One of the things in relation to the mind consciousness that I realize more and more, as I have written about this so much, is how once I find myself couched in thinking, I spin around in what appears to be endless thinking. That thin-king I allow myself to be. So much effort placed in thinking. It is a form of imagining, taking things, events, and spinning them around and around in my mind.
How can I possibly be present if I am doing this? I have become the practice of what public schools have lead me to be, which I followed and allowed, to move as a limited story ( information) in a focus so narrow that there is no real information for me to problem solve.
I am in separation from the physical reality that I used to learn to crawl and to walk and to talk. I have become a mind consciousness instead of being conscious, as was the natural way when I was born, of the world around me that was me, that is physical. The real information is life in manifestation as the physical. My awareness has become caged in a box of informed, limited, practiced-at-slow-speed -only-set-body-of-information. An awareness that will by nature quantify information, assess and investigate, or sense what is around me was caged in imagination only. my awareness is voracious in nature, as it must be, to be in respect of everything that is here- unless it ignores what is here and entertains itself in a busyness that cycles in limited value judgements as thin-king. When we say and do things that are not grounded, meaning when we do not understand something enough, we get nervous, because we know when we do not know something enough to make a sound decision in self directing.
It was not too long before I found desteni that I had moments in my life where I wanted this ‘ thinking’ to stop. I had realized in some moments, that I was in - deed spinning around information in my mind, looking for the lesser evil, assessing movements, trying to find a solution that would cause less damage to my own life. I had to some extent realized that something was not what was best within the system.
This was more in relation to health and agriculture. I had also noticed something amiss in politics, meaning I had avidly read a conservative magazine from front to back each week - as I was more voracious about information than the information as the physical world After three years of this, I decided to do what I had asked of the ‘ other side.’ This was to read not only one’s political enclave, to also read the opposition’s as well. What I found on line were articles that I had read from my ‘ side’ being placed in the other’s perspective. A few words were changed, etc. It took me some time, I was reading something and realized I had read the same thing before. Then I noticed this more and more. At this point I began to realize that the articles in the news were manufactured by the same people. It was systematically spewed out! This is Machiavellian, it is placing value judgements out in the social collective, and creating chaos through division of ideas, beliefs and opinions.The internet is a competitive ground to inform the mind. It is a war for the mind. Within this we have allowed an economic system that allows only those who have accumulated money to determine what we think, and thereby what we eat, what we watch, as ideas, beliefs and opinions that inform us,as this is how we work. There for, real information happens on the ground, one plus one- this very way that all that is built and here, has been done, right on front of us.
Last night there was a post about common core. It was in relation to how math is being taught in the schools. What happens is not a ‘ bad’ it is an elongation of problem solving. That elongation is practiced again and again and again, out of a context of expediting information, a natural thing for a presence to do that has learned to sense space and distance and duration, enough to self direct their body with that sensing presence and to speed up their processing as what was unknown and seemingly huge, was made small and processed with greater ease. Within practicing elongated processing of how numbers move, again and again and again, one becomes this practice, it slows down what is natural, it acclimates the child to slow motion thinking processes- one that can take years to change, or years to discover another measure of moving, yet by then, one is an adult, and has to make a living, so there is little time to change as one is now busy in doing the same elongated movements in the imagination and making a living where there are few venues to make enough to get out of being in a constant state of stress due to money. Yet remember that no one can be responsible for you but you. Why? Because no one can put you back together but you. There is no way out of this. For this reason, blame and spite are pointless, they are not problem solving. They are what they are. You, as a physical state of being, are what you are. I become what I accept and allow.
Another example appears in sport games. Those times when the team cannot seem to get out of a pattern, cannot see beyond the boundaries of their information. This in contrast to those games where the team comes out of being stuck, and change up the pattern of the game, to change the movement, the form, and do what appeared impossible in the previous moment, to win the game. One has to practice moving outside of one's set body of information- which means making mis-takes, a natural order in the process of learning.
