The starting point is the ending point, morality and Facing holographics of memory.
I notice that at times, processing what I have accepted and allowed as a math, as a measure as a form, memorized within and as who and what I have accepted myself to allow myself to be, as a projection of values, some call morality, ahead of myself through my head, a bubble shrouding a natural ability to sense here, this reality, moves like a molasses in processing this ghost in the machine of myself as a hued-man, is focus in separation from the gift of life, here, this earth. It can so easily move into knowledge and information. Yet this is where I am as I process m¥ own separation and breath myself back into being present in the physical. It is interesting, because a greater pattern recognition comes forward, and yet, I am still not present, because this has not been lived, for eons, thus I cannot assume I am done. In so many ways, it is a process that is never done, as it is learning to be self forgiving, in every moment, moving into recognition of myself as all that is around me as the physical.
I have not reconciled facing the storm of separation, around me, as others, and yet, a rejection of this reality is always a self hate. It is a rejecting of what is resisted, and since life is always here, that resistance will persist until what is rejected, through projection, as unresolved acceptance, is the very substance of life, giving itself as how life works, ever present and never ending. Life is eternal, that which is eternal.
I must realize that in standing up, what will happen, as our present system, will be the voice of separation. That voice is a morality in separation from practical common sense. I somehow want this to magically go away, yet this reveals a resistance within myself. I am not embracing what is here, thus I am that of which I speak, in a state of morality in separation from life. My starting point is still hued with fear, when I as life am capable of processing the math, the divide, of closing the gap, and creating a current of life moving between the banks of belief, opinion and idea.
The separation is only an apparition, and no apparition can define who and what I am unless I accept and allow it. For example, if I point out hurt and damage, instead of solution, as there are no problems and only solutions, I am focused on the lack and not equal to it, as being equal to something is not only seeing he limitation, but also realizing the movement, as words, as sequences of steps, that lead to a balance. That balance creates an open window into the ineffable grace and gentleness of sounding what imparts a willingness to take the reigns of being a self willed equal with all things. Here, I even notice myself becoming knowledge and information.
I cannot fear facing separation into a morality, As this morality is simply a form, a simulation of measure, of belief. It is one of those things that once it is understood in practice, or enough to be a consistent practice, a realization with hindsight, will be a state of ‘ Why did I not see this?” And then the shame, and the realization of the damage one allowed within allowing a morality of self interest without consideration of all things.
I am avoiding facing the storm, taking back my joy, as a sense that I am not allowed to be joyful. I am not allowed to play. I am supposed to work on the false technology of playing god so evident in what is a commerce of informed consent that offer products that by design suppress a natural sense of space and time, of and as who and what I am as life, here.
Yet, with practice, a little every day, what accumulates if a greater sense of walking mis-information and a mis-use of the imagination back into respecting this physical reality all around me. Those subtle and ineffable tiny movements, that appear to not have any significant difference, build, just as they do within a mis-use of who and what I am, the reverse is also the same. Thus, I am in a process of reversing a false positive, a limited morality that cannot materialize because it has not real sustainability in what supports and considers all things- and that is always here, as it is the real platform of life, the physical. It tells its story, sings it, as a math, as a song, all around me, I need only listen, and even this through a static that is really loud in some moments when I am calm and quiet. So, I walk back into being present, facing the storm, crying when I really want to express joy, because somehow I have turned joy into a suppression within myself, as though this is not allowed- even when right in front of me, a moment of not hating, of not resisting, of accepting separation as well as solution, is something I am capable of, and deserving of, because I am life.
The simplicity of the smallest of movements, that how such tiny movements of self correction into self forgiveness, are the beads of joy that can create a river, if I can forgive the shame for not having realized such a thing. The practice, of self correcting, with the very smallest of things, as words, to focus myself outside of my accepted and allowed holographic-ed morality, to rebuild, realizing the living value of each measure as each word, can be tiny movements of joy, of re-scripting the very sound of and as me, that I can in what is seemingly of no significance, rebuild an equality to life, instead of an elephant in the room that can lead to a death of a life never really lived, such as hanging from a rope in an attic, leaving the most precious of things behind as a child of life, a breath of life, within and without. The false morality, filled with the pain of hate, suppressing a natural gentleness within, that morality consuming the presence of life in that person, there is no way this can continue, none. It is realizing that a court uses verbs to create a fiction, an area of no go zone because it is a box of a false use of imagination, instead of focusing on the consequence of such forms. It is to take that which is good to show because pointing out the lack is another form of fear tactics which is wanting control more than building self willed equals. It is showing how ego can take a good and create a circus show, all eyes on the display of magic instead of following through and using what is discovered to suppress for the benefit of all things. It is like a librarian holding onto a library, and wanting to control the information of separation, when that in itself must be forgiven, as the real library is the physical world all around us, the greatest technology, as it is the technology of life. it is to focus on what is good and does no harm, to have faith in this. Such an act of pointing out the limitation would be the suppression of one’s joy within, that suppression causing a lot of pain.
I suppress myself when I fear facing the false morality around me. The storm must be faced, and it needs be feared.
The way out , as I see it in this moment, is to follow the joy within, to remind of the medicine taken in small tiny doses, as realizing the joy of self correction in grounding words back into a living word that recognizes the physical world with every movement, to script one’s self back into life, back into the real starting point as being a living presence, with full spatial skill, here. That would mean that life would increase in value, and awareness though out life. That would mean there would not be death, only the transformation into life, here.
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