I have had a thought come up based on recent events in my family. The thought, when walked in detail, in relation to what is a practical solution would direct me into solving the self pity of the thought, as I have allowed an emotional value, based on judgement to be included and made huge as the thought, instead of realizing the implications of the limitation of the thought as I only see my own self interest as the value attached to the thought instead of looking at the whole, as the fabric of society and what has been created as a system. In other words I place a value on the thought in relation to what I personally will gain or lose, instead of slowing down and realizing the consequences that lead to the value placed within me as the thought in self interest. The emotional value is the lens, the veil, I measure the world around me from, where the actual events - because of having done this - are not looked at in common sense creating the consequences that have come to exist. But this is another matter. Here, I am looking at what I have allowed within myself, and how this self pity is slowing me down in relation to realizing the causes of the outcome that exist as the same use of emotional value exists within each one of us that I cannot address if I am within such myself, as I can only begin to address what exists within solution if I am clear - and within this to realize that the consequences of such state of being will take the very collective, as the minds of men as same emotional self direction, to self realize a practice of considering how one has become a directive of impulsed emotional values instead of including how the physical world works in common sense, and that common sense is to move in ways that solve and do no harm, and that being a state that is directed in “ doing no harm” means to be equal to how the physical world functions, which means seeing directly, here - “ ohne” the shadow of self interest - an inner rest of judgement, of emotional values.
It is interesting, I was watching a video about using magnetics to create electron flow, and as such, to generate electricity. When the electrons are moving at a greater speed, they are cool, it is when they move slowly, as how we generate them at present, that they create heat. Are we, because we are physical manifestation somewhat the same? If we slow down into energy, as emotions and feelings, do we generate heat within our bodies that is detrimental to the physical manifestation that we are as life, which is how we exist, like we are creators, and what we allow with the very substance determines the outcome?
I have had a rash on my hands, the skin becomes hard and flakey, peels off, as though I have burned my hand in some slow manner. I even have these pimples come up on the palms of my hands that then dry and flake away. Am I somehow, becoming a slow, unequal flow within myself as the substance of myself as I allow myself to go into self pity, and justification and blame and spite as the thought that I am allowing that is creating a constitution within me that is burning the very flesh of my body, because I am existing within a bubble as an emotional value, and as such not being equal to here in common sense, where I direct myself in ways that do no harm because I am considering the physical world as me, and not some ideological entity ( I wanted to spell idiological - lol idiot logic) of value where I compare myself to others and decide that I am right and they are limited? And then I go into believing others don’t understand, and then twist this into myself somehow not being able to translate what is happening and believe that I have no value, as no ability, and move into self blame? This is my own inner smoke and mirrors show, FUCK.
I am caught up in my own juggling of smoke, of values, projected as mind, and as such am not being the solution, as this is really the only choice, which means to equalize myself to here, as the physical world in common sense, to remove my own chaos of limitation that is stagnating myself in such as way that I am actually burning the very flesh of myself, in a sort of slow motion.
So, here I an going to write out self forgiveness to this thought, and self correct, and then use this self correction to direct myself, as the very movement of myself here as a physical being as my journey to life, to becoming equal and one to and as the physical, removing the veil of separation that I have accepted and allowed, that has built the character of me, as described above, so that I can become life, which means to care and respect what I am as how I am able to be here, which is the physical, to align myself with here, which means to include here, which means to see directly, here as the physical. But, to realize that the veil of thoughts, are in self interest, manifest as emotional/feeling values that are unequal to common sense as what I am in total.
The thought is “ Why am I supposed to sort this out?”
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have the thought, “ why am I supposed to sort this out.”
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become the emotion of self pity, in and as the thought, “ sort this out.”
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that having an emotion of compassion makes me a good person, which is moving from a negative judgement, into a positive value, from self pity, that is filled with blame and spite, and into making a compassion into a positive value, that i use to define myself here, believing the value of myself is to have an understanding in a bubble in relation to my immediate world.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become a morality of good and bad within a bubble, in relation to my immediate world, instead of looking at the form of the system, and the self interest of each, that has built the system as a collective, where I am a product of such a system that has been going on for a very very long time, and exists because of self interest, such as my own, where i have defined myself through value placements within, instead of realizing the value is simply being life , here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to think that it is my responsibility to sort out the consequences of others.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that it is myself who must sort out what i have accepted and allowed to define me, within believing that emotional values define me, instead of relating to the actual physical world in common sense.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that this has been going on from day one, from the day I was conceived in the womb, and as such have had energetic movements of values within and as me as a child, come up, and that this was not sorted out, and equalized in common sense to the physical world that is what enables my expression as life, here, and as such, it is to simply realize the separation into and as emotional/feeling values that I am using to define myself here, and to see the separations into limitations and align myself in common sense, here, as I can only be here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to use compassion in self interest, within and as believing that compassion imparts some movement as having a deepness that indicates some profound understanding, when this is really a smoke and mirrors show, that even as itself will not be recognized because in all common sense it has no value within being self directive, as it is stagnant, so why would such be acknowledged and even if it were, why would such be retained when it is pointless in being actual self direction equal to here?
