Showing posts with label loopy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label loopy. Show all posts

Saturday, April 26, 2014

Day 544 Slowing Down into Common Sense


Slowing Down into Common Sense. 
I was working with some people and I noticed that I became spacy, as in having a sense that I had lost control, like the spatial awareness of what I was facing was bigger than the practical steps necessary to get the job done. 
Later, when I was alone, I looked at the steps that I was suggesting and looked at what was causing myself to get loopy, which is a sense of making everything get heavy, like a thick thing to walk through. Within this, I had a hard time seeing the numbers on the paper in front of me, a hard time being aware of the space around me, like what i had to do was becoming a blob of distortion. Since the physical remains stable, this was myself, magnifying some things creating a distortion onto my reality. 
I realize that I had an idea about what i had to do, and somehow, being in common sense of the moment, might bring up something that if I look has no real substance to it.
If I am afraid to hear a no, even when asked for a yes or a no, then I cannot possible address the “ no.” So, in all, fearing a no, is myself having gone into a projection as an idea, based on failure, loss, push-back, blame and spite, it is being competitive, it is comparing based on an accepted value judgement. I realize to be so thankful for the physical world, because it is here remaining stable while I allow myself to become an inner measure based on fairy tale/value judgements as beliefs that are not equal to what it is that I am that is the source that sustains the distorted separation in and as me here.
What happens when I do this, its that there is a pressure, a friction within and as my chest area. Like there are forces in conflict within and as me. I was reading that electrons can flow without generating heat, and that when they flow in a slow way they generate heat. Thus is is possible to control the flow of electrons to generate heat and or not generate heat. And, I don’t know this but as knowledge and information. What I have sensed within and as me as my chest area, is that there are times when this pressure is there, and times when there is a warmth, and times when it feels open, lite, at ease.
So, on the day of this meeting with some people, I noticed that my chest was “ thickening” again. So, I went back and looked at this in detail, and i noticed that there was this point where I was having a hard time moving with ease. And, I want to say, that in the years I performed the violin, I did notice that one day I could play with ease, meaning it was not hard, not difficult, not a burden in any way. And, then, there were days it felt like playing was this huge thing that I had to focus so hard on, to move in any way - and on these difficult days, I realized I usually had some issue, bothering me. So, if i look at this event, I became uncertain about a part of the process, even though I had practiced it, I was not certain within it. I had either built up some ideas around it, or had not practically walked it and was allowing this idea to bother me. When I got home I walked the whole process, to re-look at the script of it as the practical steps needed.  So, when the anxiety comes up, in relation to this, I have the structure there, the common sense of what needs to be done, to have this should the anxiety come up again. Much like learning to drive a car, for example.
I have to be able to remain in and as sound mind, a sense of here, in conception of practical reality, otherwise, if I allow fears, then my inner visual perception begins to distort reality. I mean, just imagine a situation where fear swept through the body, could you see straight? And later, when you looked back, did you ask yourself why you did not slow down and remain stable and self responsible without distorting reality - and did you not want to admit that you had done this? With all the cop stories around these days, I am sure that there are cops out there that realize they had an adrenaline rush, over reacted, and do not want to admit this, because they fear losing their jobs. Overall, this is really messed up, because another suffers the loss of common sense of another and this carries on with the one bearing the consequences, and this also remains with the cop, and grows into guilt, consuming the physical body that holds resonances as the water, and, as science now understands, becomes a memory that is passed down genetically. In all, everything we do, everything we allow remains, and we know when we were not clear, and we know when we hide what we have mis-taken as the measure of here in practical common sense. This is why this has to stop, and we each must realize that the only way to correct is to admit to the loss of perception that can be caused by a past of distortion learned, environmental problems, social economic structural problems that create lack in many ways, preventing a person from being stable and in fear of survival. This system cannot work and ignores the reality that the physical body is much like a lens, that can distort reality based on the inner map constructed about the world. In essence, one could say here, that emotional ploys are a crime against life, they are a distortion of reality, they are an imprint of belief, and, as such, are accumulating generationally, and manifesting in our children, who are lacking in an ability to focus. I have had some people say to me, “ well, it is being better diagnosed.” This in itself is limited, it is true, but also limited.  We have an advertising system that is impulsing values within limited measure, and this is becoming the map within, and this has been happening for the last few generations, so the focus of our children as what is referenced within as what is experienced, is not equal to physical reality, and as such they cannot see the details of here.
I can’t imagine what it must be like for a child to be in a state of vertigo, which is what it is like, while sitting in a class room, not being able to see straight and not understanding that perhaps it is from a genetic memory of a father who hid his actions because he wanted to keep his job, and as such built a fantasy within and as him to justify he actions, when overall, the starting point was not using common sense. In the past we did not have science, but we did have traditions that indicate a measure of some kind of innate understanding, and one of them was the realization of “ the sins of the fathers being transferred for seven generations.’ We sow what we reap, there is no way out. Thus each one of us is responsible for what we allow within, when we become uncertain, or in fear, we have to admit it, correct it, to ensure that our children do not suffer, as well as the children of others.
On another front, if we look to the environmental influences, we can see that what we are doing as how we use our resources, within every step of the process, we are causing things to happen to the environment that effect our children. So, at this point they are being hit from within and from without, and over all, as I said before, this is accumulating. Would this be what you would want as a child being born into this world? No.
It is going to take time to correct all of this imbalance. But, it is the only choice. It is the choice to do what is best for all, in thought word and deed, it is to create within and without, what allows creation, the manifestation of life in full expression. Within this, we need only look to the forms we have allowed - and formed to control/organize us, because what is here is to control our separation, but because we are not equal to life, overall, this structural form is destructive because it divides within value judgements that are a measure unequal to common sense of physical life in formation. And, that this has been going on for a very long time. It is time to end the cult of the personality, it is time to stabilize physical reality. Practically, this means creating a basic income that gives basic needs to all humans, and to educate all humans through sharing consequences and outflows, in full detail, to all people - which means slowing down and taking the time to do so. It also means, bring the stability of having basic needs met, no matter what, so that each has the space and time, without fear of loss, to make decisions that consider all life. In this, no matter where we go on earth, we met a community of life, as the very fabric of all that is the manifestation of life, moving in the enjoyment of simply being life here, and that with each interaction, with each communication, we expand, enjoy, breath, live. This is what we all want, we simply have to forgive the ideas of good and bad, and see directly, within and as what is best for all. It is only an idea that this cannot be done, because under that idea, is the physical that works in common sense ways, and when we are equal and one in and as that, we are at ease, in joy, here.
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Friday, August 2, 2013

