Is sudden onset of erratic breathing normal ? Day 791

Regret, as a form of self pity.  That it is too lateness, that is a composition of sadness,  that is in itself an illusion, as the joy of self calling -out-by-name is the means to the end, to become auto-didactic, self determining. To realize the interference ( inter fear-ness) of past belief, as an emotional/feeling firewall, of protection, as not having enough information, as a limited vocabulary, as a mind filled with memorized limited storied ( ironically often through story) information, all built in separation from considering all things, as that which we know to be true in our awareness that we have separated ourselves from nature. LOOK at what a classroom is, it is a space and timing that is not of nature! 

Our systems reflect the way and the means. The agricultural system, where we need only walk down one of the normally two supermarket chains, in our areas, with middle sections filled with dead food that has a shelf life beyond the duration of our own lives. Food that can be the real medicine that is instead like the walking dead, it has no vitality. The very pesticides and fungicides lacing our food (not to mention the preservatives ) causing a blocking of essential nutrients in the plant which must have an effect on the body. 

Our education system, that sequesters children in a tele-vision box away from the actual real, physical natural world, and made to appear to be free. What is free is not free. It is an illusion.

Our health care system, where nurses believe that a reaction of a child, moving into erratic breathing is ‘ normal.” How can a sudden onset of erratic breathing be normal? It is a red flag, not something to see as normal- it, overall, is an acceptance of harm.  All a nurse/doctor/health care worker  need do is pay attention to their own breath, and realize, even if looking at an anxiety attack, that the pace and depth of a breath, changing into a more tense state, is the mark of imbalance, and not something to create and accept in one area, and yet not see within one’s self. We can always look at the self, and if the self would not want it, then why accept such in another, for another, especially a baby?  After all, waves lap against a shore revealing the barometric pressures, indicating high and low pressure areas, as something pressing down on the water.  When the waves are moving with greater intensity, there is pressure on the body. Something somewhere is inflamed, there is a cause and effect action on the overall form- intense pressure on the water, causes it is become reactive, to the extent it moves over its own boundaries and infiltrates the shores- causing , at times, massive damage .  If a breath increases, it would be within a function of purposeful action, much like an orchestra moving in synch, much like a flock of birds, moving like a wave.  Sudden, unmanaged by the body, onset of erratic breathing, is more of a red flag. To believe this is normal, is ignorance. It is an ignorance that is a state of ignoring harm, in self interest. 

Our media, a perpetual story of doom and gloom, potential apocalypse, of dystopia, of  foreboding. Always, a tension of possible worst case scenarios. A form of entertainment, as looking at something out there happening that is bad, is in itself a form of distraction, and a lack of being self responsible; that state of being focused on what is around one that is this reality.  Some people like to watch horror movies as a form of excitement and movement within- to get the juices going as an adrenaline rush, a form of a drug addiction. Can we not realize, that those of us that follow the news, are essentially the same? Do we believe that in following the news feed, as it exists today, that we are more responsible, when it is unbalanced, in being storied information that is always foreboding some harm? Do we get a rush from the adrenaline trigger as that form as that set body of colored information in emotional story, that is so formulaic, as that  measure/composition of in-formation? Is this, in following this, really a perpetual self abdication of real self responsibility, self autonomy, self determinism? When we, as parents, for example, accept when a health care practitioner  says a baby suddenly breathing in an erratic manner is normal, after a vaccine shot,  are we so unaware of our common sense, that we are not actually really looking at that being reacting suddenly with a more violent action as interrupted breathing ? Would we want to suddenly have that in ourselves? No.  If we as young children can learn to crawl, and walk, and talk without a manual, our real sensitivity is more than able to realize changes within our bodies, we need no authority to sense this, because it is, in essence the very fabric of what is our capacity. It takes a great effort to keep this state of agitation alive within- a state that is a separation from the practical ( practice all). Learning in boxes away from nature, is one of the layers that maintain this separation. 

What is an interference ( inter-fear-an-ce ) of our common sense, is it a resonant math of information?  And, it is this that separates us, from our common sense. Can this be all by design, and of a starting point of the individual?  Is not the real "light workers"  the many hands of men?  One could say, our great great great grandparents started this mis-measure. them all no longer present. Thus, to blame them, is pointless because the only possible solution is to reform the self, to allow what is actually more natural, to be allowed to exist. No one can do that but the self, and if we want to blame, and punish those we deem to have caused this, they are no longer here, so that is pointless.  Ironically, we are so often immune to our own irony, all the while, what we seek, is what we already are! 

What if humans came together, and imagined things that fit into creation? What if we gathered all that we are that is creating separation, if we placed all that effort into creating and focusing on what can withstand the test of time, would we not build a world that embraced and brought forth  the real expression of what and who we really are? Would we not move with our interrupted breath, and instead come to move in synch with the physical breath, to live that happiness, that is being haptic with a correct use of the imagination, to live within  the full volume of life? Would that not be awesome? Is that not what we all want? 

Finally, if we look to the financial system, could we not stand together, and forgive ideas that one is more than another, and realize some are actually closer to being informed in effective ways and means, and extend that to all, to open what is natural as our ability to be common sense of all things, to then,  stand and become real creators?   We must de-segment, we must realize what is the same, we must realize that we are the products of our past, we must realize that religions are storied information that is not the real story of reality.  We must change the currency flow, to allow all physical forms the basic and proper means to support this physical existence, to move it back into its potential to express in balance and real respect.   We must begin to realize that resonant interruptions that are of an energy, are something that needs perpetual validation to exist, because it has no real standing in creation, it has no real constancy, it is of no real stability.  It is that game of more than and less than, instead of practical living actions that regard all that is of what we are, and respects it, to realize it is us in another life form. 

