Monday, July 8, 2013

Day 389 Self Forgiveness on the Manner of Consciousness


I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become a machine of infinite affinity to ideas, opinions and beliefs, instead of looking with and as my self as life, breathing here, realizing the physical, equalizing this within this being myself in common sense as  myself as life, absolutely directive within the principle of what is best for all, where there is not fear, only absolute focus on being directive with consideration of all life , where all life is me and i am it.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand the limitation that objectification into a more than and a less than creates, as a separation from awareness of the physical world as me, where I allow myself to become stagnant within one dimension only, within and as my mind, as consciousness as pictures,   which is to say that I move as limited knowledge and information, which is in and as itself not good or bad, but limited, and thus a separation and thus stagnant, a suppression , which we can see is the system playing out on earth, which in totality is a separation from the physical earth, thus there is not respect for earth , for the physical, as the totality of life, as earth is not considered, and this lack of perception, this lack of depth, this lack of awareness, this separation compounds to the point where the action of the many as the physical body of a collective of men, is not respected, is not seen and realized for the life that it is, as the few that represent the outflow of each of our inner separation from life, as the physical,  simply play out the extreme of our inner accepted and allowed inner separation, thus what exists as the system of men, is the consequence of separation from life, from respect and equal consideration of all life, of all of the physical, this physical world that which is real, that which sustains us, that which sustained heaven, which is why such a statement existed that said that heaven had to be brought to earth, I mean why would such a thing be said?
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear describing the extent of separation that is the mind, composed of thoughts created and recited again and again by parents who were themselves in separation, and thus what was said was not all bad it was simply words that taught/constructed a placement on a grid that is the outward manifestation of the inner separation of the human, thus this present economic system on earth as the human, is the representation of our separation, each of us, from life into and as consciousness.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see, realize and understand that there is no ease until there is equality and oneness with and as the physical, that there is not ease until the separation into a heaven and a hell is brought back into equality and oneness with and as the physical being real, being what sustains us, being what is the value, and thus the value is all of the physical as the physical is a symbiotic world where this physical world functions as an interconnectedness, where there is no monopoly within the natural world as this will not work, because it is trying to force an idea on how earth should be from a starting point of separation into and as consciousness, as limited values, not good or bad, simply blown out of proportion, the effects of which cause a cognitive dissonance, as separation from equality and oneness to and as life here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand the the knowledge and information in and as my mind, that is an echo of the present system manifest on earth, is a lack of common sense of self as life, as same substance that is the composition of all life on earth.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the consumerism system is composed of limited values that disregard the physical world.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that believing that I have affinities to certain things, as other humans, instead of looking here and realizing the expression of life in all things as the physical is the expression of life, is myself in separation from equality and oneness to the physical world here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that when I gravitate towards something, as another person, I am in effect following what sounds like my own accepted and allowed values, as moving towards what “ sounds” as I am, what is energetically of same “ drone” of belief, opinion and idea, where the manners of the person move in specific ways, of which I compare to my own accepted and allowed manners, and thus am I following what is of like mannerism, not seeing realizing and understanding that the very movements of myself here as the physical is a collection of beliefs as values I have accepted and allowed, built according to class and race, gender and nationality, all not good or bad, yet built in separation from equality and oneness, acceptance and allowance, of respect and consideration for all of the actual physical world that is me, and example of which, was that when I was in Europe, when I lived there, in the tourist season I constantly had Dutch people walking up to me and speaking Dutch to me, and I would look at them and say that I did not speak Dutch that I was not Dutch, and the Dutch person would react in surprise and say but you look Dutch, which makes sense within my family, because my father came to America from Metz, and my mother came to America from Germany near the Dutch border, thus the past is embedded within the manners I exist as , as what was sensed and imitated from my parents as a child in the first seven years of my life, and thus i am a product of generations of collected beliefs, opinions and ideas that are of separation from equality and oneness to and as the physical, all a separation from being equal and one to and as the actual physical world, a separation from practical common sense of the physical, directly, here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I am a product of a system of separation, which as an accepted and allowed separation from the physical world, a world as a system that functions in one-dimensional living, as the beacon of the mind is a map of limited imprint, which is not good or bad, simply a selection of values then followed as what is real, creating a bubble of separation from what is real , from what sustains us as the physical world, thus consciousness is our separation, our inferiority to and as life, the gift given, to be an expression of life, the gift as the actual physical world, to become equal and one to and as creation of the expression of life as the physical, which is the only way to becoming equal and one in expression as life, here.

I commit myself to when and as I see and realize a dis-ease with  here, within and without, to stop and to breath and to slow myself down, as reaction, as a sense of vertigo, and I bring myself back here, into and as a state of ease with and as breath, and I look at the separation manifest as loss of self esteem, as a voice of blame and spite, as bitterness, as victimhood, as jealousy, as envy, as self pity,  all of which are judgement, an act of comparison, as being myself within limitation, and I direct from here, I follow through within and as the principle of what is best for all, I no longer accept and allowed an end game as idea as knowledge and information only without practical application, I bring all thought, my accepted and allowed map, into and as what is best for all, here, as this is the only choice, to be equal and one to and as the physical here, which will take practice and time, as the separations have become habits of survival, and thus must be deconstructed , seen and realized as separations, and brought back into an expression of life, equal and one.
I commit myself to seeing realizing and understanding that  the separations must be forgiven, which will then allow myself to stabilize in and as breath, to stop, slow down, the storm of the mind, and the reactions as emotions and feelings, the collection of beliefs, as a survival suit, the feelings being the good, to hide the separation as the limitation as the “ bad” as a value of one thing being more than another, where the feelings are the intensification of the bad into being considered a positive, which is really a justification for accepting and allowing the judgement of more than and less than, a resistance, a  pushing away into the conformity behavior , where common sense is suppressed, causing dis-ease with and as life, as the present system is life in reverse within a system of limitation, inequality, manifest as what exists on earth with the amount of abuse to the physical world, the behaviors of which are visible in the news, of which consciousness, if allowed, ignores, as consciousness is a tool being used as a mechanism of separation from equality and oneness to and as life, here.
I commit myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that since I have followed the map of limited values as consciousness as mind,  if I try to “hold” the perception of space here in and as myself, even down to being able to have the strength to hold tension and then releasing this tension in and as my physical body, it takes an effort, as my ability to hold and sense the physical world has not been developed as all I have done is followed a map, where i become myopic in clinging to one point at a time, as I as an instrument of life, have practiced separation, and limited common sense, thus the development of myself in using common sense will take time, as it took seven years to build enough beliefs, opinions and ideas, as images of my environment of a system of separation into a grid of inequality, that it will take time to deconstruct my own separation as what I learned from generations of such accepted and allowed behaviors unequal to the physical, to life, in totality.





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