselves within - as that which inhibits this natural ability inherent in the incredible sensory nature of our physical bodies - we might experience a sudden movement in our immediate time and space moment.  

The degree to which we are reactive, is most likely the degree to which we are separate from that natural ability within and as us, as who and what we are as physical sentient states of being. We are designed to sense here. We are designed to be present here. Being focused HERE, would be our senses in full play, which would be a state of great joy - that kind of joy, as a state of awe, we see in young children - BEFORE the 3rd/4th grade, when inner experiences absorbed from the environment ( mostly parents) are the behaviors of suppressing and hiding, manifest as pushing-the-recognition of this state-of-separation away. 

I believe it was Noam Chomsky who basically said that the educated were educated just enough to believe they are educated. And, I believe it was Abraham Lincoln who basically said that we humans spend so much time and energy suppressing ourselves as in making-ourselves-stupid. Both of these perspectives mirror the degree to which we are suppressing an amazing natural ability as the very form and function of who and what we are! 

I recently was involved in a situation in which there was a reaction. When I spoke up about this, I felt that I was facing what I called a slippery-fish. It was something like trying to bring a telescope into focus. Meaning, no matter what I said, even in spelling out the laws and details, every word could not be heard. The quality of the persons standing before me was of what I call this “ vacuous” presence. I could sense this, see the focus of the person as a lack of being focused within and through the eyes. With hindsight, ( which actually shows me to myself in many respects! lol) there was a similar pattern, like a similar  “ song,” like having read so many novels, a pattern emerges and that “ song” becomes recognizable! In DOING the opportunity to LEARN comes forward! And it is why promoted “ lack” can never work - because we humans by design have a natural sentience that can and will recognize repetitions. And, a system of a few playing god, will tend to follow the lowest common denominator thereby over-simplifying as trying to force one-size-fits-all scenario that in its limitation cannot fit into life. Control seeks simple patterns as systems because it is easier to manage. The degree of our own justifications will simplify too, and we will repeat that because it is simply easier to manage that huge belief system that is self suppression - a very busy and distracting state of being.  

I noticed a “ song” as a form, as a state of focus, as a state of being, while interacting with others in relation to a problem in my world. I kept calling it a slippery-fish. It was like an undulating “ thing” within the person. It was like the mirages one can see when driving through a desert and the water evaporating off of the road causes that clear-sheen like “ entity” to warp the road in direct sight. It was not something seen with one’s eyes. It was more sensed. I would say, since I as much as anyone, have suppressed this inner sentience. As a consequence, it is more that bits and pieces of this natural and being-uncovered sentience come through within this hindsight as that part of me returning to utilization of myself as life. I most probably jump between habits and some use of what is natural within and as me. It is, this mirage, this illusion, this hypnotic state of self-suppression-as-life within each of us, that exists by our own individual volition, and it has been going on for generations to the extent it is now an elephant in the room through the law of compounding effects. 

Which brings me back to my starting point. The degree to which we are emotional - as that wall of self suppression manifest as layered value judgements visible in plain sight and simply invisible through practiced intent - is the degree to which we are distant from who and what we really are as life. There is a direct correlation between the degree to which we react emotionally to any given situation between self and the mirage we build, as allow to “ swim” around who and what we really are like a rippling effect moving through our muscles. I mean, imagine attempting to learn to read, to learn new things, around this wall of beliefs that move like that kind of fear one experiences manifest as that “ slippery-fish” state that is a consequence of losing self-as-life? That very moment of “ fear” most probably not clarified by parents because they have not clarified this within themselves and therefore cannot teach this to the sentient beings born into their environment as their children and as such, only pass-on the same with each generation?! That projected “ wall” of “ fear” programmed behavior must be cleared before one can effectively express a natural ability to be present and here, equal and one to the living creation that would in all common sense be PHYSICAL. 