Our words are sound. They are a geometry, as the very shape and form of the letters. The more we can call out the math, by name or realize what we sound, which is what any logistical fallacy describes, we realize movement,  in number and space and time, much like a musical song.  What we believe, what we say, what we do not say, as speak up, reveals the math of who and we are by acceptance and allowance in what we focus upon, as thought , word and deed.  

One experience I remember, is being in a room with a musician that had mastered their instrument to a certain degree. They understood where I was at, as they had heard me play. There were few words interchanged. The whole vocabulary of and as the physical body in movement, into form, like the shape and geometry of a word, was the means of expression, of communication.  It is more of a presence, of an awareness of the expression, as the forms and movements of reality with all things around one.   In all, we as what we are , that is equal to what is all around us, truly have the means to create heaven on earth.  If we listen, even the frame of a building, in a room in which we perform, determines the sound we make, and we, as our physical forms can instantly adjust to fit into the space. No metal robot, can work with such efficiency. We are, as physical beings, the most incredible means of life. We need only realize its value, and embrace what we are, stepping out of a resonant form of layered information that does not fit, is not equal to this creation- a creation that is physical and all around us -  allowing us, even in our state of separation, so great is the gift of life.  Practically speaking, this means to change the financial system, to one that guarantees all basic needs are met. It is that simple and only a step away, if we come together, and realize the magnificence of who and what we are as the very flesh of our form. 

Thank you for reading! 

Day 699 How can this be?

I am again looking at my experience within playing the violin. I remember in my thirties, especially, when  had two small children and I spent time practicing. I realized through those years that if I practiced with a part of myself resolving problems, which is myself being in my mind, then when I went to perform I had a harder time focusing on what I was doing. I had to go back and practice the piece again, to clear the emotional memory attachments from the music.

This also taught me, slowly, that the way in which I focused, of which I had control, while I practiced, was very important. I could learn something faster than is believed if I focused without sorting some issue in my life out in the back of my mind while practicing.

It also has created a situation where I sort things out in the back of my mind in other moments in my life.  

I also realize when I am doing this if I pick something up to read. The reading process becomes more difficult because I have to constantly refocus myself.

I also realize that there are moments when I naturally understand this process of being caught in emotions in others, as I have moments in the past where I was very calm in the face of emotions, and did not react, and could calm a situation, making the intense emotions small, bringing them down to size. 

I think we all have this capacity. We just need to look. There are moments when each of us have done this, not reacted to emotion and prevented a situation from becoming charged with reactions of blame and spite, want and desire, fear and survival.  We can see that instead we were that practice of problem solving leading, or remaining in a sense of ease in the community of others.

Within this, I can see where the potential for this is always present, it is always here. This is because we live in a practical physical world. The steps to get things done, are always right in front of us. What separates is from that is what we believe as thoughts, as measures about things, in our minds, our memories.

I was reading this book about education. In the book the conversation went into how the present system is formed and the limitations inherent in the design in terms of allowing a natural potential to problem solve and create in children. I found myself reacting with the words in my head “ how can this be.” This, has a charge behind it, that is more myself from the past as a child, not comprehending that something could possibly exist. It also brings up a memory that has the same colored charge; when I gave birth to my children. In both, there is this color that has the words “ How can this be!, What is this? Why does this exist!”  I must have asked myself this question throughout my life.  

It was not until I had an extreme situation that I finally turned this question into “ This is not life, where is life?” “ This cannot be life, where is it?” and “ I have to become life, no matter what.” And also the words, “ I am going to lose everything, everyone, it is going to be hard, and yet it has to be done, there is no other choice.”

LOL, I notice in this moment, that that statement of ‘ this is going to be hard’ has created a sense of this being a burden. And yet, I started this blog remembering those moments where I made small an emotional storm. In those moments, where I did not react and was at ease,  it was not hard, it just was. In these moments I was calm, and applied myself naturally, without judgement. And, this is the way to practice an instrument. This was the state I had to stand within, to efficiently practice something. 

This means overall, that if I practice, or stand here as the practice of life, meaning to always ground myself and breath here, I can accumulate a perfect practice, becoming a momentum of problem solving, calling emotions,  and the feeling that justifies the emotion, by name and downsizing them into the practical.  We can all do this. It is who and what we really are, it is the potential inherent by design in what we are as physical beings on a physical world.

What is automaticity and what is a thought?

In the education system there is something called automaticity. This is when some information, some measure about something has been ‘ owned.’ Meaning that one knows it so well, they have integrated that information.  

When a musician practices something, again and again, understanding a movement, a measure, a unit of space, that musician is automating a piece of measure, a piece of how a space is and the things used to express within space. That is practiced until it is automated, where one can ‘ zip’ file through the information so fast, they are no longer thinking about it. This can become automated, or rather , this is automation.Which means overall, we automate the information we practice.

This goes both ways, we automate what we think about. 

One thing I learned within this, within being a violinist, is that the information can be automated and if I no longer cross reference that information to check it, I lose touch with it and the information takes over. I had to learn to stand within the form, within the information as a structural guide, or the information took over and when facing something new, some new form, I would become ‘ upset’ because I was not present and using that which absorbed the information to use the information as a structure to ground me, while at the same time remaining aware. Automation is cool, because it reveals how we work, yet can be used to become a set body of information, that one has forgotten is just this, something practiced until it was understood, or accepted, and then becomes an  inner structure ABOUT reality, and something to allow processing reality, yet is never reality.

In other words, we become the measure we accept and allow. A recent example of this is a talk I had about Hillary Clinton. A woman said that she ‘ feels’ that Hilary as a woman would make a good president. Hence what is a feeling if we understand how we come to be automated with information? I ask myself, “ did that woman grow up in a feminist household” Was the ‘ information’ as the measure practiced again and again about the need for woman to be considered equal”  Did this information accumulate and become automated, and forgotten as to how this was built, to the point where the person ‘ intuits’ as a “ feeling” that we need a woman president despite any and all practical measures as to what Hillary supports or does not support in fact in reality?