Our money system reflects the movement, meaning the amount of money one makes is equal to the processing ability of reality with matching communication skills- meaning you really have to effectively know your words.. Noam Chomsky has said that the educated are educated just enough to believe they are educated, when they are not educated. If some within this limited state compare themselves to others in this same state, one is competing in the business of information- a separation from life overall. Within this one becomes agitated, nervous, anxious, because the information is not solid, stable, consistent and self directive. Thus, when we become agitated it is because we are moving as knowledge and information instead of respect and presence in reality, the physical. We begin to become what I spoke of about myself in the beginning of this post; I find myself spinning in thinking and become a thin-king in relation to living fully in this spatial, physical, multi dimensional world that comes before that spin of thinking in my mind as evident in how I learned to crawl all by myself.
Within my latest accepted and allowed bout of being a thin-king, I realized that I was moving energetically wanting to blame and spite, and I did not look at the mechanism of what is so much discord in our reality. That machiavellian tool of creating chaos. That means of infiltrating what was a emerging functioning well known system, to change the tune, in self interest. It was to begin to speak words again and again of a more, of another way, suggesting to another that there is a more, a greater with less effort. Within this, that those others had deceived and a response of "was that person making the money suggested?"
At this point, I am more angry with myself, because I saw the seeds of this and did not follow through, I did not want to think something bad, because I believed myself to be morally good, so pointing out a sense that something was not ‘ right’ meant answering to it, and since I was not looking and since I myself was ashamed of my own fear of speaking up or out the name of deception, I protected my own moral goodness- this that I had practiced for so long that it is habituated. I was basically both in a morality and a fear of speaking up. I had practiced a thinking system of slow motion that was really a constant placating within justification that to see through the veil of my own self accepted and allowed conditioning, happened in tiny moments where I might sense something greater than my own accepted and allowed limitations- that were a resonance of thoughts as my living deed to myself, the waste of my innate ability to assess and investigate that I had been born with, that I had used to learn to walk, and to crawl and to eventually ‘ think.’
And yet, the patterns of division are right there in front is me, this creation of chaos to then play the savior within, via solving the reaction to the problem instead of the problem itself. Ironically I am told to reinvent myself- a pretty sounding truth overall. I ask myself if I can read an article and process the information immediately, because this is myself being equal to the words and grounding them in reality, in the infrastructure of this world that is life information.
My memories are the shield of my own self interest, where I did not consider reality. They are a false morality, so they spin around in looking for a lesser evil, instead of being practical in a living relationship to physical creation information, manifest all around us. What is within me as thin-king is the degree to which I am present . The consequence of this practice in men in this physical world is an energetic resonance on top of the physical, because we become what we think about as this is how this works. We are creators. We either realize oneness and equality, as actions of respecting all things and ensuring no harm, or we continue down this path of destruction. Blame and spite, rejection and suppression are not living, they are states of being that are not that presence grounded in respect of all things, living in respect of all things. The so-called pollution needing to be cleaned up is also a resonant pollution, that is energetic. The marker if this are behaviors of frustration and anger, of blame and spite, all easy to see in that they have no gentle quality to them, no patience, no presence of being.
They are me when I become anxious, frustrated, impatient and nervous/shaky. They can be seen embedded in the very way we move our legs and our arms. I mean watch a video of a young person who has mastered some physical skill to some degree, there is a great sense of presence within them- and to note, some have become automated in their movements. Parents and the system often turn such development into a performing monkey, and the presence begins to fade. I mean, in music there are stories of great violinists who learned the concertos at a young age, that as adults, performed very drunk, because the physical information they had learned and embedded into their physical bodies took over. The performer was so bored and the awareness caught in an end game it was unused and sought a deafening of itself through alcohol. Meanwhile the body performed.
Think of a prisoner who readily goes into behaviors of intense physical lashing out, they are programmed in a lack of opportunity for development, they do not have the means to express and to order, as that state of lack has caused so many problems in moving themselves in reality that they cannot make a living and are so unable to self direct. We end up punishing them for this, which is obviously not the solution. The solution is to rebuild, to allow that presence to become what is natural, to return to being present through a practice of grounding themselves in this physical reality, to slow down and realize what does no harm in their movements, which means their natural rights to have the basic needs to support what they are as physical states of being must be unconditionally met. The removal of a fear of death, and a fear of punishment, would quiet them down, and reverse their attentions to slowly ground their beingness back into being present in this reality, that is life. And yes, some are so far gone that this will not work, yet this must be the way because prevention is the best cure. It is time to realize that the physical is reality, is creation, and the mind is what reflects our degree of presence within that reality. Any blame and spite, causes discord, because it divides into value judgements that then fight among themselves.
