I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that as a child I took on the behaviors of my parents as this was all that was available to communicate, eventually hating myself for what I had accepted and allowed, where I did not understand the totality of this system, and thus being so small I had no way of escaping this, just as my parents had no way of escaping this, and all of it based on fear of standing up and being myself, and actually trusting myself, even within realizing I was small.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that all my hate is self hate, all my anger is my own anger towards myself.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that what comes out of my mouth is the placating words of justification to make thechoice I made, which has become a supposed free choice, voiced again and again and given as answer, collectively accepted- making it seem ok because everyone is doing this, that is just this, an excuse to not have to face what I have accepted and allowed as ignoring what is actually physically here as this world, where if I return to my childhood, I will see, realize and understand that at one time there was no choice, and that I fought against what was taught by my parents, knowing full well there was no choice but to realize this physical world which is why I rebelled as much as I did, because I realize this physical world was being ignored,
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see realize and understand that the thing I feared, which was my parents was the thing I kept close, so as to be ever ready to face the object of my fear, to prepare myself to answer to that which I feared, and in the process train myself to become one and equal to that which I accepted and imitated in and as not being able to stand up against what was ignoring what was actually here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that all hate is self hate, that all anger is by self about self, as we know that we are the cause of separation from what is actually real here, as this physical world.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that myself as life took on the cloak of invisibility to hide myself from this world, not realizing that in hiding from this world, i was not in fact living and thus not in fact participating within and as life here.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I became the voice of my parents as fear, as this was the state of this existence on earth.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that there was no way I could have changed what was here all alone and by myself, as it would take many to stand and self realize that the value was life and that this physical world was what was in fact real, and seeable, yet within this present system where the actual physical state is ignored, because should it really be looked at many of the practices existent within this system would be revealed as absolutely abusive and unacceptable, and yet the current practice is to have ideas and theories on paper without actual clear complete physical evidence, where workers go along with the game in order to have money, even when they know what they are doing is ignoring what is here thinking it will not show up and someone else down the line will deal with what is unacceptable, yet this time is here and accumulating exponentially thus there is not more time to continue ignoring, through non allowance of, what is actually physically happening on this planet, where there are so many, as what is here as the human is what has been accepted and allowed for generations, finally catching up with us and thus there is no choice but to stand and to realize that the only choice is to do what is best for all, to no longer allow any practice that does not consider the whole. which will be difficult as ignorance has existed for so long it has become a fortress and thus will take an effort to remove to allow what is real, as life, as the value, to exist.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see realize and understand that I cannot blame anyone for my actions, as only I can be responsible for myself as life, and myself as life knows there is no choice but to support what is best for all, to ensure that everything on this planet is cared for as being the value as what is here, all of it, life.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that the only choice was for myself to stand up within this system and become thechange as what is best for all, yet this whole system was/is held in place by those fearing death in fearing not having money, not seeing, realizing and understanding that this is the means and the ways to start to organize this world in such a way that all life is supported to end this game in and as a fear of death, where the being of ourselves as this fear, is what has manifested on this earth, and thus no direction in and as support of life exists, where only micro actions, to create a happy story in the media of doing good exists, and thus, as is so evident, no real solutions have actually happened as the same abuse continues to exist.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that I got lost, I became the loss of myself as life, as I entered this system of inequality as I became addicted to the highs and lows of energy, as I learned to move within this system in and as and through energy, where it is actually impossible for most to get to the top within a system where very few ever make it to the top of this pyramid, as there is only so much room at the top, and so many followers needed to support the few who have managed to convince the rest that this earth can be owned , when in fact this earth has no signature of ownership but what man has subjectively placed in separation from a freely giving earth.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that my mind is the idea, belief, opinion maker in relation to this system of inequality, a system of more than and less than, and that all thoughts, emotions and feelings are the self built shield of value as image as energy as desperation, as fear of death, as all taught as how one moves self, what is made so real seeming that to stand back is seemingly non existent, this emotional feeling self of protection and defense as values, like the emotions and feelings are like weapons of combat where one had limited values as the choice of weapon and the family was the “trade” show of choices given as values learned with which to build a suit that was what was believed to enable one to survive, and within this never learning to see what was actually physically here, and within this there is no blame or shame, there is only self realizing self as life, bringing self back to here, to the physical, placing oneself equal and one to what is physically here, to accept what has been created and to walk from there, yet must ALL on this earth become one and equal to and as this physical world, and here will expression as life begin, a journey to and as life, here, and to deny this is insane, as this, even if one does not yet see this, is not continuing with accepting the present existential abuse on this earth, that which is unacceptable.