In the course of this most recent experience, I kept stopping and saying to myself that “ I felt like I was dealing with a slippery-fish.” Thus, my conscious self, as most probably the 5% of my mind consciousness system, was narrowing the overall general sensation into my cultural iconography as a “ slippery-fish.” Within my layered con-science as my practice, turned habit, within the subconscious was all the math of this reality from my family, the justifications, the fears, the culture icons that so often represent things from nature, were the language coming up talking to me, showing me where I was - what I was BEING. AND, because of the soup within my self, that is its own “ slippery-fish,” needed to be decoded. I mean, would not self-stupefication be of the elements from our own environments! Like I said, creation is in plain sight! Creating “ simplifying imagery as icons, is a form of efficient processing, to control and then “ hold”  within.  This is like a “ string” of symbols - which are WORDS - as “ loopy” self directives. It is to say we are efficient in our reasoning to manage lack. It all works BOTH ways. That is amazing! 

My inner template of “ buttons” to build expression that generates my movements, were of a practice that was the same as that slippery-fish and that is as a mirage - that is more sensed by the ripple effect it creates because of its lack of real substantive movement - I encountered in relation to this recent event. Having existed in my mind-consciousness as accepted and allowed beliefs, ideas and opinions, of polarized value judgments, I am the same as that which I sense in moments. In walking the process of taking this emotional/feeling bubble apart, a natural ability to be more present comes through at times. It is as the Mayan Indians reveled, as the infamous 2012 change on earth, as the apocalypse = A POLE COLLAPSE! I mean, it make sense, within the law of compounding effects that that which is not in synch with real creation would be of an “ entity” that is like a slippery-fish! It has no real staying power, and then would be as a “ mirage” as a state of hyperbole, that is an inner self accepted and allowed hypnotic state. As such, there would be a direct correlation in the degree to which one was en-bubbled in a mirage of polarized beliefs, and the degree to which one would be present. Meaning, the degree to which one was more in equality and oneness with real living creation would have more of that “ quality” that one senses when encountering the sea, of a forest. From my experience and perspective this would have a more awesome natural state that allows one to realize there are no problems and ONLY solutions, and that life would be physical and in plain sight.  I mean what is the proverbial “ veil”?

How does the Machiavellian game of divide and conquer work? What is the voice of “ good and bad” spinning as a voice in the background of one’s mind?

What is most reflective of this, is that those who can process language with greater effect, meaning they are more able to read with greater ease, and more of the words of mankind, tend to have greater success in this reality. This, in terms of functioning within the present system. 

When Noam Chomsky realizes that the educated are educated just enough to believe they are educated, and most of that “ educated” class lack language processing skills of the most successful, has a grain of truth to it. The more successful can process more languages ( as math is a language too) with greater ease than the bubble of the middle class “ professionals” that appear to have more success as bubbles tend to get lost in comparison between limited entities. It is that we are all moving in comparison of our own embraced mirages! Meanwhile, the so called “ elite” have bubbles that one could say are “ boxes” that are of limited information and yet are of a more refined information as a set body of ideas, beliefs and opinions!

We need only watch the internet to realize the hyperbole of which I speak. We need only watch how the internet info-flow is so much like that “ slippery-fish.” We need only look at some of the communication in our relationships to realize how we are defined by our experiences and can only express what we have practiced, and how much we believe that inner slippery-fish to be more real than what is here.  We can realize, with hindsight how scattered we were in a moment, as the ripple effect. The degree to which we have allowed ourselves to exist in emotional states is the degree to which we have scattered ourselves within into value judgements. We have hyper-inflated values in and as survival mode as fear, warping our perception of reality and shutting down the amazing self-as-life! We have created a resonant state of limiting beliefs, opinions and ideas, which means we are creators! We can deconstruct and reconstruct to synch ourselves back into our amazing and natural presence as life, here. 

We can practice our words, to improve our processing of information ability as words, and at the same time, clean up our definitions in a systematic way, to the extent we need not think about the words, and allow what is natural as an ability to be present and spatially process what is here as this creation that is naturally of PHYSICAL formation expressing itself as form and function as what it is as life! We are each one and all amazing because we are life. We can do incredible things! We can work together and show the life within each one, as each one, because we are the sum of parts, individual and yet one. We are the very substance and fabric of life as who and what we are. The ripple effects of this mirage as a divided consciousness, is the stuff of ego, of personality, of projection of limited values - all having a starting point of fear, that is what separation from self-as-life would be. And it is all a “ math.”