Does this mean that a ‘ feeling’ is based on a set body of automated information, which is what beliefs, opinions and ideas really are?  And does this not show how the immense sensitivity of the human body, that absorbent ability that is the means of sensing space and quality and measure, and so able to take in that information, be an accumulation within as a personification of information ONLY, information running on automatic- and that information running on automatic no longer remembered to be just that, as it is so huge within us- in tandem with a lack of remembering to assess reality, or cross referencing reality, in every moment -that we become divided among ourselves, when we are the very fabric that is creation? Would this not create a waring society of personalities? Would this manifest as racism, classism, nationalism, culturalism etc. ? Do we forget then to take that which is good and does no harm, when this is what we would all want for ourselves? 

And would this reveal the real generator of the present system that controls and orders in a monopolistic way to place the separation of each of us into some form of non-destruction because this ‘ feeling’ that is information in automation has forgotten where and how the information was built? And would the so-called elite fear this body of automation that is in separation from reality and try to order it and control that lack of self understanding , and self control and self responsibility in practical cross reference of reality in every breath?

Yes.

We must forgive ourselves the trespass of a mind consciousness of information that is in separation from reality, a practice that has become automated. We are, all of us, basically moving as automated information that has forgotten reality, forgotten to cross reference reality, as the physical world.  We can begin by asking ourselves “ What is a feeling?”  “What is an emotion?”

“ What is the automated information that is me?” “ What am I generating?” What am I placing within me as the information that is me, and am I passing this information down to the next generation?” “ What is a thought?”  What is that information doing to my children?” “ Are they having to sort out what I did not sort out?” “ What legends of information am I leaving for the life that is here on this earth?”

If we want to realize out natural ability to absorb and understand, as this is what and who we are as the very gift of presence as life within us, we can begin by realizing what information we have accepted and allowed to define who and what we are and ask ourselves where that information came from, and what it is generating. We have to begin by asking ourselves where we have ignored reality in how we have automated information that we express, believing that information within -which is never the real information, as the physical - to be what defines who and what we are. A personality that could be disorder from what is real as physical states of being, on a physical world from which we absorbed knowledge and information. It is time to become practical, to cross reference reality, to assess what is real, as the world around us, and the information that is not equal and one to respecting the physical in every moment , in every breath.

I would begin by asking yourself, “ What is a thought?”

Check out DIP Lite. A free course to begin to realize how emotions and feelings are generated and to walk a process of understanding who and what we are. 

Day 538 Self Forgiveness Arguing Limitations

 Yesterday I had a lot of back chat coming up. I would notice this and then find myself in another scenario, an imagination in my mind. Each time, I was like a victim, but arguing, as in justifying my stance. It went from explaining things to a family member, which I forgave and then stopped, only to find the same thing happening about a disagreement with a neighbor.  I forgave this, and then I went into a “ what if” scenario. By the evening, I began to notice this pattern within myself, myself the victim and the world needing something explained. 

At the moment I have some decisions to make that are taking some time. And, I am learning how to speak with others in ways that I have not directed myself within using a specific kind of structure. Within this, what is interesting is that my music background keeps popping up. I begin to see everything like a movement. Like a multidimensional movement, and then I want to explain all of this. But there, within this, remains this defensive approach, as my patterns are showing me, my starting point is from myself believing i am a victim, which means I am not standing equal to what I am presenting, because there remains this sense of not being understood, or being a victim, which also means that I feel inferior, incapable, which in turn means that I believe I hold something superior. The polarity game spinning around as an argument, imagination in and as my mind consciousness system.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to come from a starting point as a belief that i am a victim.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that I am not understood.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear that I am not understood.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to exist as an idea that i am not understood.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that I am not understood based on a past, where, perhaps this is from when I was a child and did not have the vocabulary, the inner measure as the words to explain myself in ways that were clear, and even if I did, as I was a child, that perhaps the adults would not have heard me.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to want another to stand equal to me in understanding as a starting point, instead of standing equal and one to and as the words and measure of description that I am communicating.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to use communication from a starting point of accusation, in a protection and defense manner, which make the matter that I am focused on a point of fear with an imagination of  an idea as a gain, and as such a fear of loss, of failure, instead of  common sense , here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that it takes time to reform and transform misinformation.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to go into self blame, when and as I have not had an outcome that matched an expectation.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to, within this, carry the past with me, and fear an outcome that does not meet the expectations I expect.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to then go into a self expectation that impossibility exists.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel that the misinformation of judgement within and as me, which I have accepted and allowed, is too much, is too deep, is a lot, that it is impossible for me to ever clear this up.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that I am mis-understood.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel like I have been saying something, over and over again for two years, and it appears that i can get no one to hear me, and that the fault of this is that I have too much cognitive dissonance that it is impossible for me to be able to reach others.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe , within this, that I am a hopeless case, as others have come and are in the leadership position, because I could not speak in ways that allowed others to be equal in understanding.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to  feel so confused, because I had stood in front of a group of children and thought to change the very fabric of their understanding, and what I walked with them had an immense effect, to such a degree that the reactions of the adults was one of silence, and here I am having moved into more understanding of this, and still, I have not been able to reach anyone, even when I practiced what i preach - so to speak, with positive results.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel like I stand in from of a mass of movement, and still I am not heard, within this I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have such a thought.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel frustrated when I do not even get some kind of response from another, and to have the thought that this is what is happening.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand within this that I can only be here, that a cup is a cup, and a word is a measure of here, and that this is the value of the word, in that it is a unit of measure of here, as it can really be nothing other than this.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that the emotional/feeling movement within and as me, is myself not being equal and one here, as I can only address what is the state of measure, within and without here, and that it takes time to balance out misinformation which means walking this in thought word and deed again and again until it is done.