Day 402 Walking into the Known: Self Correction into Common Sense


I commit myself to seeing realizing and understanding how I have divided space here on earth, this physical world into imposing values of more than and less than a GPS that measures in values of more than and less than, of good and bad in pursuit of survival in a system of unequal division that started within as an idea was made greater than equality with life.

I commit myself to seeing realizing that as a creator I have divided life into more than and less than, starting within, holding an idea, a picture, a value to be more than another and thus have held onto this for so long in fear of becoming myself as life manifested a system without of inequality, disrespecting life as I believed that one thing was more than another in abdication of my common sense as life as this common sense is myself breathing here realizing equality, being what I am as life which is the principle of what is best for all.

I commit myself to seeing realizing and understanding that when I encounter emotions, thoughts and feelings I am encountering divisions based on ideas of one thing being more than another based on an idea that is now systemically being played out where money is the mechanism of division into more than and less than, thus money is what creates the most reactions of fear, of resistance , of spite, of blame, of jealousy where reactions are often “ did you think this up” or “ are you going to profit from this” which sidetracks the issue of the product into the fear of loss, the fear of having to become responsible and realize what has been accepted and allowed has manifested without and is not going to magically go away, and thus a process must be walked, within and without to realign within and without into a order of equality, balanced out, followed through from inequality into equality, and the answers to this are right in front of us as us as life as we are life, thus we are common sense thus what we are as sound mind is equality and oneness which is living the principle of what is best for all.

I commit myself to, when and as I sense uncertainty and loopyness, to see realize and understand that this is myself in division from life, in unequal division which means I am not here, I am not walking, breathing, in equality and oneness in and as myself as life here.