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to go into self pity, to not catch myself in self pity, where I stew in self pity as a belief that no one is paying attention to me, where I then blame myself as somehow not having been clear, in some way, that is ambiguous, as I did not take the time to investigate here, as what has been accepted and allowed as the system reflecting that which I became within and as me, realizing that this varies by subtle degree in each, and that even if I were to speak clearly, to walk detail, there is no guarantee that another caught in the veil of self interest will slow down to immediately consider what has been accepted and allowed as beliefs, opinions, and ideas, propelled by wants, needs and desires, which in turn are based on beliefs, opinions and ideas, as a cycle of energy manifest as emotional values that are a separation from common sense and as such none supportive of the physical body, and end up burning the flesh, consuming it, and destroying the gift of the physical as life, the means of expression as how life would be and do in all common sense, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become self pity, within and as me.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that my so called “ compassion” is not understood.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to take the reactions of others personally, and to not see realize and understand in the moment the separation from common sense, and that even pointing out the emotional values is not being within and as a solution as a movement that enables self direction within as I would want for myself, as this is all I can be and do, because the only choice is to be equal and one to and as the physical here, and as such that what is best for myself is what is best for all, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that directing against emotional values , that standing equal and one in common sense here, is being inconsiderate of another;s emotions and feelings, where in common sense it is the only choice, to slow down and to breath, and to equalize here, and then to walk as a movement that considers practical common sense, even within saying “ I don’t know, lets look at this in detail, in practical common sense to build a better understanding and then take the time to make decisions.”
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to also, within this, to desire to be morally correct, which is the righteousness character/personality in and as me, as what I accepted and allowed as a desire to win points in a system that is one of survival where point gaining means gain and value creation in a hegemonic system of hierarchy.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to, within this, not see, realize and understand that I fear the future, and as such also fear death, when this is in fact the opposite of life, and as such, to let all of this go, and remain, equal and one in common sense until it is done, and the value of self as life is realized within the social fabric of men, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to reprimand myself, in self pity as though I have done something wrong and to then become an emotion of hopelessness.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that chaos of limitation that I have accepted and allowed within and as myself here, as the conscious, sub-conscious and unconscious mind.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to imagine death and economic instability.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to imagine, the converse, as righteous drama, where I gain value in the eyes of others, where it is to simply say no to this, and slow down and breath, and move myself as information that takes the time to investigate what does no harm and what gives as I would like to receive, realizing that this is the only solution and that even being this principle in thought word and deed, gives a structure that is stable, constant and self directive, and allows me to move with ease, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe the illusion of self interest as energy, as realizing what is best for all breeds a constancy, that is eternal, and stable, and that this ease, lives here, as constant cross reference to physical reality, as the only place to “ fall’ is here.
When and as I find myself defining myself within a win and lose situation, within and as me, I stop, I slow myself down, and I breath, and I assess the physical in common sense, and I remediate, even if it means more time is needed, and I direct myself through building understanding in common sense, as myself being equal and one to here, being in self discovery with here, walking the chaos of separation that is of limitation, until stability in common sense as that which gives self direction that is stable and lived with ease, as I would want for myself, and I breath until this is done with each step I take here.
When and as I find myself with the thought, “ why am I supposed to sort this out” I stop and I breath and I see realize and understand my separation from practical reality, from the physical, and I slow down and assess what I am accepting and allowing, and I breath, until I am stable, at ease, here, and I look at the information, within and without as what has been accepted and allowed and I walk what is the principle of what is best for all, as it is here that solution exists.
When and as I find myself becoming inferior to here, I stop and I slow myself down and I breath, until I am at ease, and I realize the spite and the blame as the habit of myself that I have accepted and allowed, in fear of being defined as less, or in fear of losing some personification in a desire to win, and I see realize and understand that past as the morality taught in a bubble, as not being all bad or good, and I reference the physical world, with forgiveness, to see realize and understand, through self discovery, what is a movement that is best for all.
When and as I find myself moving as a belief, as an energy of self pity, I stop and I breath and I slow myself down, and I remind myself that self pity is not myself focused here, seeing directly here, where it is only here that I can assess, and then remediate, within and as a common sense as a practice of informing myself of what is best for all, as the principle of give as one would like to receive, here.
When and as I find myself moving into the habit of compassion, I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down, and I investigate the practical reality of being a physical form as life, and how I separate into value judgements, and I self correct through self forgiveness until I am equal and one, at ease here.
When and as I find myself feeling uncertain, I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down, and I see, realize and understand that I was born into a world where I was at the beginning of myself as life, small and that I did not have the practiced means of structure to communicate or understand what existed and moved within and as me, and as such that I can blame no one, for what I am, as the only solution is to become in common sense of that which enables myself as life here to exist, which is the physical.
When and as I find myself moving into self righteous morality, I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down, and I see realize and understand that the only choice is to be at ease, here, as this is how I can cross reference, remediate, and assess what is here as in including the physical in form and function, in practice of expression as the means of expression is the physical, to see realize and understand self direction in ways that do no harm, here.