When and as I find myself becoming uncertain, I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down, and I see, realize and understand that the fabric as the world around me, and the movement as mind as men, gives its separation away as the words spoken, and as such can be realigned in common sense of what has been accepted and allowed, in a world where men exist as energy as idea , impulsed for generations within a system of each human abdicating the within as life into limited measures of awareness of space and time, and as such creating a separation from functioning in equality with practical reality,  as the starting point was an idea of a more than, where the memory within and as the inner structure of the human, is a me sure as a me more, as a value judgement of the within picture being more real that the without reality that is what allows that within to exist, thus it is for me to stand here, within and as what is best for all, as this is what is best for self, and to see, realize and understand that in arguing my limitations, I am, as a whole, not standing equal and one here.

Day 528 I forgive myself for allowing and accepting a separation from life. The process of Equality.

I was walking my dog, and I walked past the home of someone who held an annual party. About a block after I passed the house, there I was. It was like I placed myself in a projection play-out as a fantasy. I was not even aware of the physical world around me, because I was so busy up there in my mind, conscious only of the characters in the projection. I was in the past at that annual party.

I breathed and came back down to earth. It gets so, that this is very tangible. It has a thickness to it, a slurpy thickness. So, I catch myself doing this, and it involves believing that I am defined through validation, through interaction with other characters as people.

Even within writing this blog, it is like a self validation, in putting myself out here on the net, to explain what I have accepted and allowed as consciousness, my own personal collection of qualities that i “ own” to define myself, and maintain to participate in a system so caught up in limited measure there is a separation from the physical world, which is the real life, or one could say, as much life as the limitations used to own a self definition as a belief that such is needed to survive and motivate, when none of this projection is necessary, because what is real is being here. One is or one is not, and as the “ not being” one is the being as well. 

If my attention is on a singular quality, and I practice this in a game of play-out as fantasy as consciousness, then I cannot be here , equal to the physical reality, and all of its qualities. And I do not learn the process of transformation, because I am too busy in an industry of quality gain as a self definition of character. I am too busy monitoring my gains, and reviewing them with past experiences, and thus I become a limitation, and place myself on a treadmill that I have to run on to maintain what is essentially a bully of my own personal qualities to define myself and force others to accept.

If I become too “ original” than I lose a connection, if I do not fit into a limited self definition, then other become uncomfortable because they have a hard time placing me in a box, because in this limited quality definition as character,  as a game plan, other characters want to define each, in order to have that projection working. Thus, any judgement of me by another, really tells me more about them than it can about myself, and conversely, judgements by others, where I react in any way, tells me about myself. In this game of energy, one cannot even suppress a reaction, because the very substance of energy, is thicker than water, like to say, oil and vinegar do not mix, you can shake it up, but still they don’t mix. There is no way out. To appear to mix, an agitation is necessary, and agitation has a vibration to it, which means a movement, which is visible, and to ask myself a question here, the focus of  self validation and as such gain, cannot hide from silence. It is like silence hears everything. A seeming contradiction for one busy in a projection as consciousness.

So, when I am projecting I have to come back to the starting point of silence and listen to equalize myself to what is here as the physical to listen and then direct myself as this is how I hear what is here, and enable myself to consider all that sustains this moment in time as myself in expression as life.

So, when I move myself into consciousness, that is a story of my past, in a system of survival, using limited qualities and ignoring all of this physical creation, I must stop and breath and slow myself down, to learn to address myself as life, in order to move here, in ways that do no harm.

Nothing can define me but what i accept and allow. And I am here, even when I am not here. lol

When I go into projection, it is like an intensification, and a funnel into that projection, one moves up into this, like one is filing a bubble. And that bubble is filled with pictures, streaming through the eyes. And the lining of the tube, is like a staff of keys that are the triggers that when sound moves through them, ignites the construct of the key, and the keys are built of the past, and so the past sings - so to speak- and the game begins, the comparison, the self justification as self using pictures to define and maintain what self is. All of this built from a system that has become the manifestation of this construct as consciousness. Well, helium balloons get to a certain height and then they pop, and all the gas is released and sent back into the substance of what is here. So one eventually comes back to earth, back to the physical. 

Within facing what has been going on in my heart, I realize that when I become what we would call “ nervous” I am not here, I am not facing he separation from self, I am not directing what is the capacity of men, the natural learning ability of men, to be aware here, to see directly here, to consider how this physical world is a construct of creation, all of it, and that as we stand in this moment, has a construct on top it, that is a consciousness, a science of a collection of limited qualities, or values, used to define a human, in an order of survival that is the outward manifestation of an inner self definition accepted in separation from self as a physical manifestation which is what one can use as a starting point of form and function, as expression, in tandem with all manifestation to understand how creation works, thus each part needs the other parts in cross reference to give direction, one does not need to direct from the idea alone, one moves with the physical, like flocks of birds do at times. It is the joy of being aware in full sensory motor skill that the physical allows that directs in real creation, as it is here that one can be aware. The two happen at the same time.

In this one gives up all belief, to gain everything, thus nothing is really lost in giving up the mind consciousness system. That doom and gloom feeling in change, is simply giving up a limitation, and the habit of that limitation, appears to be a death, when it really is like a birth.