I commit myself to, when and as I become uncertain, loopy, confused to stop and to breath and to look at where I am accepting and allowing, a division into a more than and a less than, where I am disrespecting my own common sense as life as what i am, and here, I slow myself down to see realize and understand what ideas of more than and less than, what accepted and allowed values, I have viewed life as being bad or being good, realizing the good is the validation of the bad that i have used to define myself within survival, a superciliousness, allowing a haughty air where I hold my self created more than value that is an accepted and allowed separation, isolating me from life here, and thus disallowing myself to follow through in and as life, to understand life, to be life, thus where I have moved as a value of good and or bad, warping reality, becoming unequal to life,  becoming stagnant and rejecting life, rejecting equality and oneness in common sense of life here as what i am.

I commit myself to seeing realizing and understanding that my mind has become the beacon of my separation from life as I compare in relation to limited ideas of more than and less than, of good and bad, values I have placed on words and things of this world ignoring the common sense of how the physical functions, and as such I walk in separation from life, in a bubble of my own acceptance and allowance, my own consent,  thus I can blame no one and no thing for what i have accepted and allowed as I am here on earth, the gift of life.

I commit myself to seeing realizing and understanding the muddy confusion of uncertainty that I have accepted and allowed as fear, as separation from life, as chasing ideas of good and bad, as not looking here in common sense with and as the physical world, where my actions have effects on the life as this physical world that are visible right before my eyes, as this earth is the gift of life, and thus to learn to become equal and one to and as life is the gift freely given, and thus it is to enjoy this equality and oneness to and as life, this birth of self into and as life here, to be and become an expression of life here, thus all accepted and allowed lack, as suppression in any form systemically must be ordered into absolute support of life, as life cannot begin until all life on earth, all form on earth is in full expression, like earth is a life machine and in order for it to be life, all parts must be in full function as life, thus our bubble existences of self aggrandizement  hiding fear of common sense must stop to see, realize and understand that nothing is grand until the whole entity of this earth, all parts are granted life absolutely, if it is not working for all then it is not working

I commit myself to seeing realizing and understanding that what is best for all is the only choice, the absolute as what works for all is the only choice, anything else in unacceptable.



I commit myself to no longer fearing to bring all judgement, as what a more than and a less than is, resplendent in the adjectives attached to nouns, in a whine, in a complaint,  as storms are created in teacups to avoid facing what is common sense right here in front is myself and to see, realize and understand that common sense is right here, as looking at the present system of inequality, of enslavement and lack - which is suppression of life able to be seen in judgements of more than and less than, of good and bad, as division, as smoke screen into misinformation in common sense as what is best for all, one and the same. 

I commit myself to seeing , realizing and understanding that when I doubt I am the mistake of common sense, I am allowing and accepting negativity in allowing myself to become unworthy of life, where instead of facing my separation, my rejection of life, my disassociation with life I become misinformation as spite and blame to push away my own rejection of myself as life, I stagnate into judgement and suppress myself as life, a crime against life, thus, I commit myself to investigating the divisions from common sense within and without and walking that which follows through into standing in common sense as what is best for all here until I remain stable, consistent and steady to and with, in and as common sense as what is best for all.

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Monday, September 17, 2012

Day 148 A consequence of physical separation

English: Viking lawn mower.
English: Viking lawn mower. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I am mowing my lawn, I did not see the rope on the ground. I broke my lawn mower because I was off in loopy land dreaming.