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that all this takes is to stand and say NO MORE, meaning no “ more than”s” as there is only giving as one would like to receive, which at this point is to organize this world to support life, as the means are here, it just needs distributing the basics and getting this first step organized and the world communicating with patience and humility, where even I would drive a truck across America to deliver something to a remote area if this was what was needed, as this would be better than pushing a piece of paper that was simply a collection notice for a bank, as this action is meaningless and no way to live, or proscribing a pill that simply masked a symptom without addressing the cause of the symptom having no insight or training into the layering of emotions and feelings as compounded non resolved to equality and oneness issues as thoughts that were self in fear of loss - in sphere of separation from here- in a division made huge as a polarity- and thus within this selling of a product that is not even understood as should this be understood in totality one could not, would not give this “masking’ pill, where homeopathic practices and beliefs already know that a layering exists as this practice addresses the layers/payers/pairs of manifested disease, through removing, layer by layer, the discordant symptoms addressing the physical symptoms step by step, but this is not a practice that can be owned and utilized to provide endless dividend to a few, as this practice uses what is here, provided freely by this earth, to maintain physical ease, yet see, realize and understand that physical ease develops a constant and the ability to see what is here, thus even this is a threat to a system of inequality, which is so obviously a crime against life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that every time I am in a emotional “state” of unworthiness I am in fact not here, I am in judgement and thus in fear, I am abdicating myself as life, separating myself from a common sense in and as the physical, where I must stop and breath and accept what is here and look at what is here and work with what is here, without any action of blame or shame, and also to not create an idea of what this means, which is tricky because I have been trained to do this, thus it will take constant diligence to not allow this within and as what i am here, this presence - so to speak- of a burningrighteousness is an indicator that I have separated myself from here, thus within and as humility there is no sense of material gain, per-say, but only becoming aware, one and equal to what is here, as what is here in this moment of breath, as this becoming of myself is the gift of life, as what is real and not some actual material gain, yet within this, at present this system of inequality has existed for so long that it will take time to realign all that is here equal and one to this physical world and thus one cannot “race ahead” nor can one deny that what has been created and allowed needs physical sustenance, as this is the process of self realization and b-earthing oneself here, and because of this there is no ascension, thus what is here, as what has been accepted and allowed must be faced with every breath into and as becoming oneness and equality with what is here.
I forgive myself to removing this imposed body of protection and defense as judgements, and thereby lightening myself, as in taking away the burdens of my judgements, learned within childhood as I faced the devil as the mind as my parents as what they learned, and not judge this, but simply forgive this, to remove what is physically constricting the very breath within and as me, as we know that the physical body becomes ill when there is not enough oxygen in the blood, as there is not enough breath in the physical body as the instrument of life, as thus does the very cells of myself cluster and clot, mimicking my own action of barriers as protection and defense, within as without, as the existential borders on this earth, and thus to I fester and rot within as is so evident on this earth with the amount of cancer and other disease, thus if onebreathes and becomes aware of all movement within and as the physical, and realizes this constriction as fear, and self forgives this, as emotions , thoughts and feelings, will the b-earthing process begin, and self will begin to feel as though self is lighter as in carrying less, as in freeing self up as a physical body where self will begin to actually be able to breath, thus must one walk self forgiveness, to self realize, where I know of nothing else on this planet that offers this except the desteni I process, and even this is cheaper than any other process out there, and it works, it is like a home I go path as in homeopathic tool that self can use to bring one self back to the child one was, meaning as a state of accepting and giving, where there are no longer any bigger than self parents there to punish - as these parents knew nothing else, and all of us have done the same as what we were taught, thus all there is, is to get all of this cleared up.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see, realize and understand that a state of feeling worthless, is myself in judgement, which means I am “in judgement” and thus I am not here, where any manner of mind “back chat” - should I stop and listen to myself- such as “ she is more in this way or that way than myself” or “ he is going to supersede me” or, “ this person has more of this or that than me, and therefor will be noticed more than myself as I will lose, or become second” etc. etc. all of this a belief in a more than and a less than, as self busily climbing the scaffolding of the system of inequality that is created by the human and imposed on this earth in separation from what is here that gives to allow self to b-earth self as life, equal and one, with and as this physical world, the real perfection as life in expression, allowing all to understand life, as this is the value.
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