Day 818 Everything is a system. What is regret, pressure, and " no-force" ?

The issue of regret comes up at times. Yet, regret like procrastination is a distraction if held onto for too long. This becomes a self definition that is about the past, being projected in front of one, consuming the attention of one, that in itself once reviewed, remediated and corrected in terms of what would change a similar outcome in one’s actions, can become in itself a means to realize a state of separation from living. Living means to be here, because this physical creation is what is real, is what remains, is what continues beyond the self. The physical is creation manifest, it shows what works and what does not work. Therefore, attention is here. Doing things manifests here, as the physical. Is it not ironic that religion suggests, because that is all it can do, that there is something more? Being the suggestion of a more, without practical physical, directing focus HERE, is an illusion. One has become a relationship, a relating, to an idea created as built as imaged within. The perfect storm of control. We are happy when we are focused, completely, and doing. This has a movement of problem solving, as one is focused here. Not the best thing to promote if one wants control, or wants to play a god, or guru, or statism. This game is ultimately an illusion. 

Lately, I have had the idea swirling around within me, that instead of having what we call religion, as churches, the form of the state will become a replacement religion. This will be some invisible hand, fist, entity, that passes down determinations that the state workers will then relay, taking no responsibility for a compliance lacking in common sense of living physical reality because some guru/god/invisible-hand voice from some far off “ state” passed a set of words on a page that must be followed, and it is not my fault as I make sure all the lines on a piece of paper are properly filled in. This, a focus in a petrie-dish office distant from what is living. The goal to generate income for that pension, despite the consequences on the ground.  This, overall, an imposed entity construction determining outcomes that someone else somewhere else must change. All the while, this whole thing is made up of people. It is the collective in compliance without common sense that holds such things in place. And, as in Detroit, it can all be taken away, in a moment.  This is the hard way. It need not be this way.  When realized, the regret at following without practical investigation of the “ rulings” as measures embraced and “ handed” down via anonymous notes as words-on-a-page ONLY from a air-conditioned office ( telling in itself , remember petrie-dish environments) is not real living, and will lead to regret, potentially colored with a self pity of and as “ I did what I was told.” If we, each one, wake up, this would not exist, this compliance without investigation. And it need not exist, as I have found that often such words as “ may” are in the documents, meaning it is not suggested that one HAS to follow the dictates of the state. I saw such in the State educational words; basically, the townships can do what ever they want. Of course, the funding may not come through unless one uses the guidelines. If we look, that which is funded, is most probably not what is best. It is similar to the devil smiling. One must be given choice, because that places liability on the bottom, but the caveat is that to get this, which is an “ order” promoted/suggested ONLY, one must comply with the offerings. If one is not in a mode of common sense, and self responsibility, the storm of suggestion appears to be a more. That “ more” though coupled with “ good,” is the illusion that when followed, will lead one down the road of regret. That regret can then become a further distraction from stepping into common sense, the place of real doing, of making the choice to be self responsible, to develop awareness and presence, the kind that lend a direct focus on reality, where things get done, where one finds instead of anxiety, real happiness. This is the place where one discovers a sensibility to create. This is where one really lives, here. Let’s call it here ness, which sounds like hear-ness. This, would engage all the senses. I wonder if one could say that when all the senses are properly engaged, if that “ heart” opens up and begins to flow? Is this that has been hidden in plain sight all along, as simple as the physical body being in a synchronicity of focused engagement that opens up that heart - which spells “ earth.”? Is this simplicity and as such release, in contrast to the emotional/feeling storm of ideas, beliefs, and opinions, as a resonant construct within, something that was always here outside of the anxiety of chaos held in place through this absence of proper use of the physical manifestation of one’s self as life here? I mean, there is nothing wrong with chaos, it is simply a moment of deconstruction and reconstruction, that when done properly, would express a graceful transformation!  As humanity, we have rebuilding to do.

Obviously, perhaps, there are some so far down a rabbit whole of constructed division from real presence, that to justify that means to define the whole through that extreme, is more of the same game. In reality, -most likely, percentage wise - a greater number would choose to change into being present and focusing here, being real as a doing that will lead to happiness. The test of worst case scenario being made larger than life, is a part of an inner resonant storm of ideas. beliefs, and opinions, and will be projected by the “ state” of who stands to lose such ideas, beliefs, and opinions holding a currency of more for them at the expense of life. We are happy when we are focused and creating, and unhappy when we are not. Survival is a game of surreptitious vivacity, or superstitious seeming vivaciousness that is like a bling of a more, when that is the means of separation from being present, utilizing one’s common sense, which is sensing here. If we are able to read resonant shadows, our sensibilities must be so incredibly awesome, it is a wonder we do not realize that the full employment of them would be fulfilling, and so revealing of the incredible mechanism of creation that is the self equal and one with all that is here, that shows in its very expression that living self.  Just look at children. Before they become limiting personifications of ideas, beliefs and opinions, they learn more quickly, which means they have a greater presence. What is lost is what is more natural. Look to being in a state of urgency. That is like a raging train that can no longer see the total landscape, which is a state of appearing to be moving, but in fact is a slowing down done through accepting definition of limited information. Schools are a raging train. Such can be touted as a good, when in effect, they are the cause of greater attention disorders, which are cognitive disorders, which are mental disorders, which are the fault of the parents, because the parents experience that child before a resonant chaos of ideas, beliefs and opinions, become a projected entity from within, that has lost its presence in reality. I should know, I am a parent. I see the ideas I passed down, through acceptance from my parents, most probably for seven generations. I can blame no one but myself, and must become proactive, instead of allowing such self pitying generations to define this as that is not being the model of being present, of being the change necessary to never allow this to happen again, to not inhibit the potential of sensing the most subtle of things, the living things that are always, here, in all ways.

Real focus is making the choice to always be present, living a movement of constant cross reference to what is here, which is a movement of forgiving one’s self to what is here, respecting this physical reality, because it is life. This is a transformation out of ego, which is a mind consciousness of ideas, beliefs and opinions made larger than all things. If one accepts that state job, for example, one looks here, and only accepts that which causes the least harm - given what has been accepted - before one chooses revenue generation, for example. We all know this, and because of this there is no excuse. One knows when one makes excuses, as it always has the color of regret. That regret compounds, because what we practice, as what we allow, compounds as this is how a mastery of something also happens. One can master denial, or one can master real doing. To master real doing, one remains focused with presence, sensing what is here. Even I can notice a dog that is not moving because I suddenly realize it is blind, and because of the ensuing evening light, has suddenly lost seeing, and perhaps has a slower response time because that dog must learn to employ other senses yet unmastered, and therefor as an appear-ingly delayed response time. This indicates that we live in a huge magnificent orchestrated expression of life, where we are the most prefect math to sense this reality. It is only blocked by resonant ideas, beliefs and opinions. 

