The Caregiver Archetype
Placing value in being needed by others.
This has been character that I have been aware of for some time. I realize that this is not being self responsible, it is seeking meaning through being needed by others. It is character picked up from my mother. It involves worrying about others and where they are within themselves.
This is myself wanting to fix what is going on in others, as my immediate family and friends etc., ironically focusing on them to make sure they are moving in ways that support them. It is being a mother as I define it, instead of focusing on being responsible myself.
It is like having something to worry about to give myself purpose.
Yet it is not really a purpose, because it is not myself modeling being practical in respect of physical reality to enable self responsibility to be what is developed. Instead it is an act of self interest. It is avoiding being present here and being self responsible, I am in effect avoiding being myself, and being responsible as life as who and what I really am. It is as though I have no real faith in life. I am the one accepting this, as no one can be this for me, only I can.
It also means that I must look at how I am fearing to really stand up and be real, be present, respect all that is here. This would mean stepping out of this role, and naturally causing conflict with what has been accepted and allowed on this earth, that is so visible all around, which is a lack of accepting respect for this actual real world, as the physical in the face of others as the society of men who have moved in self interest, instead of being themselves as life which is to be and do what is best for all.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to hide from being self responsible within and as believing that worrying about my children, or what is going on in the world, as something that gives me meaning, or purpose, when this is an abdication of myself as life, an abdication of respect for and as life here, as life is physical, and practical, mathematical, thus it is more to model and live this respect to allow others to become practical through what it is that I focus upon as what is real, as the physical.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to separate myself from myself as life as the presence of myself here, naturally able as life to respect the physical and live the practice of being physical which is a practice of being practical and focused in common sense of reality, as the physical here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that being a caregiver is being in respect of the physical and the practical nature of living as being physical as that which is right here in front of me, and is me, equal and one here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see realize and understand that being life, that caring for life, means paying respect as in focusing here, considering all things and being present as focused equal and one with and as the physical, where each and every human being can practice in common sense of what is here, realizing, as self realizing what is best for all, which is what is best for self, thus it is for myself to express the care of being present here, which is being myself, where as this there is no need to seek meaning as I am life, as the physical here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to abdicate myself as life, as placing value in being needed by others, which is a separation from being in common sense of what is real, as what is right in front of me as the physical world here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that within and as thinking about caring for another, I am in effect allowing a belief that I am stronger than others and causing myself to become a state of worry and fear about them, not seeing realizing and understanding that I am also believing them to be weak, which is focusing on weakness instead of being present here, in the practice of being life, as this is a physical world where the real care is to be present and in respect of the practical common sense of a visible physical world that is built in common sense practical ways, the gift of life, something that can be understood.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to separate myself from being focused here, as this appears to be difficult when in reality this is the gift of life to be understood to accept creation and to enjoy creation here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that in placing myself in being a care giver, I am accepting a belief that I am stronger and another is weaker, a value judgement, which is a fear of being myself here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to pity others, which is a lack of presence in equality and oneness in respect of the practical that is the physical world around me, a nature that moves as solution to and towards the rewards being life in expression.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to pity others, as this is a separation from living common sense of the physical.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that in worrying about another, I am not here, present and focused on the practice of life, as the physical.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to call what is here by name, and in so doing, call the respect of life, in and as every word I speak here, to sound what is real, and thereby model life, to self empower through the focus of who and what I am, as life, here, where being myself as life, reverberates as who and what I am, where the living and being of and as this is clear so that what is expressed is life and what is attended to is life, where what I am as what I do is life in every moment, as this presence and focus is shared as who and what I am here as the natural ability to absorb what is here, and express respect for what is here as the physical, is visible, as being self responsible for and as life here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become a behavior of worrying about others.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to pity others, not seeing realizing and understand that this is myself believing that I am stronger than another, which is being a belief within myself, and not myself being focused here, in respect of what is life in expression, that is mathematical and of and as common sense here.
I forgive myself for not seeing realizing and understand that being present here, as the focus of myself is a practical movement, in respect of the physical, which means being the practice of respecting the formation of life as the physical.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to use the guise of care to place value in being needed by others.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to pity.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to worry about others, to worry about my children, to worry about people in my life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to connect care to worry.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to define care within worry.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to separate myself from the word care and from worry through defining care within worry in separation from myself .
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to abdicate myself as life, through creating a value around caring for others as what I allow to define me, in separation from respecting life.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that within and as the limited value system, I accepted and allowed myself to become a character of care to give myself value, as I accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to others within a narrow means of self interest in survival, and defined myself as not being pretty enough, and within this self pity, I then project this outwards to avoid seeing myself’s own limited accepted and allowed value judgements, to avoid being practical here, as in standing through the storm of this as what men have accepted and allowed, where I was a child, and instead of being practical in common sense of all life as who and what I am and the means that absorbed the limited value system.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting a belief that I lacked in one value which was a starting point of judgement, and choose another to define who and what I am, all within and as a fear of being practical and respectful of all life, understanding form and function of what is a physical life in formation here as this earth.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that within this, having accepted a belief that ‘ I am not pretty enough’ which is a separation from being practical here, as a physical being, I accepted and allowed a limited value system.
I forgive myself for not seeing realizing and understanding that within and as allowing this judgement I believed in limited values and moved into survival before life, seeking to survive/profit from values in separation from the practice of who and what I am, as a physical life information.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand such a separation would lead to confusion and bewilderment in self directing self in ways that cause no harm to myself and others, on this physical, practical and mathematical world that is life information.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that as a child, as myself as life, I absorbed the life that was around me, as my parents, and within this, practiced what I measured as what I was exposed to, and believed this to be more real than the physical.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand the mis-takes on reality as the physical, accepting and allowing value judgements to define who and what I am would do, and in following these value judgements, absorbed from my mother, and the adults around me, I separated from practical common sense of who and what I am as a physical beingness, and through this allowance became the consequence of and as bewilderment when I allowed limited values to direct me that lead to an absence of respect for the physical world leading to mistakes on reality.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand the consequence of accepting limited values as beliefs about who and what I am as I move into this narrow focus as ideas about a good and bad, specifically as a belief that I am not pretty enough and choosing another value as ' care' to define who and what I am, a false positive as this is a guise to be ' good' in order to survive when overall this is an abdication of myself as life.
To be continued. Thank you for reading!
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