I had a moment yesterday where a woman arrived while I was working with a child. The child was taking an assessment and the woman came and called out her name from a distance. I went and said to the woman that the child would be done in a moment. The woman reacted.
Yet she turned away and stopped calling out to the student. I paused for a moment and then went up to her. I apologized for coming up and with the means to ask her to stop. She said some words to me, in a quiet temper. I then agreed with her.
I could see her quiet down. It is like embracing something and not reacting to it, believing that it is an indication of me in any way.
I also noticed that there was some fear in me, because I did not want the woman to be angry with me, my fear was that she would remain in ill will. Also, I did have the thought that her reaction was over the top. Yet while these things were moving slightly within me, I placed myself her in shoes and in an understanding of how insecure we can get about ourselves.
Before I can change, I have to admit what it is that I am. This means slowing down and assessing outside of a reaction. For me, it was to calm the waters, so-to-speak, no matter what.
Within this process, as I agreed with the woman, I could see the ‘ sound’ of her, the tenor of her change. It was watching a demeanor move into calm, the storm quickly calming.
I also spent time with a boy in a state of spite. The moment he went into any fear he went into spite. Everything “sucked” for him. Many times within working with him, he would become calm, quiet down, and move forward. The absence of spite within him, revealed a very gentle and willing person. That gentle person was much more receptive than the reactive person who had begun, for reasons I cannot fathom in exact detail, to practice spite, again and again.
Within all of this, it makes it obvious that we become what we practice. What we practice, in measure, as belief about the world around us, is what we become. Hence, we all learn the same way, we learn through repeating what we use as a measure, and a belief is a measure. Again, this is why the media repeats the same information again and again, a story that is a lie by omission. And because we as humans, absorb, which is how we take in measure in all ways, so it is quantum, if we take in a measure and repeat, to understand it , and we do not investigate the measure, or, place it into a real life context, we become that.
In this, our greatest gift becomes our greatest weakness. And that gift enables us to assess what we have accepted and change it. And that ability to change, can be used to assess the world around us because this is our absorbent ability that is the same as our ability to assess. Thus, nothing can define us, but what we accept and allow.
Overall, this is why self forgiveness in every moment to and towards all energetic reactions, as emotions and feelings, is so important. This is why being patient until the waters calm, and the person becomes soft, in and as gentle and open, willing to change, is necessary to get to a starting point that can and will move as what is best for all, because ultimately, that greatest gift is by nature a willing participant in life as this is the real value.