Within this, what I have learned is that every limitation of and as this, will be faced, and must be walked through.  And will be faced many many times. Acceptance of that, and one grows in faith in terms of business within this. The limitations no longer something to fear as they are signifiers of that urgency called energy and actually lend solution. We can live without ego. We can live without this resonant inner state of separation from living reality.  The physical is life in expression and what is most real. 

I remember a master cellist telling me that in order to perform in a quartet, one must have absolutely no ego. Otherwise, it cannot be done. And yet, when in real focus, in real doing, as performing, that moment of no ego, when the four are focused and present, is when the greatest joy happens. We are happy when we are focused and unhappy when we are not. Our words must become living words. Each small word redefined, refocused into this living reality, equal and one. 

Have you become a master of blame or a master of self as creator as life? Our words should be natural, as living words. This directing our incredible sensitivity as life, to be focused here, to open our hearts to reflecting creation, as life, as the physical.  It is a focus that has no quality, or value of urgency. It is lacking of the rejection of life, as the weight of regret. Real focus lacks that raging weight of limitation. Focus has its own “ pressure” in relation to what is here as ego. Focus lacks forcing something. We all know this, as we have all had moments of calm and the joy of forgiving that is that allowance of discovery. We need only employ that to all moments in our lives, to never have regrets because we lived a full employment of life as respecting all things because they are us in another life, by definition. 

Real focus lacks a pressure. It has no “ force.” One can practice that measure of focus, every day, in the small, rebuilding, to position one’s self in hearing here! It is to master the small with correct definition to realize the more complex when it appears as one expands in awareness. Yet, one must realize one’s separations and practice walking the deconstruction of them, to realize the patterns one has mastered as that resonant storm of ideas, beliefs, and opinions, and at the same time, embrace a natural ability to focus here and learn, which is the expansion of one’s awareness as the self as life. 

What is Presence? Day 807

The point of least resistance, the point of moving forward, the place of where I am at.

As what and who I am, I can always deconstruct and reconstruct. I can feel what I carry with me, as a morality of good and bad, instead of what is best for all, as what considers all things here, in this reality, a physical reality, as life, as this is what defines me, gives me license to express that/this life, here. 

Somehow, even these words do not express this. It can only be about what this means. This means of composition that functions as well, as a means of communication. I remember moments, especially when in a musical performance, at a certain point, of and as “ knowing where a person was at” in terms of personal mastery of an instrument. It is that one can remember the sequences of development into greater mastery.  If those one performs with, are in the same levels, of this understanding of the parts that lead to the more wholistic integration, there can be a sense of knowing that does not need communication as words. It is seeing where someone is at. It is an awesome point, because it is the place where one begins to realize the extent one can play with the sound and at the same time be in synch with the other performers. Each sees what the other is doing, and the other helps one to form and move, to express. 

I remember other times of the sense of “ knowing” coming up. It is as though one is open, and showing the sequences and how one is moving in this reality, as the means of expression. I would say it is of a presence more than a race to project something outward. I remember this happening at other times, in some fantastic ways that are questionable. I would say it is, from my perspective, a use of presence. I suppose this is how I came to the point of asking myself why I had no control over being able to move into a greater presence in a self willed, at-any-moment type of self willed capacity. Perhaps I had experienced the contrast too many times and in a moment caught the difference. This lead to the question. 

I also remember, within the skill of music, moving from being able to cross reference my own movement, to then reach out to the group, practicing being aware of that - the other players- and then suddenly realizing there was an audience. After realizing the audience, because I was more secure in my own skills and being able to hear the larger group, another world opened up. Always, within expansion, which is natural, the “ new” space appears scary, like a nightmare, I did not want to look. In time, the realization that I could change my sound and it has an effect on the audience. Even within that, the realization that when I focused my sound in a certain way, people listened, as though they were drawn to the sound. I realized I had to be that of which I spoke, completely present in the sound; that was when that sound drew in greater focus. In one of my past performances, a person came to me and said I had a very strong presence on the stage. That was interesting, because I had been playing with the sound to uncover just that. We are, as humans drawn to greater presence, because on some level, we all know that what is real, is this reality, is here, as this is life and it is amazing. We enjoy being with children because they are still very engaged in this reality, even if that state of engagement, is learning to envelope an understanding of itself. 

I supposed that development of interacting as music within this reality, lead to sometimes seeing in a moment through the cracks of this reality. This, probably not always so, as a belief, because I have opened this up in my world, asking or suggesting that we all have moments where we somehow “ see through the cracks.” And, we probably, if we look, have asked the same question as to why we as individuals, are not moving as this as self willed individuals. Meaning, who are we not in control of this? How and why is there the existence of moments of greater presence, that we bounce out of without being on control of this? What is around us that we bounce back into? What has automated to the extent we have lost the self will to change into greater presence that we all know is there, because we all have those moments of presence that reveal to us that ability to have greater presence? What morality, what game of good and evil are we lost within, as value judgement of which we have been told exists, from those in the past, have we accepted that veils that ability to be more present, that moment of seeing all the interacting moving parts of this world around us? And what is that which we bounce back into? Could it be a resonant veil? And does that resonant veil block that ability to commune with another to the degree one need not speak, because one senses how present one is within what one is doing here, as an interaction with the physical to the extent one begins to “ manipulate the sound” to move what is here around one, and to have a moment where myself and another are aware of what we are doing, and that is really super fun! And, that is somehow never talked about, ever, if anything after a moment like that with another musician, there is less of a need to talk, and sense of really knowing the person, a form of intimacy that cannot be forgotten! It is better than sex in many ways, it is more use of self, unless, sexually, perhaps that is more of what is supposed to happen as the expression of touch between two people, and yet, at present, such expression has not developed presence because that same resonance within directs through a morality ( an automated beliefs system) instead of correct use of presence. 