There is most likely, a direct correlation between the degree of our separation from ourselves as life - evident in the intensity of our emotional reactions as resistances to learning new things - and the “ distance” from a real expression of and as who we really are as life. And, the backchat in and as our state-of-separation as a mind-consciousness of and as layered and resonant information  within, that moves as a ripple in creation that could be called a slippery-fish, is our scattered selves made larger than life! In reality, we need not “ pursue” happiness, we already are happiness as who and what we are as the very manifested expression of the form and function of and as the physical reality that is life manifest! 

Okay, if this makes some sense, I take this experience into another experience. 

I was talking to this man this week. Suddenly, I noticed that same “ ripple” movement in the muscles of the face and body of this man with whom I spoke. I had a moment jump out at me, of his suppressions being what I called “ infantile.” Meaning, that ripple effect was somehow from wayyyyyyy back in that man’s childhood, or, an initiating effect. He was smothering in this, and could barely process information. The weight of it, the stagnating force of it. This is so crushing, so incredibly crushing - I mean how? Why? 

What I can say, is that when each and every one begins to realize this, the staggering reaction to what has been accepted and allowed in this reality, will lead to a realization of the extent we as life have suppressed the greatness of and as who and what we are.

We are life. We are magnificent creators! We have allowed ourselves to be stuck in fear, as ego. We are so suppressing the AMAZING ability within us and it is visible through and as that ripple effect creating a mirage that we are allowing to direct us and is that which separates us! It is like a slippery-serpentine-fishy-rippling entity “ undulating” through our muscles! It is so weighty and blinding and stagnating! And if we look, we can see through the cracks in moments, and realize the necessity to deconstruct this resonant storm of and as energy, that is like shifting sands occupying out attentions, and eating up the amazing life force within us. 

We are life, we are as that life a great sentience! 

Friday, July 12, 2019

Day #827 To Process

I noticed this imagery coming up in my head - or “ around me.” I put it off through letting it go and then noticed this was not enough, there was a persistence in the nature of this state within me. I stopped and felt overwhelmed yet knew unless I took this apart and forgave that which was feeding this inner desire as an image, as a story, it would continue. I also noticed some emotional reactions that were coming up in relation to certain triggers.

As this was overwhelming to some degree, I had a sense that this was too much - there was a sense of “ impossibility”. I looked at the associations between the imagery and the emotional desire behind that imagery. I looked at the associations as defining one another in relation to the imagery and walked some self forgiveness. 

Afterwards, I checked this and it diminished. This is the power of self forgiveness, to forgive as “ give oneself” to what is existing within and embrace it, to take it apart and correct the ideologies behind the “ inner story/self definition/resonant outflow.” 

I also notice within another scenario in my life, a lot of gloom and doom and worst possible outcome “ devil and angel “  con-versations. In this scenario I have to look at some of the systemic structures to realize common sense within that situation. Thus, I go and I research to understand the sequences and what would be of more balance. This stems the tide of habits I have allowed of polarizing ideas about this reality that generate emotional storms and distract myself from being efficient and working with what is actual and real and practical in this present reality. This calms things. The polarizing emotional storms lessen as a more structural form is realized through walking the steps. 

In the second scenario, I realize I will interact with a group of people who most likely will be emotional. And, within this, I may or may not get a more structural “ model” through within this particular instance. I realize, just as in story, repetition and calm will go further than myself becoming emotional. That, IMHO, is like steering a ship through a storm. 

