Monday, February 4, 2013

Day 274 Fear of speaking Imagination Dimension

Another playout , as imagination in and as my mind are of actions where I believe myself to have been slighted and or hurt, as my words and what I speak as not being heard. If I allow myself to believe that I have not been heard without looking at what was said/sowed within self honesty, self direction, self responsibility in and as life within the principle of what is best for all is best for self as life, as the substance that is equal and one in all existent, as the physical world, then, I am playing out a drama as mind only without equal and one relationship to the physical, as this is life, and not something separate. The back chat, as mind, as inner conversations, are like nurturing a hurt, nurturing a separation in and as a limited belief, based in self interest/survival creating a conflict,/war with an existence that includes all life, the physical. So, as mind only, the physical is ignored/rejected, in common sense. Allowing myself to be a monoculture of mind only, is existing within separation, manifest as energy, memories, voices of righteous good and bad, ignorant of life - a constant sound of being as equality and oneness to what is equal and one in all, the substance of life, thus there is no aloneness but allowing mind only, as this is separation from life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become an inner conversation of hurt, not seeing realizing and understanding that withinfeeling/placating/sympathizing/nurturing/speaking about hurt, I am in separation from common sense equal and one expression with and as life, here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that in believing that what I speak, has not been heard, and taking this personally into a character of self pity, and woe, a sense of loss, and justifying this within a self judgement of not being able to speak, or not being listened to, the only solution is to stop and slow down and speak within defining what is here, to not allow ambiguous ideas, beliefs and opinions that bear no witness to what is physically existent on earth.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that when and as I allow an inner conversation, as back chat, a voice of judgement of self or another, as a belief of self hurt with a polarity of righteousness I am in separation of self direction, of common sense, with what is best for all.
I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting myself to see that a conversation of self hurt, as self pity and self woe, is not a solution, as this is self as mind being inexpectation/wait/ self validation/self innerrest, seeking agreement based on limited values chasing a fantasy morality of more than and less than, gain and loss, and not self looking at what exists where what is best for all is able to be seen within this actual physical world, thus is the physical what is real, and thus, the gift of life, here. 

I commit myself to seeing, realizing and understanding that there is only here, to hear and thus to speak equal and one with and as the physical within what is best for all, as what is best for this actual physical existence, where it is not words that are good or bad, but that they reflect what is best for this actual physical world, as this is life.
I commit myself to seeing, realizing and understanding that what is best for this physical world is what is real, thus no righteousness need exist, as the actual physical world has specific needs within optimum function, thus when these needs are not met, the physical stops functioning, and thus, how this world works and functions can be known, as this is the gift of understanding life in and as the physical, which no real parent or supposed “god” would deny, this being, in and as the actual physical, equal and one, is the gift of life, of becoming one and equal to and as life, here.

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