One must really understand one’s words, to the degree one need not think about then, so that one can expand, or use to a greater degree, one’s presence, self directed, realizing the sequences of the structure of creation and the sequences of the construction of a personality that by definition is a composition of a morality of good and evil instead of a respect for all things here, realizing the beauty of creation, as this earth which is life manifest. One can see this in every micro movement of the physical body. Is there this soup of weight slowing down the presence, the potential of a human, that is visible in the most subtle of movements? Why do older people slow down so much? Why have they not mastered being present, moving with ease, here? Get on board people! We have all experienced this, we know this! It is that part of us that is that presence! The cracks of seeing through this are all around us! It is what is meant by being in a state of “ only seeing the lack” composed of the past, stitched together though value judgements of right and wrong, more than and less than, good and bad. All hate is self hate, because we know! We all have great potential, and it is here. If one does not use one’s potential as real presence as being in a relationship with this reality, and instead develops a personification of value judgements as a survival suit, that survival composition occupies one’s attention and one loses one’s potential as real presence, as being grounded here, in this reality. Then one would have moments of suddenly seeing through the cracks of one’s own construct of separation from reality. One has become stuck in a morality of good and evil value judgements instead of practical application as interaction that is relating, as being in a living relationship, to what is here. One’s relationship is with a resonant construct of managing, or trying to catch up with automated value judgements ( we become what we practice!), that unsorted that is of self interest through practice or acceptance instead of realizing that one is a part, an individual in a whole that is what one is! Presence in this living reality would enable one to move with greater effect, of which the very sound of self is equal and one to the sound of what is here as this living manifested physical reality called earth - which spells heart. The resonant shadow of ideas, beliefs and opinions, block a correct use of a natural ability to be present as who and what one is in reality. As I heard said this week, “ tyranny is the deliberate removal of nuance.” 

Have you ever been in a car accident? Have you been unnerved for a few months after the accident, having projections as “ worse case scenarios” flood your being as you drive post accident? What is that “ cloud” of fear around one? Does it take time to get over that experience and the fears associated around it? Does that occupy your focus for a while? Can you read this reality if in-volved with a past jolt of fear, or could it be considered that that experience, now a memory, a state of separation from being present and here? Could such be what may have allowed the accident as it is, that one was not aware and present and ended up in that accident? Is the fear really a wake up call to the self, to remember to live here overall? 

I hear so many parents realizing their children are extremely anxious. They blame this on the system. This blame on the system is in itself an abdication of self responsibility. One parent this week expressed this when the anxiety in the child caused the child to no longer be able to move in the system. The parent expressing a lack of awareness of this anxiety having slowly accumulated. How is it that a parent living with their child did not notice that the child was becoming increasingly anxious? Therein is the problem, the parent moving on automation to the degree they did not notice what was informing the child! That parent was “ driving down a road” and not reading what was around them. How can a school SYSTEM that by design imparts a GENERAL scaffold of information, a picture about something, of information to a group also pay attention to that same limited general scaffold being integrated effectively? They cannot be what brings that general scaffold memorized ONLY into a living wholistic experience thereby filling in that outlined in the imagination ONLY template. Having that general outlined template memorized is not an education, it is a picture in one’s imagination ONLY, and it is not the whole story. Public education works when the parents are very involved, understanding this and providing opportunity and connection to practical experience where that general scaffold comes to life, because as a picture, it has no real connection to life because it is ONLY a picture. If a human body is filled with informative general outlines about things as pictures, it becomes a knowing-of-something- that-is-not-a-real-knowing. That would by design create anxiety- not to mention the demand to memorize greater amounts of information which becomes difficult without practical experience to focus one on reality. It is also a resonant picture ONLY, that is not enough to develop real license to move effectively in this reality. Each word must have a living relationship to this reality, to allow one to be in synch with the ordinary, the reality, the nuance of the small, to be in awareness, to be able to transfer tasks into reality, practically. This is what is meant by having critical and creative thinking skills, one can transfer tasks from one environment to another with supportive effect because one have developed real presence instead of being up in an over-used imagination. The parts must be in synch. The left side of the brain moving in synch with the right side of the brain. This also begs the question as to why a parent would expect a school to do this, when they are products of the product, and by definition should have mastered this and be able to lend this state of being to the children, which would mean that perhaps, the parents would not need a school to do this. If presence, real effective self willed, self directed humans were what the parents became, than that would be absorbed by the child, because that is what is in the environment.  We are products of our environment; we are not born with language and culture or religion. 

How has this come to pass as how information is shared? Is an extreme used to compare, as some information is better than none, something is greater than nothing for an opposite extreme, and thus for some, a public school general scaffold of information memorized is more ordered than that chaos from which they came. For those above the means, that imparts this that helps the other extreme, the design actually down regulates their intelligence. This being the classic “ guise of good “ from a one sided conversation as our media, imparting a story ( a sequence of movements or events) talking effect that if one looked at the whole, would realize that singular effect of a good from an extreme starting point of lack, cannot define the collective. There is more to the story. Yet, one cannot speak up about this, because the box is only allowing certain information to come forward ( automated belief systems- one cannot speak about what one does not know, or one can only speak about one’s experience which is what one allowed and accepted ). And that story has automated to the extent one fears stepping outside of that story of information, as a totem of values made larger than life via a one-sided conversation. It is the threat of “ you are either with us, or against us” scenario. This leads to accidents, which leads to moving in shadows of doom and gloom, causing further distraction, leading to greater anxiety ( the limited story causing a mis-take on reality). This becomes that ouroborous, or a snake eating its own tail, or “ coming full circle” meaning one becomes what one thinks about, what one focuses on ( and yet the design reveals the means of effective development! ). If what eventually automates within is not in synch with the ordinary practical living physical reality around us, as being in respect of what is here and what we are, we become in conflict with living, in conflict with the practical, in conflict with the ordinary. We are in separation from the living nuance as life that is physical as that which we move to create new things, of which we are the most perfect of beings to do and to live, where we participate with one another, and create, because this is where we are most happy, being haptic, living, respecting life. Imagine being so focused here, one’s movements are creative and feeling the full nuance of creation as this reality? Imagine expanding your presence into the parts AND the whole?  The anxiety in our children is really telling/showing/revealing the degree of our separation from the ordinary that contains the nuance that informs us to become a master of this life, living self willed equality with all things, developing a real presence of and as what and who we are as physical human beings on a physical creation that is by definition amazing. Look outside your window and realize the  symmetry, the synergistic quality of creation, where no one thing is more than another, and that it is a system we can understand and move into being in greater presence with because it is us, we are a part in a wonderful fabric called life. Can we " give up" what is resonant within, or rather deconstruct and reconstruct into alignment with this life? Can we, as is our capacity, realize our point of least resistance and from there, use our presence to align to this life?