I realize, within these two examples, and within finding a path of least resistance, it  will be necessary to remain stable and follow through into understanding. In some ways it is a re-scaffolding of insight that lends greater momentum to process greater dimensions of what is being focused upon. This is something each and every one of us has done at some point in one’s life. If we can remember a moment where instead of becoming emotional, we remained calm and held through within lending direction, that moment can show us what is already very natural within us as life. The contrast exists within each of  us of those moments when we ourselves became emotional. With hind-sight most of us realize this and regret our more heavily charged emotional actions. Yet, it is to forgive this and realize what was learned to never react emotionally again and instead be more the model of remaining calm and persisting with telling a “ story “ as scaffolding a greater insight as to what would cause less friction and as such, be a path of least resistance. Humans are happy when they are doing and unhappy when they are not. 

In the most recent weeks I have been looking at the word “ scattered.” I realize moments within what I would call “ being loopy.” I have redefined that within the word “ scattered.”  How could one explain that something can be “ flat” yet be in tune, as music - where that “ flat” quality is a lack of “ tightness”? This is the best way I can explain this at the moment. It is that a lack of real substantive expression has a visible quality of being “ flat.” 

This has opened up looking at what being “ scattered” actually means in space and time. It is mathematical. The greater the degree of becoming emotional the greater the “ spaced out” value judgements I am allowing within myself. This appears in the very words a person speaks and the intensity with which the words are spoken. It is a “ version” that is inherently scattered. This contrasts with less is more. ( I mean “ WHHAAATTT”???- sounds complicated but it is simple in many ways!) 

Words can be expressed with an intensity that is almost harsh, or abrasive, thereby triggering emotions in another if another has defined themselves as value judgements, as polarized belief systems. Remaining steady, as the examples I have experienced, tends to be a state of greater calm. FOCUS, real focus, by nature would be of greater calm, because one’s presence is focused on practical step by step actions. One is too “ busy” with seeing things more directly and as such is more able to make decisions in a common sense way and means. Emotional states are very distracting. Being scattered makes it difficult to take action with efficiency. I mean, what is procrastination but being scattered? One is distracting one’s self from being efficient in one’s actions. This is evident in it taking a long time to get the most simple of actions resolved. 

It is the same within myself. If I allow those resonant scenarios within myself, as ideas, beliefs and opinions to occupy my attention, they become larger, and my actual practical actions take longer. My focus is divided. What charges such inner states is very visible- we have simply practiced suppressing this. We self censor, or self stupefy. 

The irony here, is that investigating and directing myself in this reality, by itself, lends self support. The kind that allows one to build one’s confidence to the extent one can be “ lighter “ within one’s self and thus, enjoy doing the most simple of things!  Thus, one becomes more joyful within realizing the small steps that get things done. This in itself removes that sense of being scattered! 

Being “ scattered” is being in fear, because one does not have a direct and efficient means within one’s self in relation to walking things in a way that they are done with efficiency. One could say that being efficient is being in a state of grace. Why do I say grace? Because we are moving in a state that is a path of least resistance, thereby having the space and time to enjoy the simple that composes the more complex. Is so many ways this is how a creation of states of separation exist and how states of calm and self confidence exist because the outcomes of walking with presence instead of emotional storms tend to get things done and allow a more natural expression as presence of and as being able to face the unexpected with ease. It is a beautiful design and makes sense. The greater society as this earth should be moving in this way. This is because this is how one builds things. There is really no reason for any friction in our lives other than to show where we have lost a certain inner balance and effective focus - and/or the time to resolve any tension and friction because the solution is always in plain sight. What thwarts that conflict is a loss of direct seeing as consideration of all things, to realize what is best for all. That sense in itself would build a self confidence that is happy to be here in this life. 