Within myself, I realize that I continue to judge another when I face anxiety, nervousness, agitation in another. I want to resist, to become angry, as a sense that I am not being listened to. Yet, the answer is right there in front of me, just as when I catch myself spinning in information in my mind, my presence being what my presence as life is, a sensor of form and function, movement and expression. The quality of this so able to sense so many things, a quality that is a will of understanding and expansion, as this is the law of life, a natural drive.
I can catch myself spinning around, and stop. I can realize agitation for what it is, without reaction towards it, as becoming a resistance of assessing it, realizing it cannot define me unless I allow it, realizing agitation is the marker of not having enough information to equalize to reality and direct in ways that do no harm. I can say, in specific ways, that agitation is a marker of not having enough information, and that this agitation is energetic because it is a thin-king/ presence accepting limited information- a form of idolatry. I can say that agitation is the a personification of information that cannot fit into the physical world, it is the self showing the self how fractionalized one’s awareness has become, and how distant one is from life. Storms pass, what is stable remains. The trolls of limited information are recognized by generalities coupled with value judgements as they are food for blame and spite instead of guidance towards understanding all things, taking that which is good and giving direction into a self discovery of self as life, equal and one, grounded here. It is what allows the self as life to saturate who and what one is, as the awareness of the physical world being life information.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that when and as I become agitated, nervous, anxious I am in effect in separation from being present here, using the will of myself as life, the real nature of me as self, to focus here, to become patient and calm, stable and present, seeing realizing and understanding within this, that I abdicated myself as life, into an idol of informatiom, that is evident in my ability to process the information that is here that is me in another life as the physical world of life as creation information.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand when and as I find myself caught in the thin-king of thinking, and within this to stop, to simply stop, as I will only lead myself to agitation and anxiousness, and uncertainty, thus it is to stop and to breath, and to slow myself down, to reverse what i have accepted and to ground myself back here, seeing realizing and understanding the storm is energetic and not equal in present to and towards a respect of all things, as the physical, all that is me in another life, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to react to agitation, to anxiousness, to resistance, to want to react, to blame to spite, which is really myself not addressing directly what is here, especially when the solution is to listen, to slow down, to allow the storm to pass, as it is in itself an equation of generalities coupled with value judgements, of which reaction to and towards within me have the same quality as agitation, anxiousness and uncertainty.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to choose survival before what is best for all, meaning to act in my own self interest before a consideration of all that is me in another life, that is around me here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see realize and understand the con-sequences of what I have accepted and allowed as information, that I have programmed myself to be and that becomes resonant within and as me, are the responsibility of myself to reform, to being back down to earth and ground in actions, in thought, word and deed, to and towards what considers all things, to take that which is good and does no harm.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to disempower myself as life, as the presence of life that is me here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become reactive towards what is agitation, anxiety, uncertainty, within a belief that this can define me, or destroy what I have defined myself as, and within this to realize the solution as this very anxiety is a sign of not having enough practice as presence in reality, as not being grounded in the simple, as paying attention to all things, taking that which is good and grounded as this is realizing what does no harm.
When and as I find myself lost in thin-king I stop and I breath, I slow down to reassess and listen, to realize the passing storm that by the nature of energy cannot withstand the test of time, and that this within and as me, is a marker of myself not being myself as life, present and willing that very nature of me to live what is best for all, here.
When and as I find myself reacting to agitation, or to not realize its state of being, I stop and I slow down and I breath, to assess and read what is the state of being as myself and to stop, to live the words calm and stable, present and silent, to take back the power of myself as life.
When and as I find myself feeling disempowered, I stop I breath, I slow down and use the nature of myself that can get lost in thin-king, to see, realize and understand that this same presence can stop, breath, assess an investigate reality that is all around me, ever present, to realize what does no harm, and to realize actions that need no anxiety or suppression, as these by nature are clear and also are visible, present, grounded.
When and as I face anxiety, anxiousness, uncertainty, I see realize and understand in practice , as myself, in the details of thoughts, words and deeds as the tools of living here, to assess and investigate until I am present in the information of the physical to direct in ways that give as I would receive as this is the design of self discovery, which is to take that which is good and does no harm, this that is living the consideration of all things, this that grounds and respects the physical.