Ego will never grasp the simplicity of self forgiveness. Bernard Poolman
Many times when I find myself solving a problem, the solution is there in a moment, it is of a common sense awareness, and it comes with ease. I respond with a sense of awe, wondering how and why I did not see something so simple in the first place. This happens a lot within the Desteni I Process.
This happens so often, that when I am not humble and at ease, moving here in this way, I have once again allowed myself to become the chaos of the mind. I am moving within a very very limited awareness, as I allow myself to follow a very limited construct that has become a concrete abstract of reality. It even uses the very substance of reality, as the physical to exist.
This happened yesterday. I had a fear, and idea, a theory about something I had to do. I began to “ think” about it, but not in relation to a practical common sense. Finally, I decided that I could only walk reality once I was within the situation I had allowed ideas built from uncertainty, as fear, to begin to infiltrate my being, here.
Interesting, that as I write this out, I am suddenly heavy with tiredness, just as what happened yesterday when I got to this point of letting my picture show go, and realizing that I can only address the situation in reality. Also, to note, that I had the practice and the principle of what is best for all as my framework.
This tiredness does have a thought, here, it is “ I am tired of trying to explain..” Behind this, is a memory of trying to explain in so many ways, forgetting within this that learning to explain something in very simple ways takes time. Also, that I have to explain from experience, meaning real live practical experiences that I realized I had moved in a way that was in separation from what is simple, which is what is best for all. Always, there was division and ideas of losing something within a limited measure, a limited paradigm, a PARA digm that i had accepted and allowed within and as me. The tick tock of the pendulum from weighing and measuring the good and the bad, the “ what if” based on a picture within a system that is the same separation from reality. This chaos, through division into more of less, used values to determine choice, when that moment of simplicity, is found standing outside of this chaos of division into good and bad. This means to realize the physical world as the real sound expression. This physical world’s sound expression when left to itself , without a human consciousness mind-made-bigger-than-reality-consciousness, will naturally organize itself, balance itself, so it is here, in the real world that I see and can become symbiotic with what is me, the same as me, here. And this is the inclusion of all that is here, accepting all life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have the thought “ I am tired of trying to explain.”
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become my mind only, and to believe that there is only an either/or outcome of win or lose.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to compare within a measure of win or lose.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to, from this point, go into self judgement within a limited criteria of what is good and bad in relation to how I look, how I speak, my capacity based on my past of an innerstructure that I relate to as a late/past measure of what defines success according to a system of inequality where I slow down and I breath, and I stabilize into what is the real value, which is myself participating, equal and one to the very sound of life here, which moves with the absolute purpose as a function information of what is best for all.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to be ashamed of myself for not considering all life as me, with each thought, word, and deed.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fault myself, which is myself as a starting point in default of realizing that what is here as the physical is the means of my existence is the sound as the formation that moves in practical ways, on which I impose a limited construct as the very being of myself in a state of separation where I place value on limited aspects of multiple expressions of life, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to exist as an idea that I am not good enough, and as this to go into self pity, the pit of self as mind, operating within a limited measure manifest as a vapid , a vapor that is destruction instead of creation, a smoke and mirrors show, a valley of good and evil, that I allow as a mind consciousness system.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see realize and understand that in fearing, inferring such insight as what existence is, as mind, I am in essence, not equal and one with and as myself as life, here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that if I fear facing the storm of separation in others, I am accepting and allowing a fear of loss of what is a construct of limited values of good and bad, as I have allowed to define me, which is myself not looking here, seeing the patterns of separation, and as such myself not existing within common sense, and as such, this physical movement within and as me, becomes a heavy physical sensation of an inequality with that simplicity and humility that moves with ease, here, and as such, finds solutions and the directive capacity that is equality and oneness with and as life here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that this default state of being, as mind, has no directive function because it is clouded by a fear of making a mistake, which is in itself an abdication of equality and oneness with and as the physical, and myself projecting based on a past as the details that build the judgement that does not move with the sound information of the physical that is life, here, of which I as life an one and equal to and as.
When and as i find myself becoming tired, I stop and I breath, and i slow myself down, and I see realize and understand that I can only face separation from common sense, and realize the patterns of separation as the voice of separation, as a separation is always on the lookout for reunion with the loss and/or looking for the loss as a gain, and as such visible, and able to be called out by name and realigned into solution as self discovery within and as the principle of what is best for all, here.
When and as I find myself having the thought of “ I am tired of explaining” I stop and I breath and I slow myself down, and I see the that i am allowing the word “ explain” as an idea become bigger than actual common sense participation with and as life, as I can only have an explanation in the moment, here, thus the idea of explaining, I have accepted and allowed as an entity within and as me, that I am carrying as a burden, having allowed myself to become overwhelmed, which is myself in separation from common sense as that which can exist in simplicity, as equality and oneness here, where solutions are found that are stable and withstand the test of time here.
Within this, I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have the thought that explaining something is tedious and as such a burden.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become this ambiguous idea that explaining is difficult.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have a memory, as a measure of myself here, of which I have allowed to become an entity as a self definition as a belief, that becomes a burden as this state of being I allow within, as what directs me in the moment here, slowing down the common sense ability of myself that can only walk the details of practical living, step by step, here.
When and as I find myself believing that explaining is tedious and a burden, I stop and I breath, and I do not define myself as an idea as my past, and I realize that self correction takes practical alignment, here, in common sense of the physical reality, and that the solution is always right there in front of me, and can move with ease, thus it is only what I accept as mind that is the separation, here.
When and as I find myself fearing the reactions of mind, I stop and I breath and i slow myself down, and I see, realize and understand that reactions as mind, are a definition that is ambiguous, and that this when used to define must deconstruct to reconstruct, which is a process that at times will react to change, and as such that reactions are objections to change, of which the only solution is to walk through with humility and patience, here. as what is allways the only way and means of life, is life itself, the expression, the creation of which, is to exist within and as what is best for all.
When and as I find my self becoming heavy within and as my head area, I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down, until I am stable, and breathing with ease, I realize that the process of remediation, as the me-sure as mind, is in a process of change, and reformatting to walk in equal measure with practical physical reality, where I become the directive principle, equal and one to and as life here, and within this, that a speeding car, has to slow down and turn, when changing from a high speed and that that turn appears to be a loss, a nonmoving moment, but in essence this is a movement that is not a value, simply a movement, a transformation from separation into common sense as mind structure.