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to, as my beingness, as my innocence to  not see realize and understand that I live in a practical PHYSICAL reality that is always present all around me here and is me here, therefore the means to order, as respect, as build, as express with and as is in plain sight, here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see realize and understand, as my beingness, as my innocence, to realize when and as I allow myself to scatter, as spread out, as separate from being present here, walking the small to realize the more complex, here, as this living breathing, physical reality called life on earth.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that I am the most perfect of forms composed of the physical building blocks of life, here to see realize and understand with every step and every breath, the ordinary movement/expression/direction that enables me to not only understand this life, but also make the choice that is in consideration of all things, respecting who and what I am here, to be focused and realizing the path of least resistance to realize the simple that composes the more complex as this life on earth here.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that when and as I find myself being in that “ quality” of and as feeling scattered, it is an indication that I am  spread out, as spaced out, as lacking in being focused and present here, to respect all things, taking the good and realizing what causes no harm as this is what I would want for myself, especially as a child born onto this earth here, this practical, physical, living breathing reality that is life in expression as it should be.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand, as my beingness, as my innocence, that this state of being that has this quality of being scattered, is myself needing more information, or moving into more investigation to see, realize and understand that simple steps that lead to understanding the more complex, to generate a greater ease of movement, that by its nature, generates more ease, as joy, and as such, self confidence, here, to equalize to life which is physical and breathing, and living here, and ever present as life in expression is physical as it should be!

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that when and as I move into comparison in self interest alone, I am scattering myself into beliefs, opinions and ideas, instead of realizing the qualities of expression as being a math, that is a gift to understand and compose what lends greater paths of least resistance to open doors/dwors as insight into unfolding what is natural as being present here in this life, as life is physical and practical and ever in expression here, all around me, thus there is no such thing as being alone, as I am you in another life, as life is a fabric that is all one, here in plain sight. 

I commit myself to slowing down and breathing, to cross reference inner accepted and allowed habits, to recognize when and as I am becoming/being “ scattered”  to find that point of least resistance, that will most likely have a quality of grace, as that movement that allows one to move through the eye-of-the-needle into realizing the small, as investigating what is here, to sense the more complex and order in ways and means that move with ease, here in synch with this living breathing physical earth/life-in-expression.

Tuesday, July 2, 2019

Day 826 A Program of Separation

This morning, while picking up something in a store, I ran into a cousin of mine. As we greeted one another I suddenly found myself in a shadow world. It happens so fast, yet is recognizable! This is how sensitive are we Human BEINGS/BEINGNESSES! 
My cousin’s mother is the sibling of my father ( duh ). As my cousin spoke general pleasantries, their arms moved in a certain way. I found myself looking at my father, for a split second, or perhaps even shorter. After all, children who have already built some vocabulary and had some stability at a younger age, can ALREADY process information within a 200 millisecond  advantageous difference to those children absorbing/becoming their environment in a more chaotic environment ! Within the law of compounding effects, that 200 millisecond difference accumulates to being a great separation in terms of dealing with the information around us as adults.

Really slow down and let that sink/synch in.

Breath. Slow WAY down.

As well, I can see where the state one is in in the childhood years can become so automated, one would most likely not be able to pin-point it. This can be visible here, in this situation with my cousin. The outcome may be a general emotional response and then a whole conversation about those that are no longer here, perhaps becoming a momentary chat of reminiscence. This very state of being, so normalized that we cannot remember how we came to behave this way as we entertain ourselves in a shadow world of ideas, beliefs and opinions, defining us, as selling/celling our experiences as storied information.

I must ask myself, if I know the practiced sequences that are telling in the very way that relative moved their arms would I change the narrative? Each and every tension and “ pull” of experiences that are a consequence of beliefs determine that movement. That movement is like a novel. It tells a story. It is not the real living story of this earth. It is a state of practiced separation from creation, as this living physical reality. The tension reflects the degree of lack-of-real-presence in the very way the body moves. It has a quality of lacking a certain grace. The absence of which would not lead to conversations of reminiscing about the past, because the incredible ability of creation as those very arms, would reflect just that, creation. It would be more, I can imagine, like being in total awe of simply being an expression. That would require no reminiscing about the past. 

I could see where, were I have to remained within the personification of values/tensions/belief/opinions, how I would have played a dia-LOGUE of my family constructions of values, beliefs, opinions, where not all is “ bad” yet still, stilling, as a limited form of information that appears a comfort zone because it is known and socially accepted - and YET, ignorant of the physical realty where there is an increase in species extinction if one considered the greater stage of all things. 

