I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that when I believe that I must complete something within a set period of time, I end up skimming the surface and within this creating ideas and beliefs as a guide within the end product of goal desired and miss what is actually here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that in having a goal, I end up following an idea, and lose common sense of what can be done here, as I become obsessed with the goal and believe that I must do more in relation to the singular goal i have set for myself, as I rush wanting this goal to be done before I take on another activity, not seeing realizing and understanding that I can let go what is not necessary to be done in reality in relation to one thing, and remain focused here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that when I become obsessed with one goal, I limited my ability to be here, lose objectivity in relation to understanding that some things I walk through cannot be immediately “finished “ or completed in one day.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have the thought that a goal must be completed immediately, where losing myself within this want and desire I am losing sight of the very rhythm of what is necessary to complete some goals, that take time over a few days or weeks, and within this I obsess over the goal and fall into gloom and doom, imagined, possibilities in constantly thinking about the goal, as I hold a belief that I must think about the goal until it is completed, or I might “miss” something, when in fact it is this obsession that causes a loss of common sense, as I become separate in my obsession, and thus anxious.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to allow myself to imagine a goal not being completed, as part of my obsessing over the goal in fear i have missed something, where I become the fear i have missed something instead of looking at what is here, walking the steps , where as I walk I discover what needs to be done and thus the answer come with the walking and my obsessing is simply obsessing, and thus an act of separation from what is actually here, and within this I end up getting less done because I end up spending so much time enacting possible scenarios out in and as my mind.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have internal dialogues where I have a thought that “ this might happen”, or “oh no, I didn’t think about this”, of “what if this happens”, and none of these things are actually here, which is to not deny planning, but to look practically in common sense and to not bring in fears from the past, and to realize that theprocess of reaching the goal can change as the outcome is walked towards within the steps necessary to compete the goal.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to mull over the choices I have made in relation to the goal and to place all manner of fears as judgements of more than and less than in relation to ideas of what might be lost or gained, placating fears based on what i have been taught is more than and less that within the culture in which I live.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to allow the back chat as the mind as a collection of moral codes as analysis of what the decisions I make are as a value measured as what i have been taught that has no awareness of what is actually real as this physical world.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not realize that within this I become anxious and end up pacing around waiting for the goal to be completed, not realizing that this restlessness of myself is in separation from what is here, as I am anxious to hurry up and complete what I started, not seeing what I am doing in common sense, where worry and thinking about a decision already made is not going to add any special power of drive to the completion of the goal, and will only turn myself, as a behavior, into a restless personality of anticipation in relation to the completion of the goal, on which within this character I become obsessive and compulsive.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that within this I place pressure on myself, just as clouds place pressure in the falling tides through barometric pressure, causing the tides to not move as fluidly, and am I the same as my clouds of obsession cause a pressure within in and as my desire to complete a goal immediately, and I end up causing myself to stagnate and no longer move fully aware of myself in and as breath, as I am off in and as my mind , in worry, and fret and questioning about every decision I have made in relation to a desired outcome.
I commit myself to slowing myself down and letting go of the decision I have made in relation to the step right in front of me as me, and to let this step complete itself before thinking about the step in a future that is not what is here within this breath in this moment.
I commit myself to slowing down and breathing, to stop myself from skimming the surface of what is actually here, as I am possessed and obsessed with completing a goal.
I commit myself to realizing that within obsessing I am separating from myself into and as judgements and allowing fears to imagine myself into a possible scenario that has nothing to do with what is actually here, where breath allows more insight into what is here than any dialogue in and as fear as my mind.
I commit myself to no longer judging the outcomes of a goal not immediately completed, as the mind as myself tends to judge the process within failure, and weigh possible success way before the goal can possibly be completed, causing a lot of unnecessary worry, stress and fear to become what I believe in and as allowing the mind to be all that I am here, in separation from looking at the totality of what is necessary to complete some tasks.
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