I find it interesting that we have the symbols of the triangle as the "A" and the Omega as the circle. In  moment of playing with the meaning of the totems on our papers, as the symbols, I realize the symbols in themselves reveal the means. The triangle is that which moves through the " eye-of-the-needle" as the "O." It is a numbers game, a math, as when one develops one moves from the general to understanding more and more detail, more and more awareness of the parts and the nuance of the whole as the ordinary, as a composition, to the extent one master's the parts, one can become small, and large, at the same time as presence, and within this, one can close the circle as move into grace, and fit into life, as the physical. Thus, in plain sight, is given the means to the end, it is simply played with as a form of distraction. After all, even a system of separation is still a system. 

Automation is visible Day 806

I noticed this morning a subtle bitterness surrounding me. Yesterday, I had entered a home after knocking on the door, which caused a dog in the home to become excited and bark. I was told not to knock because it excited the dog and to instead, enter without knocking. I noticed a slight irritation in the tone of voice used to convey this way of entry. I realized that in the heat of the moment, a peace interrupted, I might have reacted in the same manner. I let this go, because it lead to a place that was not productive. Later I went and reviewed the moment, to realize the switch. 

Then, I noticed this bitterness that I have noticed before, become present in my own cycles of behavior that I am in the process of noticing. They are no longer as large, yet whispers of them exist.  I ask to what was I not paying attention in that moment of sorting out my own habituated behaviors of protection and defense of myself, based on ideas of what defines who and what I am.  In some ways, I could say I am more aware of a general field of movement around me, than only that of the emotional fears within and as me. It is, a change of focus, from a currency of inflamed values projecting a story of protection over a story of greater presence and consideration of all that is me here. It is coming back into the very fabric of this reality. 

I looked at the sense of dread in the last couple of weeks, and upon moving to engage with others,  this sense of “ what if” comes up. It is a question as to whether or not I can in deed, do that which I move to share with greater clarity, which is bringing more focus into the practical reality as that very fabric that composes who and what I am as a physical expression of life.

I reviewed accelerated learning techniques. One area has to do with right and left brain use. The maths, that are more detailed oriented, are left brain oriented. Music, dance, art and the investigation of global issues are more right brain oriented and have an outcome of increasing overall information processing speeds. The contrast of these physically demanding skill sets, and being aware of global movements, is telling in itself. Being aware of global movements would by definition demand a greater presence of the physical use of resources in this reality, thereby enhancing awareness of the physical use of self, just as music and dance and art does. My one son is studying art. I talked with him the other day about automation. As one masters a skill set in regards to art, as in music, one gets to a point where one notices that what one has built becomes automated and can run away with one, if one does not catch it. One must go back to the basics to ensure one does not become automated in one’s actions. This can appear to be tedious, because one has to slow down and relook at the small. That means slowing down the automated movement that can feel like a running train inside one. My son already has started to notice this, well, if he can, and I have, it is more natural than I make out here! Yet, these skill sets demand that presence because they involve physical movement and not only imaginative movement within a set framework of information. One is seeing movement in physical time and space, the medium demands it. To do, one must reference physical movement. I see global resource use and movement as something that demands paying attention to the physical reality, and thus, this is why such awareness is placed in right brain function. This is turn would build a greater ability to process information faster. One has a physical reference of a living fabric. In contrast, only referencing a set body of information memorized within, would by design move more slowly. 

When I entered this home and had a slight reaction to a response towards my actions, that caused a momentary upset of behavior in the home, my focus on my own fear of definition, was a set box of beliefs that had nothing to do with the moment- even if the emotional response to my actions could have been cared for in a more gentle manner. It does not matter. I was distracted for a moment, on a belief, and though I could see around my own limitations in a moment, my own subtle reactions were still a distraction. They were also an automation, a running away of my own ideas about me, than any real movement in being present in the living fabric of reality;  that reality that must be used in such skill sets that involve more right brain activity, such as music, art, dance and global issues. I wold say, imagine all your words being learned in reference to that fabric, instead of only a set body of information,  or in protection and defense of inner beliefs that are a mis-use of a natural ability to be present and sense the very geometry of what is here as this physical reality? 

I would think that such reference would create a more stable human being, as that same part of self that can with skill set development, be able to recognize automation, which is noticing a subtle and slight separation from what one generates within and the movement of reality around one. What is also interesting is that once one can notice this, automation setting in, one can more readily recognize it in the movement of others. It is to say, “ too late” it is too visible, meaning once noticed there is no going back. Yet even here one must be careful. The same could be said of belief systems. Which is why if one should notice this, it would cause conflict should one point this out, because in effect one is pushing on an entity - as a time line of a series of values that has rolled itself up into  a ball and run away with itself - that entity is going to have a reaction as having to self realize and slow down and rebuild. That action in itself, is a change of pace that some may see as only a sudden change in itself.  That change is not necessarily a bad, but can appear to be disruptive if one is only focused on the momentary change. Overall, developing a presence, the kind that is of the right brain being involved, would enable one to not only see the parts ( those automated events) but also the context within which such automations are moving. Yet again, this is what the physical engagement of music, art and dance, and looking at the movement on the greater stage as global movement, would by design build within the self.  It gets pretty simple. It would be the same if one generated more words, or, had a mastery of words to the degree that one could read the overall generation and the self, as a relationship between the two, because one would begin to self realize what one generated as one would no longer have to think about the words as much. This is to place using language like paint, or notes, or a movement in and of itself, and to have the contrast of how resources are moving on a global scale, and how language is both a means to seeing patterns and being placeholders of information thereby improving memory skills and what distracts one from seeing the real fabric of earth, as the physical. Chaos is really being caught in a storm in a teacup. Yet that chaos made huge, as an inflammatory story, of limited values, is the stuff of distraction. I believe Noam Chomsky has said that people are distracted through huge arguments in a narrow focus/framework. 