I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not be here, physically aware of my environment.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have had the back chat voices in my head say, Why the fuck is that rope there!, when it does nothing to blame some unknown seeable thing that placed this rope there, as it was me, so then another voice asked me how it moved to where it was, as I had not put it there but next to the tree, and then I wanted to blame my one son who has a habit of picking things up, as he likes to twiddle things in his hand, thus things are always moved around, as he is blamed, where none of this back chat matters as it is all blame and spite, and the real action that caused the problem was that I was not here, walking in common sense of what was on the ground as I pushed the lawn mower, so there was/is no one to blame but myself as even this is pointless, because all that is needed is for me to be here in common sense and not off dreaming in and as my mind about “whatever.”
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand to what extent I am a energetic mind and not one and equal to life here, physically here, with the only thing I can actually deal with in any given moment, which is being here, breathing, moving in common sense with this instrument of life that is my human physical body, expressing myself here, with life, this physical world, as this is what is real and not the desires, wants and needs, emotions, feelings and opinions , in and as my mind, and if I really take a good look at what i am as mind I will see, realize and understand that the mind is of a limited story line, that bears no witness to what is actually physically happening in this world, as the character personifications are ideas of more than and less than, fear of loss and desire to gain in a game of survival called capitalism that we have all accepted and allowed to be an impression of what life is, when this is not what life is, as many entities, as expressions of life on this planet are not considered and thus abused, thus we are not working with what is here, and within this we have no idea how these things were created as mind, and yet we assume dominance to and towards that which we have no understanding for, where the simplicity of this is so easy to understand and demand that we ask ourselves what we are in fact doing assuming supremacy when we have no clue as to what created this existence, in and as the limited minds we have allowed ourselves to exist as.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to want to become the character of self pity, to allow an emotion of self pity, where i believe I have been mistreated, unloved and picked on as though some supernatural force has come and purposely caused my lawn mower to break, which is really a mind fuck and myself not being here, looking at what is actually physically here, and within this I realize that this is what has been taught, myself to exist as a superstitious, scared, helpless human, when in fact this is not what i am, I am life, one and equal to what is here, and thus there is no one, no object to blame, nothing to point the finger at, as it was me allowing myself to exist as my mind, a program of no awareness of this physical world, as I accepted and allowed myself to not be aware of the grass and the ground, thus it is not to blame myself either, but to realize that all there is is breath and being physically here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to Also go into the character of a woman, where I have the back chat , in self pity, that there should be a manly man here to deal with this lawnmower, where I then have back chat to and towards blaming men that I have known for not being here to do what men are supposed to do, which is a belief and not myself actually being here, looking at what is here, realizing that the lawn mower is a machine  and meant to cut grass, and that it functions in a certain way, and if I run over some rope, and the rope gets caught in the blade arm, and pulls on this in an opposing manner, then it will probably break the machine, so thus there is not need for a man to explain a machine like this, I can see, realize and understand that when the blade no longer turns the full circumference, and drags at one point that something has been bent in some way, and thus to fix this is probably more than the machine is worth, as products are made so cheaply now and labor is costly, the only solution is to buy a new one, which as we can see, our system is focused on profit and image and within this, the image thing is that I have to make my house look presentable within established norms because this is the picture wanted in this world, where it is probably better for the grass to be long, as the wind moved the blades as the form of the grass and this allows interaction between the air and the soil, and actually cleans up pollutants in the air as the bacteria in the grass break down the pollutants, thus this whole scenario is not what is best for all.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to seek a feel good situation in talking about how everything I am doing in mowing the lawn is not what is best for all, when what I was, within that moment of mowing was not being here, equal and one to what I was interacting with in the first place.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to begin to worry about money, as my washing machine is broken as well and I start to worry about spending money on repairs, where i have been in situations like this before and managed to use my common sense and get through them, thus this is what will be walked and within this allowing myself to realize a situation where such mechanical break downs, as they are a part of life at the moment, will not be so overwhelming.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that I had already mowed most of the yard, and it is only a small part to be done, thus since it is Fall and the grass will grow more slowly, I can have someone come and finish the lawn, as this will be more cost effective for where I am at at the moment, and the lawn will probably only need to be mowed one or two more times, thus this situation is not as doom and gloom seeming as I immediately reacted as when I ran over the rope because I was not here breathing and looking at what i was in fact doing physically.


I commit myself to realizing that the only solution to this is to realize the importance of breath, to actually be here, breathing looking at what is here, and to not be following loopy imaginings in and as my mind.
I commit myself to practice listening to what is here, to being one and equal  in and as breath, to exist in common sense of what is actually physically here.
I commit myself to say stop, when and as I become reactive, and to realize all the characters I have accepted and allowed, such as the female character, the self pity character, the superstitious -abdicating responsibility character which is wanting someone else to take care of me character, the doom and gloom-worry-about-money character, the blaming-men character, the blaming-the-system character, the self righteous character, the knowing character, the whole crew of this mind stage play that is a separation from what is actually physically here, this crew a troop of whining, complaining, self interested-one dimensional-cries of energetic-non-substantive-and-able-to-direct and solve storms-in-teacups. What a fucking soap opera of illusion. What the fuck are we doing people?

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