Day 291 Fear of speaking Behavioral dimension

Fear of speaking Physical dimension
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to lose my breath, when and as I speak with another.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have an erratic breath when speaking.
i forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that when I begin to speak, if I have become “breathless” I am in separation from being at ease, with and as myself and am missing breaths, and thus allowing and accepting myself to become a physical behavior of uncertainty and anxiety, “skipping a beat”, no longer remaining calm and gently here, equal and one with what is here, in common sense of here, able to look at the details of what is here.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to allow myself to become overwhelmed with what is here, as the words I and/or another speaks, where all I can do it slow myself down and listen and speak with ease, to get what I want to say across, as this behavior of “gasping” for air, as in not being at ease with and as breath here, is an indication of being absent in awareness of here, and thus inferior to here in common sense of the physical world, this which is real, as the gift of life.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become the past, projecting this past onto a future, in and as a belief, that I will not be understood.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that what I have to say will not be heard, not seeing realizing and understanding that often others with whom I talk, are missing breaths/have shallow breaths, of which I was made aware of years ago, as I knew a woman who taught people to slow down and breath, as this was a method she taught and the premise was that most dis-ease is caused by a lack of proper calm breathing.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not see, realize and understand that there have been times where i have spoken with ease and in a gentle calm, and that at these times there was no added stress within communication, thus such a state of calm within and as speaking exists and thus such a “state’ can then be maintained and regulated, in self awareness, which means that each of us can be aware of what we are doing with every breath, here, and that any moment of “excitement” while speaking can be realized simply by paying attention to one’s breath, this being the gift of the physical to regulate ourselves as life, here, where it is not the thoughts, emotions and feelings that determine ease, but the actual physical behaviors of our human physical bodies.

I commit myself to becoming aware of my breath with every step I take, to see, realize and understand what I am accepting and allowing with every step I take and every word I speak, to realize that in paying attention to my human physical body, i can determine where and when I go into anxiety and stress and thus, separate from here, from common sense of what is physically here, as it is here, as this physical world that determines myself as life.
I commit myself to seeing realizing and understanding that when as and I begin to lose my breath, to separate into and as an unsteady breath, I stop and before I speak, I bring myself back into and as a steady breath, even using the “four count breath” before speaking, to become a behavior of ease, equal and one , in common sense of here, before i speak, seeing realizing and understanding that making sense of what is here, without stress and anxiety can only be done with ease in common sense of here.
I commit myself to becoming aware of when and as I read with anxiety and dis-ease, to breath and slow myself down and follow each word, whether spoken or written, by and as my self or another, to manage myself as life, respecting this gift in and as life here in common sense of what is best for all, to give as I would like to receive, as receiving response from others, done in calm, with patience is how I would like to be spoken to.
I commit myself to seeing, realizing and understanding that sometimes one must speak up to stop another from being a bully with words, as ideas, opinions and beliefs, yet even this can be brought back to speaking within and as a state of ease, equalizing self to a calm even breath, which should be the steps within a sequence as the outcome, within and without, as this is the process of working to and towards equality and oneness, with and as this actual physical world.