One of the qualities that allow recognition of automated behaviors is a sense of being incomplete, which has a nature of restlessness to it. On some level the amazing ability of the self to understand automation, is to realize that somehow one has lost a stable foundation, as a mastery of self direction. At the same time, when realized as such, it becomes visible that allowing automation within to determine the self, has no long term gain. There is a sense that the rush is simply not worth it, its promise one of a false positive. One must pull back into what has greater longevity, to what can withstand the test of time.  Probably more struggle with correcting this than we realize, because in the end we cannot but NOT notice this. And we each know when we are not correcting it. This is why all hate is really self hate. As who and what we are, we are the means of awareness, so we cannot but recognize what we are doing within ourselves. 

I can see that even within writing this out, that bitterness I mentioned earlier, is really a state of fear. It is a state of fearing to lose something, which is really a means of showing myself that it is a demand within myself to slow down and investigate what is not in synch with what would being an ease of standing with what can be held that is always here all around me, as that very fabric of which I speak, that I need not fear losing, that the uncertainty can find constancy.  It is a fear of building a mistake, instead of realizing the building of being in a place where one can recognize an inner automation running away with itself. It is to realize a faith in recognizing when one ‘s presence as placement of awareness is steady and not of an automation as being the capacity of what it means to be human. Most masters understand this, and have that kind of faith, the company of which is the realization of the benefits of patience. Thus bitterness is really where I have not slowed down and investigated the expression of a relationship that opens a sharing of being present, meaning, a sharing of being present with this very capacity within me to recognize automation. It is describing something by what it is not. Sometimes, resistance reveals a point of change. Sometimes, recognition of automated behaviors has a similarity in that one has come to a point of a need to include a greater awareness. 

Drowning in the imagination Day 803

Drowning in the imagination

We spend 13 years in a box, being told stories about this world, a general scaffold of information in separation is imparted through a direct instruction model without real direct access to the real movement of this reality. We practice this in our minds ONLY. Because we become what we practice we automate and get stuck in, thinking that is of association to limited information without any real practice development. We are drowning in our imaginations. Like too much water or too little water, we kill an innate absorbent ability to see the qualities of reality and work with them effectively. 

The insecurity such a state creates is a loss of real focus. That spin in the mis-use of the imagination gets in the way and causes problems in our interactions with reality, as the very SOUND as the words we speak are all tied to that which we have practiced as ordered ourselves as, within a limited set body of information that becomes a spin of values of and as limited information, that we associate to and with when using words, because our words, our language has been practiced in relation to processing limited stories about things, that are not the whole story and thus, cause language to have no relation to reality. Thus we are drowning in our imaginations and it causes polarities as value judgements because it is insecure, it has no real living substantial thing to stabilize it. Then one is inferior to reality and cannot communicate and then spends focus on trying to sort that out: one’s words, one’s language is not in synch with reality, with the place of real doing. Our schools are bringing forward social/emotional templates which is social engineering necessary to balance out a lack of real focus that is caused by a mis-use of the imagination as an overuse of the imagination, without any real direct interaction with reality. It is the kind of situation that is of doing the same thing again and again and expecting a change. There is a reason why this is called insanity. AND, this in tandem with one of our most respected and famous people being a doer, who is saying the same things! Elon Musk is saying that public schools indoctrinate , and in being so busy doing so, they are not allowing a child to discover how things work! 

How did we get tho this point of being afraid to do, to be, to get the instrument of ourselves, as our bodies so out of whack with real and effective DOING? Obviously our children can learn because they can remember all the names of the movie stars, thus the problem of not that children cannot learn.  

I had a friend visit yesterday morning. He talked about things that had happened in his life in relation to sexual accusations. This is all over the media at the moment. My visitor came with stories of accusations in the past that had no reality, and he was worried that accusations would come out within my relationship to him. The spin of fear, the spin of stories and possible stories coming at me, that had no relationship to the common sense of the situation. He is a client of mine, and he comes to talk over a cup of coffee, that is all. He point blank asked me is I would do something like accuse him of sexual misconduct? At that point what can I say? He was so in a spin of fear, that all I could do was remain calm, as I also know from experience that these storms of fear, of a lack of real presence, will pass. At this point I said to remain in common sense, seeing that this was not what had happened, and that I did not have a history of being such, and to realize the use of glom and doom, as fear, that can become so blinding because in terms of processing information effectively, fear has one move in slow motion, in a state of thick invisible uncertainty to the extent things appear to be heavy and not what is real. This becomes  a practice if focused on for too long and then expedites as information, meaning one processes it faster, just as when one learns a real skill and becomes more capable within that skill over time, and pretty soon, that information is a small movement, like a ghost in the machine, to the extent one cannot remember and read that info correctly, and it becomes a trigger into itself as some vague emotion, in a way, causing a resistance to reality, and a suppression of common sense, and pretty soon, one no longer knows why one cannot move in this reality! One has a forgotten resistance to something that is simply a moment of making a value judgement in fear, that is then a part of the information of one, that one uses because one has practiced drowning in the imagination, and cannot understand how the movements in the machine were built. The person standing there, telling a story of inflamed information that is not grounded in reality, and filled with hyper polarized ideas made larger than life. And yet, it is so small, as to be invisible, much like a ripple moving through the machine, and loud through the mis-use of words, all tied through association to that imagination filled with mis-information from an extreme scenario also made larger than life through our media. Our media is a reflection of a mis-use of our imaginations.

All of this spin of separation from reality must be reverse engineered, and ourselves grounded back into correct use of our presence, our absorbent ability, to become solution oriented to this living physical reality that involves practical actions that is a state requiring we be focused here. To turn the tide takes the effort of recognizing the spins into misinformation that is always colored with fear, that state of accepting an angle of response as the lesser evil instead of being present and realizing in every action what does no harm to this physical reality. This means taking the good, and respecting all things, which would by design get one out of centuries of passing down a seed of information to the next generation that is more of the same as that mis-use of the imagination through an imbalance of making what is in one’s mind larger than the reality around us.  No one can recompose what is in the self but the self. One must recognize a movement into fear, and how such practiced repetitions of fear can lead to the most subtle of resistances to reading the reality around one. It is all a math in plain sight.