So, when ever I find myself in a projection that uses the past, as a conscious self definition, I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down and I return myself here, equal and one with the physical world, and I take that which is good and does no harm and I stand equal and one with the physical to see, realize and understand myself as a physical human on a physical planet and as such I respect the life that is here that is me, and I realize that a system of separation has been accepted and allowed and constructed in the image and likeness of my own accepted limitations, that must come back to the realization of itself in total as life, here and as such align itself/ myself equal and one with the physical.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to compete within and as a story in and as my mind, in and as a projection as an interplay of limited qualities/values where I measure in very limited reference as ideas thereby separating myself from the joy of simply being here as this competence is a cognition of limited means, creating externalities that experience extremes of lack either though physical discomfort, or physical comforts that become a burden believed to be a gain, that in itself is ownership that ends up costing the life to focus on protection and defense of what cannot be taken in death.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that I am defined within a limited measure of myself, and as such am not allowed to be and have a certain measure of common sense of the whole as I must limit myself to allow others to feel comfort in pegging me into a limitation to enable a self definition, which is respecting a limitation, and as such is a disrespect of life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that I an not allowed to express beyond the limitations of what i am based on limited criteria as a self definition being owned by others, which by some invisible ideological belief is supposed to be adhered to, when this is a limited projection as a self definition and as such a disrespect of life that must come to an end.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that because I do not look a certain way, I cannot smile and be joyful as this is only allowed within a narrow construct where women that fit within a very narrow idea of beauty are allowed to smile and place themselves within this behavior to flirt with the ego of men who themselves are in a very narrow self definition of themselves as life, here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel that there is no way out, and within this to see, realize and understand that there are those who react to a person standing outside of proscribed accepted norms that in themselves are limitations that have nothing to do with being life here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to conversely, use knowledge and information of a limited value system, and the memories of my past, to be a directive here, when all of this is a limitation that is not self transcending into awareness, but a self that is existing within a projection as consciousness self constructed, self accepted, self allowed, and as such a separation from that what one seeks, which is self as life, that can only exist in equality and oneness to and as the physical being life, which is simply to accept all that is, as all that is is life, here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to measure myself based on limited values only, and as this be caught in a energetic web of organization which is using the capacity of myself as a playful “ worker” as a physical being-ness, within a very limited construct that consumes and devours the very substance that is me as life where I turn as colorless as a wick and die having taken the substance of life, the color of life, and burned this in and as a projection in and as consciousness instead of becoming aware, and as such one and equal to and as the physical world, to address myself equal and one with and as creation.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that I cannot be transparent here, equal and one to and in common sense of the physical, using auditory gifts visual gifts , kinesthetic gifts as the physical to own the value being life here, where i stand equal and one with all life, realizing that the physical is life, as all that is, is creation and as such to be respected.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see realize and understand that I am here and that it is here that allows me to exist as life, and to interact with all that is life in formation here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to feel that life has passed me by, and as such I do not have the opportunity to be life here, and also to believe that i don’t deserve life, when in effect this is more of the same that lead to separation from the physical as life, as punishment and reward are based on values judgements and not the measure of the means to equalize self to and as life here, as this is the only thing that humans can own that can withstand the test of time, and remain constant, and as such realize what is eternal, which is the expression of life, which is creation, and as such to be enjoyed by all, and as such the cross reference gift that stabilizes self as life.

When and as I find myself existing within a projection I stop and I breath and I slow myself down and I realize what i fear losing, as what I am pushing away as a value, creating a good and a bad, a more than and a less than, a belief in superiority and inferiority, and I bring this back to self, and I realize what I fear losing as what I have allowed as a self definition, and as such a rejection of life, and I realize the expression of myself as life that i have rejected, that I fear may mean a loss within a system that is a loss of life, as I see realize and understand that this loss is an illusion.

When and as i find myself fearing competition, I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down, and I see, realize that it is to include all that is, and to transform what is essentially a fear of loss, into a way and means that accepts all externalities as an ambition that is ambiguous to what allows the innate capacity of life to diverge equal and one to the physical, and to see, realize and understand this in accord of a direct seeing of what is same in all creation, which is life, as this is the value and that as this, one can cross reference with respect to all life, which includes the physical, to become self directive, self responsible, and to realize that because this is not how men have existed in earth, and for which earth has been created, to realize that this equalization to life, will tale a process, and that a mis-take is a gift of myself as life to balance myself here, equal and one to become equal and one with the sound of life, as that of a functional purpose of what supports life in-formation as this is the gift of creation.

When and as I find myself existing within and as a projection as mind consciousness, I see, realize and understand that this is a righteousness, that is an anger, that is a bullying, that is a fear of loss, that is a limited value believed to define me, and I stop and I breath, and I slow myself down, and I forgive this narrow focus, and I bring myself back here, and I let this emotional/feeling energy go, and I see the thought and forgive it, and I look to the objection of it, as it manifests in a judgement, as a protection and defense usurious action, movement within, as I see, realize and understand that the solution is allways, always, equality and oneness to and as life, here, within and as the principle of what is best for all, which is what does no harm, and gives the gift that keeps on giving, enabling self directive capacity and self responsibility, to here.

The process of deconstruction, to bring the pieces of self back together in equality and oneness to and as life, here. DIP Lite. FREE

Day 468 Solicitation, TPP and Protest Laws. As Within So Without.

Someone said to me the other day , “ I don’t want to be solicited.” I stopped, this was a new response that I had not encountered. I looked at the man and said, “ how does one person speak with another, reach out? A person has to address people and through speaking bring what is new to them, for them to hear, it is how it is done, in all simplicity.” The man was not reactive, he did not bully, he simply looked at me with calm.

 But there, within me was a movement, initially, not, as I responded immediately, in calm, but as I spoke I noticed a tension, which was a fear, a reaction. As I spoke,  the common sense of what was physically happening as in a moment of communication with another I realized that the fear, as the inner uncertainty that was a warning based on some idea had no relevance in the moment. If anything, this fear was a pulling back within myself that protected and defended my action based on a belief that I could be labeled and judged and that this would remain with me, when such could not because I can only be here, in this moment. 

There is also a fear of standing as a directive structure, to stand through being a feminine person acquiescent as a belief within an accepted societal norm that really has no substantial responsibility within being here. If anything, one can only connect with that which allows self as life to move/flow/hear with ease and within this to remain steady as this. 