I am caught in that SPELL as the personification, for a moment, and with a practice of cross reference within me, suddenly see what I have just used as a FOCUS within myself. I see, that shadow of values that is a “ mirage” like “ film” around my relative, as the information directing physical movement. It does visibly have an ever so slight movement around the form. One can sense it as one can sense a breeze.

I spoke of this out loud, this sudden sense of this body of information directing the movements of my cousin around their body. This triggered a desire to reminisce, evident in the desire to continue a conversation. Thankfully, we were interrupted as another acquaintance appeared on the scene. Yet, that split second moment- one that reminded me of that day when my son came home from school and all I could see was the “ music,” the “ math” of his teacher emanating from within him.  If I know and sense the shadow world, others must too. Some/many, cannot speak of it, most likely because it has become suppressed. lol, we spend a HUGE amount of our lives suppressing ourselves! Most likely, because we fear speaking up about what we see and soon it is buried in memory and we cannot remember - because we have practiced, as mastered, pushing things away. I mean, we are amazing machines, we become what we practice.  It is not supernatural, it is awesome! It is normal. It is the mis-use of this that builds the abnormal. It is not normal to suppress a natural ability to SEE what has been accepted and allowed and practiced in self and another. After all, what is self mastery, of anything? How does one master an instrument - THE SAME WAY! One practices the small, and then can expeditiously process the practiced information, to the extent one “ reads” this in a split second to then play that beautiful song with ease. What happens in a home where a child absorbs this very thing in parents? We become what is within our environments, as that is called opportunity. 

I was interacting with a potential client the other day, when I had to stop. They were no longer hearing anything I was saying. They were very very busy attempting to deconstruct and reconstruct within them-self’s/ lol - themselves ( their multiple personalities!). I could see they were not focused here. In a way, that “ veil’ is in the way and it is as though one can only reach the person through this veil of automated belief and a mis-use of self as life, suppressing self as life! We spend an incredible ability suppressing ourselves as life. This in itself means we have great capacity! And, it reveals what a “ right “ practice could do for anyone. Our words can indeed change our DNA. 

This was so visible. I was too astounded at seeing the same “ film” around them, which I believe is described in the Christian story of and as the “ Techno-Colored” dream coat! I stopped to slow down and breath. I could go no further, because it would not be heard. Here, it is to speak up of this, use stories, go back and walk everything that has been stated, to place a more stable scaffold - because this allows one to more effectively process what is being framed and lend a stability to hold this overall, to the extent it is remembered enough to cross-reference in moments to come. And, within this, to realize the extent of my own ignorance, as I can only speak from my own experience - an experience that is the same in all men, around me, yet of differing measure and color, and values. When it is said that humans are walking in a dream, we indeed are. This mastery of lack, evident in species extinction and pollution, indicates the degree to which we are no-longer in synch with creation as life, as the physical expression HERE. 

One aspect of this, is realizing emotional reactions. The degree and intensity of emotional response, most probably has a direct correlation to the distance from that innocence of the child that is more the real self as life!  - that state BEFORE a “ dream coat” as the shadow of values that include active self suppression automates. 

The very degree of intensification signifies the degree of difference from the self-as-life-expression. It is similar, and exposed in the Movie the Blade Runner.  The very “ humanoid” robots are discovered through being asked questions about their past. When the questions move beyond the program of their story, the information of their programmed story, the machine begins to become more and more agitated because it is attempting to find the information in its filing system to answer the questions. The robot begins to move into attack mode. In the “ reality” or “ frame “ of this movie, that increasing agitation is the sign of that human-looking object to in fact be a robot. Yet, in our society today, we have the same thing. Only it is in humans. It is that human that lacks the kind of inner structure, to NOT ONLY self realize, BUT ALSO, or simultaneously, READ what is moving and expressing in the fabric of the reality that is the means to express the lack or an awareness of what is here! 