The mechanisms of separation are the churches - as it has been said - to control a human, one places them in a box, and fills them with stories of a better life somewhere else all the while the resources are slowly controlled into a false and limited construction via a paper castle owned by a few. What is the military industrial complex but a false construct desiring control, but a reflection of what each desires, which is self control, which is self mastery, which is being able to move one’s self effectively in this reality. What behaviors do middle school students reveal but a desire to participate? The actions of acting our showing us to ourselves, as the information within is not structured in ways that lend a direct seeing, to place a correct use of an innate absorbent ability into building skill sets that have a living relationship to practical reality? As humans we desire to participate, as humans we are most happy and most calm when we are communicating with this reality. An inability to do so simply reflects our right and left brains are not in synch, our focus mechanism, is not in line, in focus with this living reality. It is the most simple of things, what is complicated is the practiced movement of judgement of right and wrong, within self defining movements, within, causing an elevated and hyper inflated-of-limited-values resonance within, distracting a natural ability to move though the eye-of-the-needle of an as self as presence, as sentient nature, a life nature, into reading and thus reeding/sounding/reciprocating  life, which is in plain sight and physical. At present, this mis-use of the imagination, is but a ripple of ideas, beliefs, and opinions, circling in various stages of grief, initiated as fear, within the self that ends up hoping for a greater life somewhere else, and begging some invisible authority to forgive one for one’s transgressions instead of self realizing that self embraced fear over seeing directly as respecting this reality and focusing here, to instead always move in ways that do not harm. This is building real presence. This is synching with self mastery into the small and the whole. This is realizing a living breathing wholistic equality to all things that are here, as they are so much more substantial than that ripple, as a whirling string of mis-information composed of limited information, separating one from a real focus where one would find real happiness. 

Slow dow and breath, realize even the smallest movements of resistance to what is here. Remember past actions and forgive them, see where one gets lost in the sequences of grief, and call these things out by name, to recognize them and redirect one’s focus back into reality as the physical, understanding how all of this works. Reverse engineer the within to be in synch with life, as life is physical and in plain sight, which is common sense. This is the reason for the living word, to align one’s words, with a correct practice, to not only see the mis-use of the imagination but also to realign one’s innate presence back into being grounded and whole, as being equal and one to the physical creation that is the gift of life and all around us. Imagine an orchestra being in tune, being in synch, being in communication, all parts hearing all the other parts, and realizing that all parts help define one, help place one into being in synch and creating a sound world, one that flows in an expression of life, as that would be heaven on earth, just as we were told. 

There are tools to help one do this. There are tools to recognize the practiced patterns within, and how to rebuild a focus without. Distraction is used to separate and yet it can be used to distract one from a mis-use of the imagination, to the extent one can see the timed lines of information whirling around within one, that have a quality of pulling one into a polarized value judgment, and not a specific action that lends correct self direction in this living reality, to the extent one creates and builds effective communication with what is here, which manifests in ways that live doing no harm, as one would want for one’s self. 

One must stand up, and  call out by name the constructs of separation into hyper inflated value judgements. The anecdotal stories are all around us, they are of ripples and they are a state of being out of synch with reality. They have the nature of not being calm as that absorbent state is and does. They are of sequences that are the same as the sequences of grief, and they distract us from seeing directly here and have us live as beggars for some authority to come and save us from ourselves. Yet only the self can bring back in the fractions of separation resonant within and projected without, and reverse engineer one’s natural presence to mirror the living physical life in formation in plain sight, a physical life that is getting sicker and sicker, because the real life is being pulled from it into the opposite of life, which is fear. One way is to realize, in the most simple of ways, that at present, in the United States that the minimum wage is not a living wage, whereas since the 70’s this through a movement of gradual layers of justifications has become a difference of a high school student being able to work a summer job and attend college, to that no longer being financially viable. This limits real doing, and real opportunity that leads to a resonant seed in synch with this life in plain sight. 

One must recognize that emotions are a movement into loss, into fear, into not-enough-information. And that feelings are often false positives, that are justifications for the emotion that is an absence of effective presence in reality, and a movement into insecurity and fear as a loss of holistic presence. That such practices can accumulate into and are composed of, a resonant time-line of and as a story of sequences of movement as events that come to define the self through acceptance, and distort through a veil of mis-information the real and physical living formation around us that is physical life. One must realize that placing children in a isolated environment to memorize information, is a mis-use of capacity, and the reason for increasing levels of cognitive dissonance with each generation, as what we generate in one life resonates into the next, unless we stop. All religions have the golden rule as their base, in this we are all the same. When we give as we would receive, and take that which is good, as that which does no harm, by degree it means being focused here, respecting the physical reality, realizing that our resonant constructs are products of the environment as we learned to work with here yet made the mis-take of believing our within is larger than the reality around us. In so doing, we made our environmental practices into cultures, that then forgot how we were built, and made idols of those resonant experiences, and created borders based on that resonance, to the extent we fought for our resonant constructions that were all composed from the culture of the environment, yet must be able to live transformative change in every moment which demands a direct focus and respect of the physical reality. The loss of authority precipitated the need for authority, showing ourselves to ourselves, which so many of our stories reveal. There is only one choice, to forgive what has been generated and to reconstruct, as reverse engineer our resonant information to become in synch with the living reality. This is the only place where life can exist. And, it makes sense, as it is the means to being life here. 

One must correct one’s presence and focus onto life, as it is here in plain sight. 

Looking at the word ' Protean ' Day 796

Looking at the word Protean

This week, I remembered AS KING myself in my twenties how I could be more able to change to meet the expression of a musical piece. Anecdotally, how could I be more changeable within in one moment, playing a  more classical piece of music by Mozart and then be able to change to the whole measure of a piece of music from another era, or genre, such as Brahms. I realized it involved being more changeable. After all, what is music but a math, a form, with different tensions, timings, measures, values, intensities. All things that I may change in a moment, just as I would change within the values of numbers, as in playing with a formula using numbers. And then, also, changing within a form of movement, as in building a set of steps for the entryway into my home from the outside. It all involves realizing, as seeing, as measuring, as being aware of, the values, the qualities of the things I am placing myself into a relationship with as a focus onto. The state of being of a person, in terms of their development in relation to their state of measure within, and the state of measure, as qualities composing the whole, as the world around us, as the without. 