This is moving equal to common sense, to life, as is our natural ability as life as what we are, as self in absolute purpose within being aware of here, as what is best for all. Which in essence means communicating with one another, and realizing that we are only as good as the parts, as all of existence, around us. There is no other choice, and this is not an impossible choice, it is actually the easiest thing to be and do, if we only accept and allow this to be. The irony is that we, through believing that there is more than here, as idea as mind,  are existing in separation as judgement and not seeing what is here as what it is absolutely and the behavior of this is our state of confusion that appears complicated when it is not.

Our emotions and feelings that are the accumulation of thoughts that are a judgement based on an idea of one thing being more than another - which is what a survival game would be, where money has been allowed to determine life, -builds our characters, our cares, and becomes the program driving our wants, needs and desires, all of which in essence serves a machine of division/complication/suppression. The data going in serves the structure of judgement of having measured physical reality as being unequal, forcing hierarchy, a false god built on what is real beneath it, the real sustenance. All the while the gift of life is physical creation, giving equal measure of life to all as the very substance of what is the physical to allow equal understanding.

Interesting that, as I understand, the new TPP,  or Trans Pacific Partnership, is proposing keeping data secret, which is to say keeping justification “ secret”, and also, writing laws that punish protest. So, what is happening  within this structure of inequality is what we are doing within: our manifested expressed emotions that are the programs of accumulated judgement that we have accepted and allowed: beliefs that one thing is more than another: Our emotions and feelings hiding the thoughts that are the accumulation of a data  collection of values in self interest. These things that are supposedly more than values  really are of a limited selection of values and obeying them has taken from us our ability to stand in common sense, equal to life which we can see manifest in the cumulative acts based on our accepted/selected inner program/judgements/data as the amount of destruction happening to earth. 

And now we are proposing to not even be  allowed to protest our own demise, self created at that.  And so we live our own stagnation. We are slowly but surely leading ourself to our own stopping point, our own end. We are moving back, physically, to nothing because we refused to stand equal to life, which is the absolute purpose of common sense to be aware of here, and to do no harm, which is how one can equalize oneself to life, to the physical, and it would be  really fun thing to do, but instead we chase a separate program as the mind of limited values causing all manner of conflict because these values are based on ideas of good and bad and not what is the gift of structure to realize self as life as the physical world. It is right here in front of us, and yet we refuse to see that the physical world is the gift of life.

The physical is the  training wheels to equalize self to life. All those little atoms that compose a structure of life, so we can really “ play” and express ourselves as life.

And so much so, are we in self abdication that we manifest a law that disallows and punishes protest - in this case, the destructive pipeline that profits only a few at the expense of plants, animals, humans and water, and air on which we depend to be. 

Just as the law of profit takes everything, all consequence from not having considered all outflows, and turning the damage into a new profit making venture so can we as a collective take our mistakes and turn them into a good, as what is best for all. In the law is the answer: To no longer protest, and instead to stand as what is best for all, as in standing and placing/supporting a structure - in this case one that builds sustainable practices bypassing/redirecting the effort as our own impetus to protest, eliminating it as in  building something new with that movement through redirection within a sustaining principle.

We can, from within,  slow ourselves down and use our common sense and realize our thoughts of judgement have accumulated creating emotions and feelings that when looked at have no real value and can thus be self forgiven to bring ourselves here, to what is real, realizing that our past does not define us unless we accept and allow it. For this one can also walk the tools of self forgiveness writing and corrective application offered in a free course called DIPLite. It is a process to equalize self to life, as it was a process to build that concrete GPS system that was based on limited values that obeyed a god of profit in self interest which was a starting point of separation from self as life, but that which took that step is what is self as life, and it is there and can be redirected by self as self as life, here. The shift from following to self directing may seem impossible but it is not, and it will take practice but it can be done.

This is a process of walking the ordinary, a structure of order, that creates a supportive extra-ordinary earth that can become what realizes that the exception is the norm. Living Income Guarantee will accelerate this process because it will remove many of the behaviors of survival because money has been allowed to determine life  as what is here is what enables us to become equal to life. This is the gift of the physical world. It is your birthday present. 

Day 413 limited values create the unknown

I have had problems with my back. It is not visible with the naked eye, per say, it just starts to hurt. Much, much better than when it really started about three years ago. At that time, it became like solid rock one day, and I had to spend time in bed because I could not move, it hurt so much. Self forgiveness would clear it at times, and then I realized that I had to direct myself. It is like learning to balance the within, of which will take practice. Like for instance, sitting here writing about this starts to clear this up, it is moving all the time.

I had spoken to Bernard about this, and he said that it took him many years to figure this out. Now that he is dead, I can’t get direction from him, but this does not matter, because it is me that must figure this out, and with the words, “ it took me many years to figure this out” the message is pretty clear, I have to figure this out. What I notice at this point is the heavy syrup thing coming down from my mind, and the suppression, or rushes of energy coming up from my solar plexus. Somehow these things must work in equality here. To go into the detail of how the mind as thoughts accumulate into emotional/feeling energies, to slow down and name, then to stop this action of separation from here, where all spatial sense of the physical is, as capacity of the human as what we are - like a tree  on the landscape doing what the form and function of a tree does, where no one tree is more than another tree as there is no hierarchy of trees unless they are organized into some system through value placement by men. A hierarchy of trees is pretty silly. So why do we have a hierarchy of men? Why are we not taught to work with  physical geometry, in common sense? Why do we have superstitions of lack of awareness, a limited awareness, a separation from common sense of physical reality? Why do we allow a system where all principle, all real value is slowly dripped towards single ownership, this monopoly game placed on a physically common sensical world? Why do we allow a media saying partial truths over and over again where it becomes supposed fact when in all common sense the behaviors promoted, such as porn, are obviously a distortion of reality causing addictions that make no sense within being aware of physical reality? What are we doing that is perpetuating this abuse, do we blame, do we spite? Do we regret, to we self pity? All of this when what is real, and practically able to be understood, is right here in front of us? Why are we using resources to send a false message instead of developing ourselves to be able to move here without negative values, as judgement, placed as what we sound here, as our words? Why is there so much friction and conflict in our relationships?

