Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Day 624 my imaginative perceptive lens of values separating me from the practice of living a physical life.

I had a dream last night where I was kissing someone while here were people all around me. Lately, I have been asking myself how I can connect with people more than I am currently able. In this journey to life, I slow down and look at how I moved myself, what thoughts directed me, that I had impulsed into my physical behavior, and what in turn came to create my personality. This is what I repeated, that because of the way I learn, through spaced repetition, became what I interpreted around me to define me, using a set of values that bordered my existence as my experience, limiting me from connecting. The paranormal fantasy of the imagination, in turn, shows the value system imagery to create the way for me to move forward with the information impulsed into it again and again. I think of the media and how ‘ love’ is impulsed, intimacy being something connected to a relationship more than other kinds of intimacy. I mean, I live here, and am intimate with all life, it is not a one-size-fits-all state of being. When I look at the physical as what I am here, and the same that surrounds me, it is all physical, thus, when I am not of this imagination only, I can become intimate with life, because what surrounds me, is me. The physical world is life, it is creation. The ideological dividends and borders held in check through a systemic design, are the dividing means to occupy attention from what is real, as some wanted to play god, and accumulate wealth to control, instead of realizing the value is being life as the physical. As a matter of course, if we realized the value was life and that life was physical, and became intimate with the physical before imagination, we could order this world into heaven on earth in a short period of time.
If I become intimate with the measure of my own separation into my metaphysical imagination and can share this, then I can use my separation to describe indirectly how I lost self-intimacy with life, with the physical, and connect to this life around me, within my relationships. It is like I share the reflection of the means of my separation.
My dream is an example of how my imagination uses values as what I have accepted to define connection within a very narrow focus, the details of which give no real directive in practice within connection, with being intimate with this reality. The units of measure are of values, limited ones, ones that take a life time to correct, but a short period of time to impulse, so great is our ability as physical beings to take in information. If the information impulsed is of limited measure, creating a warped value system, because the units are not necessarily ‘ bad’ it creates a lack in perception. With investigation of life, as one lives and has to opportunity beyond say sitting in a classroom taking in knowledge and information without practical application or exposure to language, then the opportunity to expand is extremely limited, and since the first years of life are when this ability is most open, before the imagination accumulated enough in-formation to become the play out as the imagination that begins to direct,  the separation because of existing in a situation where thinking and imagining only dominates, this becomes paramount, this whole existing in imagination over reality, this physical world in which one lives. Here, that absorbent ability is mal-formed and causes mis-takes because it has little or very very limited time spent investigating the very means of existence, which is the physical. This is why punishment of lack is a crime, because it is not the action of grounding one’s awareness back into the practical application that gives a directive to the physical, spatially, directives that support what is best for that form as a man. And, ironically, this is why in the special needs community, the practice is to create interventions that ground the child back into the physical. To which I ask myself, in this moment, ‘ will measures of grounding in this community, or are these measures enough to counter the world around the child that are the means of separation from being grounded in thought, word and deed? Probably not. We become, instead, a snake eating its own tale/tail ( imagination that is of a measure of values as some parts made greater than others- the cause of separation from being grounded and stable here).

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to place one value in this physical reality as being more than another, and by value here I mean a quality, a measure, a form.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have not seen realized and understood how  what I made a value greater than another value, quality, measure, become what defined me as what I brought forward as imagination causing and accepting a very limited construct as my belief system, separating myself into a intimacy as self that was of a measure that stagnated my own connection to and as life as what I am here as a physical being.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become limited information.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to separate myself from life,
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel shame for what I have accepted and allowed, as shame is regret, and is still an idea within and as me, thus I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to be shamed of my separation, to let this go and to realize the only choice is to focus myself here, equal and one to and as the physical as this is life information, and within this to investigate this reality, to self empower the gift of life that is me as my common sense to ground myself equal and one here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand how the separation in and as me, starts in the family, as the parents are of the same separation and as this, became the measure of myself, where this overall is to forgive, and to investigate myself back into and equal with, this physical world.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become inferior to life, to use limited values to define who and what I am here, to become the memory of and as this, layered within the waters of my physical body, creating directives that cannot transpose into being life, as practicing respecting physical reality this separation causing mis-takes that accumulate in my flesh that are too big to order into direct seeing and interacting with the practice of what it means to be a physical life information, here and that become a memory occupying myself as my little heaven,  that is really just shadows on the wall of and as my mind, that veil said to need to be removed in some cultures on earth.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to realize and see, the composition of what 
I  have accepted and allowed, as my imagination, and that this is not what is real, and a limited system of values all charged with emotion and feeling, where what I reject persists because this is what I am not accepting as life.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that at present my own intimacy as imagination is the picture show of my value accumulation, as what I believe will allow me to survive in a system created by many men that at present is an extension of what I have accepted and allowed within and as me, a system that over all does not value the physical, which means does not value life, as ideas, beliefs and opinions are made greater than the practice of respectful living.
When and as I find myself lacking in the ability to connect with others, I stop and I breath and I slow myself down, and I forgive in spoken word what I have accepted and allowed as value judgements in self interest in fear of losing my own imagination as what I have focused on as being more than life here, and what I believe defines me, and I assess, as investigate what is here, and move in tandem with that which does no harm and takes that which is good as this is what sustains physical reality, the means of myself as life information here.

When and as I find myself  fearing the reaction of limitation as an imagination of some values made huge and other values rejected in fear of losing one value over another, I stop and I breath and I slow myself down and I assess what is here, to practice assessing what is here, to practice being flexible and changeable as myself as common sense, to become what can face the unexpected here, as in taking in what is here as the physical to enable myself to direct in ways that do no harm, and realize my own investigative powers with and in every moment here.

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