Many years ago, within standing in front of a classroom of 4th grade students, coming from being immersed in a musical environment, I looked out across that room of sentient beings, and realized that I was dealing with so many different measures of exposure to values that I could not possibly address each one. AND, I was in a system - as all things are systems, which is a series of relationships. This system was one of a direct instruction model. Meaning, my job, within the formula, was of one imparting information to many to bring forward a set body of information, composing a picture, abstractly,  to that body of many. Thus, my responsibility in that set of orders, was to bring forward a picture about something, and then practice allowing the body to build relationships into having some greater insight, that was then for the individuals to build within from, and upon. I, as the teacher, could not be that for the students. It is like a small means of building a greater understanding, one that can work when the given structures are built upon, as expanded outside of that initiating situation. It is just like a student with an instrument. Someone of more, or greater mastery, directs towards more realizations within the doing of the thing, that is then utilized by the user, to  expand in self discovery as to what the relationships as the values of that instrument exist within to realize a greater working relationship. Simple. It is an act of stepping into understanding a system, because in effect, everything is of parts working together, which means things are systems. This means that everything is essentially a math. This is how creation works. 

Within this, how can I be more flexible, more changeable, more fluid within myself in relation to respecting what is me that is all around me, as who and what I am in the physical state of sentience that is what is here? 

I remember parents coming to me to request violin lessons. Some would become my friend and then ask for lessons, with a story of what they could afford. It took me a while to catch this. When I said I could not survive on the sum they said they could pay, within me knowing, for example that they never drove a car that was more than 5 years old, they were suddenly no longer the friend they proposed to be. This was a hard thing for me to face, and it brought on anger and disgust. Here, I was moving, as my emotional reactions of blame and disgust, in self interest, not applying what I was using to realize/process the defaults ! Also, I had a hard time, because of beliefs in being polite, in pointing out certain logistical fallacies in the body of information, which was revealed through layers of information, as small anecdotal actions building a picture. This picture being the money being used not valuing the education of the child. Or, wanting the education of the child, which was understood, to not have too great a cost.  Ironically, educating a child is the most expensive thing, and why? Because, it is the most important thing. It is, in effect, realizing a proper use of a natural sentient ability to realize systems effectively. This brings me back to my own point, that of realizing greater changeability, or a more sound ability to process the values and relationships, within and without, about this living reality and my own built ideological constructs within that. 

I thought, or openly asked myself about living greater changeability in relation to musical practices, and yet, I did not relate this to the sounding, as the directives moving me here, as essentially being the same thing! An inner mis-use of the imagination, as an amplification of certain self defining values, is and can be a HUGE distraction! This can slow down an innate changeability. It is like the inner framework of accepted values, gets caught in its own picture show at the expense of everything else. This then becomes a program within that is not in synch with reality. It becomes what we can call, a slow processing dis-order. This problem is rampant in our public schools. I have sat with a superintendent, from one of the best high schools in America today, who has said to me that the number of slow processing disorders in the school are extensive.  

A general scaffold of information is not an education. Within a bubble of comparison, from a state of lack, it can appear to be a more. That is an illusion. This is how a ‘ good ‘ can really be a limitation. 

On a personal level, a general scaffold of a framework of information, within, using an abstraction about something to lend direction ONLY, creates a state that is missing effective awareness as it is lost in a mis-use of the imagination not having effectively practiced respecting  the qualities and relationships of what is in plain sight as this instrument of the physical reality that is the life that is here. Separation is done through a system, awareness is built through systematic and effective movement, as respect of living reality. In effect, because humans use communication, a mis-use of words can create a stagnant processing dis-order. It is really no different than myself sensing I should have a greater ability to be more fluid in changing in a moment, to expressing Mozart and then expressing Brahms.  If I have practiced processing information ONLY abstractly, without enough practical experience, would not my processing of information move into disorders within changing into another abstracted form of information? I have essentially practiced one mode of operations without application, which is slow and of a state of distraction,  misprint in the cells of the body, creating a misalignment to reality. I then become that, and change appears counter intuitive. I then get lost in a comfort zone of not-necessarily-bad information, yet limited information, where the lack of spatial relationships in reality, appears to upset that which I have practiced! It is a quantum imbalance, as a systemic series of relationships. One of which punishment for, is not a corrective process of balancing out, as finding solutions to reopen a natural ability to learn, to process information, to respect this living reality, and to learn to move in synch with and as it. After all, this is where real happiness exists, because we are anxious when we are insecure, and happy when we know something to the extent we can communicate effectively and build, as create, that which can remain stable, and that which can realize transformation, leading to no longer living in fear. In asKING, I can realize greater structural awareness of how all of this works, and call out the logistical fallacies that are polarized value judgements, that are a processing of information in separation from reality. We all know when we are in a polar vortex of limited constructs as ideas, spinning within, building friction and leading no where. We see this in a sudden contrast when we step out of it, and in a moment, sense the whole and the parts and wonder where we have been. 

Ineffective processing is an amplification of limited values, layered and resonant within, from a practice of focus on structures without real respect, as cross reference to this living physical reality. And yet, that ability to focus on ‘ something’ reflects an ability to process information. What i come to realize, more clearly, is that all the research in reading skills development, makes it so clear, that the greater our vocabulary, the greater our ability to process the notes, as the words, the greater our ability to do what is essentially the math of what is here around us. Our ‘ song’ within, must be able to move in synch with the math of what is here around us. Humans with a more effective vocabulary, are more able to process what is all around them, which means what is happening within, and what is without. It can process the past, a resonant amplification in the body, and what is focused upon in the conscious mind, and what is without, as the same constructs in other humans around us, and the math of this existence. If we as a species, actually are self honest with who and what we are, we already know this, and have flashing moments where we see between the limitations of a mis-use of the instrument that is who and what we are here in this reality.  It is simple, what is complicated is a math of limitation, that is a resonant mis-take of and as a reflection of this reality projected from within each individual, each instrument of and as the human physical body. One must develop a critical processing of this math within and without, to become more in synch with one’s shadow existence, as a system of relationships, and change to be changeable in processing the math of the systems around us as the reality as the physical, and a superimposed system that is on one front,  a mechanism to control that lack of real processing ability, that is what our bodies are the perfect means to be and do. Essentially, this means to accept the gift of life that is a correct use of this instrument. 

I will continue with the word ‘ Protean.’ 

Thinking Big, Acting Small Day 795

Think big act small

This is a phrase, that I find myself repeating at the moment. I ask myself what does this mean? 