I have been taught the measure and weigh things according to a limited system of values, that feed a hierarchy of inequality, and the separation creates confusion that is registered as complexity, a compound interest is then created as what i have allowed is not equal to life, it is out of balance with common sense. As this I give the life of me away, reject life, for a lesser value, a singular value, a limited value. My self interest, as idea, as mind, as consciousness, as a picture, that is of limited structure, and thus, if I use this to direct myself in the world, the physical world, I run into all kinds of conflicts because I am forcing a limited concept of life into a physical world that is the real value and this is why it is physical, because it is the real value. We humans are in separation from the real value, as what is creation. In separating ourselves from what is real, we have forsaken ourselves as creators. We have rejected understanding the physical and the limited values we have accepted and allowed have created a mind/consciousness system that is the limited values we accumulate that cause the conflict with reality because it has not total value awareness. We are not absolute in our equality with reality. Have a look, we do not need thoughts to be here. Interesting, in the word thought, is thou ought, which is judegment, which we have been told not to do. If we learn to be spatially here, equal with the physical world, and we learn to read the actual physical, which is composed of sound and thus we can hear/here it, then we do not need ideas as our minds, to direct us, as an idea is a superstition, and we have accepted and allowed ourselves to create a paranoise of the unknown, the unknown being the pictures and ideas in and as our minds, which we use to direct us here, and project a belief system of what we are, this taught to children that come into this world naturally trying to make sense of the physical world, through touching everything, placing things into their mouths, listening, learning language, they come into this world measuring how the physical works, and we as adults place ideas of superstition into them, as our behaviors of blame and spite are based on superstition, because we thing something out there has caused our lack of practical common sense of the actual real physical world, when this cannot make any sense, because we are here, born with a gift to sense here. Thus we teach our children our own behaviors of a paranoia of the unknown, we teach our children the same separation we exist as, beliefs, opinions and ideas that bear no witness to physical reality, this that is geometric and visible and able to be sensed.

We are then, not taught that words are what allow us to create placeholders of understanding how here functions, to build a GPS within us of understanding. Naturrally, a system that is a monopoly game would not want understanding, because then the end game - of more to a few - would be realized for the abuse that it is and does as what it is by design, which admits that each of us, as humans, by design, can understand the geometery of the physical, as what we are as form and function. In a sense we are just like the cows that spend their lives in a confined cage, while we are milked of our principle economically, and then we die never understanding the ecology of this physical world that is what enabled us to be life. This is a crime beyond all measure and it must stop.

I once read that the human is capable of reading one thousand words per minute, and since we have training to develop this skill, it means that it can be done, and if the government knows this, why fear this capacity? Why limit this? And how is this known, and why is this stopped? because of an idea that one has to be more than another? Would this not allow this world to function as that tree, where all over the earth everything is working within an awareness that the physical is interconnected geometrically and that this is the value, because this is physically being life here?

Thus, in order for this physical world to function, all, everything that is here, must be in absolute value as what it is, working in full potential for life on earth to become life, for life on earth to exist without any abuse, any destruction, And this would make sense, because abuse makes no sense, war makes no sense, poverty makes no sense, and it is as it does, it has no sense of life, via no common sense of physical reality. The building blocks of reality are of rings of sound, an infinite design that allows creation. Thus life can be understood, as it is a gift to express life.

Thus, my back problems are myself misaligned to here. For which I must forgive the limitations as ideas, beliefs and opinions of what I have defined myself as within a system of inequality, a pyramid that is not a bad design per say, but as a design used to organize men, into values of more than and less than, into suppression of common sense as life, it is a mis-use of structure, as how we have allowed that which we have created to distribute what supports the physical world as resources,  as money, to be denied and metered out by varying degrees, to suppress the life that each of us is, so that self understanding as life is limited. Why and how this happened, does not matter, as this can be understood once we all come here, to physical reality, as the game of survival is removed, through creating a structure on earth that supports all of the physical world absolutely, respecting it as the life, this being the value, that it is, here. Support the Equal Life Foundation, walk the lessoning of judgement as the thoughts, emotions and feelings that have been taught as a consequence of separation from common sense of physical reality. Fill in the void of understanding through quieting the voice of judgement as the mind, the superstitions that are the smoke and mirrors that create the unknown. This storm that is of lack, that must be faced and equalized to physical reality here so that life can begin.

Check out the Free Interview on Eqafe.com

Day 389 Self Forgiveness on the Manner of Consciousness

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become a machine of infinite affinity to ideas, opinions and beliefs, instead of looking with and as my self as life, breathing here, realizing the physical, equalizing this within this being myself in common sense as  myself as life, absolutely directive within the principle of what is best for all, where there is not fear, only absolute focus on being directive with consideration of all life , where all life is me and i am it.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand the limitation that objectification into a more than and a less than creates, as a separation from awareness of the physical world as me, where I allow myself to become stagnant within one dimension only, within and as my mind, as consciousness as pictures,   which is to say that I move as limited knowledge and information, which is in and as itself not good or bad, but limited, and thus a separation and thus stagnant, a suppression , which we can see is the system playing out on earth, which in totality is a separation from the physical earth, thus there is not respect for earth , for the physical, as the totality of life, as earth is not considered, and this lack of perception, this lack of depth, this lack of awareness, this separation compounds to the point where the action of the many as the physical body of a collective of men, is not respected, is not seen and realized for the life that it is, as the few that represent the outflow of each of our inner separation from life, as the physical,  simply play out the extreme of our inner accepted and allowed inner separation, thus what exists as the system of men, is the consequence of separation from life, from respect and equal consideration of all life, of all of the physical, this physical world that which is real, that which sustains us, that which sustained heaven, which is why such a statement existed that said that heaven had to be brought to earth, I mean why would such a thing be said?

