Monday, October 20, 2014

Day 581 The gift of Self Forgiveness

I notice as I step out and talk with people that I have so often not listened to the words the other speaks, as I have allowed myself to judge them based on how they dress, the way in which they use their words, the mannerisms they move as while they speak.
I can become so occupied with their physical mannerisms and the way they use their words, and the way they dress that I do not pay attention to the words they are using. Meaning I am not paying attention to the words in such a way that I look at where they are coming from, as in where they are in their ability to express themselves, which is their reflection of understanding of the world in which they live, a physical world..
To “ listen” through what is being said where I look to that which is sorting through various layers of constructs used to present themselves in and as , I have to slow way down and listen to more than what is projected outward.
If my own reactions come up, than I am lost, and chaos ensures, nothing really being resolved. Later, I go back and try to see where I lost a connection, where I lost focus and went into judgement , because this is really what I have done: gone into judgement, which is comparison based on values - limited ones at that, all of which is moving into inferiority in relation to physical existence - HUEmans are filled with color, and that color is not in common sense of the physical practical reality.. Normally, within this paranormal imaginative scenario,  I would then use more justification in addressing feeling lousy by comparison ( jealousy) to make myself believe that I am superior and that the disconnect was the fault of the other which is becoming spiteful and vindictive. The fault does not remain with the other, as what has been the lack of connection is an acceptance of non-understanding, as an acceptance of an idea about how and why something us, without really looking at what it would mean to move in ways that allow physical reality to function, especially in an age where all educational research says that the more words we know, the more capable we are as people, as we have the means to construct understanding and focusability on and  about things to enable us to connect with others and become directive in common sense ways.  .
Ironically we learn to use our imaginations not in the order of communicating with one another, to be able to hold a construct of another as the words they use to become equal in understanding, instead we develop imagination to hold fantasies and then run around and compare these and judge them, like a fashion. I mean, even within this we are divided, as we separate into factions of imagination, as some are bound by fashion only, or reading books only, etc. etc. and then within this we remain within very limited frameworks, so busy - like an imagination that buzzes with our occupations ( that are not “ bad” per say, but limited) that we no longer realize the imagery projection is a superstition, a paranormal event, that can be used to allow connection and cross reference, so that we understand one another and work in ways that allow the physical life we exist as to flow creatively with ease, as this is how life should be.
But, at present, humans are as what we manifest, which is conflict and violence and war, raping the physical world in order to stand as a winner saying , my imagination picture show is more than yours. We do/allow this to such an extent that anything that does not support this picture show as mind, is less than we are, is less than worthy of life. And, we blame that which is not “ dressed up” as mental imagery as us as being in a state of lack, where we then play an end game, so caught in competition/comparison that moving into what solves conflict/separation is not considered.  This is a game that has an outcome of destroying the means of creation, where we will end up looking back and realizing we turned everything into dust instead of really being creation, instead of really being life.
And, yes this varies, but it also explains the separation and the disconnect as each individual person on the ground and the consequence of a few pissing their beliefs all over the media, to sustain their ideological imaginative constructions. So, what they are doing is what we are all doing.
So, in order for me to become the very change I speak of, I have to slow way down and really begin to listen to others. This means, becoming humble towards what another says. It means as someone once said, “ walking through the valley of the shadow of good and evil.” not fearing, not reacting, not rejecting or accepting, but in essence listening, hearing the very sound of the person, and the sparks of separation being projected outward that cannot harm me, ( most of the time as those in Gaza, the children especially, cannot escape)  unless I accept and allow them to become more than what is practically here, as the physical from which the imaginative abstract as mind is built onto. In breath, I can remain here, and become aware of more than the ideological picture show as my mind, fanned into existence through my own separation from common sense. And common sense is the real natural state of myself when I am accepting of the physical, as in moving with the physical in ways that do not harm, as it pays attention to physical reality, and realizes that belief, opinion are constructs of the imagination, here. 
I move, in every breath, in self forgiveness of what separations I have accepted and allowed as mind, these parts not to be judged, but brought back down to earth, to allow myself to become the gift of life, which is a self forgiveness in accepting the physical as me, in common sense of all life, which is to be here, as I as a physical life in expression can only live here. Thus, I forgive myself for allowing and accepting a mind construction to become more than life itself,  life being which includes all that is here, as the physical.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself as life to walk with the physical as being equal and one with and as me, as what I am, the eye-of-the-needle to become equal and one with and as life, to build heaven on earth, as life should be.

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