It is to utilize the what, where, why, when, and how.  All of these a basic math, as one recognizes the present, this moment, as such lends attention to the small act that is what one can do in any given moment. Such an equation of recognizing qualities of and as the things that are here as the physical, that substance one uses to move oneself as what one is here, as a physical state of being. These are the means to looking at the small as a sum of parts to then make a choice that respects what is here, as the very means of being, and to realize a focus of consideration with presence of more than only self, towards that which enables the self to exist.  I mean, why not master moving here, why not learn to move here, in this physical reality with ease? 

It is the same as mastering a musical instrument.  One must be aware of what is moving within the self, and the effects of what is created on the environment around one. If I did not maintain a balance, meaning myself moving with ease, the imbalance, as a tension, would accumulate and attention would have to leave focus on the greater whole, and attend to what was not attended to in the onset within the self, and rebalance and correct. That which accumulated and took attention away from being in awareness of more than only the self, as one cannot perform with a group if one is not listening to all parts. 

One’s language , as what one speaks as sounds, representing thoughts, reflective of the values one chooses to place on one’s tongue are never the real thing, and always about what is here, as one’e experiences. When we only listen to what one says, without placing it into the physical and practical context , do we separate ourselves from what is real, and take the picture show  ABOUT what is here, to be more than what is here? I mean, a baby is not born with language, with the ability to manipulate a tongue into words, this they learn from their environment. As is made clear in all reading research, as research in reading skills development, those who have a larger  effective vocabulary, simply have greater success. An effective vocabulary is what one tongues, having a direct relationship to the sum of the parts, as the integrity of this practical - because it is physical - reality, around us.

This would mean that we often focus more on the equations as the words people speak, than we do on the reality. Thus, words are a great means of self definition and also a great means of manipulation. Words from a distance, meaning words dictating what should be done in a moment in a given place, on this earth,  cannot possibly be in consideration of all the things that are in that place, because the presence of the parts of one given place is not possible from a distance within a consciousness locked in value judgements misusing the imagination. Such is a human being who has lost all sentiment, or sentience, because listening to the words of another, and building pictures in one’s head based on a starting point of a set of words, is a state of not being focused in reality. This is what, in all common sense, has been done with children placed in a box, away from reality, to then learn about reality, in a closed room, practicing making pictures in imagination ONLY, over and over and over again. When we repeat an action, we become that action, as this is how one learns about things, to look and to attempt to interact until one realizes the parts. Thus, to say we learn by repetition, is a lie, because we try and try again until we see, until that absorbent ability senses the parts and then practices moving them accordingly, within proper function. This is what we did without  manuals, as we learned to sense our arms and our legs and our tongue; we in essence,  sensed the parts and learned of their relationships to the whole. In this, we acted small, to think big, we acted small to become aware of the environment around us, that bigger extension of ourselves, the reality we were in a relationship with. 

The fewer words a person effectively knows, the greater the tendency towards degrees of violence and frustration. These are actions of force, which means that one does not have the vocabulary to direct one’s self effectively. One has not integrated the necessary small acts that are required to get something done effectively. In order to increase vocabulary, one must not only practice the language, as place correct sounds on the tongue, utilizing the human physical instrument effectively, one must also build considerate relationships of and towards the reality that is what enables that tongue to accept a sound to use to communicate. 

One example, from my perspective that reveals how great is the separation from considering reality, a physical reality, are the social warriors, who believe that the personality, which is a composition of values used to define a person is greater than the real story of creation as the real symbols as the physical reality that is all around us, that is here. Acts of resistance towards anything that does not perpetually substantiate that self definition which is of shadow as ideas about one’s potential is in fact, in measure, a state of resonant separation from reality.  Realize from a subtle shift in perspective, it is threatening to realize a personification of values used to define the self are potentially limited on a physical planet, if the planet should be considered before in-culturated/repeatedly practiced as absorbed from parents of the same movements , as a series of value judgements/self embraced definitions are an act in lieu of respect for what is the same as the self, as the physical. This means a shift out of reality, into self inner ideas about who and what self is and does. Here, imagination is mis-used because one is using thought in a small way, instead of thinking big, as respecting all of what one is on a physical planet, AND respecting that before creating a shadow of personification of ideas, as which qualities are potentially generating a more, which creates a system of survival as competition to constantly compare qualities as values composing a combination of ideas about the self rather than who and what the self as a physical state of being really in practical fact is. Recognizing the small , as all things, moving as always being in a relationship to the physical reality, with respect, as focus here, is acting small, and yet considering the whole. It is to act small, and to think big. 

This is why, those who have an effective vocabulary, have more effective action in this reality. An effective vocabulary, is really having mastered a larger number of words, where the words have a direct relationship to this practical reality. Personalities fighting for their justification, are a series of words that have a relationship to a busyness in self definition without regard for who and what they really, practically, physically exist within and as. It is a mis use of the imagination, it is acting in self interest, as taking what one has inflamed into what one is as a singular value, and expecting everyone to make one’s self projected value judgement larger than the real and physical creation surrounding the self as a physical state of being. Most of us fear facing that ghost in the machine, because we are products of this separation from reality, so well defined in a box, for 13 years or so, in total separation from reality. What a beautiful design to cause whole generations of people to completely lose touch with what is real, the physical. I believe it is a post script to our churches. Or even a post-script-spell to a scare-crow type of figure when the crops failed as agriculture moved into more monopolized designs. Was our initial worship that figure to scare away the crows? Was that a small movement, or force, against nature? Was that the first personification made idol with the stuff of the physical?  What was that small movement that started a time-line of events that built a tree of less dimension, as a picture show lacking focus on working with the practical living physical reality all around us? When did we forget who and what we really are? When did we forget that we are the sum of all parts, as the big, where respecting the small was the means to realizing the whole. I mean, have a look, why do we start with the abc’s and end with the SAT’s? 

It is all a math, and it is time to form in the image and likeness of what is the means of being here, which is the physical reality. This is to think big and to open up effective practice, as to act small. It is so simple- that personification of hyper inflated values as the character of personification, is the ghost in the machine that is composed of value judgements that misuse the body, creating electrical currents to perpetuate the picture show in the head, that burn up the physical body because one is not in real presence with the life that is here, that is physical. One has no real integrity. One must become like a Sherman tank tongue, and speak up about this, again and again, and again, until it is heard, until one sees this, because as human beings, that are haptic entities, we are most happy when we are aware, we are most happy when we are thinking big and acting small.