I mean, can I read every single little movement that built the way the arms of my relative moved that I recognized as being the same music/math/expression/superimposed-fantastic-personality? Can I take apart that composition and see the essence of and as the real living “ life” as a starting point behind that wall of information that is a shadow indicating accepted practices and values? This, it self, a  HUGE DISTRACTION that when collectively allowed as humanity, leading to a mis-use of freely given resources causing massive species extinction AND dis-ease in mankind because ultimately, ease IS being in synch WITH earth as creation? 

I want to imagine that each human realizes this, and we begin to deconstruct this and SEE this in ourselves and others. We begin to FORGIVE this, with every breath, helping one another as we recognize our shadow world, and step outside of our bubbles- get out of an over-use of the imagination and LIVE. We most likely would be astounded and at the same time HAVE GREAT FUN in calling our “ measures” out by name, and realizing our unique potentials as life, and begin to manifest that expression to the extent when we are meeting someone, we see a expression that OPENS the incredible awesomeness of creation as life that is physical. It would mean the removal of anxiety. It would mean the removal of tension. It would mean we would live in GREAT JOY, seeing, respecting the very smallest of movement, like when we enjoy the most subtle of breezes! 

We can do this. The children who are coming, are us in another life. What would you have wanted for yourself, to become a frustrated anxious shadow self or never-have-lost that innocence where this life was so amazing it was something to be incredibly joyful about? Do you remember that? It is there under the storm. It cannot be destroyed because is it life in expression. It can remain very very tiny, as perhaps only ONE WORD. The resonant storm appears HUGE, and yet it is only a shadowy movement. What is real is the PHYSICAL. Have a look, what is constantly “ owned” behind paper-castle walls but freely given and natural resources? What is “ owned” and moved with constant ease while the media says they cannot get aid to those same “ remote” areas that have a constant flow of resource extraction? It is all a lie. The system, reflects what each and every human being has allowed. 

Should someone mince their words about this? No. To do so is to be afraid of seeing what has been allowed. It also, has the quality of being curious about how something has been allowed. I realize this, because I was so interested in the differences between cultures. I wanted to participate and be involved in the various cultures. That is being curious for the shadow world- and it is/comes at the expense of this earth, this reality. It is as enticing as any creation would be, even if it was the opposite of creation as that mathematical personification of ideas, beliefs and opinions. One must realize this state-of-separation in the self. 

This means, rebuilding each word. This means practicing this every day, a little bit. This means recognizing emotional reactions and triggers, that are unstable because memories are unstable- they have no real constancy because they are spinning within themselves attempting to remain despite their instability because they have no real standing. It means forgiving as deconstructing this “ personlity” that we absorb as children to survive because all the adults before us are caught in this seemingly invisible web that becomes invisible through a practice of suppression that is self-practice automating and is visible! 

I would say, recognizing this is similar to swimming in a body of water that has differing temperatures. Meaning, in one moment the water is slightly colder, and the next, as one swims, slightly warmer. The physical machine is an incredible sensor! The degree to which we have practiced self suppression is most likely to the degree of suppression we have practiced and most probably visible in the slightest of movements of one’s arm- for example. 

Watch the media, and realize the extent of the hype! Realize the extent to which things are repeated again and again and again, with hyper-polarization for values, creating friction between two parties! That is what is informing that movement of that arm, easily triggering more of the same. Some we recognize and then participate within, feeling a false good that is really just more self validation of self definitions for survival as this of which I speak in a system that is of this same thing, so visible in the slow destruction of earth’s resources being abused and “ owned.”

This “ energetic” storm is “ like” a wind. It is visible, it is sensed and used, yet the crime of it is suppressed as practiced, therefor it will take a consistent and concerted effort to deconstruct this false “ god” and come back down to earth, to birth self as life here. 

It must be realized, there is nothing fantastic about this, it is not something to fear. It is practical and visible. Who and what we are as life, in our physical states are the most exquisite of sensory machines. Any longing we have within is to realize the life within us is occupied by this shadow.As has been said for eons, one must come to realize the shadow itself. What is simple is how we work, what is complicated is a mis-use of how we work! Thus, any time one says something is complicated, it means they do not YET understand this.

