The separation from existence in the resistances to the real story.
I can see when I resist. I can see this because I fear telling the real story, and instead I hold onto the lie. I know when I lie because I resist the real story. I see this when I react, whenI suppress expression as a movement when I fear losing a friend, or losing a job, or losing being accepted by a group of friends. My motivations as what I allow to direct me, in every move I make, reveal what I resist, and where I fear being clear. This absence of ease, and the tension of fear are me knowing where I am not telling the real story.
Yesterday I was with a friend and we sat for a moment looking at the roaring ocean, A man came and stood on the hill in front of my car, becoming a part of what was in the previous moment only a view of the ocean. My friend became annoyed and started to complain about that man having to stand right there in that moment.
This man moved away, and another man came and stood in the same spot. My friend suddenly said. ‘ Huh, I was so annoyed by that other man, and yet this man is not bothering me at all”
This friend of mine has had a stroke and is now trying to reclaim movement in the half of his body that has become paralyzed from the stroke. I have to ask myself why we begin to self monitor when something has gotten to the point of devastation in our lives. Why do we begin to look at our reactions to things, our lie-by-omission stories within, that are filled with resistances about and towards things in the world around us that are the same ‘ dust’ as us.
This moment revealed that we are aware of our resistances. It shows how our resistances to things - and ideas can be things - we can realize in the very movement within ourselves. We reject things, we push them in the form of blame and spite, our voices laced with irritation and anger, onto objects around us. This act, of sound, really has only the power we give to it. It cannot touch us, unless we accept it. At times, we can use this, accept such dramas to detract attention away from ourselves, or into another subject. We use this to wind a way towards our own justifications for doing the same. It happens in many measures, with many colors of emotion. The shades of grey of spite and blame; an act of labeling without realizing the real potential within everyone. This means being a mis-use of a capacity to absorb measure and create with it.
We spend our lives in such bubbles of ignorance until what we resisted accumulates and effects our bodies and the world around us, as a lack of our real potential is a kind of extinction of life. This is hidden in plain sight in our behaviors, as what we blame and spite, because projections of ideas about things onto others, objects and things is us resisting what is real as the physical world around us. We can realize this in those moments we spite and blame. This is not taking responsibility for one’s self, and being here, accepting the life around us that is what it is in plain sight.
Given that the math of what we accumulate within, effects what comes after, as the biblical math explains, what we allow as a sound within ourselves, lacking in real substance, as it is a house divided against itself, what we believe and what we sound as a measure, as a belief, opinion or idea, if it is of resistance, it accumulated within us, and is passed down. From generation to generation we sound forward our self interest, effecting those to come. Because generation is what is generated/voiced/accepted, we give this to our children in the genes. If there is an order lacking in self responsibility, our children inherit our resistances. Or, our children inherit our lack of self monitoring, the degree of which is equal to the degree of spite and blame, as projecting name calling and label making about things and others.
This can accumulate into dyslexia, and compound into ADD and ADHD, and autism. The drugs to control this, cannot remove this, and can even compound it some more, yet in the end this is what has been accepted and allowed. We can all see this, we all know this. It does and can get to the point of running on empty. It can reverse itself, revoice itself, as each of us as well. And it is done in the same manner as my friend. We ask ourselves through questioning our reactions to things, realizing where we resist. We realize the metaphysical resistances to and towards the things in our world within ourselves. We forgive them, we use the gift of sound, the gift of life, and we sound anew what we are within ourselves. We do this before that stroke, we do this before our children bear the consequence of what we sounded. And why, because blaming a child for not seeing directly, is not an act of seeing directly, it is more of the same that has a consequence of paralyzing the within, the body, that then has a long road to recovery.
It is time to discover ourselves as life. To discover through questioning our allowances. This is gifting ourselves self responsibility, to be able to stand in every moment, never carrying a lie, and standing equal and one to the potential of life within ourselves. Remember, we see what we do, we know- so great is our capacity to sense the world around us.