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear describing the extent of separation that is the mind, composed of thoughts created and recited again and again by parents who were themselves in separation, and thus what was said was not all bad it was simply words that taught/constructed a placement on a grid that is the outward manifestation of the inner separation of the human, thus this present economic system on earth as the human, is the representation of our separation, each of us, from life into and as consciousness.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see, realize and understand that there is no ease until there is equality and oneness with and as the physical, that there is not ease until the separation into a heaven and a hell is brought back into equality and oneness with and as the physical being real, being what sustains us, being what is the value, and thus the value is all of the physical as the physical is a symbiotic world where this physical world functions as an interconnectedness, where there is no monopoly within the natural world as this will not work, because it is trying to force an idea on how earth should be from a starting point of separation into and as consciousness, as limited values, not good or bad, simply blown out of proportion, the effects of which cause a cognitive dissonance, as separation from equality and oneness to and as life here.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand the the knowledge and information in and as my mind, that is an echo of the present system manifest on earth, is a lack of common sense of self as life, as same substance that is the composition of all life on earth.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the consumerism system is composed of limited values that disregard the physical world.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that believing that I have affinities to certain things, as other humans, instead of looking here and realizing the expression of life in all things as the physical is the expression of life, is myself in separation from equality and oneness to the physical world here.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that when I gravitate towards something, as another person, I am in effect following what sounds like my own accepted and allowed values, as moving towards what “ sounds” as I am, what is energetically of same “ drone” of belief, opinion and idea, where the manners of the person move in specific ways, of which I compare to my own accepted and allowed manners, and thus am I following what is of like mannerism, not seeing realizing and understanding that the very movements of myself here as the physical is a collection of beliefs as values I have accepted and allowed, built according to class and race, gender and nationality, all not good or bad, yet built in separation from equality and oneness, acceptance and allowance, of respect and consideration for all of the actual physical world that is me, and example of which, was that when I was in Europe, when I lived there, in the tourist season I constantly had Dutch people walking up to me and speaking Dutch to me, and I would look at them and say that I did not speak Dutch that I was not Dutch, and the Dutch person would react in surprise and say but you look Dutch, which makes sense within my family, because my father came to America from Metz, and my mother came to America from Germany near the Dutch border, thus the past is embedded within the manners I exist as , as what was sensed and imitated from my parents as a child in the first seven years of my life, and thus i am a product of generations of collected beliefs, opinions and ideas that are of separation from equality and oneness to and as the physical, all a separation from being equal and one to and as the actual physical world, a separation from practical common sense of the physical, directly, here.

I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I am a product of a system of separation, which as an accepted and allowed separation from the physical world, a world as a system that functions in one-dimensional living, as the beacon of the mind is a map of limited imprint, which is not good or bad, simply a selection of values then followed as what is real, creating a bubble of separation from what is real , from what sustains us as the physical world, thus consciousness is our separation, our inferiority to and as life, the gift given, to be an expression of life, the gift as the actual physical world, to become equal and one to and as creation of the expression of life as the physical, which is the only way to becoming equal and one in expression as life, here.

I commit myself to when and as I see and realize a dis-ease with  here, within and without, to stop and to breath and to slow myself down, as reaction, as a sense of vertigo, and I bring myself back here, into and as a state of ease with and as breath, and I look at the separation manifest as loss of self esteem, as a voice of blame and spite, as bitterness, as victimhood, as jealousy, as envy, as self pity,  all of which are judgement, an act of comparison, as being myself within limitation, and I direct from here, I follow through within and as the principle of what is best for all, I no longer accept and allowed an end game as idea as knowledge and information only without practical application, I bring all thought, my accepted and allowed map, into and as what is best for all, here, as this is the only choice, to be equal and one to and as the physical here, which will take practice and time, as the separations have become habits of survival, and thus must be deconstructed , seen and realized as separations, and brought back into an expression of life, equal and one.

I commit myself to seeing realizing and understanding that  the separations must be forgiven, which will then allow myself to stabilize in and as breath, to stop, slow down, the storm of the mind, and the reactions as emotions and feelings, the collection of beliefs, as a survival suit, the feelings being the good, to hide the separation as the limitation as the “ bad” as a value of one thing being more than another, where the feelings are the intensification of the bad into being considered a positive, which is really a justification for accepting and allowing the judgement of more than and less than, a resistance, a  pushing away into the conformity behavior , where common sense is suppressed, causing dis-ease with and as life, as the present system is life in reverse within a system of limitation, inequality, manifest as what exists on earth with the amount of abuse to the physical world, the behaviors of which are visible in the news, of which consciousness, if allowed, ignores, as consciousness is a tool being used as a mechanism of separation from equality and oneness to and as life, here.

I commit myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that since I have followed the map of limited values as consciousness as mind,  if I try to “hold” the perception of space here in and as myself, even down to being able to have the strength to hold tension and then releasing this tension in and as my physical body, it takes an effort, as my ability to hold and sense the physical world has not been developed as all I have done is followed a map, where i become myopic in clinging to one point at a time, as I as an instrument of life, have practiced separation, and limited common sense, thus the development of myself in using common sense will take time, as it took seven years to build enough beliefs, opinions and ideas, as images of my environment of a system of separation into a grid of inequality, that it will take time to deconstruct my own separation as what I learned from generations of such accepted and allowed behaviors unequal to the physical, to life, in totality.

Related articles

• Day 378 Self Forgiveness of the unknown.
• 375 Paranoia of the unKNOWN Self Forgiveness Thought
• Day 383 The Paranoia of the Unknown: The illusion of ONE hand before our Eyes
• Day 372 Heaven was a lesser dimension, the mind is the sound of your separation.
• Day 374 The paranoia of the unKNOWN cont.
• Day 380 Self Commitments, Paranoia of the unknown