I can use this to realize when I must slow down and investigate. If things are beginning to appear “ complicated” I am too much in my own shadow world, and or, must investigate reality. 

Thus, I can use my own accepted and allowed state-of-separation, to realize my own accepted and allowed romanticized stories and come back down to earth. This becomes my practice, and I discover myself here, and how this works, finding myself no longer reacting as limited information. I am able to be present here, and build presence, and uncover what is of awesomeness and creation in real expression here. 

It is all a math. And that is really cool. A mis-use of resources, as causing harm in any way, shape or form, is an abuse of life. Life as creation is physical. 

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself, as my beingness, as my innocence, for separating myself from who and what I really am as life, that same essence of and as me, as a word, that has accepted and allowed a limited value system to define who and what I am, as I accepted this in fear, to survive, as this was what existed for eons, and is what is mis-using the physical resources that composed this life in expression here.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself , as my beingness, as my innocence, to see realize and understand that the one thing that is demonized is the physical while, all the while, it is the one thing moved to be owned, by words on a piece of paper revealing what is life in itself as that actions.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand, as my beingness as my innocence, to realize the extent to which I de - man myself through believing nature and the physical is somehow “ bad.”

I forgive myself, as my beingness, as my innocence, for not seeing realizing and understanding how much being in a state of doom and gloom s a distraction from myself, and a belief that the physical is somehow a bad, when the physical is life in expression here.

I forgive myself as my beingness, as my innocence for not seeing, realizing and understanding how so many narratives assume the human as being bad, which they are as a state of separation from investigating what causes no harm, abusing freely given resources that are the very means of expression as life, which is physical here, and how the present economic system, that is configured to extract resources in ways that cause harm and disregard for nature, have a starting point that the human is evil, when the human is accepted and allowed programming of self interest, believing a shadow self, moving in slippery-fish ways and means a memory, is more than reality, when it is the opposite.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself as my beingness, as my innocence for not seeing, realizing and understanding, my ability to sense this, as the exquisite ability of life, as the physical to sense all things, and as the innate ability of and as this, to sense my own accepted and allowed survival suit of limited values, that are of hyper polarized value judgements- practiced again and again, reminding me, in every moment, of a mastery of lack, as limited values used to define me, to the extent I isolate myself from life here, as who and what I really am.

I forgive myself, as my beingness, as my innocence, for not allowing and accepting myself to self realize myself as life, within and as realizing the direct relationship of the degree of my state of separation in regards to the extent to which I speak, as express, as energy, inherent in my words, as blame and spite, righteousness and condemnation, that which I have practiced, making myself visible in regards to the degree to which I justify my separation from life, as the experience of blame, hiding the shame as the sham of me, as personality, as energy, from living all that respects all things, as movement that causes no harm, here. 

I commit myself, as my beingness as my innocence to slowing down and breathing to seeing realizing and understanding the extent to which I as life, have created a huge but tiny, projection of beliefs, opinions and ideas, of charged and polarized values, to define me, evident in every word I speak, and as a consequence in every movement I make, within this physical body, revealing myself to myself, where the extent to which I project criticism and blame, spite and righteousness, is the degree to which I have separated myself from being present here, equal and one to life that is the physical as creation here.

I commit myself to slowing down and realizing the shadow world of belief, is like a suit, swirling around as what has been allowed to inform myself as life, as the physical is an abuse of life, consuming the natural resources as the composition of earth as the physical here, where myself as life, expresses with the physical as my mind, beingness and physical self, here, all composed of the expression of life, that in reality moves in ways I would call of absolute purpose, realizing no harm and creating balance and expression as that which supports all life.

I commit myself, as my beingness, as my innocence, to see realize and understand that this shadow self cannot define who and what I am unless through acceptance, and that this in itself has been going on for eons compounding as practice, up to this point as earth, thus, it is to realize this and turn the tide to synch equal and one with and as creation as who and what I am here.